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 Kokanee_Ice
Joined: 2/16/2019
Msg: 1
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I have trouble getting replies from my first messages on this site. I have tried writing out well-thought out messages that mentioned something in a woman’s profile. They never seemed to get replies, so I decided to try something different. I asked a woman if she would like to go for a drink and see live music all in emojis. The reply I got was, “No thanks. Try writing out a real message instead of stupid emojis.” Well, if writing out long, detailed messages doesn’t work, what’s wrong with trying something different? I am totally capable of writing well; I wrote a 50-page thesis. It’s not that I’m stupid; it’s that I had to change my approach. Sometimes you just need to catch a woman’s attention, and often a long, detailed message doesn’t do that.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 2
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/7/2019 1:20:24 PM

Sometimes you just need to catch a woman’s attention


"Sometimes"?

More like the overwhelming majority of the time.

I don't see a lot of awareness out there, self or otherwise.
 spectravision
Joined: 3/20/2019
Msg: 3
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/7/2019 1:30:37 PM
Jesus, Know your worth ffs. You're a decent looking guy.

Go back into the day to day and ask em out. Middle finger to pof, aye!
 Kokanee_Ice
Joined: 2/16/2019
Msg: 4
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/7/2019 2:20:19 PM
^^^ Except I’m clueless about where to meet women. I’ve done meetup.com, volunteering, and taken language courses. In meetups people are more focused on the topic than they are getting to know a new person. Volunteering is basically a bunch of retired people. In my Japanese language course the women didn’t seem interested in me. In all these activities women seem to socialize more with other women than with men. You pretty much need to get a woman alone to ask her out, and in a big group that can be impossible.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 5
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/7/2019 5:21:47 PM
often preceding to quickly and casually is an issue, first message that assume anything beyond hey something about you has fCaught my interest even utilizing baby, sexy, beautiful;are irritating, saying i find etc beautiful one thing. In first contacts i will express whatever discomfort if any with the message, honestly attempting interaction. there have been times the forwardness has caused a overtly curt, response from me, bordering reactionary. However respect ,given to my discomfort expressed can brings one into almost unicorn status or just nice person, or a brick wall..
I get trying different approaches, however, real name, real life, introductions and information exchange with standard expressed interest needs be established b for sleuthing a pictogram. Now, if our profile headline or the information was a pictogram and a woman responded warmly and expressed interest prior to receiving said picto gram asking for a date that way -might have been reminiscent of childhood boy/ girl insecure crush games and endearing.
otherwise just fricken , antics reeks of desperation, strategy development is a game. your end goal: (key word) you express clearly get, go on a date. the goal needs be how can i find joy in reaching, out to strangers and taking the risk on a real interest.
because it doesn't matter, it isn't the end all be a, when it clicks, you will be satisfied with whatever connection takes place, personal investment in a relationship, cannot be established prior to the development of such. its not the resale property investment option, it is home for your heart, right now your heart has a home it owns, you want to determine a strategy or antic to get a housemate but we make homes with those we love.
 MeramecRiverRat
Joined: 10/12/2017
Msg: 6
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/10/2019 6:40:20 AM
Emojis are lame. Don't use any in a first message.

The only way emojis might work is if the sender uses bold ones such as eggplant or peach. Need a great looking main pic and still might have a low success rate.

In later messages, an occasional smile or wink might be ok. The girl might include a kissing one.

Asking someone out in a first message is bad. Better too soon than too late, but it's foolish to ask to meet when you haven't communicated at all.

You're right about long detailed messages not working. The pattern of thoughtful messages based on their profile doesn't work. Men who have sent messages online for years tend to say they do better with shorter first messages, or their success rate doesn't get worse when they go to shorter messages. He had her at hello.

Having the word "sexuality" in your profile isn't wise. Seeing any form of "sex" in profile text might get them to hit the back button or swipe no.

Your age isn't ideal for volunteering or meetup. Volunteers are the old people you mention and youths. Maybe one of the geezers has a single daughter, or one of the youths has a single aunt. Most of the people in Meetup events in my area are over 50, sometimes way over 50. The only Meetups with younger adults are work related groups where it wouldn't be appropriate to hit on someone (one of the computer groups I'm in has specific rules against flirting or other behavior that might cause discomfort). Some Meetup groups have age limits under 30. People in their 40s are in a peerless zone.

My brother and his wife met in a class. If a girl in your class is interested, she might sit by you or start a conversation before or after class. Most likely you'll have to make the first move.

Back to emojis. Profiles with a bunch of emojis showing their interests tend to be lame, though they can show incompatibility, for example airplane and wine glass. I've seen profiles where she actually has dealbreaker emojis, sometimes communicating those things as bad with a thumbs-down emoji.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 7
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/10/2019 8:36:34 AM

“No thanks. Try writing out a real message instead of stupid emojis.”

Tell her to frack off. Believe it or not but if she carpet bombed that message you would get some replies. If she felt attracted to you enough..she wouldn't care. Messages are the most meaningless of the 3 pillars(pics,profiles,messages). I will post what you should write her back below!
emojis do sound childish. Might work on under 22 though.


Except I’m clueless about where to meet women.

Try more single/dating related groups. The Japanese class was a bad idea actually to try meet women. If you are both majoring in the same career, law for example, women are more likely to want to know you since that is networking opportunity and people date often those in similar careers.
I suspect a Japanese language course would be full of men who want to date Japanese women so want to learn language, and women who might be attracted to Japanese guys. Since most schools won't allow Japanese speakers into a Japanese language class it won't happen in class.

No homo but your a good looking guy, especially in your age group. This should be getting easier for you after 40 since for guys just being in shape after 40 lifts your perceived value in online dating. IF YOU WERE A 6 BEFORE YOU BECOME LIKE AN 8 because of less competition.

In other words there will be a certain % of hot women who are attracted to you but you just aren't finding them or saying the right things or presenting with right profile that works for your audience!
 Kokanee_Ice
Joined: 2/16/2019
Msg: 8
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/10/2019 1:22:31 PM
^^^ Joe, a lot of Japanese women like quiet guys like me. I’m only loud online. The thing is, they always expect a man to pay. They are also very success-oriented. When the Japanese economy crashed a lot of them left their husbands. Japan is still very much stuck in sexism. When I took a course years ago there were a lot of cute girls, not all Japanese, who were into anime and manga. I think women my age would be past that phase now.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 9
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/10/2019 1:30:16 PM
^^^
I agree they often like quiet guys and IMHO don't mind paying since they have money. My friend is married to a Japanese girl, and her parents gave like a 25k gift of cash. I also know Navy guys that dated them when stationed in that region.

What I meant is that you will most likely not meet Japanese women in a Japanese language class unless things are different in Canada. In my school system they wouldn't let me study Russian or Italian because it is considered my ethnic languages and it isn't considered fair since I am suppose to study a new language I didn't know. Thank god I pasted the Spanish regents test!
What happens here are the Polish girls and Bulgarian girls take the Russian course since it will be easier for them to master.
 spectravision
Joined: 3/20/2019
Msg: 10
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/10/2019 6:16:41 PM

Except I’m clueless about where to meet women.


Everywhere. If you're out and about walk about smiling or with a grin. It will be one of the best things you can do. Do that for a while and you will catch a lot more women staring at you. It will make you more approachable even while waiting to be served for grocery shopping.

Women aren't as obvious as Men so use Shop window reflections to check out whether you're getting eyed up. Don't give up on it straight away. Remember a lot of Women are thinking about what is for the kids tea tonight etc. But you will catch a lot more Women looking you up and down and all sorts like checking your bits out and staring lol.

30 day trial starts now ;)

 Kokanee_Ice
Joined: 2/16/2019
Msg: 11
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/11/2019 10:37:07 AM

Everywhere. If you're out and about walk about smiling or with a grin. It will be one of the best things you can do. Do that for a while and you will catch a lot more women staring at you. It will make you more approachable even while waiting to be served for grocery shopping.


Actually not as many as you think. When you eliminate the married women, the women with boyfriends, and the women who are a lot older or younger than me, you get pretty slim pickings.
 spectravision
Joined: 3/20/2019
Msg: 12
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/11/2019 10:59:04 AM
You're quite the optimist lol. Why always think of negatives when the positive is confidence building.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 13
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/11/2019 7:12:11 PM
^^I 'm with spectra, was ready to give the response he got answering his emoji fab intro. lol what to do what do? lol
 celeste_bella
Joined: 12/11/2017
Msg: 14
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Writing a message in emojis
Posted: 4/11/2019 8:51:11 PM
Sometimes you just need to catch a woman’s attention, and often a long, detailed message doesn’t do that.

Brevity is the soul of wit.
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