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 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 1
Cant do this on POF....Page 1 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
Ok...had the best day ever....

Last night I stopped for gas and smokes.....I got out of my car to walk into pay and I saw this woman pumping gas.....very pretty.....she looked like she was ready to cry....

I stopped and asked her "are you ok?"

She sighed and said "yeah"

And I dont know why.....but I asked her "Do you need a hug hon?"

She paused and thought about it...."yes I would love a hug"

So I walked up and gave her a big ole bear hug.....and went in to pay....

I got my stuff....went out and pumped my gas....

I was getting ready to just get back in the car and leave but she was still filling the car up....

So I stopped and said "I'm taking off.....you want anther hug before I go?"

She said "I would love another hug"....so I gave her another big ole bear hug...this time picking her up( she is very petite)...

As I set her down and was turning to leave I thought.....*what the hell*

I asked her "are you single?"

She said "yes I am"

I asked her "how old are you hon" ( she looked like mid 30's)

She said "I'm 40"

I said...."cool...cuz my cut off is 40....would you like to go out sometime?"

She didnt even answer....she grabbed the sharpie in my shirt pocket and wrote her number on my arm....

I said "hey fair is fair...my turn"....she offered her arm and I wrote my number on it....

She said "call me"

I said "count on it"...

So I called a couple times today....no answer....then I texted on the way home and it got bounced cuz the number is a land line...

Hrm....fake number?...*shrug*...ok....my luck again....

I tried one more time around 6pm....no answer....

At 7:30 my phone rings....same number!!!

"hey would you like to meet for a few mintues?...I'm cooking dinner but I would like to meet you for a quick beer while dinner cooks"

" HELL YES!"(me)

"Know where the dog house is?"(her)

"Yeah I go there all the time I live right by there"(me)

"really?...me too!"(her)

"cool....how about 8pm?"(me)

" k see you then"(her)

Now it was only a couple minutes I had seen her....I know she was cute.....but I cant quite remember what she looks like....Well let me tell you what....when i walked in that bar I saw her right away....and she's a frickin goddess....brunette...long hiar.....petite....very very pretty and about 120....in the pouring rain....

She smiles at me when she sees me......way cool....

She says "hey lets go smoke and talk...I have to get home, I have a chicken in the oven and I cant stay long..but I wanted to have a quick meet with you"

So went went out and chit chatted for about 20 minutes......you know...why are you single, kids, jobs and stuff... etc...

She's smart.....witty.....nice....

She asked me " what made you offer me a hug?"

I said " you just looked so sad...like you needed a hug....so I asked if you needed one.....I swear that's the first time in my life I have done that"

She said " no man in my whole life has ever just noticed I was sad and offered me a hug when I needed one.....not even my ex"

"She said I've seen you a couple times playing pool before but you never even tried to talk to me"

I said " well hon...I was married then....other women werent even on my radar...I loved my wife "

She said "that's a good answer'

I said "no...it's just the truth"

We are going out for dinner thursday!

WOOHOO!
 rwable032
Joined: 1/23/2015
Msg: 2
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/20/2015 10:29:34 PM
You meet the nicest people on a Honda.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 3
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/20/2015 10:29:43 PM
BTW if thursdays date turns into another date....I will be deleting off of here.

Not the kind of guy who would keep a profile on a dating site while I'm dating....not even for the forums.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 4
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/20/2015 10:31:56 PM

You meet the nicest people on a Honda.


LOL...I was in a taurus ...the nighthawk is in the shop getting ready for next summer....
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 5
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 12:02:54 AM
Hope you have a lovely dinner.
Good luck.
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 6
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 3:30:59 AM
Now we know were the "death zone"-women between the ages of 41-50.

Can you imagine...it would be like hugging a corpse!
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 7
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 3:40:47 AM
So that's what I'm doing wrong. I'm not buying gas at the right gas stations. I need to find out where hug deprived women buy their gas.
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/1/2015
Msg: 8
view profile
History
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 3:50:58 AM

Now we know were the "death zone"-women between the ages of 41-50.
I *think* he meant that 40 was his low cut off point.

Lovely story paladin. Sounds very promising. Fingers crossed for you that it keeps going well.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 9
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 4:46:50 AM
Thanks everyone..... and Yes 40 is as low as I would date....and When I offered the hug
.....it was just a hug.....I had no expectations...
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 10
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 4:47:00 AM
Thanks everyone..... and Yes 40 is as low as I would date....and When I offered the hug
.....it was just a hug.....I had no expectations...
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 11
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 7:56:41 AM
As "The Fonz" would say. Ayyy (with a big thumbs up).

Coooool as 'Ell dude.
Gonna' wish ya the best, and Hope we don't see ya around fer much longer.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 12
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 8:43:14 AM
Me too brother....She said shes really glad she met me....I feel.likewise....here's the plan....dinner...then going to see some local live music....already told her We would swing by my house so she could see where I live....If the date is going really well I'm gonna ask her to come in and help me delete my profile after she reads it....cuz why would I stay on a dating site when I'm already dating....right?
This will also show her my intentions are serious....is that a good move ladies?
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 13
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 9:18:43 AM
Not until you know more about her. Otherwise I would think just makes you look like a vat of need
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 14
view profile
History
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 9:34:23 AM
You both seem very needy and over the top.

You don't even know each other.

I wish you the best. But, I'd hold my horses until I knew her much better.

I think there's an issue with boundaries if you go around hugging (or accepting hugs from) strangers, and the subsequent flurry of phone calls and intense "must get together now while dinner is cooking" on the stove just strikes me as needy and desperate.
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 15
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 9:51:26 AM
Way to go paladin!
LOL, And here people think you can't meet anyone even in a grocery store, because it isn't sexy enough! Pffft!

Now about this notion of yours, of deleting your profile for her, in front of her.
If you did this to me I would be thinking, "Whoaaa, Mr Jump the gun, slow down, take it easy now".

By all means you can hide your profile. Give yourself the time to see where this goes. No need to jump into the fire from a frying pan, even if the pan is off the burner and cool to the touch. LOL

Remember this? "I'm still legally tied to the ex for a bit yet........I'd settle for a steady date that is willing to put up with my situation for a while as the air clears..."

Keep your eyes wide open and listen with both ears! Good luck!
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 16
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 9:55:19 AM
I agree with the "Not until you know more about her." The first thing I would want to know is why she was feeling so badly when you met her-to the point where she would hug a total stranger. Most women would not hug a guy they don't know and never met. Maybe she had a big argument or broke up with a boyfriend (or husband), and needed a shoulder to cry on at the time, and you happened to be available, and said she's single because she felt that way at the time, and wants a chance to get away from it all-at least temporarily. So don't be so anxious to seal the deal right from the get-go until you get to know her, since, at this point, you are both strangers who know nothing about each other. When I see a woman who is visibly upset about something, the last thing on my mind is dating potential.
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 17
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 10:05:33 AM
Don't wait too long before telling her you are still married.

I'd be cautious of a woman who readily accepts such embraces from total strangers at a gas pump.
Shows no boundaries and I'd not do it no matter how awful my day was.

Since you didn't meet on POF, why would you make the dramatic gesture of having her read your profile and deleting it together?
Sorry, that's bizarre.

You are falling in love and creating a relationship in your head...you are desperate and it's showing.

Sure, show her where you live so she can stalk you and hang outside your front door after you discover she's a lunatic.

Honestly, slow down, dude.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 18
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 10:46:54 AM
paladin2015- That is GREAT!
Good luck on Thursday, I've never said I don't want to see anyone here again and meant it in a good way, but this time, I do.
Good luck. (awesome story and exactly why I hold out the most hope for IRL). :)
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 19
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 11:16:14 AM
Thanks bama... glad you get it....I will reply to each post later...my phone sucks for trying to post here
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 20
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 11:24:51 AM
Tater...I'm picking her up at her home....we live very close and I have no problem showing her where I live...We hang out at the same.local bar...and although I don't know her personally...we do have mutual friends...we have already asked about each other....I was told she is a very good and kind woman who was dealt a bad hand ....she knows I'm separated and heading to divorce....and that I am a good man who was dealt a bad hand....the rest we will fill in over dinner....sorry you are so jaded....but I have my swagger back...and a date tomorrow....
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 21
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 11:35:39 AM
Lil.....your reading comprehension is lacking....read the OP again.... slowly this time....I clearly stated I have never done that before...it was just instinct....and it got me a date with a pretty..smart...witty woman...the key word being date....and asking her out was an afterthought... not the motive to show a little bit of kindness to a lady in distress....
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 22
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 11:43:31 AM
Man, I'm gonna' echo the others.
Don't even show her the OLD profile. Just put it in hiding and fuggetaboutit.

As for showing her where you live? That's for each to their own. I've never had troubles in the past. Doesn't mean I won't in the future though. Do, however, pay close attention to what she says about others. If she's say, an audiophile, and mentions how Joe Blah has Marantz this and Nakamichi that, I'd hold off. I, temporarily, lost an Oberndorf Sporter because my blabber mouth brother had to spout off at the mouth to his buddies about some of the things I own.
If it weren't for security measures I've taken the young lady I met a few months ago would Not have seen my in home work shop.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 23
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 2:31:31 PM

Man, I'm gonna' echo the others.
Don't even show her the OLD profile. Just put it in hiding and fuggetaboutit.


Ah back on the laptop for a sec...I hate trying to post on my stupid phone....bleh

Nah if it goes well....as in "yes she would like to continue to see me and date exclusively".....I will just pop in....say bye...and delete....

No logical reason to keep the profile at all.......why?

#1 Hiding it and keeping it is "plan B'......and even having a plan B means you are planning ahead for plan A to fail....that's like keeping for your little black book.....just in case this girl you are crazy about doesnt work out...

Or a prenup aggreement "hey baby I love you...marry me.....oh but here sign this in case it dont work out so I can keep all my shit when I throw you out."......

uh....whut?

As a Master Electrician I dont plan for failure...I plan for success....and that is way I'm successful....if plan A doesnt work it's because you failed to properly plan it, and did not include or forsee the possible variables that could lead to failure....or make adjustments to your plan while it was in process which would in turn...prevent failure.

#2....hiding a profile while dating IRL is "keeping secrets"...and omission of fact ...is a lie....and I'm not a lair and I dont keep secrets.

#3...if I am steady dating IRL...there is no NEED for the profile anymore....I have succeeded in my goal of finding someone to date.

#4....after 6 months of beating my head against the wall to gain the attention of women I am attracted to on POF...and after 5 years of having no problem what so ever meeting the same exact type of women IRL....the only purpose to keep the profile would be to use the forums....

And although I like you peeps very much....I'm outta here....why sould I be pecking away at a keyboard when I should be paying attention to the lady I'm dating....


As for showing her where you live? That's for each to their own.


For me it's a non issue....she will already have shown me where she lives when I pick her up tomorrow....and have no problem showing her where I live in return...I live a half a block from the music venue.


I've never had troubles in the past.


I have...lol....bunny boiler freaked when I didnt want to get married and move to maryland after 8 weeks of dating and a bit of sex.....and I mean freaked......non stop phone ringing, 60 texts a day and doing laps around my house....she gave up after a few weeks......Shew...dodged a bullet there....

As for not knowing Ann...

Turns out...since we go to the same bar......Ann and I have mutual friends...friends I trust...they have assured me that Ann is really cool , laid , back....and would go way out of way to help a friend in need...

And as I said...she isnt just pretty....she is gorgeous....and is funny....and she is smart....she...like myself was in a long term marraige to a cheater...only hers was also abusive.....but that's been years ago....much like my situation.

And jeez people....slow down yourselves.....lol...some of you are acting like I'm going propose over dinner on the first date....LMAO!!!!

If it doesnt work out....I might be back.....but frankly I do way better IRL and this was mostly like window shopping anyways....hours of time wasted needlessly crafting messages trying to even get a reply or a profile view...much less a date.

POF.....meh.

What I learned here is that personality,eye contact, light conversation, and body language.... work alot better then this laptop for meeting women...(and I do meet women...I'm far from shy....I dress well when I'm out...smell nice and am well groomed......I also know thousands of jokes and funny life stories).....

Make a woman laugh out load.....watch her eyes sparkle.....and maybe it's becuase I no longer play the "expectation game" tryng to predict the future......I no longer face disapointment which turns to dissatifaction and resentment....I am simply enjoying the hell out of life....as one of my friends said a few months ago "you walked in the bar like you owned the place"

I said "Nah...not the whole place.....just to pool table...and I'm gonna own it all night long ...now rack em"

Yes I only talked to Ann for 20 minutes.....but in that 20 minutes I had her laughing and saw those eyes sparkle and that genuine smile....and even after 20 minutes of talking in person.....I know....I aint met anyone like her yet since I met my wife...

Yeah I'm stoked....who wouldnt be stoked getting attention from the very same type of woman you have been looking for...for years...

So I will go for plan A....and give my best shot...with no expectations....and so if it doesnt work out...I wont have to deal with disapointment and be glad I got to spent some time with her....

Hell I was just happy to get a hug and give a hug to someone who obviously needed it at the time.....and look how that turned out....and this was after work....not when I dressed to kill...


Doesn't mean I won't in the future though. Do, however, pay close attention to what she says about others. If she's say, an audiophile, and mentions how Joe Blah has Marantz this and Nakamichi that, I'd hold off. I, temporarily, lost an Oberndorf Sporter because my blabber mouth brother had to spout off at the mouth to his buddies about some of the things I own.
If it weren't for security measures I've taken the young lady I met a few months ago would Not have seen my in home work shop.


That went waaaay over my head...LOL...you got ripped off by someone you have dated?

I dont have much to rip off....my classic pontiac needs a motor rebuild....by bike is in the shop soon for a rebuild....I have a 25 year old stereo and some furniture and a couple TV's....and slot car track....who's gonna steal it?

And hey peeps....guess what...I'm not 21....I'm 51......and by 21....I had already been with many girls and dated heavily until I met my wife in 1985....and that was love at first site...and I mean she moved in with me after 3 days and never looked back until the end in 2011....it was a good run....

Told her today how thankful I was for the time we had and so glad we have these three wonderful children...I'm glad she's happy and I hope it lasts ( but I know it wont)....and in all honesty....my kids alone are worth it.....I'd do it all again just to have them....and right up till the end....everyone envied us...

I want that again with someone.....if Ann isnt the one I will know soon enough....and I will keep looking until I find her....
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 24
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 2:42:09 PM
I wish you both all the best.

My suggestion is to keep going as you have started.
Everything in real life.
So keep it in real life.
Delete your on line dating profile if you choose but it is not really relevant at this early stage.

If she is talking to mutual friends after you delete your profile tell some of those friends or delete it in their presence so if she asks they can tell her.
Having a mutual friend tell her that you like her and deleted yourself off internet dating so you can concentrate on her could be preferable.

Take it slow and easy.
Enjoy.


p.s.
PLEASE do not complain about your wife during your date.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
Brush it off.
She will be aware from your mutual friends.

If you find yourself starting a sentence with "My wife..." STOP.
 Paladin2015
Joined: 5/29/2015
Msg: 25
Cant do this on POF....
Posted: 10/21/2015 2:50:24 PM
Thanks.....like I said...no expectations.....just enjoy the moments.....

I'm really just going to enjoy having dinner with her and hope she likes to dance...if she has fun tomorrow and that leads to more dates....cool...

I learned a thing or two from my experiences....I was 2 out of 3 guy...meaning I have always made good money and been a good provider....we never had a problem in the bed room...our sex life was awesome....but I had hidden my heart away because I though I was protecting my wife from my fears and doubts.....when in reality I was alienating her affection...of course she chose the wrong path to rectify her feelings....but those feeling where there long anything started to go sideways....I just didnt know it at the time....I thought everything was cool...and she thought I didnt even love her anymore....

Yeah I learned a thing or two....and for my lext love I will be 3 out of 3 guy....the total package.....whether that turns out to be Ann or not is irrelevent....but no reason not to give it a shot....I think she is awesome....
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