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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?      Home login  
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 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 1
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
It seems no matter what app or dating site I use with little exception I'm seeing the same damn faces over and over, either people I've already dated, gone out with or messaged before and got a "thanks but no thanks" some of these women I saw their adds online consistently for years. POF and OKC seems to think they are possible matches because of shared interests And I would agree but sadly most of them did not.


As soon as I add my search filters BAM!!! the same 20-30 people pop up with maybe a 1 or 2 new ones every few months who moved here from somewhere else.



And its not like my search filters are all that strict I'm open to any race almost any age(15 years either direction but I list 20 just in case because I've seen much older women I find attractive and I would not rule out a woman in her early 20's though I would have to think hard on it.)


I pretty much only filter out women with kids(at home), obese and lives more than 15-20 miles(don't do long distance).
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 2
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 11/30/2018 6:33:44 PM

I pretty much only filter out women with kids(at home), obese and lives more than 15-20 miles(don't do long distance).
that would exclude most! any one of those would seriously shorten the list. for my area, including all three would exclude over 90% and likely over 95%!
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 3
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 11/30/2018 6:42:32 PM
I'm not trying to be funny here but are you saying there are that few women 32 - 64 who are single, kept themselves in decent(not perfect) shape who's kids have grown up and moved out or never had kids, within a 20 minute to half an hour drive?
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 4
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 11/30/2018 7:09:02 PM
where I live, yes! most have kids, or grandkids their raising, most are overweight (some extremely overweight) and any that interest me are over an hour away. if you live in the city, you might have more locally but even including my city and suburbs, it is slim pickins. while I have managed to date my share of 'skinny' girls, every last one ended up being a hard luck case in need of saving.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 5
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 11/30/2018 7:41:42 PM
I can understand that, in my area it seems any women that I would want a long term relationship with are having too much fun being single. often saying "I just got the kids out of the house, I just wanna have fun while i still can, but yes I want to settle down someday just not ready now" Translation they want to wait until the guys aren't beating a path to their door anymore lol, it's the downside of the fact that people keep their looks longer there days. I have noticed the most attractive women in my area are either in their early 20's or 40+ late 20's - mid 30's not so much, my guess is early 20's is simply youth and fast metabolism, many late 20's - mid to late 30's women let themselves go while they are raising their kiddos, and 40 plus it's the fact that many women once the kids have grown up and moved off finally have time for themselves and start hitting the gym and/or getting work done. all over town in front of stores and doctors offices are those free magazines full of local cosmetic surgeons that offer financing.
Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 9:22:49 AM
"I'm not trying to be funny here but are you saying there are that few women 32 - 64 who are single, kept themselves in decent(not perfect) shape who's kids have grown up and moved out or never had kids, within a 20 minute to half an hour drive?"

>>>its possible such unicorns are already surrounded by male friends, waiting all this time for them to become single? :)

its true, all of us in our days of high metabolism and springy skin, looked hotter. Around here, a slender lass "of a certain age" either works out (and the musculature shows it) or they smoke like a chimney. but i can't blame any woman who says, "ok, i put my husband and kids first all those years--now its my turn".

meanwhile, the smaller the population in your search area, the sooner you run out of viable candidates. the best luck i had with OLD is when i used frequent flyer miles to search the country. that was pre-TSA. not sure i'd want to explain carrying a "neck massager" to use on a woman i met online who i'm hoping looks like her photo and isn't a 15 yr old in his mom's basement
:)
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 7
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 10:55:10 AM
Yep and unfortunately every time I lift my distance filter I get messaged by women who live waaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy out in the sticks. read there profiles and they actually are looking for what I'm looking for, its depressing.

where as in my local area anytime I run across a profile where a woman seems compatible(same hobbies and interests), and I find them attractive I get down to what they seek and its always "just friends" or "casual dating nothing serious" so I ad to my filters only those seeking "long term" or "marriage" And then all I see is single mothers and or morbidly obese women and the few women I would find attractive haven't logged in since 2012 or something.
 ontheotherhand
Joined: 6/24/2018
Msg: 8
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 12:37:31 PM

It seems no matter what app or dating site I use with little exception I'm seeing the same damn faces over and over,


This is why I don't advocate spending money on the paid sites. I've seen them endorsed with statements like people are more serious when they pay. That wasn't been my experience. The problem with OLD is that too many people have crazy expectations. This isn't Amazon where we see something (someone) we think we want, order and is delivered in a couple of days. Women are just as bad as men with this mindset. The difference is that women don't need to put the effort since men are more active pursuers.
 grover14
Joined: 2/14/2014
Msg: 9
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 1:30:20 PM
Yes, I feel that way. I think it's just a natural progression after you've been on here for several years. You've seen everyone, they've seen you, so I tend to look at the new users alot.

I don't pursue very many women, but I do still look. If someone really interesting came along, and we're local, I'll contact them.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 10
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 2:38:58 PM

Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?


No. it's more like the overwhelming majority of them are contaminated due to the pollution in the water.


The problem with OLD is that too many people have crazy expectations.


Indeed.
Ferrari only made 500 of the $1.4 million Ferrari LaFerrari model for worldwide sale.
So how many 6 foot tall male models driving around in one do women think they are going to run into?
 MyTrueCompanion
Joined: 9/20/2018
Msg: 11
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 2:59:34 PM
OP you are a good looking man, I am surprised to read your post.

I am remarried to someone I met in real life via my last job, but I did have many dates over quite a few years, many from online, as did some of my friends.

I found our experiences varied quite a bit due to many reasons. Some was looks, personality as well as behaviors online (aggressor, passive participant. etc. ) as well as behavior face to face after meeting.

So yes, success rates will vary just as much as our experiences do.

Switch it up a bit...
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 12
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 3:13:41 PM
Yes. My hole has been fished out for years. If this wasn't free, I wouldn't be here. The numbers in my area, are about eight single men to one woman. Throw a couple filters in that, and I think I'd have a better chance of putting up a sign in my front yard advertising for women to stop by.

Pickings are slim, and getting worse by the day.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 13
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 3:40:33 PM

I am remarried to someone I met in real life via my last job, but I did have many dates over quite a few years, many from online, as did some of my friends.

I found our experiences varied quite a bit due to many reasons. Some was looks, personality as well as behaviors online (aggressor, passive participant. etc. ) as well as behavior face to face after meeting.

So yes, success rates will vary just as much as our experiences do.

Switch it up a bit...

Thanx for the complement, and you are very attractive yourself, in fact I had to check out your profile to make sure you weren't someone I dated 3 years ago who has spent the better part of the last 2 years trying to get back with me(you 2 share a striking resemblance though she prolly weighs about 30 lbs more than you now though she was prolly 20 lbs lighter than you when we dated).
We had hit it off immediately problem was she did not want to be exclusive(until 5 or 6 months after we stopped seeing each other) now every few months she will blow up my phone And I still see her ad pop up on all the free dating sites also, infact I know I'll be getting a call when i start seeing her online. sadly stories like that are typical of my dating life these days.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 14
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 3:47:06 PM

Pickings are slim, and getting worse by the day.


Yep I often wonder who the hell put "Slim Pickinz" in charge of my love life? He sucks at his job, his twin brother "E.Z Pickinz" did a much better job of it back in the 90's.
 Carnival_Fishing
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 15
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 4:49:47 PM
Out of the people I know who are paired up, pretty much all of them met their beau-to-be in real life-through friends-of -friends, being co-workers, chance meeting in public, etc. I can't think of anyone I know who met their dream match on line. They might have tried on-line dating, but it's a crap shoot-trying to find the perfect one among total strangers, and eliminating people who might be a good match, without ever meeting.

People trying OLD expect a guarantee that whoever they meet will be their dream Prince Charming/Cinderella, and will live happily ever after like in the fairy tales. And if that doesn't happen immediately, people feel they have been cheated. After all, in the commercials and ads they see, everybody in them meets their fantasy dream match as soon as they sign up.

People who run dating sites are happy when people don't meet their dream guy/girl. They would be out of business if everybody was successful in meeting Mr./Miss Perfect Match right away. They rely on repeat and long term customers.
 NoFearLion
Joined: 11/17/2018
Msg: 16
Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 5:42:12 PM
I think it is better if you become more social and go out and find a partner. Online dating is different from 10 years ago. Look at here, most of women are singles mothers with tons of problems with their ex husbands, bfs, child support cases, finances,etc.
 MyTrueCompanion
Joined: 9/20/2018
Msg: 17
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 6:03:43 PM

My hole has been fished out for years.


Really, try menstruation/endometriosis, pregnancy/toxemia, then menopause bwa ha ha



I had to check out your profile to make sure you weren't someone I dated 3 years ago who has spent the better part of the last 2 years trying to get back with me(you 2 share a striking resemblance though she prolly weighs about 30 lbs more than you now though she was prolly 20 lbs lighter than you when we dated).
We had hit it off immediately problem was she did not want to be exclusive(until 5 or 6 months after we stopped seeing each other) now every few months she will blow up my phone And I still see her ad pop up on all the free dating sites also, infact I know I'll be getting a call when i start seeing her online. sadly stories like that are typical of my dating life these days.

Wow they say everyone has a double, if u can inbox me her username-- I wanna see who I look like LOL, if ur not comfortable w/ that, it's OK.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 18
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 6:07:46 PM

Out of the people I know who are paired up, pretty much all of them met their beau-to-be in real life-through friends-of -friends, being co-workers, chance meeting in public, etc. I can't think of anyone I know who met their dream match on line. They might have tried on-line dating, but it's a crap shoot-trying to find the perfect one among total strangers, and eliminating people who might be a good match, without ever meeting.

People trying OLD expect a guarantee that whoever they meet will be their dream Prince Charming/Cinderella, and will live happily ever after like in the fairy tales. And if that doesn't happen immediately, people feel they have been cheated. After all, in the commercials and ads they see, everybody in them meets their fantasy dream match as soon as they sign up.

People who run dating sites are happy when people don't meet their dream guy/girl. They would be out of business if everybody was successful in meeting Mr./Miss Perfect Match right away. They rely on repeat and long term customers.

Which is why most of the women I would actually want to date were last online 3 months ago or on site that show the actual last log in sometime in 2012. Because most women worth dating who go online are snatched up quickly.



I think it is better if you become more social and go out and find a partner. Online dating is different from 10 years ago. Look at here, most of women are singles mothers with tons of problems with their ex husbands, bfs, child support cases, finances,etc.


Problem is I hate being around other guys and every place single meet in public turn out to be sausage parties.
 PennyAnte
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 19
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 7:13:38 PM
I don't know what is going on in Fort Worth but if you were here near Boston I would contact you. You have an awesome profile and pictures. Stop looking and continue to feel blessed with your life as it is. I believe in God's perfect timing the right person will give you the kind of companionship, kindness, tenderness and love you are searching for. Trust in this process of seeking and if you pray, then pray. Love your life and live a good life.... love will find you. Love yourself and you will attract love in others. The law of attraction. Good luck with your searching.
 NoFearLion
Joined: 11/17/2018
Msg: 20
Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 7:52:02 PM

Problem is I hate being around other guys and every place single meet in public turn out to be sausage parties.


Why do not you watch this video?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylxeJYRCq4w
 nba24
Joined: 4/11/2013
Msg: 21
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/1/2018 11:44:49 PM
It really dont fell like there are POF out there. I would say in real life about 95% of the women that are around my age and though I find to be attractive are either married, engaged or have a BF. The other 5% dont find me attractive. When it comes to online I have messaged a lot of women and have had like 1 responds out of like 130 and now it is rare that I find some one around my age that I am interested it. I would say like 95% of the women left either I find them to not be attractive at all or I can tell we have nothing in common or both. I really dont known how people even find people around there age that are single. I am 29 but I would say even most women around my age where off the market at like 23 even though it is said most people dont get married un till around 28-29 dont fell like it though fells more like 22-23. I almost fell like it would be easier if I was like 40 has by then women may be divorce. Its very rare I message any one any more has all the good ones are taken or not interested in me.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 22
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/2/2018 1:08:56 AM

I don't know what is going on in Fort Worth but if you were here near Boston I would contact you. You have an awesome profile and pictures. Stop looking and continue to feel blessed with your life as it is. I believe in God's perfect timing the right person will give you the kind of companionship, kindness, tenderness and love you are searching for. Trust in this process of seeking and if you pray, then pray. Love your life and live a good life.... love will find you. Love yourself and you will attract love in others. The law of attraction. Good luck with your searching


Okay I don't hate myself because if I did I would be settling for all those flaky women who want "casual dating nothing serious" but I love myself too much to settle for anything less than being someones "one and only".

And I lost my religion years ago, it was a choice of either believing he does not exist or believing he does exist and that he hates me. as I don't ask for much out of life and the little I do ask goes un answered.
Matthew 7.7 was the biggest lie ever told.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 23
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/2/2018 4:40:38 AM
I can attest to that. There was this fish I wanted to buy the other day and went back the next day to buy it and it was gone!!
 WorkPlayHaveFun
Joined: 10/20/2018
Msg: 24
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/2/2018 7:34:28 AM
So you are basically 50 and looking for women 35 to 65? And by previous statements you respect yourself too much to be with someone that only wants a one night stand. So why are you chasing 20 and 30 year olds? What do you think you have in common with someone that is still in the party stage other than sex? What do you think they are thinking when they get a message from someone as old as their dad? Most women that are single in their 20's and 30's aren't looking to settle down immediately. 20 year olds are looking to have fun and discovering who they are. 30 year olds are trying to rediscover who they are after a long marriage. 40 year olds are the ones that are usually ready to settle down and are looking for security.

Long distance to me is more than an hour drive away. I don't date out of a 25 minute drive from work, that actually opens the door to 3 more towns/cities. 15 to 20 miles isn't that large of an area its no wonder you see the exact same people.

No kids ... I can see where at age 50 you're over the raising kids stage. Cant blame you there. Kids can make dating a single mother a lot harder. However; your target audience has kids! Around here most women have kids at home until their late 30's to mid 40's. With the new generation, kids live at home until their mid 20's.

I feel that you are being unrealistic in your searches. Every guy wants to think they can still attract people 15 to 20 years younger, the vast majority can't. Since you ruled out one night stands you literally have nothing in common with someone 15 to 20 years younger than you, they know it.

Finally ... you list two free sites as your experience. I read something that says OKC now has around 17 classifications for gender/sexuality. Even 10 years ago it was for "alternative" lifestyles. POF is probably the most popular online dating site. It does draw people genuinely wanting a relationship. It also draws people just wanting to hook up, cheaters, people looking for an ego boost, people wanting to mess with someone, people that can't afford to pay for a membership, and every other motivation out there. While both free and pay sites usually have most of the same profiles, I've found women much more likely to respond on pay sites because they assume you ARE looking for a relationship because you are willing to put forth some money.
 Carnival_Fishing
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 25
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Do you feel you have run out of fish in your area?
Posted: 12/2/2018 8:11:49 AM

Every guy wants to think they can still attract people 15 to 20 years younger, the vast majority can't.


Another problem with going after someone a lot younger is a lot of women in their 20's and 30's end up with a bad case of baby rabies. How many guys in their mid to late 40's and older want to go through the phase of having and raising kids (again)? There are some women even in their 40's who feel it's time to have a kid.
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