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 fed.up
Joined: 11/21/2008
Msg: 1
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Mutual match??Page 1 of 1    
I've recently been getting messages in my inbox from men who says we are a "Mutual Match". What does this mean? I've never expressed any interest in them from anywhere that I am aware of. I did however checked out the "Meet Me" section the other night from my iPhone and I remember just swiping through profiles without selecting the "Yes" or "No" buttons below each profile.
If I do not select a button and just swipe to the next profile, does that tag me as pressing "Yes" to every profile that I looked at??? If so, this has to be fixed because it is misleading for everyone. I am questioning some of the notifications sent to me that someone wants to meet me when, perhaps they too were just swiping through profiles themselves. If not, then why am I getting tagged that I am interested to some profiles?
 Forums_only
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 2
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/8/2016 9:08:26 PM
Considering there is virtually nothing in your profile on which to base a 'mutual match', it must be some automated thing the system is doing now.

Did you want to maybe ask in the Forum about Forum Suggestions or see if there is anything there about this? That's usually where you can find information on the technical parts of this site.

As you are posting in the Profile Review section (and a member since 2008), perhaps a review would be helpful in getting messages from someone who may actually be a better match.
 flman2015
Joined: 10/3/2015
Msg: 3
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/9/2016 1:06:33 AM


I've recently been getting messages in my inbox from men who says we are a "Mutual Match". What does this mean?


A "Mutual Match" occurs when you've clicked "yes/maybe" on a man you saw in the "Meet Me" feature and that man clicked "yes/maybe" on you.

You can see who your mutual matches are by clicking on the little icon to the left of "My Profile". The icon is barely visible and very easy to miss. When you click on it a small window titled "Alert Center" will list your matches if you have any.
 fed.up
Joined: 11/21/2008
Msg: 4
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Mutual match??
Posted: 5/9/2016 3:20:53 PM
Right, but my question is if it may be tagging me as if I had clicked on a "Yes" or "Maybe" because I never clicked on any buttons. I just swiped through profiles never having clicked on any buttons and I've been receiving messages from people who said we were a mutual match. I think the system is misleading if by swiping profiles means that I have been tagged to those profiles as having clicked on "Yes" or "Maybe". I am sure I am not the only one that doesn't click on a button.
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 5
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/9/2016 3:36:43 PM
This isn't tinder and there's no swiping involved.
You have to click yes, no, or maybe in order to move on to the next profile in "Meet Me".
It's meaningless anyway, so why does it concern you so much?
 tennistown
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 6
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/9/2016 3:56:19 PM

Posted By: fed.up
I've recently been getting messages in my inbox from men who says we are a "Mutual Match".




It is entirely possible
these men are also "fed up."
That sounds like a match to me.
 fed.up
Joined: 11/21/2008
Msg: 7
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Mutual match??
Posted: 5/9/2016 6:16:38 PM
I just dont want to be misleading, or be mislead. I did swipe and did not click on a button. I'm simply pointing out a potential bug in the system if there is one. I know now to never post a question on here without being criticized.
 LAEPF
Joined: 3/18/2016
Msg: 8
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/12/2016 8:57:14 AM
IMO the 'matches' etc., are worthless. I can't click on their profiles anyway because I'm not an upgraded member and I think you can still have success here without paying.

I've realized I've gotta have pretty thick skin for on line dating. I've only been here about 2 months and I could start a comedy blog about the downright rude, critical and condescending (and completely illiterate) men who have messaged me. The profile review is nothing compared to that. Let it go. We all want to say we are fed up at times, we just don't. That implies we'd be giving up, resentfully.

Leslie:)

PS: I done outside research about online dating and have combed through the forums. Nothing has been more helpful than the profile review section. Plus, it gives me a chance to help others who are struggling.
 Scaretale
Joined: 1/9/2016
Msg: 9
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Mutual match??
Posted: 5/12/2016 9:10:39 AM
Attracting people through profiles and messages is the EASY part!

The hard part is dealing with all the flaky people who don't know how to communicate except 8 word texts...or people who don't know how to hold up their end of a conversation...or people who can't keep their attention because there are 10,000 other people on this site....and then you finally meet, and there's just zero chemistry there...and it's back to square one.

You do meet a whole lot of people with PoF, but yes, it can be exhausting. Thank god for Rumplemintz in the freezer.
 LAEPF
Joined: 3/18/2016
Msg: 10
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/14/2016 10:24:16 AM
...or honey-butter-cinnamon-roasted-peanut popcorn at 2AM.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 11
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Mutual match??
Posted: 5/15/2016 3:59:21 PM

I've recently been getting messages in my inbox from men who says we are a "Mutual Match". What does this mean?

Should be pretty obvious. It's a Mutual Yes/Maybe match in the Meet Me section. Maybe is treated like Yes. Maybe is on the actual website, not on the phone app, tho.

from my iPhone and I remember just swiping through profiles without selecting the "Yes" or "No" buttons below each profile.

Swiping *is* saying Yes or No. You can't skip. You must answer. If you swipe Left, it shows moving the picture with a Red X (=No). If you swipe Right, it shows moving the picture with a Green Check (=Yes).

This should be pretty obvious, right? :)
 wolftxusa66
Joined: 12/17/2014
Msg: 12
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Mutual match??
Posted: 6/14/2016 10:39:51 PM
Just when you think the swiping mechanism is foolproof, a better fool comes along...

Your profile is negative! From your screen name to all the things you don't do. "Good with the bad"? List some good. And you talk about dating as "wasting time"? Are you really tying to find someone?

I'd toss about everything and start over. Maybe the first sentence can stay.

Wolfgang
 alwayzsmiln
Joined: 11/18/2016
Msg: 13
Mutual match??
Posted: 4/30/2017 11:40:05 AM
When you swipe, depending which way you are swiping, you are either saying yes or no in the "meet me" screen.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 14
Mutual match??
Posted: 4/30/2017 12:25:49 PM

I've recently been getting messages in my inbox from men who says we are a "Mutual Match". What does this mean?


It means you are now part of an arranged marriage.

Mazel tov !
 flyover_boy
Joined: 12/28/2016
Msg: 15
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Mutual match??
Posted: 5/1/2017 9:53:29 AM

Your profile is negative! From your screen name to all the things you don't do. "Good with the bad"? List some good. And you talk about dating as "wasting time"? Are you really tying to find someone?


Often ‘Mutual Match’ is you both hit ‘yes’ OR ‘maybe’ on meet me. But, one of you definitely didn’t hit ‘no.’ It is also possible he may be ‘matched’ with you. And, on POF, the ‘matches’ are whatever. But, think of it this way, privately and to yourself. In your life...haven’t you liked someone who didn’t like you ? And, a computer didn’t match you up that way. I think people tend to harbor a belief that a match is someone they will fall head over heels for AND that feeling will be returned. Were it so simple, my friend.

I do echo a little, your tone does smell a little pretentious to me, from the profile and all. However, I have seen MUUUCH worse. The other day, one profile read, ‘Yeah, I’m know I’m beautiful...’ and after caps stating ‘Read my profile carefully before you dare email me,’ went on with a list of demands. Sure, fine dinning and global trips were just part of the package.

I do get some of the humor in your profile text, but I’m not a fan of humor in text. For me, it’s best served through the delivery. You may be great at that part, and yet, reading this, it’s all lost. Save that for the coffee date...or****ails or whatever. Be a little more inviting in your profile...more the ‘Hi...(here’s who I am), (some things I like/do).’ Short and sweet, don’t have to be flowery.

And, for ‘unwanted attention,’ that’s part of online dating for everyone. Don’t bother to get into a discussion/argument with someone. Believe me, guys get it too. Takes just seconds a day to ‘delete/block,’ works every time.
 scm600
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 16
Mutual match??
Posted: 5/21/2017 6:49:38 AM
I've wondered the same thing. I've never even used the 'meet me' feature or anything related to it. All I've ever done is view profiles. I think it's just a way to try to bait you into being a paying customer.

And, yeah, I quit posting on the forums some time ago. I tried it for a short time and found, while there are some good people here, a good many are just plain rude and condescending and seem to delight in antagonizing others for pleasure. The only reason I'm here now is that it's a slow morning and I've been curious about what triggers this thing. So I googled and wound up here. I see things haven't changed much.

The best of luck to the original poster!
 Gentleman_suitor777
Joined: 6/15/2017
Msg: 17
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Mutual match??
Posted: 7/23/2017 8:16:21 PM
She was already betrothed by her father to Lazar Wolf.
 OneInAQuadrillion
Joined: 10/1/2017
Msg: 18
Mutual match??
Posted: 10/22/2017 11:35:56 AM
The screen name fed.up is unattractive. Change it.
The headline looks like 12 years old, not 42. A smiley? You can do better than that.

All 4 of your pics are old and have the POF logo on them. You need to post up-to-date pics.

You need to complete the Needs Test.

This is a red flag: Do you want children? Undecided/Open. Choose yes or no if you are going to have kids or not.

Delete this sentence that shows immaturity.
"I will not waste my time on somebody who will not waste his time on me."
Delete it.

Do you really have a Bachelors Degree? Your profile is written like a high-schooler.
 patrick429
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 19
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Mutual match??
Posted: 3/10/2018 9:55:01 PM
I have a mutual match an I’m tryin to find her but I can’t afford upgrade at the moment, how can I see who she is? I sent her a message but it didn’t send an then it clearded from the box at the top of screen as well. Please help
 ZombieTodd
Joined: 2/28/2018
Msg: 20
Mutual match??
Posted: 3/18/2018 12:05:07 AM

fed.up: :o)


The username is jaded and salty. The headline is juvenile. Just quit POF. You don't deserve a date.

Pics are so old they have the Plenty Of Fish logo on them. You need all new pics.


Needs Test Not Completed
Incomplete profile.


Do you want children? Undecided/Open

Red flag!

Interests section is blank. Why are you so boring?
 Nyeahsers
Joined: 12/7/2017
Msg: 21
Mutual match??
Posted: 3/18/2018 11:30:44 AM
"Needs Test Not Completed"
"Incomplete profile."

POF tests are inaccurate and, therefore, deceiving.


Do you want children? "Undecided/Open"
"Red flag!"

The majority of profiles say Undecided/Open. How is that a red flag? If someone says yes, everyone who does not want kids will see that answer as a red flag. If you say no, everyone who wants kids will see that as a red flag. Undecided would be a yellow flag to me but Open may very well be exactly as I have presented it in all my past profiles, open. Most of us have a hard enough time just finding someone for a long term relationship to even think about having children. This is a decision that I will be making with my partner, if I ever find one. I think a lot of people think this way. I'm not missing out on the love of my life because I made plans for our future long before meeting her.
 ZombieTodd
Joined: 2/28/2018
Msg: 22
Mutual match??
Posted: 3/18/2018 10:51:35 PM
Don't want to participate in POF? Kick rocks lady!
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