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 AUTHOR
 JayJay2006
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 1
Stop being a NICE guyPage 1 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
I know i might get flames for saying this but....nice guys will always finish last in the dating game.

I used to be a nice guy in my younger days. but after getting some practice with women Ive learned what they want....... Don't ever listen to what they say they want(in fact dont listen to anything a woman says), they only think they want this or that. I know some of you would rather not hear this but it will work with every girl..... Act**** but not overly arrogant...Tease women but watch the way your voice tone is, just do it jokingly and they will laugh. They think it's funny and it shows her that you are not worried about what she thinks. You are the man, do what makes YOU happy. If you want to take a girl out YOU decide where to go don't EVER allow her tell you where she wants to go. After all, YOU are the man, you are the king and don't ever let anyone tell you that you are not. Don't ever ever ever let anyone dictate/and effect your self esteem...

Women do NOT want "nice guys",this is a fact... and what I mean by nice guys are the guys who are overly sensitive,guys who listen to slow sad music. the guys who let the girl make the decisions/ and wear tha pants, the guy who tells her he loves her after hardly knowing her, the guy who gives her compliments and so forth. Whatever you do don't ever act like you really like her, NEVER ever tell her how you feel about her and NEVER tell her she is beautiful.(NEVER) She will take advantage of your niceness as a form of "weakness" to her because she knows inside that she can now control you..... She knows she has a grip on you since you like her so much and you will be puddy in a womens hands if you are like this. Make sure you don't go out and spend $200 on a date and don't go out buying her a ton of presents either....

I know deep inside you just want to treat her like a princess and be "nice" to her but it will never work my friend. I'm not trying to say be a jerk to women but just be yourself and be confident. When I say be yourself that does not mean let your emotions flood out to her either. If you want to go hang out with your male friends, DO IT! You don't need her approval for anything......shoot.

The key is to be confident my brotha and this applies to all the men out here. I know that this may not sound good or philosophic to you at first but I know you all are having some trouble with women so I just want to give some advice to my fellows on what women REALLY want in a man. Look back at our great ancestors and you will see they were no sissy boys, they took control of everything!!!! They were kings!!

Another thing is it's not a good sign if women are saying how nice you are, I'd rather have women jumping all over me and telling me how hot I am than being called "nice" and letting the other guys get the women.

..
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 2
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 8:26:35 AM
Well, guess what?!
I'm not going to flame you.

I'm going to agree with you.

Stop pretending to be nice.


I'm going to make an effort in that direction myself.

Nice has never worked for me yet so I'm going to concentrate on becoming a total ****.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 5
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 9:07:45 AM
JayJay, I'm not going to flame you. I can tell you are speaking from hurt. It's ok man, we all go through rejection, but how we deal with that rejection is the truest measure of who we are. I know that deep down inside there's a really great guy that just want's his affection returned, am I right?


Don't ever listen to what they say they want(in fact dont listen to anything a woman says), they only think they want this or that.


It's a fact that most PEOPLE, not just women, don't know what they want. Understanding this takes a lot of self reflection and I think that quite frankly, most are afraid of what they may find when they take a hard look at themselves.


Tease women but watch the way your voice tone is, just do it jokingly and they will laugh. They think it's funny and it shows her that you are not worried about what she thinks. You are the man, do what makes YOU happy. If you want to take a girl out YOU decide where to go don't EVER allow her tell you where she wants to go. After all, YOU are the man, you are the king and don't ever let anyone tell you that you are not. Don't ever ever ever let anyone dictate/and effect your self esteem...


What you are aiming at here is self confidence, but you are going about it the wrong way. It shouldn't have to be an act my friend. You have to love the man you are. Once you do that, women will notice it in the way you talk and walk, trust me.


Women do NOT want "nice guys",this is a fact... and what I mean by nice guys are the guys who are overly sensitive,guys who listen to slow sad music. the guys who let the girl make the decisions/ and wear tha pants, the guy who tells her he loves her after hardly knowing her, the guy who gives her compliments and so forth.


Sounds to me as if you are describing a jellyfish (no backbone), not a 'nice' guy. I actually agree with you here for the most part, women don't want an overly sensitive man. Remember that scene in Bedeviled with Brandon Fraiser when he is crying at the sunset and the girl ends up leaving with the jocks?


Whatever you do don't ever act like you really like her, NEVER ever tell her how you feel about her and NEVER tell her she is beautiful.(NEVER) She will take advantage of your niceness as a form of "weakness" to her because she knows inside that she can now control you..... She knows she has a grip on you since you like her so much and you will be puddy in a womens hands if you are like this. Make sure you don't go out and spend $200 on a date and don't go out buying her a ton of presents either....


Maybe you are just dating the wrong kind of woman?
Perhaps your compliments aren't sincere and they can tell?
I dunno. Of course some people are always going to take advantage of good people, this shouldn't come as a shock to you. If you are looking for something deep and meaningful you will have to be more selective about who you date. 99.9999% of the general population is not going to work for you, just accept it. This doesn't make women evil. And don't EVER spend $200 on a first date! What's the point? Most women are going to think you are trying to buy them and be cautious of your true intentions. Too many men tend to think that spending a lot of money on a woman should assure them sex. This is not only ugly, but very shallow as well.


I'm not trying to say be a jerk to women but just be yourself and be confident. When I say be yourself that does not mean let your emotions flood out to her either. If you want to go hang out with your male friends, DO IT! You don't need her approval for anything......shoot.


Exactly
See, I knew before I even read this that there was a decent guy screaming to get out. It's easy to blame women when we get rejected, but it takes true courage to pick yourself back up and continue striving to be a great man.


Look back at our great ancestors and you will see they were no sissy boys, they took control of everything!!!! They were kings!!


Doh! You were doing so good...
This statement says to me that you see control and confidence as one and the same. They aren't my friend. True confidence is when we can still be comfortable even when we are out of control.


I'd rather have women jumping all over me and telling me how hot I am than being called "nice" and letting the other guys get the women.


Then perhaps what you really want right now is sex, not a relationship, and that's ok.
Where I think you are getting frustrated is when you date women that are looking for a serious relationship. They aren't looking for sex mate, at least not right off the bat. Seek women that only want a friendship with a physical aspect and you will be much happier I think. Good luck
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 9
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 10:57:08 AM
I am not a nice guy - I have never been a nice guy. Yet, no shortage of women. Women say they want "honesty, trustworthy, sensitive, blah blah" and it is total horsesh1t. I message girls all the time that say 'no' to guys like me, and 2 hours later we are meeting at Starbucks for our first date.

Girls, for the most part, want attention. Bad boys give the attention in a more aggressive and clear manner than good guys who try to be romantic. Bad guys says "you are hot - great tits - I can't wait to fuk you" and girls are flattered - wether they take up the offer or not.

Nice Guys Finish Last!
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 11
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:02:25 AM
sigh...nobody noticed my sarcasm
 Lazyboyz
Joined: 8/15/2005
Msg: 12
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:07:15 AM
10:00 take ur own ass to the club - aint pickin ya up
11:00 ya like that?
12:00 I'm pissed - urrrrrrrpp!! let's blow this popstand
01:00 driver!, If I wanted the scenic route I'd have asked for it - got things/someone to do!
02:00 now that's what I'm talkin' about!
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 13
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:08:13 AM
Yet if a woman had posted those things she's a slut eh?
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 16
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:16:39 AM
Geez, you make the word 'slut' sound bad.

I love chicks who are sluts. I am a slut myself. I don't see anything wrong with the word.

Slut = knows they want sex and remove the barriers to that sex
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 18
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:18:55 AM
Oh trust me hon.......

I can be one mean biotch.
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 21
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:22:53 AM
KK We'll refer to you as a man-ho then
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 23
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:29:59 AM
Babylonia - why do girls always think guys like me are not being themselves? Very optimistic of you. But, sorry to say that I am what I present myself to be. No hidden child - no sensitive side

Maybe when I am in T.O. in December, we can hook up and you can see for yourself!
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 26
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:33:11 AM
manOman...just be yourself as you have been doing already.....


Stop being pushovers....you can still be nice.
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 28
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:37:56 AM
Babylonia - big trouble would probably be big fun with a chick like you. You would chew a 'nice guy' up and toss him out. You need someone who can handle your wild side, and no good boy is going to do that for you.
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 30
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:45:14 AM
The nice guy is the one who says "whatever you want, dear", "wherever you want to go is fine", "I just want you to be happy"...blah blah puke.

Women are attracted to assertiveness, not agreeableness. They like the chair pulled out for them, the car door opened for them, the man to pay for the date, etc - all these are events that give the man control.
 HB2
Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 31
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:47:13 AM
No that's being a pushover^^^^^^^

Nice is lets compromise but can be assertive when he needs to.
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 34
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 11:53:42 AM

When will people stop confusing "nice guys" with "needy guys". The problem is women don't want to hurt a guys feelings so they say your just to nice.


That is so true darth!!! I love to meet the nice guys the needy guys are the ones that scare me A LOT!!

Nice guy= opening doors for you, giving you a flower hand picked or bought doesn't matter just something to let you know that you are special, holding you hand to help you out of the car. Letting you know that they are thinking about you.

Needy guy= Calling you 10 times a day to let you know that they are thinking about you. Stalking you at bars because you just metioned where you where going. Asking constantly "what are you thinking?" That irritates the crap out of me. Stuff like that.

 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 41
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:06:10 PM
Nice Guy = Needy Guy

If you disagree, then you are probably a nice guy.
 BobYakra
Joined: 10/8/2005
Msg: 43
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:11:35 PM
The poster has the formula for what works for guys who look like him.

Ofcourse the women on this site are going to come in here and flame him, but the truth of the matter is that Pof women are not the norm, and thus the minority. Having it put down in words quite like Jay Jay (good god man that name is really too much, can you be more of a cliche posting like that and having that name) will offend most women ofcourse, but that doesn't mean he's not right.

I don't need to reiterate what he's said, but a lot of men on this site could probably benefit from tempering their puppy-dog nice guy attitudes and approaches with some Alpha-male tendencies. Women DO gravitate to a man who is clear on what he wants and doesn't compromise basic needs. Women DO tend to be attracted to a man who isn't afaraid to say things or do things that another guy would think "oh but if I do/say that she won't like me". Not everything you say or do needs to be approved. The mere fact that you seek such complete improval smells of weakness, and women, like dogs, will smell it.

Women can tell you all about how they want "sensitivity" and "nice guys", but if she feels like you will say or do ANYTHING to make her happy then you become the chump. The chump is the guy she'll call and **** about the "jerk" to, because she knows you'll tell her she's right and he'll listen soooo well.

I can vouch for the teasing women thing, it does work. Don't be hatefull, but playfull and throw caution to the wind. If you're always on her case then she'll like the attention she's getting, but the fact that you're teasing her will put her in the mode of trying to get you to see her better qualities. She WANTS a sudden compliment. Starve her for it.
This is a delicate art. You have to have established right off the bat that you're a bit of a mischievious prankster.
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 46
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:17:39 PM
Yes - there are exceptions to every rule. I agree. But stereotypes become stereotypes because they are, more often than not, true.

And, thank you for recognize my whoreness - nice to have my gifts noticed
 viceguy1
Joined: 9/8/2005
Msg: 48
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:19:40 PM


Nice Guy = Needy Guy

If you disagree, then you are probably a nice guy


ridiculous generalization....... respecting the needs of others is humble, and exudes wisdom...that doesnt make them needy
 Lazyboyz
Joined: 8/15/2005
Msg: 49
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:19:58 PM
Remember, offense is just a ploy because the defense is weak


This is coming from a woman with experience - I'm sure she's read the
playbook and knows it by heart.

Don't even try any further because by now you can only crash and burn.
 picker_grinner
Joined: 7/26/2005
Msg: 50
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:30:29 PM
blastkist, you’ll have to offer your workshop/book free to nice guys because they won’t need it. lol
OT
Finishing last can sometimes make you the ultimate winner, when all is said and done.
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 51
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:47:00 PM

Jessika..... I won't ever buy you flowers because I'm too cheap, I don't hold car doors open for women because they have the strength to do that themselves and I won't ever ask you what you are thinking because I just don't care. Date me


LOL you are so funny. That is ok I wouldn't expect you too.
All I have to say is there is a big differance between needy and nice. And all the nice guys on here don't stop being nice. Despite what people say us girls still like the nice guys. It is the NEEDY guys we have a problem with.
 man0man
Joined: 9/2/2005
Msg: 53
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:50:24 PM
Yo, taterboy. If you don't understand big words like 'stereotype', that is okay. You are still a very special boy.
 thawootah
Joined: 10/12/2005
Msg: 55
Stop being a NICE guy
Posted: 10/15/2005 12:55:46 PM
See Women Get All pissed off when you tell everyone the secret to getting to their Vagina.

They really want a guy to show them whos boss i know this. You have to Man handle a women and say woman you better have my laundry done by time i get off work.Otherwise you aint getting no pu tang.

They love it.
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