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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Is it childish to block someone?      Home login  
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 Izanyonehome
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 1
Is it childish to block someone?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Maybe I am simply unclear of the reason and workings of that feature. Or is it just par for the course for a great many Forum participants? What exactly does it accomplish and are there folks that don't have any need for it for whatever reason? I worry that I might be missing something.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 2
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/1/2016 7:26:35 PM
izanyonehome- Clarify what you mean by blocking.
Are you talking about blocking someone from contacting you on your profile?
Or, do you mean when people post on the forums and then disappear?
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 3
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/1/2016 9:11:56 PM
I have four people on block, one for attacking emails about what is in my profile that is none of her business, and three men, one happened last night, because they are spamming or won't stop emailing. Personally I don't feel any need to explain myself very often, and some here will say things along that lines that if you block others something is wrong with you LOL but to each his own. I say block if you do not want someone contacting you again, otherwise just wait for it to go away on it's own or delete it. I also do not answer the door when I don't feel like it and I hardly ever answer my phone unless it's family or I'm waiting for a call.

Oh I should have read bama's first. I didn't know you could block other members' posts, so you don't see them. I've seen that on other sites but not here. I have done that elsewhere a few times but they have to be really stupid before I do because I like to read the good and the bad and the indifferent.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 4
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/2/2016 12:04:04 AM
daynadaze- I don't know how people are getting "voted off" or blocked, or whatever you want to call it.
I thought the mods were gone, but people still keep being blocked from the forums, who is doing it remains a mystery, at least to me.
I don't blame you for blocking people from your page.
I've done it too.
No one has to put up with disrespect or some whack job with an agenda.
The only thing I've participated in on the forums is when people are nominated for a thread deletion. I've voted a few times for a thread to be deleted.
Usually for redundant threads and some for attention seeking.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 5
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:25:45 AM
You may get a 15 yard penalty.
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 6
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/2/2016 2:44:44 PM
This is a good post. Good question.

It is rare--- but anyone who writes an inappropriate message to me is blocked. I teach school and want respect. Certain subjects are not proper to be sent via email and when this happens, I block the sender.

Your tolerance may be different than mine. Only you can answer whether you are missing something.

I want to miss bad behavior.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 7
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/3/2016 2:04:58 PM

I teach school and want respect.

But when one retires from teaching -- screw that respect stuff -- that'll be for the birds! ;)

Certain subjects are not proper to be sent via email and when this happens

1. You don't use your work email as your personal email do you? That'd be ill-advised...
2. You don't get whole messages displayed in email via POF, do you? You can at least turn that off if that even is an option, as I only get alerts that someone wrote me.

I want to miss bad behavior.

Don't worry, you can just strictly use eHarmony for a while. After a while, you'll dearly miss the bad behavior of incoming messages from other places. :)
 BeyondtheMatrix
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 8
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/4/2016 12:48:23 PM

I want to miss bad behaviour.


Bad behaviour? You mean calling people names? Nah-nah-nah kind of thing? Being 'rude?' Is that what you mean by bad behaviour?

What about your government, and mine? What about their bad behaviour? For instance, the situation in America now is so bad, so out of control -- I'm not talking about their $19 trillion debt -- they are now paying career criminals not to commit crimes, and using the public's money to fund that insanity. Is that bad behaviour, or is that brushed aside while we focus on PoF and the 'rudeness' here and all the pettiness that political correctness magnifies to the size of mountains?

Bad behaviour. How about when a government, for example mine, a group of individuals who are paid by the people, the taxpayers, a government that sends billions of hard-earned taxpayer dollars to Pacific countries in the form of aid, while our own people are dying on the hospital waiting lists? This is an established fact. Britain, for example, sends billions of pounds in aid to India. Meanwhile, India has the third finest space programme in the world. Many leading astronomers around the world have praised their endeavours. Billions of pounds in aid = a world-class space programme? It doesn't add up. Isn't it time we stopped this criminally 'bad behaviour,' of wasting the public's hard-earned money?

Is that bad behaviour? Or are we just back to the petty nah-nah-nah thing on PoF, where we live in the dream world and pontificate about how wonderful and 'beautiful' we are, and get others to support that cyberspace belief?

I mean, isn't it time we woke up? Truly. The amount of bad behaviour around us is staggering. It is out of control. It is beyond our capacity to clean it up. And here we are talking about why we block or not block someone. It doesn't matter. What does matter is the bad behaviour of those who are not held to account and who tell us what to do every day of our lives in this so-called democracy. I hear, for example, that Canada, the Left's PC brigade, are trying to get more and more rules and regulations and laws installed so that children in playgrounds cannot call each other names or 'offend' their fellow-pupils' sensitivities, and that appropriate fines, on an appropriate scale, will be in place. Hard to believe, eh? We've come a long way from my school days. I remember once, a very traumatic experience by a teacher:

As an only child, I had to look after my sick mother. My father was away at sea. I was about ten years old at the time when this happened. My mother was a dreadfully sick woman. She coughed 24/7. Her lungs were knackered and she spat sputum into a container all night. She had more pills around her bed than you could shake a stick at, as well as her oxygen bottle for emergencies. I washed her, bathed her, fed her, carried her from the bed to the bathroom, to the living room, if she was up to it, and back to her bed. One morning I was so shattered after being up all night, making endless cups of hot tea, I could hardly stand upright. I remember belting out of the front door with my schoolbag over my shoulder, wondering if I would make it for the nine o'clock bell. It was a freezing cold winter morning, and I was just climbing to the top of the hill that separates us from the valley below, where our school was. I heard the bell. I panicked. I crapped myself. I mean, literally. I was in a bad way. Anyway, I ran, fell, tumbled and skidded down that icy hill to the school gate, whereupon I flew up the steps to the classroom door. It was one of those doors with a pane of glass. I knocked on the door. The teacher, My Mohammed Choudhery (I can still remember his name after 50 years) frowned through the glass at me. He yanked the door open. "Well?" I then replied, in my meek and mild manner: "I'm sorry, sir, but my mother . . . " He dragged me in before the class, and said: "Too bad. Thees ees belting day." He stood me up against the wall near the radiator and slammed his leather belt into my freezing cold hands, almost white with the cold, six shocking times. I almost dropped with the pain. Tell me, good people here on Plenty of Fish, the land of non-judgementalism, was that 'bad behaviour?' Because if it was, nothing was done about it.

Sincerely
- Peter
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 9
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/4/2016 1:02:10 PM
Peter, Love, are you sure nothing was done about it? I heard a rumour that corporal punishment in schools is being banned here and there ;)
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 10
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/5/2016 7:57:57 PM
Blocking is as any human action is. The action isn't what is, or isn't "childish." The REASON for the action is what is or isn't "childish" or perhaps one might say instead, generally respected by fellow adults.

So far as I know, there's no way for the average member to "block" people from posting in the forums, only to block them from contacting you through the site.

My own judgment, for what it's worth, is that blocking someone because you want to snub them, would be "childish." Blocking someone because they are assaulting you verbally, and wont behave respectfully despite asking them to do so, would be quite adult.

If someone tries to guilt-trip you in to allowing them to abuse you, ignore their nonsense, and hit the button.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 11
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/6/2016 1:07:01 PM
OP ...I think blocking someone is useful especially when a person sends others unsolicited emails or in earlier times ... unsolicited IM's.

Message 4 ...
No one has to put up with disrespect or some whack job with an agenda.

How many people in here have received emails from users who critique your profile and say some really nasty things? I mean, they say some really bizarre things ... just comes from nowhere? Seriously ... what is that all about? That's a good time to use the "block" feature.

I used to get some really weird (pornographic) IM messages in here ... good time to use the "block" feature.
 BeyondtheMatrix
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 12
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/6/2016 3:31:15 PM

Peter, Love, are you sure nothing was done about it?


Thanks, Whatsamattababy.

This was a little more than 50 years ago. What I forgot to mention was that I had never been late before. So when Mr Coudhery said: "Too bad. This is belting day," it wasn't as if he was sick to the back teeth with me. He was just pissed off with his life, so he took it out on me. I didn't mention this episode to my mother, my father being away at sea, because she would have raised Cain. She would have carried her oxygen cylinder on her back and crawled to that school and gave that man a hiding. She would have swung for him. He wouldn't have assaulted anyone else again in his life time. My mother was a very strong woman, but her lungs were shot through. She was a determined soul, full of decency, compassion, and helpfulness -- but without a shred of political correctness. She called a spade a spade. We don't have that today. We have an entirely different world today.

Mr Choudhery? Something else happened a few months later. One of my classmates wrote on the blackboard that "Choudhery is a ---- " I won't spell it out, but it rhyhms with the smallest and weakest member of an animal's litter. I think you get my drift. Anyway, Mr Stone, the mathematics teacher, heard about this, and he wasn't best pleased. He did a 'test.' He got everyone to write this out in their exercise jotters. Mr Stone then came down, aisle by aisle, and studied each pupil's writing. He came to me and looked down at my exercise jotter, and he gave me a strange look. I found out later that, ironically, I had been the only person who was able to spell Mr Choudhery's surname. I find that . . . interesting. Anyway, Mr Choudhery wanted everyone belted, to make sure that the culprit was caught. Mr Stone was having none of it. I don't think the culprit was ever caught.

But this is only a tiny fraction of an atom of a particle of an example of what we had to endure in our school days. We're not talking about the brutally cruel Magdalene Laundries in Ireland here, we're talking about a state school in Glasgow in the Sixties, a primary school that's supposed to employ teachers who want the best for their pupils. It was a long way from Mr Keating in Dead Poets' Society, I can assure you.

I look back on my early days with more than a modicum of bitterness. The injustices, the craziness of it all, still leave a sharply bitter taste in my mouth. My ideal teacher would be Miss Jean Brodie, the fictional character from the pen of the late Miss Muriel Spark. Apparently, this brilliant and original teacher was based on one of her own teachers more than 70 years ago. I doubt if it was Mr Choudhery.

Sincerely
-Peter
 BeyondtheMatrix
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 13
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/6/2016 3:39:59 PM

How many people in here have received emails from users who critique your profile and say some really nasty things? I mean, they say some really bizarre things ... just comes from nowhere? Seriously ... what is that all about? That's a good time to use the "block" feature.


Hi Cotter.

I don't get many emails, apart from the usual two or three scam messages each day, which are easily identifiable and increasing, but I got a 'legitimate' message yesterday. Wow. Start the band playing, turn up the lights, bring out the popcorn . . . Alas, it was from a young woman here in New Zealand, an 'educator,' a 'teacher' of young children, who assured me that my profile needed changing if I wanted to find a woman. She wrote: "Allow me to give you some advise [sic] . . . " It went on about how 'bad' I am and how my profile is not up to speed and how great she is. I looked at her profile, this teacher, and it was crammed with errors of one kind and another. On top of that, her profile said that she was looking only for 'Friends,' yet her description at the top of her profile said she was 'looking for a long-term commitment', etc. I wrote back and gave her a piece of my mind and then blocked her. I don't care who calls it childish. If it was childish PoF wouldn't have supplied this function/feature to its members. I think it's the spam/scammers that are really getting to me here. They say the same old thing, making the same old mistakes -- one of which is monumental, but I won't mention it here -- and the photographs are always 'perfect,' from perfect angles, almost mathematical. I feel sorry for the men and women whose photographs are being lifted and copied and used by honest, decent PoF users. It's a pity there is no way to protect your photographs here.

Thanks, Cotter.

- Peter
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 14
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/6/2016 8:00:02 PM
Post # 8, what a sad story you told there of your childhood and how Mr Choudhery gave you a belting. After you had an accidental BM in your pants and were racing for the bell to start school.... But, it could have been worse.

What if, instead of belting your hands Mr Choudhery chose to pull down your britches and give your poor bare BM bestained bottom a belting in front of the whole class? Could you imagine how much a memory like that would be haunting you now? And, the story you'd be telling here for all to read.

And, at risk of sounding childish I sometimes think having a block button for dreadful memories would be a plus. But, I've never used the block button here on good old POF.
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 15
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/6/2016 8:28:21 PM
^ What? Those are the strangest words of comfort I've ever seen. Must be one of those newfangled therapeutic approaches. Wait a minute... You're not a Therapist - you're a Teacher!
 BeyondtheMatrix
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 16
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 1:43:12 AM

^What? Those are the strangest words of comfort I've ever seen. Must be one of those newfangled therapeutic approaches. Wait a minute... You're not a therapist - you're a teacher!


At least Doremi Fasolatido didn't 'attack' me, Whatsamattababy. Attacking people seems to be the currency on sites like these. And he has a point. Mr Choudhery could have taken my trousers down and belted my backside. It wouldn't have been pretty. Can you imagine the shame? Oh my God. I would have been the laughing stock for generations to come.

I remember being at the top of the hill, freezing, and hearing the school bell. I could have gone home at that point. Alas, I got a belting for my troubles. I think Mr Choudhery got the boot himself. I'm not sure. But 'something' happened. It was so long ago, more than five decades ago. He was an angry individual, with a penchant for humiliating pupils. He never used our first names, always our surnames.

My favourite teacher was Mrs Hunter, from the Outer Hebrides. Believe it or not, she was the tallest person in the school, towering even over our headmaster. She was a real Amazon. She wore the black cloak and walked with pure grace. Everything she did was done with grace. I remember one afternoon, a free period, and she asked if we woud like to have a quiz of some sort. She opened her arms and hands and invited the class to ask her questions. I said: "Mrs Hunter, how many Muses were there in Greek mythology?" She swept up the aisle, her face radiating pure fascination, and replied: "There were nine, Peter. Do you want me to name them?" Embarrassed, I looked around the class. We all nodded eagerly. She named them, starting with Calliope and ending with Urania. What a woman she was. I remember her perfume on my school exercise jotter. She had marked something with a red pen, being 'wrong,' but the fragrance of her perfume anaesthetized all that. You know, it's a pity that we have to die. I mean, the knowledge and wisdom and understanding that woman had, all the life experience, where does it go? Where does her energy go? Where does her Soul go? Does she become someone else? There are many famous people who believe in reincarnation.

Benjamin Franklin had a belief in reincarnation. He wrote: "When I see nothing annihilated (in the works of God) and not a drop of water wasted, I cannot suspect the annihilation of souls, or believe that He will suffer the daily waste of millions of minds ready made that now exist, and put Himself to the continual trouble of making new ones. Thus, finding myself to exist in the world, I believe I shall, in some shape or other, always exist; and, with all the inconveniences human life is liable to, I shall not object to a new edition of mine, hoping, however, that the errata of the last may be corrected." In other words, he hopes that when he comes back he will be a better version of himself.

The American industrialist and founder of the Ford Motor Company, Henry Ford, also believed that we return after we have 'died.' He wrote: "I adopted the theory of Reincarnation when I was twenty-six. Religion offered nothing to the point. Even work could not give me complete satisfaction. Work is futile if we cannot utilize the experience we collect in one life in the next. When I discovered Reincarnation it was as if I had found a universal plan I realized that there was a chance to work out my ideas. Time was no longer limited. I was no longer a slave to the hands of the clock. Genius is experience. Some seem to think that it is a gift or talent, but it is the fruit of long experience in many lives. Some are older souls than others, and so they know more. The discovery of Reincarnation put my mind at ease. If you preserve a record of this conversation, write it so that it puts men's minds at ease. I would like to communicate to others the calmness that the long view of life gives to us." It's clear that Henry Ford found more fulfilment in the theory of reincarnation than he found through orthodox religion.

The famous American writer Jack London also believed that we come back in some shape or form. "I did not begin when I was born, nor when I was conceived. I have been growing, developing, through incalculable myriads of millenniums. All my previous selves have their voices, echoes, promptings in me. Oh, incalculable times again shall I be born." This he wrote in The Star Rover, one of his novels, which I have among my books.

Even Julius Caesar had something to say on reincarnation. "The Celts were fearless warriors because they wish to inculcate this as one of their leading tenets, that souls do not become extinct, but pass after death from one body to another." He is quite clear about his belief. From one body to another. I like that.

French literary giant Honore Balzac wrote: "The virtues we acquire, which develop slowly within us, are the invisible links that bind each one of our existences to the others - existences which the spirit alone remembers, for Matter has no memory for spiritual things." How beautiful and profound. Typical of Balzac.

And the great, the one and only, the giant of American literature, Ralph Waldo Emerson, said: "The soul comes from without into the human body, as into a temporary abode, and it goes out of it anew it passes into other habitations, for the soul is immortal. It is the secret of the world that all things subsist and do not die, but only retire a little from sight and afterwards return again. Nothing is dead; men feign themselves dead, and endure mock funerals… and there they stand looking out of the window, sound and well, in some strange new disguise." What a thinker Emerson was. And what a marvellous way of putting his beliefs.

Let me close with a quote from my favourite author, the great English poet William Wordsworth. His understanding of reincarnation is simply out of this world. He wrote:

Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting/The Soul that rises with us,
our life's Star, Hath had elsewhere its setting/And cometh from afar."


Food for thought.

Or food for worms, to quote Mr Keating in Dead Poets' Society.

Sincerely
- Peter
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 17
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 5:39:35 AM
Well Mr Matrix. I was only trying to make you see that things could always be worse, and that it's best to look on the bright side of life. After hearing of your childhood school experiences it makes me wonder if the Marquis De Sade had founded some charter schools I've never heard of.
 Cowgirlwannabe1
Joined: 8/21/2015
Msg: 18
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 5:55:03 AM
is it childish? not if what they are saying is abusive or offensive and you have already told them so
 BeyondtheMatrix
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 19
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 11:51:59 AM

Well Mr Matrix. I was only trying to make you see that things could always be worse, and that it's best to look on the bright side of life. After hearing of your childhood school experiences it makes me wonder if the Marquis de Sade had founded some charter schools I've never heard of.


I like it. That brings a smile to my face.

I think Mr Choudhery was the only bad experience of my childhood, apart from the usual tribulations that children go through at school. Most of the teachers were superb, but Mr Choudhery? Well, as Oscar Wilde said: "I don't usually forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception."

Thanks, Mr Fasolatido. Best wishes
- Peter
 Red_Fish_Blonde_Fish
Joined: 6/3/2016
Msg: 20
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 5:36:55 PM

Are you talking about blocking someone from contacting you on your profile?
Or, do you mean when people post on the forums and then disappear?


It is not immature to block someone who emails you & annoys or disrespects you. The feature was put there for a reason.

As far as the forums nonsense, yes it is very petty & immature. Some have gotten nuked many times w/o any forum violation & others have stated openly that they "nuke" people just because they do not like them.

That's pathetic & reflects on the nukers not the nukees...

A few months ago, I got a private email from a former forums regular. Hasn't been here in years. But she lurks & reads. She explained the pattern her & others saw, b4 & after moderators came & left.

A psychologist/psychiatrist would have a field day w/ such behavior.
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 21
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/7/2016 5:40:42 PM
^^^^^^Wholeheartedly agree! :)
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 22
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/8/2016 5:29:29 PM
Why bother to bust someone in a lie ... just don't write back!

I have no tolerance for liars ... so if I find out someone is lying I just don't write back. Why waste time on an email to someone you want nothing to do with anyways?
 NotGorshkovAgain
Joined: 4/29/2009
Msg: 23
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Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/8/2016 6:52:15 PM
In all western democracies, people have a right to speak their mind. What people do NOT have, however, is a right to be listened to.

It doesn't matter why I don't want to speak to somebody. Maybe I don't like their politics. Maybe I think they pick their nose. Maybe they remind me of the bull terrier that bit me when I was 6. DOESN'T MATTER.

Who I do or do not want to talk to can be as arbitrary as I see fit, or can have a thesis worth of logical arguments behind it. DOESN'T MATTER.

What *is* childish, however, is somebody who wines or complains that somebody else doesn't want to talk to them.
 memtoo
Joined: 6/2/2016
Msg: 24
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/9/2016 8:56:53 AM
Speaking of which, what happened to bamagrl68? She was here since 2010 and now her profile is terminated? Makes no sense.
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 25
Is it childish to block someone?
Posted: 6/9/2016 6:10:48 PM
She contacted me and asked me.to pass the word that she's back with a new user name and will be participating once her three day probation period passes.

I'm not going to say who she blames because I've seen how those accusations and counter accusations can get very weird, very fast.
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