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 nelsoncruz21
Joined: 7/11/2013
Msg: 1
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when to ask her out againPage 1 of 1    
Everyone frets about when to ask for a second date but what about a 3rd or 4th or 5th?

I have been on 3 dates within 1 1/2 with this one girl but haven't asked about a 4th date though there is interest.

Last time we went was two weeks ago. I havent asked since

Is 2 weeks to long to set something up?

there has been busy times in those two weeks

her with school and me with family health problems
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 2
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/19/2016 4:17:03 PM
the only way to know what works with her particularly is...to try it out. But then, i'm one of those who just wants an answer, so I don't play the game well.
 wineaboutit
Joined: 2/18/2016
Msg: 3
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/21/2016 5:26:55 AM
Just ask her out again instead of dragging it out. If I go out with somebody and they do not contact me for a few days or they do not ask me out on another date for two weeks, I assume they lost interest.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 4
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/21/2016 6:56:48 AM
Ask her out and arrange a time and place that's good for both of you. I would like to go out with someone at least once a week. But I understand that sometimes it can be multiple weeks between dates because 1 person is away or is going through a busy stretch in their life or there is a lack of mutual free time.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 5
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/21/2016 11:59:07 PM
Too many questions about obvious things. Work on playing things by ear with women.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 6
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 2:26:51 AM
Don't ask her out. It is her turn.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 7
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 7:25:48 AM

Don't ask her out. It is her turn.


I disagree with this statement. Many women want a man to take control. So it's the guy that innitiates the asking for the dates. Once you're more formalize then she can be the one suggesting places and venues, but that is because it's sort of understood that you would meet at some point.

What the OP needs to do is call her on the phone (no texting). See how she is doing then ask her for a date. If you date and then you droop the ball for days at the time, she is going to feel that you're dating only casually, so eventually she is going to give you the boot, unless you up the ante.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 8
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 7:32:27 AM
???? 3 dates then no contact?
??? 2 weeks have gone by, with no contact?
Am I missing something here?

LOL Just before I met my BF, several men contacted me again, either thru POF or by text, weeks/months later. They each had indicated they wanted to "keep in touch". Or, "Let's go out again, I'll call you". After 3 days I texted or left a message to each one. Their idea of "keep in touch", and my interpretation differs. One of these men texted, "I want to date you".
I responded, to each man, "I'm involved now, thanks but no thanks". To the last man I responded, "Sorry, my BF wouldn't approve."
A sample of the replies I received? "Damn!"

We see this question fairly often in the Forums, "What do I do..................?
There is no right or wrong answer, but it seems logical to me, if you are interested, if you want to see someone again, pick up the phone. ( I had the urge to use large letters, just then, but restrained myself, LOL)
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 9
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 9:56:28 AM

Many women want a man to take control.


Yes, you are right about that. Then again, you know the difference between "taking control" and pvssy begging. Most men don't. They need to draw a firm line in the sand. Hey, it's already been three times. Unless the OP is our age, this girl is too much work.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 10
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 1:15:15 PM

LOL Just before I met my BF, several men contacted me again, either thru POF or by text, weeks/months later. They each had indicated they wanted to "keep in touch". Or, "Let's go out again, I'll call you". After 3 days I texted or left a message to each one. Their idea of "keep in touch", and my interpretation differs. One of these men texted, "I want to date you".


Ding, ding, ding. This is exactly what happens.


Hey, it's already been three times. Unless the OP is our age, this girl is too much work.


I see what you're saying but I believe it's more about momentum. If you're having dates only once a week and they are non-sexual, you can drag the damn thing for a long time and end nowhere.

If you're communicating throughout the week and have a big date and a hang out, thus two dates in a week, then you can easily escalate without any problem.
One thing that always worked for me is the fact that I am an excellent cook. So by the time we're having a second or third date I am cooking, there are candles and 99.8 of the time, thing happen.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 11
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 1:44:38 PM
I will argue that women like to be lead to where they wanted to go, rather than perhaps outright controlled. maybe some weak-minded ones want to totally give up responsibility, and let a hot man make all the decisions for them (until something goes wrong and then leave and complain to everyone about how controlling the guy was). Surprise, surprise, there are a few men out there who don't mind someone taking the wheel from time to time, either. as the saying goes, lead or follow, but get out of the way.

But asking her out, shows confidence, shows a desire for her. if she wants a guy like you to desire her, then there you are.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 12
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/22/2016 2:09:19 PM

I will argue that women like to be lead to where they wanted to go, rather than perhaps outright controlled.


You're absolutely right.

You can take the lead by mentioning to her some kind of place that you like, then ask her if she likes that type of food or ambiance, then ask her if Friday or Saturday would be better for her. Give her choices, but set very specific parameters. People that screw it up are those that set the date but then tell her that they can figure out the time some other day.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 13
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when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/23/2016 1:12:39 AM
If she has not been in touch with you during those two weeks then I figure she thinks you are not interested and may have moved on. The only thing to do is to ask her out again if you want to. If you don't have time to date really then say so.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 14
when to ask her out again
Posted: 4/23/2016 9:12:01 AM
One date a week is a good starting point. Two weeks without a date is a little long. Time to ask her out on another date.
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