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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > What are the ingredients to a good relationship?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Tinkle
Joined: 11/2/2005
Msg: 4
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?Page 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
Spend more time thinking about how you are being rather than thinking of how you think the other should be is a good ingredient.

Face it, sometimes it's time to move on. People are unwise if they think they can predict who they will spend the rest of their life with, with absolute certainty. That goes for if you are 99 too, because the other could croak on you and leave you alone.
 sammysalt
Joined: 9/7/2005
Msg: 8
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 11/8/2005 5:17:56 PM
talking, lissioning, never yelling. Give alittle, and get a little. 50/50 Spend some time toghter. Most people that don't last are off doing their own thing more than not.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 9
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 11/8/2005 5:22:38 PM
ms princess Think about what attracted you to him in the first place. What are his good qualities? List them out on paper. Think about what you've appreciated about him and enjoyed in the years you've been together. Try to get back to that. Talk about that with him.
 Tinkle
Joined: 11/2/2005
Msg: 11
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 11/8/2005 5:58:36 PM
A lot are mentioning communication, well, make sure it's mature. I've seen a lot of immature, mean, righteous etc. communicating that doesn't seem to be of benifit. Other than that I thought it was moot. Remember to breathe, eat and sleep...
 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 20
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/5/2005 1:44:54 AM
Agree with Sasquatch...COMMUNICATION....once that is gone the always will be 2nd guessing and suspicion leading to a breakdown in that relationship....
I also read the following at least once a month to remind myself that relationships dont work on autopilot........


1. Be realistic about each other.
Don't try to turn ur partner into something he or she is not. Let's face it, guys-there's only 1 Pamela Anderson in the world, and even she has had her implants removed! Give ur gal a break and understand that her physical appearance is NOT going to change overnite with the help of a few facials ! or treat ments. And ladies, Brad Pitt has already been taken, so u're gonna have to do with what ur guy is like! Chill out, love each other for what u are. There is more to ur partner than what meets the eye.

2. Always talk things out.
Now guys, I know this is not ur fave pastime or mode of resolving issues, but u know what? This works with the gals. Don't make assumptions about each other's feelings. Learn to xpress urself better so that ur partner undrstands what u're angry about, or hurt about, or even happy about! When u stop talking to each other from the heart, it's the beginning of the end.

3. Do stuff together.
Make an effort to do things together. Do some sports or involve urselves in some shared activities; something both of u enjoy or are interested in. It could be as simple as watching movies together, or jus strolling hand-in-hand down Orchard Road. Watch soccor with him once in a while though the green patch on TV puts u to sleep in 3 seconds. And guys, do give in if ur gal asks for another day at window-shopping, rather than suggest that she go out with her girlfriends for "that sort of activities" instead. If u're spending more time with ur friends rather than with ur partner, it's a warning sign that u're drifting apart!!!

4. Meet each other halfway.
If he agrees to throw out that rotten T-shirt with the "The_Rock" print, u shouldn't kick up much of a fuss if he asks u to keep ur room tidy. There's gotta be a little giving and taking in a relationship, so learn to meet each other halfway.

5.Show ur love
Buy her flowers or candy or perfume everynow and then, even if u have been together for 5years. It's wonderful to continue showing someone that u care for him or her. Cook him a special meal, paint him a Valentine's Day card. Knit him mini-socks he can't wear ( like for decoration purposes => ), buy him a packet of milk for breakfast, or pack his wardrobe for him...so he knows u can still be romantic and loving despite having been together for quite a while.

6. Respect each other.
Stop making jokes about her hair or skin, or whatever it is u love to laugh at. Ask urself if she thinks if its funny. And if he has an inferiority complex about his height, stop ogling at tall guys and make him feel worse! Love is about respecting each other's feelings and being sensitive to each other at all times.

7. Bury the past.
Stop bringing up the past. Gals..don't bring up the happy things about u and ur ex to ur guy, it would jus make him jealous or unhappy. And guys, don't talk about the happy times that u had with ur ex or mention about her in ur every other sentence as it would make ur gal feel un-happy and she might think that u saying all this b'cos u are gonna get back with ur ex or not interested in her anymore.

8. Sit on ur jealousy.
All of us go thru' spells of insecurity at the beginning of the relationship, but don't translate that insecurity into jealousy. If u're gonna go through ur partner's mail and cupboard, and eavesdropping on conversations, u know something is wrong - with u!!! Jealousy is like a poison that slowly spreads thru' the relationship before finally killing it. Trust ur partner; love has to have trust in it.

9. Keep ur commitments to each other.
If ur partner is standing u up all the time and cancelling dates and breaking promises, u need to talk! If u're in a relationship, make ur partner ur priority and don't disappoint them if u can help it. It's really terrible when someone promises to take u to dinner, and then calls to cancel it. Don't make promises u can't keep. If ur partner starts to feel that he/she is not important enough to u, u may jus lose him/her.

10. Be honest.
Honesty is not scowling at how awful she looks first thing in the morning, or telling him that he has the biceps of a fly~! When we say "be honest", we mean expressing ur feelings clearly, not being bitingly cruel. When u're hurt, say so, and when u're angry, tell him/her, w/o getting hysterical. If u can't be honest with ur partner, who can u be honest with? æ Love is also about honesty, and a relationship where no honesty exists probabl! y isn't worth it!
 ernstt
Joined: 12/20/2008
Msg: 25
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/26/2008 8:21:01 AM
honesty communication respect chemistry brains
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 33
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History
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/26/2008 6:54:44 PM
Trust, respect, mutual attraction, kindness, friendship
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 38
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History
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/26/2008 10:28:46 PM
Do something nice (or naughty) for him this christmas.
 mitchchan
Joined: 12/4/2008
Msg: 44
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/27/2008 9:27:04 PM
having a strong basics of a real friendship - communication, trust and openness to each other.
 *buzz*
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 49
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History
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2008 4:59:26 AM
T r u s t foremost because it opens door to heart and soul ... and in crisis one knows that they are not left on their own device.
 Redlance71
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 57
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What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 2/11/2009 11:16:27 PM
Tequilla and aspirin. Tequilla to get her in the mood, aspirin in case she says she has a headache. Sorry, flashbacks to my 1st marraige)
 Indiana Rose
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 63
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What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2009 12:11:17 PM
What are the ingredients to a good relationship / Marriage?

1. You must first know yourself.

2. Long term relationships / marriages are well balanced, strong and positive.

3. There is a lack of intimidation, manipulation or abuse. They make a person feel safe.

4. A long term relationship / marriage is a natural fit and feels like it is meant to be.

5. A long term relationship / marriage is not difficult to maintain.

6. A long term relationship / marriage is filled with honesty and support.

7. There is a sense of familiarity and mutuality in a good long term relationship / marriage.

8. Long term relationships / marriages are healthy, passionate and harmonious.

9. Good long term relationships / marriages can easily get a lot done by working together.

10. Couples who are in good long term relationships / marriages take joy in watching the growth of one another.

11. In a good long term relationship / marriage each partner will accept who you are, will bring out the best in you, challenges you, and is your best friend. They will not require you to change.

12. Good long term relationships / marriages relish small moments together and cherish their commitment to their relationship / marriage.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 66
What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:48:58 PM
Not going to repet what is said already. But would like to add, something to what eveyone already said. Do not to take the other person for granted. Dont ever forget to make each other laugh. The little things matter more then we relize. A good evening cuddling on the sofa laughing and having small talk can bring the two of you togher more then anything else out there. As for sex, When sex is good it makes 20% of the relationship but when its bad it makes 80% of the problem. Well thats all i can think of to add right now.. But we all know there is alot more to it or it would have been very easy if we could just follow common sence and a few rules... There is a reason why its called the battle of the sexes... We need to find the right person to have some peace with... Well me still looking but the battles can be hard to take.

Alex
 Lobo_Corazon
Joined: 2/6/2009
Msg: 69
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What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2009 6:12:35 PM

Ingredients for a happy relationship:

2 people who are generally happy in life

2 people who are emotionally healthy and feel loved by those around them

2 people who have a common goal for the relationship (defining what it is)

2 people who agree that a good relationship requires time and effort

2 people who have are capable of demonstrating love and devotion to one another

Mix well...fold in some consistency and some trust...spice with good sex and open communication and cook for the rest of their lives.

Fantastic answer.
 Indiana Rose
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 72
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What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:36:27 PM
^^^^^^^ not2old2fly,

You are correct!!

Our homes are our havens. These places where we come to rest, recharge, and dream in safety and comfort allow us to better face the challenges of the world outside our doors.

When sharing a living space with others, an awareness of the thoughts and feelings of everyone involved is essential in creating the peace we all desire.

Regardless of where we lived before, each time we cohabitate with others it is important that we make the effort to share the space in a way that supports everyone.

We need to remember that in a shared space, everything we sense can also be sensed by another person.

Peace will not likely be the result when the senses are filled with the sight of unwashed plates, intrusive sounds, unpleasant smells, the feel of a foreign substance beneath bare feet, or the taste of food tainted by an uncovered onion in the fridge.

But if we communicate and listen with respect to those with whom we share a space, we may find that one enjoys washing dishes to end the day, while the other can take out the garbage during their evening walk.

Working with another’s schedule, you can still meditate or exercise to your favorite music while the other is out, and save reading for the times when they are trying to sleep.

Being thoughtful of the energy that is required for something to be cleaned up may make everyone aware of being neater, whether that means taking off your shoes at the entrance or wiping up juice spilled on the kitchen floor.

In the same way, pent up resentment toward your living partners is just as easily felt.

Keeping the energy clear requires the effort of communication, the awareness of another’s feelings, and courtesy toward the space you share.

While that sometimes requires changing your schedule or habits, there are many times when having a caring someone nearby is worth all the effort.

Living with others can help us learn to mingle our energies at home as well as at work and in the world at large in a way that benefits us and everyone around us.
 kuddlekitty
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 73
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What are the ingredients to a good relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:55:19 PM
This is timely...
Just came back from a day out by the water with live music. Met this great couple in their 40s, both good-looking, very in shape and completely enamored with each other. They've been married for 17 years.

They were friendly and open, but I noticed they were so secure with each other that they "let each other be." By that I mean she danced one or two dances with some random guy that asked her, he danced with me...but there was nothing meant by it. They weren't "swingers." They weren't playing any games...they were just together, holding each other, mingling...but then gave each other space to flirt maybe??? and then came back together. Don't know if I'd be able to handle that actually, but then again I've never been in a relationship for 17 years! So maybe that's part of the secret...being secure enough and in love enough with each other to not feel jealousy or threatened...just let go a little in order to keep coming back...to each other.
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