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 dragonbabe20
Joined: 11/19/2004
Msg: 5
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Here is one about trust.....and lack there ofPage 1 of 1    
" What sorts of actions could a person take to inspire you not to trust them. Now before you go further, what I am talking about are the more subtle actions"

Subtle things are like inconsistencies in their stories...and past behaviour is the best predictor of future behaviour....not that people can't make mistakes, and be forgiven, mind you....

The big thing is to trust your "gut". If your "little inner voice" is telling you that something isn't right, then find out what is going on. If your partner is more concerned about convincing you that your little voice is wrong than they are about getting all concerns out in the open, addressed and dealt with....there could be underlying reasons why the trust is on shaky grounds.

This is especially true if you are an emotionally healthy person usually, who trusted before, but are sensing subtle changes in behaviour. Take it from me, don't ignore your gut-your little voice-it is your body telling you that you are at risk, even before your logical brain is aware...that you need to take care of yourself...
 dragonbabe20
Joined: 11/19/2004
Msg: 6
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Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/24/2005 11:51:48 PM
" What sorts of actions could a person take to inspire you not to trust them. Now before you go further, what I am talking about are the more subtle actions"

Subtle things are like inconsistencies in their stories...and past behaviour is the best predictor of future behaviour....not that people can't make mistakes, and be forgiven, mind you....

The big thing is to trust your "gut". If your "little inner voice" is telling you that something isn't right, then find out what is going on. If your partner is more concerned about convincing you that your little voice is wrong than they are about getting all concerns out in the open, addressed and dealt with....there could be underlying reasons why the trust is on shaky grounds.

This is especially true if you are an emotionally healthy person usually, who trusted before, but are sensing subtle changes in behaviour. Take it from me, don't ignore your gut-your little voice-it is your body telling you that you are at risk, even before your logical brain is aware...that you need to take care of yourself...
 look in
Joined: 6/24/2005
Msg: 7
Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/25/2005 1:22:41 AM
Trust
I always have said "I believe whatever you tell me until you prove otherwise"

That is why I so openly admit how naive I am.
 look in
Joined: 6/24/2005
Msg: 9
Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/25/2005 3:14:08 AM

what signs cause us not to trust


I agree, which is why I always trust until proven otherwise.

and the no calls and mixed signal, that is what causes a lack of trust. When you are in a relationship you want to accept them with open arms and just enjoy whatever transpires between 2 like people. But some people you have to wonder what they are thinking because one minute it's Hi sweetie, see ya tonight, but tonight never comes and you have to walk backwards to see what you missed because a few hours before everything was just great. I have never understood this one and I have seen it more than once. And not due to physical attraction or lack thereof, but I feel that it is along the same lines as in the differences that men and women view sex. With an emotional attachment involved (example only)women want to know why someone said they would call and did not, if for nothing else so they are not left hanging. I guess some men don't want to give up what they have hanging on a chain so they will go on and do whatever, and instead of giving a response at the appropriate time they may respond later when they are questioned and say something like so, I met someone else, what about it, whoopee for them, if they respond at all. This is something that just goes right through me, in how there is no concious for actions.
cause in the end it usually boils down not to mr/ ms. right but ms. rightnow
 mclendon
Joined: 11/22/2005
Msg: 12
Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/25/2005 5:27:27 PM
I agree, it's a cliche, but all a man has is his word. I think everyone starts at zero, or blank slate, if u will. Then u build credit or debits depending on your actions. Not calling, no shows, rudeness & selfishness are all subtle ways to degrade trust.
For me the problem has always been having the courage of my convictions (if I really dig the guy).
 dceeeee
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 13
Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/25/2005 5:36:24 PM
I start out the relationship with complete trust. This gets broken down with lies, dishonest actions, whatever. I'll let it slide a couple of times, but after that, the trust needs to be earned all over again, as I feel that trust and respect are the 2 most important virtues of a relationship. Without those two things, nothing else matters.
 dceeeee
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 18
Here is one about trust.....and lack there of
Posted: 11/26/2005 6:56:14 PM
I'm so sorry to hear about that, Bugsy bear. I sure hope you two can talk about this and straighten things out.
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