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 country_girl379
Joined: 2/2/2017
Msg: 1
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
My boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day for my family dinner! I invited him days before because he said he was going to be home by himself & so he agreed to come over . As Christmas afternoon crept by he stopped texting me, then 6pm came and it was dinner time . My family wanted to wait to eat until he showed up , out of respect , and I told them don’t worry about because I’m not sure if he was coming anymore .
He left me hanging for 3 hours with no text , his phone was off , and I was worried sick he crashed his car on the way here . Finally after 3 hours he sends me a text saying a fridge fell on him when he was taking it out of the house & he was knocked unconscious for 2 hours laying in a snowbank . He said he had to go inside to warm up, and then was going to bed . I told him to go to a hospital! He could have a concussion and I got no answer .
The next morning he plays it off like nothing happened, so I got suspicious & started asking questions . Now he’s losing his temper over my suspicion & saying he went to the hospital to get checked , they gave him a pill for his migraine and sent him home. I asked for proof and he said don’t feel like I should have to do something like that...

I don’t know how to feel, my gut is telling me it was a bullshit story . All I wanted was some proof of this story, or something to ease my mind and he wants to throw our relationship away now because of it . Should I just forget about him ? or am I being childish?

***and if you want to look at my profile and question it go ahead but I haven’t used this site in months, especially since starting to see this guy 2 months ago ****just left the profile here instead of figuring out how to delete it ***
 cindi_rella
Joined: 7/25/2016
Msg: 2
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 9:47:22 AM
No part of that ridiculous story sounds true. After 2 months of dating, it sounds like he wasnt ready to meet the family or spend
a holiday with you. Time for a new boyfriend in 2018. This one sounds like a dud.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 3
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 10:00:20 AM
Highly unlikely this was true. Most likely he got cold feet about meeting the OP's family. If he had contacted the OP earlier Christmas morning or on Christmas Eve saying he was sick ( headache, cold etc ), then at least it would have been plausible explanation.
 blackbeauty744
Joined: 12/1/2015
Msg: 4
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 10:16:00 AM
New year, new boyfriend.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 5
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 10:28:42 AM
Ahh, the posters here in the forums are always quick to say, “Kick him/her to the curb!” And for once, I tend to agree. Not because he didn’t want to come to your family Christmas dinner (I don’t fault him for that), but because of the ridiculous way he tried to lie his way out of the no-show.

Saying he would come, and then ghosting you was bad. Lying about it afterwards was worse.



The next morning he plays it off like nothing happened, so I got suspicious & started asking questions .

This was your only mistake. Don’t get into questioning him. Either believe him or don’t believe him. And if you don’t believe him, then it is time to move on.
 country_girl379
Joined: 2/2/2017
Msg: 6
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 10:51:11 AM
After questioning him about it he started getting really defensive and angry at me , saying I should trust him and he shouldn’t have to prove it to me what happened . Now he’s not talking to me because I don’t believe him and I think we’re pretty much done . Just so many red flags and my gut says to just forget him
 sundress1
Joined: 10/29/2017
Msg: 7
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 10:59:41 AM

Ahh, the posters here in the forums are always quick to say, “Kick him/her to the curb!” And for once, I tend to agree. Not because he didn’t want to come to your family Christmas dinner (I don’t fault him for that), but because of the ridiculous way he tried to lie his way out of the no-show.

Saying he would come, and then ghosting you was bad. Lying about it afterwards was worse.


Exactly. I can understand him not wanting to go. He just should have been honest about it.
 sussex11
Joined: 12/24/2017
Msg: 8
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 11:06:12 AM
This guy is something else. Why can't men just say, I don't want to yet. Any mature man would just be honest. But, listen, your not the only one this has happened too. So, just brush yourself off and move on.

I had a man chew me out on fish for not just texting him alone. I had never dated him, I had talked to him before a time or two but he knew, I was not that into him. I tried to get him to open up about his feelings, but he was just so dang angry. So jealous, and immature, I had to hide my profile and block him. I believe us women have to teach men how to treat us. The reason I am single is because of that....so just sayin stuff happens to others as well. I am still on fish, to do what all the others are doing, to find a suitable partner. Nothing wrong with that!!!
 calliopedreams
Joined: 11/21/2017
Msg: 9
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 12:56:57 PM
Mostly agree with Henry.

The real deal breaker isn't just being stood up, then the absurd lie, but the "gaslighting" he did to you trying to make you seem crazy for questioning him.

Your BF (and Henry) was right though, he shouldn't have to "Prove" anything, because at that point, it's over.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 10
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 12:57:22 PM
Two hours in the cold....how cold?
Hypothermia would be a factor.
Migraine I suffer them the hospital
put me on an IV drip.
I would feel a hospital hearing this
story would keep him over night for
observation due to his claims of being
out for two hours in the cold suffering
a headache ( possible head injury).
My first clue is the angry he is trying to
through you off his trail of lies. If he had
nothing to hide he would prove it. Easy to
get a hospital report!
Great story teller not so great boyfriend.
A Christmas miracle that he's alive.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 11
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 2:04:56 PM

Note to self: If a fridge ever falls on me and knocks me unconscious in the snow, no one will believe me.

Thanks for your trust in me, f*ckers.

Oh, and "lmao" at this chick having a default pic of herself holding a fish, something I've heard countless women whine about men doing. I don't fish and wouldn't post a picture like that myself, but still..
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 12
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 2:13:52 PM
Ridiculous. Of all appliances, only a dryer is easier to move than a fridge. A fridge is mostly hollow, doesn't weigh much, you can even shift it around when it's full of food. I've never seen a fridge fall over. All the weight is at the bottom. A sofa is more dangerous, unless the fridge fell on him from the top of a staircase like some cartoon piano.

Yeah - he did not consider your relationship serious enough to eat with your family on XMAS. He should have said so. You inadvertently applied social pressure on him and he reacted very, very, badly. You probably didn't think dinner was a big deal - just an opportunity, but he took it all very bad. His bad excuse and your demand for an explanation created it's own animal that wasn't even about the social pressure. Now he's caught in a lie, and you're both mad at each other.

You can walk it back, but it won't be comfortable for either of you. Even if you say "I'm sorry I pressured you to meet my folks", he'll bring up the fact that you don't believe him and try to use that as a sheild. You were RIGHT to not believe him, because that story was crap. You would both have to agree to walk it back - but - now there's the fact that YOU can't trust his stories, and HE thinks you are manipulating him into something permanent.

Bummer.
 from site to sight
Joined: 11/30/2007
Msg: 13
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 2:18:14 PM
"...he sends me a text saying a fridge fell on him when he was taking it out of the house & he was knocked unconscious for 2 hours laying in a snowbank ."

The guy sure is a terrible bullshitter. There are so many holes in the story. First of all, I don't know anyone who moves a fridge out of a house by themselves. Wasn't there a helper or anybody else in the house at the time who could call 911 if there's an accident? How did he end up in a snow bank for 2 hours without anybody noticing-especially if there's a knocked over fridge near him or on him? Secondly, I don't know how a fridge can fall on someone. People usually push a fridge across the floor or use a dolly. Thirdly, if a fridge falls on someone, they're likely to have other injuries, like one or more broken bones. Tell the guy he should be a fiction writer, since he can dream up weird scenarios. Or come up with more plausible excuses next time he tries to b.s. someone.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 14
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 3:57:13 PM

Note to self: If a fridge ever falls on me and knocks me unconscious in the snow, no one will believe me.


Yup that one would really fly living in Orlando.
Now here in BC Canada this story could be true.
Only thing is in two hours he would be classified
as a snowman with a new beer fridge.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 15
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 4:11:38 PM
He's a liar, a really lousy liar, who is feebly trying to make you the problem...please tell me you are not desperate enough to want anything more to do with him.
 dpwesu
Joined: 3/25/2013
Msg: 16
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 4:38:28 PM
You are kidding.....right?????

I think his excuse for not coming is a whole load of B.S. Basically in all truth, he wasn't ready to celebrate a major holiday with your family, bailed out, and LIED about it!

Makes you wonder what else he is lying about.......I would kick his happy azz to the curb and NOT look back.
 backcreek7
Joined: 12/2/2014
Msg: 17
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 4:44:26 PM
~ stick with the nice fish, he's a good catch & won't lie, even though he has a largemouth ...
col ( chuckle out loud )
 forumslady
Joined: 12/7/2016
Msg: 18
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 4:47:17 PM
country girl379- " am I being childish?"
No.
Your bs radar is pinging and for good reason.
Besides, he is the one being childish.
He is stone walling you, a classic passive/aggressive move to avoid a genuine conversation and/or accountability for his actions.

I can't say he was wrong to not want to meet your family after a 2 month relationship, but I can say he was wrong in the way he handled it.
A mature person who cared about you would have been honest and told you they weren't ready to meet your family yet, but would have been open to other plans that would have been ok with both of you.

I'm seeing a lack of maturity on his part, worse yet, signs that he doesn't respect you.

My suggestion: Take what happened and think if you truly want someone who would behave this way as a part of your future.
I think you started this thread because, in your gut, you know what to do, but aren't sure.
I hope this helps you decide.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 19
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 4:47:34 PM

Yup that one would really fly living in Orlando.


Is it "turn you over my knee" time again, wisenheimer?
 Yule_liquor
Joined: 12/7/2011
Msg: 20
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 5:54:21 PM

I don’t know how to feel, my gut is telling me it was a bullshit story


your BS detecting sensor is working just fine!
Not only was it an awkward lie.....he's insulting your intelliegence by expecting you not to question it.
Time to hand him his "walking papers"
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 21
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 6:03:56 PM

Is it "turn you over my knee" time again, wisenheimer?


Is there furry handcuffs to go with this scenario?
 PennyAnte
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 22
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 7:11:22 PM
He most certainly has an imagination. I mean it's not just bull shit story it's a full of shit story. Better luck next time.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 23
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 7:23:43 PM

I've never seen a fridge fall over.


Some of you people lead such sheltered lives.

Next you're going to tell me you've never seen a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow either.


and my gut says to just forget him


But....but....then we won't get to hear about any more of his highly entertaining excuses......


Just so many red flags


Do tell.
 Nestaron
Joined: 10/11/2017
Msg: 24
boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 7:36:22 PM
Hey now it's possible I told my girlfriend I wouldn't be over on the weekend once a pop machine fell on me she moved on she found out it did. lol

Not saying he isn't lying cause out cold in a snow bank for a couple of hours in a bit different something like hypothermia and frostbite happens laying in the snow that long. How cold was it here is your answer

http://www.businessinsider.com/how-long-does-it-take-to-get-frostbite-or-hypothermia-2014-1
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 25
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boyfriend stood me up Christmas Day
Posted: 12/27/2017 8:44:18 PM
^^^ Yes, a pop machine is a hellava lot heavier than a fridge, even the smaller ones that held bottles back in the day.
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