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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Can't get any responses to my e-mails      Home login  
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 Hiboux2271
Joined: 2/3/2017
Msg: 1
Can't get any responses to my e-mailsPage 1 of 1    
Here is an example of an e-mail I sent and I realize that woman get tons of e-mails but I can't seem to get any response at all from woman.


Happy Valentines Day!

I hope you had a great day. You have a amazing smile. It seems like we have a few things in common and we are looking for similar things in a partner. Where is your favorite spot to ski?

Say hello if you would like to chat and learn more.
 VikingHoosier
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 2
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 5:52:17 PM
Bad message.

First two sentences generic and pointless, and she might not read your message that night.

Saying they have a good smile is lame.

Asking about an interest in their profile is what many guys apparently do. Answering such questions can be a chore.

Suggesting they answer is pointless.
 Hiboux2271
Joined: 2/3/2017
Msg: 3
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 6:00:01 PM
Okay what is a better starting e-mail? Other than Hi! or Hey!
 sticchic
Joined: 11/23/2014
Msg: 4
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 6:08:18 PM
TOO MUCH!!

It is the messages you are sending. If it's verbose most people will think it's a cut-paste. Write something simple. One short sentence. --- like that with 3 words.

Nice photos
Love your dog (cat, emu)! --- Choose one!
Great smile


Let them reply, or not. If they write one word, you write one word. If they write five words, you write 5 or less words. Get it?

Do not write MORE! If they are terse, move on.

DON'T TELL PEOPLE WHAT TO DO: THEY KNOW!!!
 Hiboux2271
Joined: 2/3/2017
Msg: 5
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 6:13:10 PM
Thank you. I just thought that woman wanted more.
 sticchic
Joined: 11/23/2014
Msg: 6
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 6:30:31 PM
If they are interested THEN they want more. On the first message, NO!

People who write profiles talking about having mental illness, medical conditions, unresolved issues: HELL NO! Not saying you have or had that on your intro: it's an example of what some profiles have.

Don't do what you think women want: it's called PANDERING. Not gonna work!

If they don't respond, or are holophrastic (expressing a complex of ideas in a single word or in a fixed phrase); monolexical; Monoverbal, means they are not interested.
 Hiboux2271
Joined: 2/3/2017
Msg: 7
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 6:49:17 PM
Thank you. I will give it a try and see how it goes.
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 8
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/15/2017 10:54:32 PM
Maybe if you didn't dress like it was 1962. Or maybe if ALL of your photos were beard-less instead of only one.
Gals don't like the bait-and-switch
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/1/2015
Msg: 9
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 2:32:44 AM
Do a forum thread search (on the main forum page) for terms like "first message" or "first messages". There are many threads with lots of useful suggestions that might help you.

Most women don't like getting three word messages. Have a read through the forums and try a couple of different approaches until you find the one that works for you.

Also, consider seeking a profile review in the Profile Review Forum. I haven't looked at your profile but it can't hurt to seek feedback.
 Hiboux2271
Joined: 2/3/2017
Msg: 10
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 5:13:10 AM
Made changes to my profile picture and removed the one with a beard. Anything else?
 IMayBeCrazy_But
Joined: 12/28/2016
Msg: 11
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 8:38:14 AM
Relax.

You've just begun with POF. It gets worse

Try: Hi! Seems like we have a few things in common, would you care to chat?

She'll check out your profile and decide whether or not to respond back. Try not to take anything too personally.

Good Luck!
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/1/2015
Msg: 12
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 2:05:35 PM

Anything else?
You are only allowed to seek profile assistance in the Profile Review Forum. Also, a few of the really good reviewers only check in that forum for profile review requests so it's the place to go to get the widest range of advice.
 PollyR107
Joined: 4/8/2016
Msg: 13
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 3:29:55 PM
I don't see anything wrong with your intro message or profile.

Whether you're gonna get a response from the girls you message, it's not for anyone to predict. Having no reply doesn't reflect on you personally. It means that the recipient of you message just doesn't feel the compatibility for whatever reasons.

One has to keep trying esp. on a site like this.

Best of luck.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 14
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 5:59:26 PM

I just thought that woman wanted more.


Oh, they do.
They really do.

But that's a whole other story.

I used to write longer messages than yours.

And I got lots of responses.

But that was years ago.

During the glory days of OLD.

It's a bigger crapshoot now than ever before.

Best of luck.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 15
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 7:02:55 PM
Try writing messages sideways or upside down, since the so-called experts say your profile has to stand out from the other 50 trillion messages women get daily or every minute.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 16
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/16/2017 8:32:49 PM

Try: Hi! Seems like we have a few things in common, would you care to chat?

Ugh. Guys send these spam emails all. the. time.

If the EXACT same message, without changing a word, can be sent to more than the recipient, then it is SPAM.

If you're going to try this approach then you MUST name at least one thing you have in common to show that you actually read her profile.
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 17
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/19/2017 1:10:20 AM
^^^ Spot On. Junk the templates, the form letters, the lame appeals to "things we have in common", the cyber-gifts, the photo-requirements, everything you've ever heard about adhering to some kind of "standard" of introduction.

1) Be yourself
2) You want a Friend? BE A FRIEND.

If you score a date and manage to make a steady routine of it, how will you be talking to this person in a couple of months? Will you still be ASKING PERMISSION TO ASK dippy questions that lead nowhere? Will you give clear, concise instructions on how to meet on weekends? Will you unload about how your day went or the BIG event of the week?

I say SKIP the preliminaries and start talking to people like you ALREADY know them, y'know...like FRIENDS. If you called/texted/emailed a friend about your day today, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY? That's what your email should be.
---------------
I had 2 plans of action today - get the branch saw and cut a bunch of limbs off a tree in the front yard; click a link in a business email and deal with whatever the heck it brought up - knowing it was probably going to eat an hour of my day.

When I got up, it was raining. It was raining all night. I know, because I was up half the night watching some TV shows that I'd missed during the week, playing catch-up. So was I going to go out in the rain to hack on a tree? Yup. I'd already decided to do it. Actually, it turned out to be a pretty easy job. What I didn't plan on was getting my wheelbarrow from the side of the house and pumping up the tire so I could wheel 4 loads of cuttings to the back. The wheel was a muddy mess. I didn't want to touch it. But I was happy the use it because it saved a lot of time moving stuff.

So after the yard work, I pulled up the email link. Yeah, it was some questionaire thingy like I expected, and yeah, it took over a friggin' hour to finish. Again, not complicated, but time-consuming when I'd rather put on the latest episode of The Walking Dead. So I broke the chore into two segments and watched my show, too.

Glad I cut the tree early, because the rain started pouring harder later in the day. I'm just glad I followed through on my plan for the day. Tomorrow's plan? I dunno yet. Maybe I'll mow the grass if the sun stays out. Or maybe I'll watch Ghostbusters.

Take care!
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 18
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/19/2017 5:53:59 AM
^^Exactly!

These are the type of email that I will respond to 100% of the time. They don't have to be as long or as detailed but what sets it apart is it is like we're already in conversation with a FRIEND.

All those emails like 'we have x in common, let's chat' (statement, no question) are like "Conversation for Preschoolers".
The emails like 'I see you like x, have you ever heard of y?' (statement, plus question) are like "Conversation for Middleschoolers".
Emails like aintnodeal posted are "Conversation; the Advanced Class" because they start a conversation that provide lots of openings for the other to advance the conversation by either continuing along the same line or taking it off in another direction (a) business email - ugh, b) what show was good enough to lose sleep over? or yah, I marathon watched x last weekend to avoid doing y c) do you have a lot of trees to deal with? My yard has almost no trees so I ..., d) my neighbor is the Lead Sound Engineer for Walking Dead! what a coincidence! e) I saw Ghostbusters when it first came out and it made me think ....
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 19
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/19/2017 1:00:56 PM
^^And that's the kind of response I'd like to read. Someone who knows how to take the ball and run with it. Someone who can connect all 7 levels of separation and find common bonds. Someone who will pull up the obtuse, the obscure, the oblongata, and engage your mind and spirit with the POTENTIAL of enhancing your life's experiences.

And today I learned women may not want to hear about business emails.... :)
 PennyAnte
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 20
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Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/19/2017 3:58:50 PM
The man I still date I met here in 2008. I would not have responded to him because he is 17 years younger than me... but he wrote me a poem and it was awesome. At that time I was new here and I was younger and more attractive. I was getting a lot of mail ( no brag, just fact) about 80 a day.... any way his poem stood out and got my attention.

Fishy, fishy, in a brook
Daddy caught him with a hook
Mommy fried him in a pan
And baby ate him like a man.

Fishy, fishy in the brook,
Papa catch him by the hook,
Mommy fry him in the pan
Georgie eat him fast’s can

Fishy, Fishy,
Come bite my hook;
I’ll go captain
And you’ll go cook.

Nine years later I still remember it. I thought he wrote it but it turns out it was an old English nursery rhyme and he had read in my profile that I was a Kindergarten teacher. His approach was sweet...but what kept me interested was his fine looks and darling personality. You just have to stand out. Be creative. Be yourself. Take a risk. Try humor. Woman love a man that can make them laugh.

Good luck... you have only been here a short time. It may not get easier but try to have some fun with this online experience. Don't struggle, dance!!

PS. EDIT: Yes, Please take the suggestion to go to profile review. There are lovely people there that are willing to help you with your presentation and sales pitch. They can give you positive suggestions that will make your profile more attractive.
 LucilleDixon
Joined: 12/18/2016
Msg: 21
Can't get any responses to my e-mails
Posted: 2/19/2017 8:19:30 PM

CynthiaSM: If you're going to try this approach then you MUST name at least one thing you have in common to show that you actually read her profile.


What she said. And leave out the "nice photos". Common sense says if you're sending the message then obviously you like her pictures. No need to state the obvious. You wouldn't walk into Taco Bell and tell the cashier "hey guys, you sell tacos!!".
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