Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Why aren't relationships 50/50      Home login  
Joined: 7/18/2005
Msg: 2
Why aren't relationships 50/50 Page 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
This thread is going to go into overtime. Let the posts pile on!
 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 3
view profile
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/25/2005 5:36:12 PM
What are we talking here? Reciprocation? Measurements? I'm lost man...
Joined: 7/18/2005
Msg: 9
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/25/2005 5:52:29 PM
Shappy, people who are 10%-ers will always gravitate towards the 90%-ers. And vice versa. If you are giving 75%, you will naturally attract the 25% women. That is how nature balances out the mating game. Now you may say you are a 50% guy, so how come you can't find a 50% woman? That is because the 50%-ers are a rare breed.
Joined: 7/18/2005
Msg: 12
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/25/2005 5:57:56 PM
Good scenario. That's very realistic. That is the crap Nice Guys traditionally get stuck with. It works for both genders. You are a 90% guy, so you attracted a 10% woman.
Joined: 4/14/2005
Msg: 17
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/25/2005 6:35:55 PM
That depends on you.
Joined: 7/18/2005
Msg: 22
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/25/2005 6:46:53 PM
50% means you meet people half way. If both parties go all the way, then they will pass each other! You meet your love half way and that is the ideal.
 Knight Rider
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 32
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 9/26/2005 2:50:22 AM
if you both respect each others space,and are considerate of each others wants
and needs not to mention feelings,then you're on your way to a 50/50

Knight Rider!
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 42
view profile
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/13/2005 12:12:11 PM
No relationship is ever truly 50/50. If you have the "b!tch" personality, you're always going to get the short end of the stick.
Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 51
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/13/2005 2:39:25 PM
Sounds like a good boy thread .

Yup in the profiles women seem to want more "stuff" than guys , most guys just want a regular warm body to use , we are so simple ,
Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 56
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/14/2005 9:21:52 AM
No , the women we run into actually make us that way dude ,

I used to drive a hillbilly truck and was not very well versed in clothing style , my friends were in the same boat , , guess what we did not date , we were like the plague to all women we met , one guy wised up , got some good shoes style and the car , everything changed , I asked him how he changed , he told me that women would tell him over and over what to change , even the job , even women here on a job thread told some guys to change their jobs to be more marketable .

It took me a while to get it , but found out it was true and those attraction tools were important to most women wanting a long term relationship , older women and women that that it hard in this thread would probably say "no True " and/or "not me " . The reality is always different when you are at the receiving end of it .

When I was married, my wife and I ( may she rest in peace ) always had communication helped eachother like one would with a life long sibling or best friend , nothing was measured in 50 / 50 itjust happened , both being so used to being enthusiastic in doing everything for eachother , I was the nice guy , here we call him the spineless nice guy that lived to please ,( men and women here say that ) every day was like christmas , full of gifts and effortless self giving liike an enthusiastic puppy dog, she was the same , the nice girl that did everything for me like as if life depended on it . We always communicated everything , nothing was denied eachother , even strange sexual things , hehehe .

In the years we were married we never had a fight never a small one , people thought that was weird .

It is not about being 50 / 50 , it is about giving to eachother's life partner everything and all untill it hurt .

I thought all women were as sane and giving as her and I thought all men were supposed to be the typical nice guy like I was , I thought that was what women wanted found out that was not true and that I suck , the vast majority of women are not like her , now I see them that most suck , I suck as a person for being a nice guy and perceived as a spineless wuss .

I have found that the reality is that everyone , men and women want to get most of the percentage in life , not the measurement as a scale but most of the goodies for themselves , alot of women want that the guy gives al his effort in life in wealth and social success and the man wants to get the most sex and keep a women that can look like a trophy while she is mother , wife and servant , that is the reality ..


If I find one as nice as my wife was , I will kill darth and go back to the way I was , being a badboy player or a wanna be is to be ahead of the game , to winnall the goodies in life .

It is not and should not be about a measured percentage , it is to actually love eachother , give eachother until it hurts , death until they part .
Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 57
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/14/2005 10:26:07 AM
everyone got quiet , hehehe
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 60
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/14/2005 12:09:15 PM
maybe you haven't noticed what other people have done for you. it's easy to take someone for granted.
Joined: 1/9/2005
Msg: 71
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/14/2005 10:36:50 PM
Women don't want a 50/50 guy. If that is your goal, then be a 51/49 guy. it's hella better than 50/50. Be an alpha male. Save the 50/50 crap for like the 20th date.
Joined: 12/5/2005
Msg: 77
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 12/15/2005 8:58:13 AM
Not 50/50... 100/100, thats when they can be expected to not fail. And in this case, 100/100 means a 100% irrespective of the other side, without expectations in the near term. Over longer terms, however, one then might be able to see a pattern and then decide if the relationship is worth it or not...

Just my 2 cents...

Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 90
view profile
Posted: 6/2/2018 7:12:27 AM
You might as well draw-up a moratorium until we mutually and equally decide who gives what and just split the fugger down the middle. I will calculate how much I put into monetarily, sexually, socially, emotionally, and everything else, then, I'll will compare with your numbers. Next we can just individually tally up what we have spent on each other for gifts, sex, bills, meals, utilities, and use tape to decide which half of the house is mine and which is yours and call it even Steven. We can go ahead and forgo the relationship and move on the better situation.
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 91
view profile
Posted: 6/2/2018 8:20:17 AM
If you want a 50 50 relationship, pick a partner who is your equal. That has always worked for me.

I am an alpha who being an alpha would only get into a relationship with another alpha. Maybe being alpha means it would never have occurred to us that being anything other than 50 50 was possible for us.

If people worry about giving more than they are getting, why are they in the relationship in the first place?

We teach people how to treat us.
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 92
view profile
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 6/2/2018 1:26:21 PM
Clue ya in,,, NO relationship, of any sort will EVER be a 50/50. A relationship is a give and take.
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 93
view profile
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 6/2/2018 1:26:40 PM
Clue ya in,,, NO relationship, of any sort will EVER be a 50/50. A relationship is a give and take.
oops double post
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 94
b/c only hindsight is 20/20
Posted: 6/2/2018 5:01:55 PM
even if you find the perfect partner, something may go wrong in their life, and you need to be the single footprints on the sand.
Joined: 5/17/2018
Msg: 95
b/c only hindsight is 20/20
Posted: 6/2/2018 5:14:20 PM
There is no such thing as the perfect partner even if they start off that way life changes people, money changes people, as we are ever changing by nature and learn to adapt to our surroundings.

I keep things equal in my relationships/dating cause if their not I won't continue there is no one up with me where they think themselves above me I keep their reality in check. It's done right from the start of dating a lady approaches me I reciprocate it back, I offer to pay if she doesn't even attempt to reciprocate it's pretty good chance that will be your relationship you doing her receiving you have to define balance setting boundaries on where things stand. Most guys and ladies don't they see what they can get to their benefit not weighing out all the factors as a whole.

Guy does everything on a date up to sex woman has sex says were even. How does sex of mutual benefit counter balance, approach, asking, paying that isn't even close in basic mathematics where do you think it is. Let's count together here shall we!

Guy approaches women ask to meet
Guy meets lady goes good ask for date
Guy takes lady out and pays for date
Guy and lady have sex she says were even? WTF!! You believe that sh!t? You bought the swamp land I sold in Florida didn't you? You know it wasn't mine to sell right? There is 3 benefits to lady, one mutual what is your benefit exactly? Her presence? So you are saying to her you are going to pay for her time? Really you think your on the same plane think common sense here, she has already 3 -0 you and you believe the sex means some equality and you allow that sh!t! Your just great with mathematics.
Joined: 12/2/2014
Msg: 96
view profile
Why aren't relationships 50/50
Posted: 6/2/2018 6:07:57 PM

NO relationship will EVER be 50/50

50 / 50 is an equal relationship ~ as long as 100 % is reached. It may not matter, the individual fraction that gets it there.

^^^ All very successful relationships are 50 / 50 ... Both bringing to the table , many things of value to offer each other. For one it may be " work ethic " possibly, for the other maybe " money management "
( ^ random examples, of which there are many ~ in addition, the strength of a persons love alone ~ may be a huge percentage towards the "100% " goal )

..... Then there is the concept & reality of mutual love and respect, which each partner shows the other ~ the glue which bonds the relationship, this can surely be a 50 / 50 percentage, resulting in " give & take " ...

Granted, one person may offer more - or different specific items then the other. But in the " REAL" value, it ends up an equal contribution from both.
..... It is when one party feels the other ( for whatever reason ) is not contributing their 50% to the 100% relationships need ~ the relationship begins the spiral, toward a future separation.

heart / sun
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Why aren't relationships 50/50