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 BlindFreddy1
Joined: 9/9/2017
Msg: 1
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Western men seeking love abroadPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Did anyone watch " Sunday night " on channel 7 ? I think it was about a week or 2 ago .
The topic was about Western men of all ages seeking love in the Ukraine..

Here is the link...

https://7plus.com.au/sunday-night?episode-id=SNIT18-032&autoPlay=false&fbclid=IwAR3lnvySLFkpSOIqH4dcK_wVmBKW4FNF_7WzKP7Tizpq9PFBwPxH6htmFoE

I personally think there is anything wrong with it...
I think it just represents the times that we live in todays society....

The western world is so materialistic , nasty and so judgemental ..
If it all works out for these guys great. If not so be it . There willing to take a chance.
I don't think they have that much to loose that couldn't happen in there home country..
As it seems a hard enough job to find love in your own country.
 mahwahgirl339114
Joined: 10/31/2017
Msg: 2
Western men seeking love abroad
Posted: 10/27/2018 11:15:50 PM
Are you interested OP? Ukrainian girls are pretty, can cook, and are very savvy financially (meaning your finances).
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 3
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Western men seeking love abroad
Posted: 10/27/2018 11:20:25 PM
I think it's great if that is what one wants. It's nothing new, people have been meeting and marrying people from other countries since travel began.
 BlindFreddy1
Joined: 9/9/2017
Msg: 4
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Posted: 10/27/2018 11:26:22 PM
Maybe....But you could be financially ripped off just as easily in your home country by your own people...
 BlindFreddy1
Joined: 9/9/2017
Msg: 5
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Western men seeking love abroad
Posted: 10/28/2018 12:39:28 AM
Sorry spelling error in original thread .... "I personally think there is nothing wrong with it"...Just to clarify
 calliopedreams
Joined: 11/21/2017
Msg: 6
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Posted: 10/28/2018 3:05:08 AM
Ukraine is suffering from some serious unrest and war in the Eastern part of the country.

Not counting airfare, you have to have at least 7,000 Australian dollars for a week tour there.

I know you live with your parents and are of modest means. Can you afford the trip?
It's not like it was 10-20 years ago. You have to go through a broker, like Anastasia International, pay for translators and numerous dates, with no guarantee of success.

https://smartraveller.gov.au/Countries/europe/eastern/Pages/ukraine.aspx

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/apr/06/ukraine-wife-internet-romance-industry-online-scam

Also, if someone has a fear of meeting women, it will not be "cured" by flying overseas.

Cambodia, Thailand, Philippines, etc. are closer to Australia and cheaper, so you may want to consider the Asia option.

I realize you have never had a girlfriend, and been on pof for almost 10 years complaining about your luck with women.

Maybe overseas is your best bet.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 7
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Western men seeking love abroad
Posted: 10/28/2018 6:59:55 AM
OP there is nothing wrong with going on an adventure overseas. Realize though that dating and getting to know someone takes time and there is NO SHORTCUT. If you go overseas you should be prepared to stay/live there for sometime or you run risks!
As for where you go..choose based on your interests. Travel is a time to enjoy exploring different cultures and food.

But if you insist on going just to "find" a women I would suggest Asia..Philippines. I never have been there but having many expat/military friends I see the advantage. Being a former American colony they speak English, like Americans(Australians TOO I bet) and there is actually many retired Americans living there which means an infrastructure to support your search.

As for Ukraine...I gasp at the thought. Nothing to do with the so called "war"...most of the country is safe from that. Also prices are quite cheap atm. If you were to search on your own you can literally find an apt in some areas 20 a day and everything local is cheap.
You will have a few obstacles in Ukraine though:
1. English usage is the lowest in Europe and maybe even the world. I am sometimes shocked at how low. That makes things kind of hard IMHO. If you must Google Translate works lol

2. Well, tbh and blunt, Ukraine is one of the most foreign phobic countries on the planet. They truly see foreigners as outsiders and that can make things a bit uneasy. Even the majority of normal women are phobic. I speak almost fluent Russian and they see me as an outsider.

Again, these are just my opinions but they are kind accurate. I am half Russian from Ukrainian and me and my brother even inherited our family flat there when my mom passed away so have a birds eye view but it has been over a decade since I stepped into the country. I would much rather spend my time on the Ligurian Italian coast where my father came from lol

Heck, I got a better idea...MOVE to Brooklyn. I can't walk one foot outside my door without banging into a Ukrainian or Russian women. Although most immigrate with husbands I kind of notice they are single after a while. But here my old time neighbors have the opposite problem you have. They sell their homes to get away from all the former USSR who live here.
 Spectrallight
Joined: 9/14/2018
Msg: 8
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Posted: 10/28/2018 7:15:43 AM

I kind of notice they are single after a while.


Yeah, Not surprised. Meal ticket expiration date exceeded.
 Carnival_Fishing
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 9
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Posted: 10/28/2018 7:56:50 AM
There's a reality TV show called 90 Day Fiance. The premise is couples meeting on-line, where one is American and the other is from another country. They fall in love without meeting in person, and plan to marry-that might become more common in the age of electronic social media, where meeting someone in person is becoming less important. The way to get around the problem of living in different countries is getting a 90-day engagement visa, where if they get married within the 90 days, the non-American is granted permanent residence status in the U.S.-if they want to live in the U.S., which all do.

I think it's more of a 90 days to get my green card show, where some might go through the motions of marrying for love only, but the grand prize is the green card. It's especially evident when they show some old geezer from the U.S. who is engaged to an 18 or 20 yer old foreign woman.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 10
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Posted: 10/28/2018 8:39:02 AM
I did this all 30 years ago with my 1st wife who is Japanese. We met through the penpal section of Kerrang!!! magazine while I was working at a record store. I wrote to her because I was interested in Japanese Films,Anime and Manga and she wrote back because she was interested American Heavy Metal and Thrash. We sent letters to each other almost every day for a over a year. We met for the first time in person 1988 and got married in 1989 after she got her 90 day engagement visa. We lived for a while in Connecticut then moved to Japan for 4 years, Our Son was born there. We moved to Minneapolis in 1992 but got divorced in 1998. She never became a US citizen and last year she moved to Japan to work but last month she came back to Minneapolis to visit our son and US Customs took her Green Card and wouldn't return it to her. I think it was because she no longer has a permanent address here.
 calliopedreams
Joined: 11/21/2017
Msg: 11
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Posted: 10/28/2018 9:20:29 AM

The western world is so materialistic , nasty and so judgemental .

Really? Wait until you see what it is like to be in the Ukraine ... just ask Joe.

https://themoscowtimes.com/articles/russian-women-theyre-just-not-that-into-you-51796

Here is info about 90 Day Visa - USA. It can cost several thousand dollars to obtain:

https://www.us-immigration.com/blog/90-day-fiance-get-married-within-90-days-or-leave-the-us/

OP, you live in Australia. Have you considered the costs of returning with your "bride"? These are expensive propositions.

You have had little travel experience. I have been to Saint Petersburg, Russia, and exploitation of tourists is rampant: pick-pockets, etc. I went everywhere with my hosts, so felt safe. Living there on your own, without language skills, seems dicey.

Here are some tips on how to impress Russian women, which sounds like the same way to impress most women of any ethnic background, IMO:

https://www.tripsavvy.com/visitors-guide-to-impressing-russian-women-1622557

Anyway, the notion of "overseas spouses" seems to be gaining more acceptance. Some websites are now offering overseas husbands for women, Irish men being quite popular (they DO have the most lovely accents):

https://www.irishcentral.com/culture/craic/find-your-very-own-liam-neeson-among-irelands-mail-order-husbands


P. S. CBGB77


She never became a US citizen and last year she moved to Japan to work but last month she came back to Minneapolis to visit our son and US Customs took her Green Card and wouldn't return it to her. I think it was because she no longer has a permanent address here.


If your ex-wife was outside the USA for more than a year, she lost her Permanent resident status:



Lawful Permanent Resident. Any person not a citizen of the United States who is living in the U.S. under legally recognized and lawfully recorded permanent residence as an immigrant. Also known as “permanent resident alien,” “resident alien permit holder,” and “Green Card holder.”Mar 22, 2018
Lawful Permanent Resident | USCIS
https://www.uscis.gov/tools/glossary/lawful-permanent-resident

How long can I be outside the US with a green card?
If you are a lawful permanent resident (green card holder), you may leave the U.S. multiple times and reenter, as long as you do not intend to stay outside the U.S. for 1 year or more.


P. P. S. OP - Since you are part owner of a small family business, I think your family should be informed of any decision you may make about marrying a foreign bride. Your local courts have deferential divorce laws that may have a significant impact on a business that took years for your family to build, after you may have only been married for a couple of years, before getting divorced. Perhaps you should be removed from any ownership or shareholder position before a marriage.


If you are getting engaged to someone from another country then you should take additional steps to familiarize yourself with your rights regarding domestic violence, abuse and divorce in your partner's country. Many countries including the USA, Australia etc. have laws that protect the visa status of foreign women who are unfortunate enough to marry or become engaged to an abusive or violent partner. This means that you can usually seek help for problems related to domestic violence while maintaining your legal right to remain in the country.

In the event of divorce, courts in many countries such as the USA, UK, Australia etc. will consider the equitable distribution of all marital assets based on a variety of factors. You should therefore consider how you may be affected in the event of divorce.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 12
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Posted: 10/28/2018 10:20:43 AM

Really? Wait until you see what it is like to be in the Ukraine ... just ask Joe.


HAHA....it is like dating a women from the 1950's who wants all the gadgets of 2030 TODAY!
The culture does put a priority on material wealth..as in flashy stuff. Since they don't believe in banks they spend everything right away. He would need to find a village girl if he wants a non spender but that type of women has other issues including perhaps thinking the cold war still exists!
What I always found fascinating though about Eastern Slavic women after the collapse is their practicality. If , for example , you have very little money, that's fine as long as you spend it on her. But if you are a big shot wealthy guy, you are also expected to spend it all. No wonder my parents divorced and my relations got strained with my mom and her family when I decided go into law enforcement. They had these like big plans of me opening a "business" or something like that. I was always like what type of business? Never got a good answer! But come to think of it she married my dad when he ran night clubs in NYC, and the divorce happened soon after he became a public school teacher.
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 13
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Posted: 10/28/2018 10:30:56 AM

Since they don't believe in banks they spend everything right away.
about ten years ago, I did some work for a couple that just moved here. they said inflation was so bad that you HAD to spend it right away. he told me how he bought a used tractor tire once, even though he owned no tractor. his explanation was that the money for the tire would buy X amount of food today but could be 1/10th in a week. the tire would sell for enough to buy the same amount of food regardless of inflation.
 PollyR107
Joined: 4/8/2016
Msg: 14
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Posted: 10/28/2018 11:06:13 AM
As a Brit of Chinese descent, I can see why some guys prefer foreign women, i still get proprosal from men who say they can offer me a visa to stay in the uk. Lol. I’m British, don’t need any visa.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being in a relationship with a person of a different ethnic background. I’ve always dated white men. Maybe I’m not so attractive to guys of similar ethnicity.

However, finding your SO through this way might not be your best bet. People from developing countries are sometimes struggling financially and prepared to do anything to get out of the country. They might decide to marry westerners for the wrong reasons.

You need a partner for life, not someone who wants material things from you. I’ve met a guy who foreign wife left him for another guy and a large debt for him. I know it was just one couple, but it shows that one always has to be careful when it comes to choosing their partner, whether be it online dating, IRL, etc.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 15
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Posted: 10/28/2018 11:18:49 AM
LOL, My late father's 3rd and 4th wives, came to the USOFA ……………..they stayed, he returned to the Philippines, to try it again. He died before 5th wife could escape. That's ok, she collected his entire estate!
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 16
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Posted: 10/28/2018 11:24:58 AM

The message you are replying to:
Posted By: calliopedreams on 10/28/2018 1129 AM
Subject: Western men seeking love abroad

P. S. CBGB77

She never became a US citizen and last year she moved to Japan to work but last month she came back to Minneapolis to visit our son and US Customs took her Green Card and wouldn't return it to her. I think it was because she no longer has a permanent address here.

If your ex-wife was outside the USA for more than a year, she lost her Permanent resident status:

Lawful Permanent Resident. Any person not a citizen of the United States who is living in the U.S. under legally recognized and lawfully recorded permanent residence as an immigrant. Also known as “permanent resident alien,” “resident alien permit holder,” and “Green Card holder.”Mar 22, 2018
Lawful Permanent Resident | USCIS
https://www.uscis.gov/tools/glossary/lawful-permanent-resident

How long can I be outside the US with a green card?
If you are a lawful permanent resident (green card holder), you may leave the U.S. multiple times and reenter, as long as you do not intend to stay outside the U.S. for 1 year or more.


Thanks for the post and info.She has been back to USA multiple time since she left last year so not sure exactly why they took her green card(I just got this story second hand through my son). I was just guessing it is because she doesn't have a permanent address here since she moved.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 17
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Posted: 10/28/2018 11:34:55 AM
^^^
Something I learned and is the same all over the world is that everyone always wants more and if they can't reach your level they prefer you go down to their level. Actually the latter part sounds like Democrat mentality lol

point is , if you go someplace where you are the "big shot" you are going to do well. But the problem is what happens when the honeymoon is over?
You bring the gal to your country where you are just middle class and your appeal goes out the door once they see your average and that there are bigger shoe boxes on the next block. It is human kind!
Red your father should have moved there. If he did , the scenario would be different. He would be the upper class white guy which is adored over there and all his wives would be fighting over him.
It is like gals fighting here for the Harvard graduate(substitute any elite adjective) or guys fighting for the hot women. Like that guy in Game of Thrones said" it is all about ________________________(you fill it in).

Personally I love foreign women(Europeans) and thank the stars I can live in a city that has millions of them!

That being said, OP don't send money to that Nigerian princess who says she needs it to untie her wealth. Send me instead and I will help you out and throw in the Brooklyn Bridge too!

But OP there is nothing wrong with it. At worst you are leveraging. But at the end of the day ..we are all commoditized one way or the other . Women in your native country are doing it and men are doing it. It is part of life. Those who can't accept that need to grow up.
Some men's redeeming commodity is their looks which fade. Others is their sense of humor, and some others depend on material wealth..which often is a product of hard work and skills so it is respectable. In some places like Japan just being a white male was attractive and the Japanese women might be richer than you are.

I repeat the problem is when there is a inner desire to get out of a bad situation and there is no ample time for a decent length of time court ship. That is partly why these type of relationships fail. I suspect if the US gov't wanted to put an end to it it wouldn't allow Green cards be acquired so easy. Any relationship is heading in the direction of failure if ample courtship time isn't observed, no matter what country!
 Carnival_Fishing
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 18
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Posted: 10/28/2018 2:58:49 PM
Are there any countries or religions where it's still custom for the guy to receive a dowry if he weds a woman? That would be tempting. There could be some reverse gold digging going on-where a guy chooses a bride according to how much of a dowry he will receive from her family.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 19
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Posted: 10/28/2018 4:39:56 PM

Are there any countries or religions where it's still custom for the guy to receive a dowry if he weds a woman?


If so, it's probably in goats and sheep.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 20
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Posted: 10/28/2018 6:55:01 PM
I think lack of courtship time isn't the issue so much as different cultures/values. For people who marry who are of the same culture/religion and urban/rural background, the odds are really very good regardless of the length of courtship.

I also think there are enough foreign women living here in North America working on temporary foreign worker visas who would be receptive to marrying a local guy so there's no need to go abroad. I know a farmer here of Ukrainian decent in his 50s who married a Ukrainian woman in her 30s who was here working at a Kentucky Fried Chicken. They've been married for over 10 years now and have 2 kids but it helped that he spoke Ukrainian (he's 3rd generation Canadian but Ukrainians in my area, including my own family, retained quite a bit of their culture and their language until recently) and she was from a small town as well. Her older sister actually came over a year after she got married and she married her sister's husband's cousin.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 21
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Posted: 10/28/2018 9:26:19 PM
Having penpals was fun.One of my other penpals in Japan was Michie Nakatani the original bass player for Shonen Knife. Michie was pen pals with an American Guy Steve Davis at the same time that I was Penpals with my 1st wife. We all ended up being close friends when we lived in Japan,we hung out alot and went to each others wedding .This is Shonen Knife in 1992

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1d442yXZFE

This is Michie and me when she visited me in Connecticut in 1988

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v228/fuzztone65/Shonen%20Knife/003.jpg

This is backstage at Roy Wilkens Auditorium in St Paul MN in 1993 when they opened for the Nirvana. My ex is 2nd from the right.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v228/fuzztone65/Shonen%20Knife/sk001_1.jpg
 BlindFreddy1
Joined: 9/9/2017
Msg: 22
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Posted: 10/28/2018 11:18:28 PM
Don't really know what all the fuss is about..From what i hear and see..Most of today's Australian / Western women don't want to settle down and are very happy with there careers and independence..

Ok fair enough but why should Aussie / Western men be criticized for thinking outside the square and following there heart.??? ...Taking a chance..

Oz is no safe haven either...

You don't have to be legally married in Australia to loose any financial asserts ..You only have to be living under the same roof for 6 months ...She can take you for everything you have got...
Australian born couples have been ripping off each other under this law for yrs...Nothing new.

Just take the Family law courts for instance...Very rarely is it in favour of the man..

So what's the difference...???

If you are lucky enough to find someone overseas through this service you bring her back months later she " Dogs " you...Bad luck...

But its nothing that hasn't happened on our own turf.....
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 23
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Posted: 10/29/2018 1:09:03 AM
^^^ I thought I recognized you there Baffalobill. Still no luck on the dating I see.

Going abroad for a broad?

Save your money.
 calliopedreams
Joined: 11/21/2017
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Posted: 10/29/2018 2:54:01 AM

Don't really know what all the fuss is about..From what i hear and see..Most of today's Australian / Western women don't want to settle down and are very happy with there careers and independence..

Ok fair enough but why should Aussie / Western men be criticized for thinking outside the square and following there heart.??? ...Taking a chance..


Whom are you addressing? Are you debating yourself?

Look, you got advice from people who have been there/done that.

Where is the fuss?
Who is criticizing?

The only part of your post that deserves criticism is the premise that if you go to the Ukraine, you will be shielded from "materialism." Nothing could be further from the truth.

As far as "thinking outside the box," you have got to be kidding. The mail order bride industry has been around for hundreds of years. There is nothing unusual about it. Search the threads on pof for "mail order," and you will find entries back to 2005. Redundant as can be.


Anyway, you did not start this thread for advice, since you are not really interested in meeting women. I recognize you as lightningboy1/lightningman1 from 2009.


So, were you hoping people would get upset about men going overseas? No one cares. Fill your boots. Book a flight.

As for you, 1) you can't afford it, 2) you are too passive and would never initiate a meeting.

So, the whole topic was just for kicks and grins in the hopes you would create a controversy? Brother, you are about one coffee date fantasy away from MGTOW.

Quit looking for excuses to peddle to your family about why you can't meet women and just come to grips with the fact you're not that interested.

Not everyone is destined to be "coupled."
 flowersinthelake
Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 25
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Posted: 10/29/2018 6:19:34 AM

The western world is so materialistic , nasty and so judgemental ..


Yet, they want to exercise their full repertoire of judgment, materialism, and nastiness when they quest to get that perfect Barbie doll they never seem to find ! "No local fat chic, please."

I wish these men were honest with themselves. What they want is a sex trophy and a maid who isn't going to question their cheapness even after they've fully trafficked the women of their dreams in the US (I'm speaking about US as I live here) with lies and pending poverty.


If it all works out for these guys great. If not so be it . There willing to take a chance.
I don't think they have that much to loose that couldn't happen in there home country..


They could lose their wallets, their marriages and kids that might come from the relationships.

Unfortunately, the women in these "mail-order" arrangements also find themselves on the street when the old man's hunger is satiated and are easily sex-trafficked (again) by other men (with a whole host of other circumstances). This has happened to many Ukrainian women, trafficked trans-nationally, under the guise or marriage and stability or when the men get tired of them and turn them out on the street.

Value systems between two people do clash and when you're dealing with somebody who wants a better life, they will treat the relationship as a business transaction, penny for penny. The man who wants to satiate his exoticism meets the woman who wants material security who doesn't give a shit about his craving other than to use it for opportunity. The BS does and can work both ways.


As it seems a hard enough job to find love in your own country.


People want it all without working for it.

I'm not saying this is the case for others who want to satisfy their curiosity about other people from other cultures and actually find somebody they love in the process of learning about them. It has worked out well for people ... but not for others, it has cost them their lives.
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