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 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 1
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My turn for a torturous profile preview. Page 1 of 1    
Anyone care to review my profile? Specifically men. Its not that I don't respect women's opinions but I want to know what men think when they read.

I rewrite my profile often. I flipflop between giving too much info and too little.
 92AddyB
Joined: 12/26/2018
Msg: 2
My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 12/29/2018 11:57:11 AM
That's a looooooong bio. Damn. Can you not try and condense it a little? Also single mother, 3 kids? Most men might be put off by that, but then again in your age range most men will have kids anyway. Your weight, which I see no issue with by the way? You don't look obese by any stretch.

Definitely shorten your bio though. No need for a story 😜
 trinity818
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 3
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 12/30/2018 7:19:27 AM
I'm a terrible profile writer. But I don't think you should put you weight in it. It's misleading. You do not look like you weigh 197 lbs. You have a full length picture that should speak for itself. You also discuss leading a fairly physically active lifestyle.

I think you should remove this:


Another thing I'll give you is my weight. After a year on here, I have discovered that weight is a big issue. A lot of guys won't date overweight women and I've had a couple experiences I'd rather prevent from happening again. So, I'll tell you that my weight is 197 pounds.


You can always discuss it after the initial contact.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 4
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 12/31/2018 2:35:19 PM
I go back and forth with including my weight. Unfortunately too many guys ask my weight in conversations and when I've told them they've quit talking to me or said something negative. So stating my weight is like a pre-screener in a way. Debating taking it off though.
 curvylady1965
Joined: 12/31/2017
Msg: 5
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 12/31/2018 4:53:54 PM
I have never had a man ask my weight. Not an acceptable approach to conversation in my opinion and I would not give anyone the time of day if they did. I recommend taking it out. It matters how you carry your weight and the number can say something you don't want it to. Also, weight fluctuates day to day so it is doubtful you will be 197 each day and all day long. Be concerned with your weight for your health, not for how people perceive it.

I would recommend up-to-date photos. I know some are from this summer. One is older than that. It would be nice to update your pictures. Although not "old" in the eyes of many, I like very recent photos - at least one no older than two months. It is nice to at the very least post an updated photo each season.

Re: the length of relationship, just wondering why you don't select more than 10 years from the drop-down option when you have 10 years for a length in the body of your profile. Unless it was 10 years to the day, it seems reasonable that you select more than 10 years from the drop down. Others may not notice the disparity between the more than 9 years selection and the 10 years in the body. I would notice.

Based on things you have written in your posts, I know the activities you like are important to you. You seemed to have discounted a couple of men who messaged you recently because they did not enjoy the same activities. If that and height are really deal breakers, you might want to mention that (in a light way) so people who are serious about finding someone know not to message you if they are not the required height or not into the things you enjoy.

In terms of what you are looking for, part of your profile says friends, then it says looking to enjoy dating, then it mentions finding someone you really connect with. It may seem to some like you are not sure what you want.

Did you intend to keep the age range starting as low as 27? I just ask because it is an area you may have overlooked after setting it initially.

Also, did you want to talk about what you are willing to do with the time you have available? For example, are you willing to travel, are you open to meeting once a week or more or less than that? Some may bypass your profile because they get the impression you don't have time to be flexible and meet them half way. If you can be flexible, it might help to let men know.
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 6
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 1/2/2019 2:06:34 PM

My kids are my #1 priority. That being said, I believe that its good to have a social life outside my kids because it makes me a happier person and a better mom.


No doubt. But, and this is my opinion only, those reading your profile want to know "ok, what's in it for me?" A crass assessment, I know, but I also believe it's mostly accurate. It really doesn't much matter to the reader that dating makes you happier - all they want to know is if dating you will make them happier.


Another thing I'll give you is my weight. After a year on here, I have discovered that weight is a big issue. A lot of guys won't date overweight women and I've had a couple experiences I'd rather prevent from happening again. So, I'll tell you that my weight is 197 pounds. I'm definitely not thin but I think I'm in a healthy weight range.


All of the above should probably be deleted. You're enhancing and emphasizing what you perceive to be a negative. The reader might not see it the same way. But, in any event, you can make the same point with a better variety of photos, without the written negative undertones.


I play soccer, swim, bike and cross-country ski.


Show this.
 flyover_boy
Joined: 12/28/2016
Msg: 7
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 1/6/2019 6:58:59 PM

My kids are my #1 priority. That being said, I believe that its good to have a social life outside my kids because it makes me a happier person and a better mom.
=======================================

No doubt. But, and this is my opinion only, those reading your profile want to know "ok, what's in it for me?" A crass assessment, I know, but I also believe it's mostly accurate. It really doesn't much matter to the reader that dating makes you happier - all they want to know is if dating you will make them happier.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Another thing I'll give you is my weight. After a year on here, I have discovered that weight is a big issue. A lot of guys won't date overweight women and I've had a couple experiences I'd rather prevent from happening again. So, I'll tell you that my weight is 197 pounds. I'm definitely not thin but I think I'm in a healthy weight range.

==============================================
All of the above should probably be deleted. You're enhancing and emphasizing what you perceive to be a negative. The reader might not see it the same way. But, in any event, you can make the same point with a better variety of photos, without the written negative undertones.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I play soccer, swim, bike and cross-country ski.

=================================

Show this.



+1000 !! Hear...hear !!

Also previously mentioned, the profile text is too lengthy and wordy. It reads more like conditions of a contract and procedures rather than having some fun. You may have serious goals, the reader may as well, but the text isn’t making it easy.
 PennyAnte
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 8
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 1/7/2019 6:56:51 AM
July. Your profile is too long. Men are visual creatures and not many read what you write. They will respond to pictures. You are a beautiful woman. Stunning, and I think you have let past experiences with loser men define you. Don't.

You have full body pictures and you are very proportionate and I would never guess your weight to be 197. That is just a number and no ones business but yours and your doctors. The pictures won't lie. I think you need better photos. Ask a friend for a photo shoot and choose the pictures you like best.

You can use the interest section and make a list there of your favorite activities. These will serve as not only ice breakers for men to comment on but they will also reflect an active lifestyle.

I would simply state the fact that you are a single mother. Some men avoid single mothers completely. Especially if they are of the MGTOW camp and philosophy. You don't have to express that your children are #1. Of course they are and some men may appreciate that. Others will not.

You can set limits and healthy boundaries when and as you get acquainted with them. Everything you put on this bio is not necessarily for everyone to know about you. I think you need to make it brief and ad a little bit of humor.

When I was dating I found more messages about my list of interests than anything I wrote in my profile/about me section. I also found out I could have written complete gibberish and still get messages.

Play up your most positive attributes. You have a beautiful smile, bright pretty eyes, youthful complexion, beautiful hair and a strong healthy body. Use photos to do so. Wear some appealing clothing which defines your style and if you wear make up put on a fresh face and have some fun taking new photos. You say you keep flip flopping on bio content... but I don't think you have changed your pictures in awhile.

Don't divulge too much information about your situation. It will only be important to disclose that to someone you are getting to know as a romantic interest. Be genuine to yourself but that doesn't mean writing your life story here either. Think positive and act accordingly.

I hope you find someone that compliments your life, supports you, cares for you and will love you as much as you love him. Your profile is somewhat self depreciating and I strongly suggest you do not do that to yourself. Ask for what you deserve and desire in your heart of hearts. Stop putting yourself down or making excuses. You are as beautiful as God made you and you deserve his blessings and to be loved.
 Spectrallight
Joined: 9/14/2018
Msg: 9
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 1/7/2019 11:10:45 AM
The profile says to me on a whole do not date me as I don't have any time for you. It's how it comes across. It is just on the borderline of too much to read. Be concise, and say less about things.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 10
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My turn for a torturous profile preview.
Posted: 1/8/2019 9:47:00 AM
Your "about me" section, half of it sounds like a rant and has negative qualifiers that will turn off more people than you want it to....just choose who you want to talk to and leave the heavy, serious stuff out of it for the most part. It could use a rewrite.

All of us could always have better pics, but yours are fine.
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