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 Baffalobill
Joined: 6/18/2014
Msg: 1
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I think there is way to much pressure on guys in the dating world ..If its not stressful enough just to impress the girl ,You then have to worry about her friends and then her Parents...

The reason i bring this up was a few yrs. ago i went out on a date ..Not realising she was to bring her 2 best friends along 1 female 1 male ......

So between chats and getting a drink she would quickly move her seating position and a have a very quite chat to her "Advisors" .

Then at then end of the night /Date... Her male friend walked up to me and said " Thanks But she...#$%^doesn't think this is going to work out between you both"...

I could see her a few meters away and she just waved basically indicating ...Seeeyaa....!!!

Had i even managed to get over that hurdle i can only imagine what it would have been like to have to face her parents...
 skoalmate
Joined: 2/22/2016
Msg: 2
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 7:50:08 PM
Bill, what kind of girl has to bring an advisory entourage on a date? She sounds very childish. You don't have to impress anyone. Just be yourself and exercise the normal good manners that you should exercise with anyone. You deserve to date women who demonstrate more maturity than that girl did.
 Baffalobill
Joined: 6/18/2014
Msg: 3
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 7:58:20 PM
Yes I understand what you are saying.

But..... from other people that i know from work colleagues and just general friends.. This seems to be the " In thing "and has been like this for a good couple of yrs. .....

Really not my idea of an enjoyable date... If there really is such a thing.....

Perhaps the new dating term should be called ...

" Relationship Prospects and Future Endeavours"...Interview.....

Bring in the Jury...We can all be put in a Category / In boxes !!!!!!

As I feel that is real what it is all about....
 flaneur001
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 4
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Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 8:21:14 PM
OP: What a horrible experience. It sounds to me like she was using you as entertainment with her friends. Just awful. Amazing that you would continue dating after that!
 Baffalobill
Joined: 6/18/2014
Msg: 5
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 8:26:09 PM
Well haven't been on to many dates in life anyway.. Could count them on 1.. 1/2 hands ...This was just a particularly more then nasty experience that's all....
 Baffalobill
Joined: 6/18/2014
Msg: 6
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 9:00:09 PM
Friends / Friends / Friends ...Sorry about that....
 ThatGirlNamedAlli
Joined: 12/28/2013
Msg: 7
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/25/2016 9:05:20 PM
woah, like skoal said, so childish of her. That's so not normal. You had the lucky of meeting one of the worlds geniuses apparently. I hope you don't have to experience that again.
 Baffalobill
Joined: 6/18/2014
Msg: 8
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 2:14:49 AM
That's just the problem.....Its Sooooooo Normal Apparently!!!!!!! .......

I always hear ..."Don't try to figure out women "
Well my thoughts are if I can't ..How can i know what or not to do ???

I'm finally starting to understand why people prefer to live single or live like hermits......Less wasted time -More oxygen to breath ..And overall zero stress....

 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 9
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 4:43:12 AM
I don't which would be worse-meeting someone who brings a friend or friends, or someone who has spotters at the meet location-friends who just happen to show up at the same place and the same time frame by "coincidence".
 scm600
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 10
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 5:17:32 AM
Wow, that was pretty bad! You've got my worst OLD story beat! I don't want to even think about how many 'meet and greets' I've been on and none were quite that bad. Although things in this cyber world are going downhill, I don't think we're all that far down yet. If you keep getting experiences like that, you might want to look at what you're doing wrong.

I usually trade a few (few as in 2-4) emails and maybe a phone call before meeting. Any flakiness or game playing and I'm done. That seems to sort out most of the real whackos.

As far as impressing her crowd? If you're a decent person and live your life with some integrity, you won't have to try. I haven't flunked that test since I was in my teens.
 MyFeetHurt
Joined: 2/22/2016
Msg: 11
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 5:25:21 AM
What that girl did was VERY WRONG, verging on crazy...in the future, if such a thing occurs, I'd not go through with the date.

If you are meeting a person in a safe public place, they should not be bringing other people along.

I would have immediately said so to her & excused myself. Talk about being put on the spot.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 12
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Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 5:34:18 AM
While I agree that this particular experience was an embarrassing drag for you, I disagree that there's a big picture reason to say that All Men suffer more than women, due to SOME women being clumsy about getting friend and relative input on their prospects.

When people do marry, even if it is a "marriage" of personal conviction only, they ARE linking themselves to entire families and social groups. You can complain about that all you like, but it is just a fundamental fact of existence, a basic part of being a human being.

You want instead, for people who pair up to leave town together, never to be seen by friend and family alike again? You'll have to move to another universe.
 Nth_degree1111
Joined: 9/16/2009
Msg: 13
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Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 6:30:32 AM

What that girl did was VERY WRONG, verging on crazy...in the future, if such a thing occurs, I'd not go through with the date.

If you are meeting a person in a safe public place, they should not be bringing other people along.

I would have immediately said so to her & excused myself. Talk about being put on the spot.


Are you back?
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 14
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:02:06 AM

Then at then end of the night /Date... Her male friend walked up to me and said " Thanks But she...#$%^doesn't think this is going to work out between you both"...


I hate this s h it dude. I could tell you, don't do that. Do not go out with bat crazy women like that. Yet, it happens. Variations of this story have happened to many guys. It has happened to me, and by the time you've realize what is going on, it's too late.

What you should learn, is that a date is between two people. Not their fvcking family, their friends, or even co-workers. So every time a woman that you have not had a date says, Hey, I have tickets to this game with my work group. Or come join her with her dancing group, or meet my best friend, who happens to be a guy, realize that this type of women are so insecure or their own shadow that they need to feel validated by their friends even in matters of the heart.

When women have pulled this crap in the past, I tend to turn into an a s s wh o le. Or wait, maybe I was an a ss whole all along, only now I am deathly aware. I am not there to validate myself to them. I am not there to impress her or her friends. I am not there to make them laugh as if I were their monkey. Hell no.

There's a time and place to meet your significant others' friends and family, and that is AFTER you have become a partner. And even then, don't try to impress, simply try to be your self.
 MyFeetHurt
Joined: 2/22/2016
Msg: 15
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:13:38 AM

now I am deathly aware. I am not there to validate myself to them. I am not there to impress her or her friends. I am not there to make them laugh as if I were their monkey. Hell no.

There's a time and place to meet your significant others' friends and family, and that is AFTER you have become a partner. And even then, don't try to impress, simply try to be your self.


Love this, esp. the part about the MONKEY. Goes for both genders.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 16
Impressing a Girl on a date, then her Friends / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:15:35 AM
so, this happened a few years ago. Is it still a common occurance?

Did you employ courtship and pay for everyone?

I'm with IG, I would have had fun with this and been my own type of jerk. They opened the door, set the mood, so why not turn it on them. Hit on her female friend. network with the male friends for things in your hobby/passion/interest/business. Try to sell them Amway you don't have. Or just walk away. This would be a great example of why first dates should be simple.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 17
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:20:28 AM

Love this, esp. the part about the MONKEY. Goes for both genders.


I am so sorry your feet hurt. Hehehe. Great name. Up there with Pig in terms of names. Good to see you back!!!
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 18
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:21:53 AM

When people do marry, even if it is a "marriage" of personal conviction only, they ARE linking themselves to entire families and social groups


marriage?

he was talking abut a first date..

had the "coincidence" thing happen..sucked.
 MyFeetHurt
Joined: 2/22/2016
Msg: 19
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:31:08 AM

I am so sorry your feet hurt. Hehehe. Great name. Up there with Pig in terms of names. Good to see you back!!!

LoL TY- look up Mz. Luscious & her song "My Feet Hurt" on youtube- too funny!
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 20
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 7:51:22 AM
"Then at then end of the night /Date... Her male friend walked up to me and said " Thanks But she...#$%^doesn't think this is going to work out between you both"...

I could see her a few meters away and she just waved basically indicating ...Seeeyaa....!!!"







Wow, if that isn't the chickenshit move of the year I don't know what is.

You should've excused yourself as soon as you realized she wasn't alone - that is total crap.

Otherwise, it's too bad you couldn't have quickly called up a few " advisors " of your own to come join the party. The "advisors " could have judged eachother's " advisors " as well.


Did they hold up scorecards after each joke you made ? That could have been an indicator of how the date was going to end.
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 21
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Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 8:04:30 AM

I'm with IG, I would have had fun with this and been my own type of jerk. They opened the door, set the mood, so why not turn it on them. Hit on her female friend. network with the male friends for things in your hobby/passion/interest/business. Try to sell them Amway you don't have.


Not me. I would have done as Blonde Angel first suggested. "I'm outta here".
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 22
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 8:10:37 AM

Her male friend walked up to me and said " Thanks But she...#$%^doesn't think this is going to work out between you both"...


I would've said "The feeling is mutual, since she can't date without being chaperoned, like a school girl in junior high."
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 23
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 8:13:56 AM
^^^^^^ Her advisor prolly had instructions not to relay any negative comments , hence one of the many perks of having an advisor in the first place.

In fact, the advisor prolly says, regardless of what the suitor actually says , something like " he said he's devastated but understands you're way out of his league and wishes you all the best and that you're a class act all the way "
 showboatsupreme
Joined: 1/25/2016
Msg: 24
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 10:06:51 AM


" Thanks But she...#$%^doesn't think this is going to work out between you both"...


You should've responded, "You won't wear a wig, sorry."
 ndm147
Joined: 8/1/2013
Msg: 25
Impressing a Girl on a date then her Freinds / Parents...
Posted: 2/26/2016 10:32:05 AM
A friend of my daughters had never tried online dating. She was about 27 at the time. She was nervous about meeting a stranger, so she brought her sister along and the sister sat in another booth but did not participate in the meet/greet. Eventually she married the guy she met.

But your experience with the entourage she brought along for security was certainly uncalled for. It was not like she was the daughter of an ex president and has secret service agents trailing her. That was just down out rude.
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