Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Why women chase after being rejected?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 1
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I rejected a decently attractive looking women numerous times, after initially "signaling" her my interest. It was a mistake on my part. But I can't get her off me now. She chases hard and won't stop. I don't want her, it's a big turn off. I wanna know why she does this? It's like an obsession and has been going on for several months.
 am70sguy
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 2
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 1:22:36 AM
You can always block her. The prettier the person, the more unwilling they are to accept that somebody could actually not be interested in them so spend some time in pursuit to prove it just can't be true.
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 3
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 1:40:50 AM
I tend to find the reverse is true.
The ‘prettier’ a person is, the more insecure they are.
I’m not saying this like it’s a general rule, it couldn’t be. But I have observed this over the years with some people.

I wonder why the OP even put ‘decently attractive’ it serves no purpose to say it, other than the obvious, and that’s unattractive.
Are you talking online OP? because that’s easier to ignore
Real world not so much.
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 1:52:13 AM
Its real world, at work. I cannot choose to not go there.

I wrote attractive because I know from experience some relatively unattractive women get their hopes up really high if they are given attention. What I'm saying is, this is a woman who probably already gets loads of attention from other men (and women), and one would assume she has plenty of fish in her pond to choose from.
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 1:54:12 AM
So I'm just confused why a woman lingers on like this?
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 6
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 2:08:38 AM
It has nothing to do with someone’s physical appearance.
It’s a mental issue.

You might have to get harsh to get them off your back.
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 7
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 2:55:09 AM

after initially "signaling" her my interest


Well you did the signal thing so now she has encoded on you like a duckling.

Just kidding. It all sounds goofy.

A woman at work? Not smart. You are reaping what you sowed.

We have no idea what is going on. We aren't in her head or yours.
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 8
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 2:57:47 AM
^^ why even bother replying then?
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 9
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 3:33:25 AM
Because I can.


Messages this short may not be posted
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 10
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 4:26:00 AM
It has been my experience.................the "message" delivered in polite terms, "Being nice" is often ignored.
I have learned to deliver the, "I'm done" / "We're over"/ "Do not attempt to contact me again", message with a certain, somewhat evil look in my eyes, tilting my head forward slightly, glaring over the rim of my glasses. THIS............ sends the message, read loud and clear.
I do not deliver/send a "mixed" message. I say what I mean and mean what I say. "Because I can." Works well for me!

Oh I forgot, I avoid any "behind the scenes" involvement with co-workers. Damn good rule! No cause for "She said/ He said". No need for anyone to run off to HR. One less cause for drama.
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 5:50:37 AM
Oh, no!! Poor irresistible you. You can't get rid of these women? Women are like greyhounds chasing a stuffed rabbit. Once you have their attention, there is not much you can do to dissuade them. They are simpletons really, somehow capable only of recognizing interest, but not rejection, as your thread title seems to suggest.

There are a couple of options:

When she is chasing you "hard," stand in front of a solid wall. Just keep standing there until the last minute ... DO NOT FLINCH!
I used to have to do this with a crazy Appaloosa we had that inevitably tried to run me down every time I entered the pasture.
Anyway, at the last second, step aside and she will run into the wall, knocking herself out. She will likely forget all about her interest in you when she comes to. Simple creatures, really ...

As far as your experience with all those "relatively unattractive women [that] get their hopes up really high if they are given attention," maybe you have to ask yourself why you keep showering attention on women if you are not attracted to them. After all, you acknowledge the decently attractive looking woman is probably bi-sexual (at least in your fertile imagination, since she gets loads of attention from other men AND women).
Why not make it clear that you are conflicted about your interest in same-gender couplings?
As a gemini, this duality - where you think you are attracted to women, but you aren't - is something you will have to learn to live with.

Short of these options, you could fall on a hot poker, gouging your eye out, though I fear the resultant eye patch would merely add to your mysterious cachet, thereby back-firing on you. Aaarggh!
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 6:11:06 AM

When she is chasing you "hard," stand in front of a solid wall. Just keep standing there until the last minute ... DO NOT FLINCH!
I used to have to do this with a crazy Appaloosa we had that inevitably tried to run me down every time I entered the pasture.
Anyway, at the last second, step aside and she will run into the wall, knocking herself out. She will likely forget all about her interest in you when she comes to. Simple creatures, really .

 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 13
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 7:22:23 AM
Why would you send signals to a woman you're not interested in, then complain when she can't figure out your interest level in her? Seems to me that she is not the one with the communication issues here. You are.
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 14
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 9:44:58 AM

I rejected a decently attractive looking women numerous times, after initially "signaling" her my interest. It was a mistake on my part. But I can't get her off me now. She chases hard and won't stop. I don't want her, it's a big turn off. I wanna know why she does this? It's like an obsession and has been going on for several months.


OP. If you have not been able to resolve this over several months, I would strongly suggest that you are enjoying the chase and your topic does not merit discussion.
 ssm508
Joined: 5/27/2018
Msg: 15
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 1:31:50 PM
Some people are just unable to move on or they might think if they try harder, the other person will become interested.


Oh I forgot, I avoid any "behind the scenes" involvement with co-workers. Damn good rule! No cause for "She said/ He said". No need for anyone to run off to HR. One less cause for drama.


I think dating co-workers should be looked at on a case by case basis. Yes it can be a calculated risk. However not all situations or circumstances are necessarily the same. I do know people that are married or in relationships with someone that was a co-worker when they first started dating.
 dondea
Joined: 12/10/2007
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 5:07:14 PM
I agree ssm508. Years ago I dated several coworkers over the years until I was put in supervisory positions. After that, it was a definite no-no. With the MeeToo# crapola, I'm glad I'm still married and don't have to worry about it.
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 17
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/12/2019 11:10:58 PM
I was interested in her initially but got turned off very soon. It was my mistake to give attention in the first place and I admit its a mess to cleanup now.

I will probably tell her off "nicely" in person, but I'm curious why a woman would chase or keep her hopes up for this long?

I've made this mistake before many times and they usually let to after a couple weeks, so I'm just curious why she hasnt?
 AnxiousCrustacean
Joined: 12/17/2018
Msg: 18
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/13/2019 12:09:38 AM

I've made this mistake before many times and they usually let to (sic) after a couple weeks, so I'm just curious why she hasnt?


Because not all women are the same.
 FilaFubu
Joined: 2/6/2019
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/13/2019 5:09:57 AM
^^ Care to explain further?
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/13/2019 12:27:31 PM
Why not just ask her?
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 21
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/13/2019 2:55:50 PM

I was interested in her initially but got turned off very soon. It was my mistake to give attention in the first place and I admit its a mess to cleanup now.

I will probably tell her off "nicely" in person, but I'm curious why a woman would chase or keep her hopes up for this long?

I've made this mistake before many times and they usually let to after a couple weeks, so I'm just curious why she hasnt?


Since you showed interest in her initially, maybe she thinks you're just playing hard-to-get? Just be honest with her and explain to her why you got turned off - unless you secretly enjoy the attention, as someone else suggested.
 MyTrueCompanion
Joined: 9/20/2018
Msg: 22
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/15/2019 1:03:55 PM

I can't get her off me now. She chases hard and won't stop


Does she keep "thanking" you for 1 date?
 outlawcafe
Joined: 12/4/2018
Msg: 23
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/18/2019 5:11:15 AM
Wow.

If a man tells me he isn't interested, doesn't want a relationship, doesn't know what he wants, etc, I believe him and just walk away.

Sounds to me like Ms. Hottie has some psychological issues and is a Level 5 whack job if she can't seem to get the hint. If she harasses you further, get law enforcement involved if you feel your safety is in peril.

Yes, there ARE women stalkers out here. But that being said.....you may want to look for other opportunities for our career and hopefully, you have learned your lesson about trying to fish off the company pier. In other words.....NEVER dip your pen into the company ink!!!!!
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 24
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/18/2019 9:47:30 AM
have only ever "chased" one man. He was my first boy-friend and he dumped me and it was a shock as I thought everything had been going so well and it had felt so good being with him. He dumped me with a phonecall while I was at work and I was blindsided. Tried phoning him, left long rambling messages on his phone and emails. I did this for about two weeks and then I decided I had to stop. I accepted it and quit contacting him.

I think a woman chases a man because she wants to feel a certain way again. When a man you are really attracted to and like shows interest in you, it is such an exhilarating feeling. And when he ends things it hurts. Its particularly bad when you haven't been able to feel that way before or its been a long time. For some women, if they know they can easily get someone of that calibre (their perception that he's of a certain calibre) they can move on easier. But if you are someone who hasn't had a lot of guys of what she perceives as good for her, there is a feeling that this was the one shot she had to get a good guy. She perceives that there aren't more good fish in the sea for her. So she will pursue the guy, holding onto the fact that since you did once show interest in her that there's a chance he might still see something in you. And stopping the chasing might seem to her that she's accepting being alone and unhappy
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 25
view profile
History
Why women chase after being rejected?
Posted: 2/18/2019 9:52:55 AM
I want to add that maybe you need to tell her WHY you were turned off and that there's nothing she can do to change your mind. Its hard to accept a breakup or rejection when you don't know why you were rejected.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Why women chase after being rejected?