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 singirl70
Joined: 12/12/2015
Msg: 1
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Wish we could warn each other about bad datesPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I wish we would actually leave a note to tell each other when we have met someone in person and something happened that wasn't about how they looked. I had a date .. I am VERY upfront about not wanting someone with a drug issue and asked him more than once. well first date was good had a nice time.. So 2nd date he didn't realize my bathroom had 2 doors and one wasn't locked. I didn't know he was in there.. I walked in and BAM caught him doing cocaine on my sink!
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 2
Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/9/2019 9:54:24 AM
I'm sure you are a nice lady but you may be doing some things to attract the wrong guys.

For example, half your profile sounds like a rant, you have a lot of tattoos........for starters, you might try cleaning up your profile, going back to church, and easing up on the tattoos so you can attract a better quality man. I'm just sayin'.
 ssm508
Joined: 5/27/2018
Msg: 3
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/9/2019 10:54:54 AM
This idea has been mentioned before. The flaw is how would someone know if the information is true or not. Person A can write bad and false things about person B as a measure of revenge. Because person B was not interested in another date with person A.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 4
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/9/2019 2:07:12 PM

For example, half your profile sounds like a rant, you have a lot of tattoos........for starters, you might try cleaning up your profile, going back to church, and easing up on the tattoos so you can attract a better quality man. I'm just sayin'.


WTF??
Judgmental much?

<< is walking away before she gets herself banned....
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 5
Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/9/2019 3:28:06 PM
Msg 2 is a bizarre response.

I wish we could too. Not sure how it would work though.
And I hate to say it but people generally don’t listen to the bad stuff if they fancy someone.
Not the milder stuff anyway.
Besides don’t you just love breaking eggs while making pancakes :/
 _Cinnamon__Girl_
Joined: 3/28/2016
Msg: 6
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/9/2019 10:12:59 PM
I would not have a guy over to my house on the second date, it's a safety issue.
 aroundthewaygirl
Joined: 12/19/2018
Msg: 7
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 7:53:12 AM
OP, message #2 is from a d****ebag. Don't let him ruin your mood.
Be careful about bringing someone back to your place so soon. I hope you kicked that date to the curb.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 8
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 8:14:22 AM
That is a good question, why did you have him in your house so soon?
 Spectrallight
Joined: 9/14/2018
Msg: 9
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 8:48:45 AM

That is a good question, why did you have him in your house so soon?


This is a pretty common thing to happen. The lady isn't on her own there by far.
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 10
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 9:26:18 AM
most of my dates have invited me over first or second date. OLD is the only dating I have done where we meet at restaurant. all others, I meet at their home, hang out a few and then go out.
 ssm508
Joined: 5/27/2018
Msg: 11
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 9:30:32 AM
In my experience, it was often the 3rd or 4th date I was at a woman's house (or vice versa) for the first time. But that happening on the second date isn't that uncommon.
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 12
Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 10:26:27 AM
Could have took longer to discover he liked a livener if they’d have been out. Male public bathrooms are the one place even the strongest of women fear to tread :)
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 13
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 3:40:50 PM
That profile is NOT doing you any favors. This is coming from a guy who has similar problems talking about myself. Try re-writing all that stuff WITHOUT using words like 'no' or 'not' or 'doesn't' or 'can't'. If it seems nearly impossible, or leaves you with essentially nothing left for content -- then maybe it's time to realize a profile that invites in a nicer type of guy needs to be nicer in tone.

Warning people about bad dates... POF used to have a 'testimonial' section where you could comment on someone after connecting. The reason why that is such a horrible idea is because dates and dating experiences are HIGHLY subjective -- and there are more than a few people who lied just to hurt former relationships, or their 'competition'.

Having such a negative profile and wanting to report bad dates -- seems like someone is rather stuck on the glass half empty side of life. If you can't say something nice about someone (especially yourself) -- you're better off saying nothing at all. If the date does something criminal --- it's not POF you need to warn -- it's the Police.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 14
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 3:51:09 PM

2nd date he didn't realize my bathroom had 2 doors and one wasn't locked. I didn't know he was in there.. I walked in and BAM caught him doing cocaine on my sink!

Most likely: He was in the bathroom for a while, so you went thru the other door, and you saw why it was taking him so long. Thank gawd he wasn't constipated (and leafing thru Victoria's Secret magazine with one hand). Would have been worse. :)

There is never a 100% solution. But what you do is maximize avoiding that while not taking away from your profile. Gut-instinct can make one vent in a profile (as yours does) -- but it doesn't bring good results. You can easily just have a list of likes and dislikes, without venting -- "- Doesn't use any drugs at all".
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 15
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 3:56:30 PM

Wish we could warn each other about bad dates


Probably wouldn't make a whole lot of difference.

Even when information IS available, a lot of people still want to re-invent the wheel over and over again, and make the same mistakes a lot of other people have already made before them.

See the story of "Dirty John".
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 16
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/10/2019 6:25:26 PM

In my experience, it was often the 3rd or 4th date I was at a woman's house (or vice versa) for the first time. But that happening on the second date isn't that uncommon.
I usually wait til at least the 4th date to sneak off into the bathroom and do cocaine. 2nd date is way too soon.


Thank gawd he wasn't constipated
Maybe she would have rather he had constipation problems. I don't see "Must not have ANY gastrointestinal issues!!!" in her list of disqualifiers.

But more seriously, I think it is difficult for financially successful women to find good men in small towns. Everyone knows the transition we're making away from blue collar type careers into service type careers. I don't think it is a secret that this transition favors women, especially educated women because women are more likely to be attracted to service industries which are growing. And it disfavors men, especially middle aged + men, who were more likely to have held blue collar jobs. Especially in rural areas anf small towns. And this transition is hitting smaller towns much harder than cities, and leaving many middle aged men behind, making it difficult to find good work or make a living. Thus the issue we have with drug abuse in rural areas. In a larger populated area, there are more professional men. So women like the OP, in a smallish town, obviously with a good skilled career (not to mention looks)...is having a difficult time.
 Tech30
Joined: 8/11/2017
Msg: 17
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 7:16:49 AM
I toyed with the idea of making a dating site where you could leave reviews of people you have gone out with. People are nuts though and would make up stories about people . It would be tough to pull off.
 _Rise_Above_This_
Joined: 1/14/2018
Msg: 18
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 7:23:27 AM
^^^

Sort of like the forums
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 19
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 7:31:50 AM

I wish we would actually leave a note to tell each other when we have met someone in person and something happened that wasn't about how they looked. I had a date .. I am VERY upfront about not wanting someone with a drug issue and asked him more than once. well first date was good had a nice time.. So 2nd date he didn't realize my bathroom had 2 doors and one wasn't locked. I didn't know he was in there.. I walked in and BAM caught him doing cocaine on my sink!


I can't help myself.
How could you not know he was in your bathroom?
Was he wandering around in your house?
I have 2 bathrooms in my house and I'm aware at all times who's in them,
unless of course there's a mob of people. Did your second date involve a mob of people?
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 20
Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 8:07:35 AM

How could you not know he was in your bathroom?
Was he wandering around in your house?
I have 2 bathrooms in my house and I'm aware at all times who's in them


I was thinking the very same thing. If the two of them were alone in her house, he would have excused himself to use her bathroom. The OP wouldn't have gone looking for him, unless he were taking an inordinate amount of time in there - say more than 15 minutes. Even if that were the case, you'd think she'd knock first.
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 21
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 9:53:56 AM

People are nuts though and would make up stories about people . It would be tough to pull off.
And the OP may realize it would be a double edged sword…he’d be out there saying “B*tch walked in on me in the bathroom when I was doing my business!!”


I have 2 bathrooms in my house and I'm aware at all times who's in them,
That’s nice to know. What do you have, a ..um…data logger (NPI) or some type of sensor on the bathroom doors to keep track of comings and goings (again NPI) from the bathrooms?


The OP wouldn't have gone looking for him, unless he were taking an inordinate amount of time in there - say more than 15 minutes.
I had coupla dates with a women who, on the first date in a restaurant, excused herself and was gone for an hour. Really. First date, I didn’t know what to say as I am aware there could have been some “female issues,” so I didn’t say anything. And she offered no reason. 2nd date, same thing, maybe over an hour. Sheesh. I asked, she said she wasn’t feeling well, and laid down in there. I was aware some woman’s bathrooms do have some type of bench or whatever, so again, I didn’t pry more than that. I started to think she was along for the meals (YES I did buy), and didn’t want to be seen with me, or talk to me. Later I found she was bulimic, early stages, where she still appeared healthy. A little on the thin side but healthy appearing. She was an aspiring model, had some gigs, and certainly had that look so I didn’t think too much about her being a bit thin. Later I heard she died in her 30’s.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 22
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 10:11:29 AM

I walked in and BAM caught him doing cocaine on my sink!


The only thing worse would be catching him doing blow off of a hooker's ass...
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 23
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 10:51:37 AM

That’s nice to know. What do you have, a ..um…data logger (NPI) or some type of sensor on the bathroom doors to keep track of comings and goings (again NPI) from the bathrooms?


That is wicked funny.
I guess others have dates that disappear in their house and they have no clue
where they've gone...it's just never happened to me. If I have company over, I
usually do know where they are...why wouldn't I, ya fruitloop.

And if I do have sensors in my house...why would I use NPI?
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 24
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 11:00:05 AM
Someone confined under House Arrest can still host a party - just fit everyone with an ankle tracker, so nobody is the wiser...
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 25
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Wish we could warn each other about bad dates
Posted: 2/11/2019 12:33:27 PM
BrownEyes wrote:


I guess others have dates that disappear in their house and they have no clue
where they've gone
Don’t they assume they usually go in the toilet?


.it's just never happened to me. If I have company over, I
usually do know where they are...why wouldn't I
But how do you know if they are in the bathroom versus looking at your décor in the guest room ...or getting fresh air out on your deck? Vs. the bathroom?


And if I do have sensors in my house...why would I use NPI?.
You’re “aware at all times” of who’s in your bathroom. Sounds like big bathroom brother to me. ;) And doesn’t have to be a data logger, or any other type of logger. Maybe a splash sensor, or maybe a flatulence detector that sends data to your cell phone app via the cloud. Just not the same cloud that is in your bathroom. Just have your volume turned down when that notification arrives, if your're among polite company. lol
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