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 Josie555
Joined: 12/2/2004
Msg: 1
Cheating- can you forgive?Page 1 of 59    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
Alright, unfortunately this happens more than we would like to admit. I've just been cheated on for the first time in my life and I hope it never happens again. My question is to people who have been in this situation before; can you really work through something this big? Is it even worth it? Has anyone every had a succesfull relationship with a cheater? And did they really stop after they said they would?
I've always been a firm believer of once a cheater always a cheater and I always vowed that no matter what if anyone ever cheated on me I would kick them to the curb, but it changes once you actually experience it first hand. Your thoughts are much appreciated!
 LoveMeLoveMyInsanity
Joined: 12/9/2005
Msg: 2
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:05:16 PM
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo

AND

No
 UrbanMyth
Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 3
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:06:54 PM

I've always been a firm believer of once a cheater always a cheater


That says it all...my wife cheated on me...we tried, but it never did work out..and we had kids. If you are dealing with someone without empathy, then it will not work..if you are dealing with someone who can't forgive THEMSELF for what they did to you..it won't work. You're not married, you don't have kids...you can almost bet a million bucks he'll do it again.
 dmanross
Joined: 9/3/2005
Msg: 4
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:09:02 PM
Not a chance. If they are cheating, then something is missing. I have never and never will cheat and I've worked in the bar scene where there are temptations and offerings all the time. Id never be able to forget and forgive no matter how long we have been together
 macromorgan
Joined: 11/26/2005
Msg: 5
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:09:24 PM
Forgive? That's a personal issue. I always forgive eventually. But never forget. You said it best, "once a cheater, always a cheater". You're right. When someone demontrates that they are unable to be trusted in a relationship, you should no longer waste your time trying to pursue a relationship with them.
 Sweet Suzie Q
Joined: 9/24/2005
Msg: 6
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:09:25 PM
You can forgive...but you will never forget....and it will play on you mind FOREVER!!!!!
Will you ever FULLY trust the person again...I think not.
And why waste your time on a relationship where you can't trust the person 100%??
Just my opinion ofcourse!!!
Susan
 Thudpucker
Joined: 8/14/2005
Msg: 7
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:09:30 PM
I really tried one time. I found out I couldn't.
 OnTheBus
Joined: 9/12/2004
Msg: 8
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:09:54 PM
ho hum. yes I can forgive.............
 WorkingGirl
Joined: 1/31/2005
Msg: 9
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:11:19 PM
Not ever. I have too much self respect and pride to stick around and be second fiddle to ANYONE. I don't do sloppy seconds well.

Once a dog strays, it doesn't stay home.
 lone56wolf
Joined: 1/31/2005
Msg: 10
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:12:10 PM
I forgave it ... from time and distance ... but I'd never be able to really trust her again. If it happened once ... chances are it will happen again ... and it did. When the trust is gone ... so am I

Steve
 OnTheBus
Joined: 9/12/2004
Msg: 11
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:12:17 PM
once a cheater always a cheater...

once a dog strays blah blah blah



well, good, I guess that means I shouldn't bother dating women who have left their marriages either, because they will probably walk again
 WorkingGirl
Joined: 1/31/2005
Msg: 12
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:14:23 PM
^^^What a ridiculous analogy

I guess it never occurred to you that some women left their marriages because of said cheating spouse, huh?
 ooommaadoll
Joined: 5/17/2005
Msg: 13
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:14:46 PM
well of course...but where the line has to drawn now is to actually learn from my mistakes and to never allow anyone who's done this to get close enough to ever put me through that again...don't call, don't write...just find ya next victim tyvm...
 spacemanspiffter
Joined: 11/20/2005
Msg: 14
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:17:14 PM
All I can offer is..............If you can trust in your heart he will be true and love him.........NOT A CHANCE SISTER :) Kick his cheatin lyin ass to the curb do not pass go do not colllect 200 dollars.

Then get your best friends together and male bash awhile.
 OnTheBus
Joined: 9/12/2004
Msg: 15
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:19:26 PM
it was as ridiculous as yours.

Frankly, I want nothing to do relationship wise with people who carry their anger toward their cheater around with them. I forgave mine, and so should everyone else Because I said so.
 JasmineKai
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:20:07 PM
Can you truly forgive?

I can accept an appology. Accept logical reasons for something occuring. But I can never forget. And by not forgetting I'm really not forgiving. Because there it is, in my mind. I still care that it happened. And that would forever effect a relationship.
 Racer71
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 17
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:20:20 PM
nope, wouldn't forgive
 angel_smile
Joined: 9/18/2005
Msg: 18
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:20:58 PM
I forgave a cheater once.. but i didn't forget and i started to doubt him... I learned my lesson - i totally agree that once a cheater always a cheater.

One way or another, you have to be able to learn to trust again.
 sammysalt
Joined: 9/7/2005
Msg: 19
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:22:45 PM
Many do, but then most of the time it happens again. lets face it. once you let people know you wont leave, then they think its o.k. to do it, because you will stay.
If my man wants to risk getting something, and giving it to me, and not tell me, then I have no reason to stay with someone that didn't care what he might pass on.
 OnTheBus
Joined: 9/12/2004
Msg: 20
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:23:05 PM
I am also not very interested in people that dont know how to forgive things, It shows a lack of willingness to try. Pass, thank you very much
 nomorebeer79
Joined: 11/2/2005
Msg: 21
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:24:32 PM
Yea it is simple it just means you get to try in bang her sister or her mom now! The reality of it if she i a dirty hole and cheating on you someone in her family will too!
 sammysalt
Joined: 9/7/2005
Msg: 22
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:25:50 PM
You could forgive someone that said they loved you and cheated on you with someone with hiv and didn't know it?
Mine has never cheated, but a lot of people get cheated on, and get things. Trust is risky stuff now days.
 Shangrilah
Joined: 12/2/2005
Msg: 23
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:27:16 PM
Don't we all need to be forgiven at one time or another?
 OnTheBus
Joined: 9/12/2004
Msg: 24
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:32:05 PM
yes we do all need to be forgiven for things. with me, it is drying my socks over the rafters.

And I forgive the original poster for starting yet another thread about cheaters
 JasmineKai
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 25
view profile
History
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 12/14/2005 7:33:57 PM
I forgive you OTB for using that hug emoticon.
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