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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Unsolicited beauty advice ...      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 MissScawlett
Joined: 3/26/2015
Msg: 1
Unsolicited beauty advice ...Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I’m still baffled about what I’m about to tell y’all but here goes ... I recently got an email from a regular forum poster who took it upon herself to scrutinize my picture and told me in no uncertain terms how much I could improve my appearance and my life in general by getting a facelift! She even told me about all the procedures she’d had – and there were a bunch -- now “everyone” is fawning over her, telling her how amazing she looks – even has random doctors admiring her “work” ... because all men want the “pretty girls.” I’m apparently not a member of that exclusive club, but maybe I could be with a little work lol

I’ve had no prior conflict or disagreement with this person via a forum post, nor have we had any previous email communication. I didn’t ask for a profile or picture review. We are not “friends” – cyber or otherwise. But while I was pondering that message, I could hear Carly Simon singing “You’re So Vain.”

The reason I was so taken aback by this unwanted advice is because she knows nothing about me or my life. She’s completely unaware that I almost died after a liver transplant in 2004 and after being hospitalized many, many times pre-transplant and being in the ICU for 6 months post-transplant, a hospital is the last place on earth I’d voluntarily re-enter – not even for a free facelift. A second chance at life isn't granted to most people. I’m just happy and grateful to be alive. And it’s the kind of happiness a gallon of botox or a facelift can’t buy – it comes from within.

Quite frankly, the thought of allowing someone to slice on my face with a sharp instrument makes me nauseous. Somehow a “frozen” smile and expressionless eyes isn’t what I want to see when I look in the mirror. I decided a long time ago I was going to age gracefully or ungracefully, whatever God had planned for me. I’m certainly not opposed to plastic surgery to those of you who choose that route. That’s a personal decision. But why would a total stranger would feel impelled to impart such “advice” to another total stranger? I’m sure she thought she was helping and honestly, I’m kind of sad for anyone who has their self-esteem so wrapped up in their appearance and the approval of strangers.

Has anyone else received unsolicited beauty advice from a random stranger and how did you handle it?
 sacredrain
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 2
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 10:59:52 AM
I think you're beautiful MissScawlett. Suggest you ignore the unsolicited advice, block the issuer, and don't let it ruin your day.
 ThatGirlNamedAlli
Joined: 12/28/2013
Msg: 3
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 11:01:57 AM
Sounds like a passive-agressive mean girl dig by her.

I've just had one guy tell me how I should wear makeup and it would increase my chances here and grow my hair and whatever else he said. I wasnt offended, just annoyed he had the testicles the size of mouse nuts to do that.

My own cousin has said something like that too. But he's an ass and I don't speak to him anymore.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 4
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 11:26:20 AM
I'm guessing the little "angel" was just trying to help....

Why not post her name? Not to shame... but in case anyone else wants that kind of.... advice.
 trinity818
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 5
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 11:59:13 AM

Has anyone else received unsolicited beauty advice from a random stranger and how did you handle it?


lol. Well, no. But anyone familiar with my posting style would probably avoid contact with me! (Better known as my occasional lack of self-control.)

I've been told more than once over the years that I should wear more makeup and "pretty myself up". It was funny then...it still is. I'm not thrilled with how I'm aging, but at least I'm still alive.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 6
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 12:04:47 PM
Any unsolicited advice from someone who's not in your circle is worth what you paid for it. No matter what the possible intent, it's up to you how you handle it and don't feel you need to be "polite" and respond. Not all communication is worthy of a response it's up to you how to invest your time.
 Deedeelogan
Joined: 12/1/2013
Msg: 7
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 1:24:54 PM
Maybe she gets a referral fee from the doctor/clinic where she had the work done and is just drumming up business?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 8
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 1:42:08 PM
I wouldn't worry about it. The vain are more often than not vacuous as well - apparent in this case because to have any natural intelligence (as opposed to "book smart" memorization of topics) a person would understand that providing unsolicited (and unwarranted may I add) advice such as this is just plain stupid, no matter if the intent was to drum up business to get referral fees or not. Sounds like she may have had one too many surgeries and wound up nip tucking a bit of grey matter in the process.
 MaleFeasance
Joined: 3/13/2015
Msg: 9
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 1:44:25 PM
I’m still baffled about what I’m about to tell y’all but here goes ... I recently got an email from a regular forum poster who took it upon herself to scrutinize my picture and told me in no uncertain terms how much I could improve my appearance and my life in general by getting a facelift!
---------
Why didn't you tell her to send you a cashier's check or money order? Suggestions are useless unless the person making the suggestion is going to be supportive.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 10
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 1:57:48 PM

But why would a total stranger would feel impelled to impart such “advice” to another total stranger?

there are a couple of reasons that I can think of. "there is none so pious as the new convert". she's probably over-excited by all the attention she's getting and wants others to share in her glee fest via direct experience.


Has anyone else received unsolicited beauty advice from a random stranger and how did you handle it?

yeah somebody once told me I should put on a dress every once in a while
I said no. azzhole.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 11
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 4:43:47 PM

Has anyone else received unsolicited beauty advice from a random stranger and how did you handle it?


I was sitting in a crowded bar one night and a medium sized drunk guy came over to me and said, "Gimme that seat ya shrimp or i'll rearrange your face."

so I hit him across the face with my beer bottle, gave him a knee lift, picked up the stool and clobbered him over the head with it and said, "It's all yours."
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 12
view profile
History
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 4:59:57 PM
There used to be a little old lady on the forums who often got told how sweet she was. I don't think I ever had any interactions with her, but maybe she hated my opinions, who knows. Anyway one day she sent me a nasty little email about what all was wrong with me, my looks, my character, and what was in my profile as to men that I'm attracted to. Then several others told me off too, so I assumed they were a group who thought people like me should know we weren't wanted 'round these here parts. I laughed and blocked them. I got of couple of snide remarks from them in the forums and then nothing. I know the little old lady is still around because I ran across one of her posts when someone brought up an oldie, and she seems to still be here. I consider the source, I mean what kind of person would do that, sucks to be them.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 13
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 5:10:26 PM
oh! I know who the face lift Queen is around here. ..... Did you tell her that she needed them because of aborted Down Syndrome fetus' phenomenon?
 aj7125
Joined: 11/28/2014
Msg: 14
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 5:36:00 PM
OP, usually if some "stranger" is going to tell you who and what you look like and what you should or shouldn't do, that person will never be happy with themselves. The outside may look great for them but that is all they have. Their life isn't as awesome as what they look like. Plastic attracts plastic.
 7seatac
Joined: 8/12/2015
Msg: 15
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 7:04:59 PM
Hmmm. Aborts Down Syndrome fetuses?? Must be the Chinese soup nazi.

I can't imagine anyone doing this. At least anyone with any brain. Sad.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 16
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 8:05:51 PM
^^^well, this one posted it basically.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 17
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/26/2015 11:15:02 PM
So is ms. Scarlett really the big green giant? Dum dum dum...


Green giant.



Edit: I am an abortion advovare. Beware.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 18
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 12:08:40 AM
Advocate. ****.
Give no truck.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 8:28:02 AM

Has anyone else received unsolicited beauty advice from a random stranger and how did you handle it?
Yes ... I grow my hair out because I like it long. At the point in which I get enough length on it (about 20 inches) then I cut off the length needed in order to donate it to Locks of Love. For those who do not know about it ...
Locks of Love is a non-profit charity based in the United States. The organization accepts donations of human hair and money with the stated intention of making wigs for Canadian and American children in need due to medical conditions that have caused them to permanently lose their hair.

My hair is baby fine and has natural waves/curls. During this last move I made, I discovered a baggie full of hair from my children ... long pony tails we had cut off over the years ... and they too will be donated.

I enjoy long hair ... love the feel of it brushing over my skin in summer when the wind blows.

OP ... I've actually had men in here tell me that older women should not have long hair.

My response: "Whatever ... ... NEXT!"
 MissScawlett
Joined: 3/26/2015
Msg: 20
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 9:05:44 AM
Thank you all for your input. Hopefully that person has seen this post and won't offer up any more advice to anyone else. I'll admit I was a little hurt when I first read that message because I was so appalled that anyone would do such a thing, then I just got mad lol
 Mr_J_Cash
Joined: 7/2/2015
Msg: 21
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 9:30:51 AM
Miss Scawlett,
That was truly a rude thing for someone contact you with. Almost unbelievable.

If you are angry enough and seek some form of revenge/justice you always have options to report the person. You can click on the "Report this message for inappropriate content" link in the message she sent you. That surly applies here. You can use the report user button at the bottom of her profile. Or you can email CSR@pof.com. You could even do all three. If you are angry enough and feel vindictive, you could post the user name and the message verbatim. (But that one should be a last resort.) Otherwise just try to ignore it as someone exposing their intelligence (or more like lack of intelligence) and, as previously suggested, block them.
 ClooneysMentor
Joined: 8/2/2015
Msg: 22
She wanna pearl necklace
Posted: 8/27/2015 10:03:33 AM


now “everyone” is fawning over her, telling her how amazing she looks


Tell her diamonds suit you better then the pearl necklaces she's getting with the face lift...


She was gettin' bombed
And I was gettin' blown away

And she held it in her hand
And this is what she had to say

A pearl necklace

She wanna pearl necklace
She wanna pearl necklace
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 23
She wanna pearl necklace
Posted: 8/27/2015 10:16:17 AM
Now I have to know who the Lift and Brag woman is :/
I would have said " you should ask for some of that money back" no, wait, I would have said if you pay for it!
No advice for me - I have an evil resting bytch face so ppl back off. I think once some woman said " you know what you should do with your hair?" and I stared back til she blinked.
It is really kinda funny that she did that - prolly meant no harm but a serious wtf message
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 24
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 10:21:40 AM
MS, you're comfortable with who you are and how you look. Why would you let the unsolicited opinion of another affect your day to day life?
Really, opinions are like ***holes. We all have one, and they all stink. Why, should her opinion stink any less than mine? Does your life have any less value than hers? Or mine? HELL NO!
YOU decide what YOU view as beauty. YOU decide what is important and of value in Your life.

Message this person? back. DILLIGAF. Do I Look Like I Give A FVck.
Her opinion is immaterial to the Quality of Your life. Let the anger go. Don't let the Buzzards grind you down.
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 25
Unsolicited beauty advice ...
Posted: 8/27/2015 10:47:03 AM

Yes ... I grow my hair out because I like it long. At the point in which I get enough length on it (about 20 inches) then I cut off the length needed in order to donate it to Locks of Love. For those who do not know about it ...
Locks of Love is a non-profit charity based in the United States. The organization accepts donations of human hair and money with the stated intention of making wigs for Canadian and American children in need due to medical conditions that have caused them to permanently lose their hair.

My hair is baby fine and has natural waves/curls. During this last move I made, I discovered a baggie full of hair from my children ... long pony tails we had cut off over the years ... and they too will be donated.


Cotter, you and I have been at odds before. And I know this doesn't mean much, but you just earned quite a measure of respect from me.
My mother was a cancer survivor. She was one of few who kicked mesothelioma's ass. Cancer free for nearly a year before complications on her leg amputation claimed her. It wasn't from LOL, but she received a natural wig from some organization and it meant the world to her to feel real hair against her face and neck.
Like you, I've donated my pony ( several times) when it reached mid back/belt length. The idea of some unknown child not suffering the stares and pointing is well worth wearing my hair high and tight for a few months.

Damn, there's dust in the air today.
I'm going to remember this when I respond to your arrogant, insolent, asinine, self centered posts in the future. This worn out old saddle bum's hat is off to you young lady.
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Unsolicited beauty advice ...