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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Jewelry as proof of ownership      Home login  
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 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 4
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Jewelry as proof of ownershipPage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
It’s a symbol of ownership - plain and simple. What else would drive a man to spend thousands of dollars on a piece of jewlery that she’ll take with her and hock for a 1/4 of the value when she leaves? Women like shiny pretty things, men like to own their women. An engagment ring is the same as putting a sign around her neck that says “I’m taken,” from a man's perspective. And men are no dummies. The nicer the ring, the more likely she is to wear it when he's not around.

It's all about ownership.
 dimestorediva
Joined: 12/30/2005
Msg: 6
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 10:02:26 AM
I agree, a ring is a symbol that says," If you want my undying love, my diamond MUST be at least a carot or my love is dead". Seems like there are many conditions to this sacred ring ritual. This pure token of love must be given to show that you are ready to take your relationship to that next level, the ring must be of adequate size and clarity and also makes you commit to set a wedding date. Seems like alot of bother for jewlery, I'd rather have a new computer.
 Cin4U
Joined: 9/12/2005
Msg: 8
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 10:46:40 AM
Ok I am a traditonalist I suppose, I would want a ring if I were engaged or married only because of the sentiments behind the giver of the ring. My ex hubby and I were together when we were 17 at 19 he proposed, my ring ( we were dead broke) was an 1/8 of a carat basically a chip. I wouldnt have traded it for the Hope Diamond if you asked me. He bought it for me, he picked it out, he got the money together somehow to get me that little chip and it meant the world to me. He always wanted to get a bigger one when we were better off financially later in life but I couldnt part with it. It was a symbol of his love for me and my love for him.
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 9
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 10:55:21 AM
I think what Rake said sort of sums it up.

Wonder how many girls are wearing ugly rings for life that their man picked out. My first engagement ring, was cute but made so thin. It was in a heart shape and everything. I would of never picked it to be a long time ring, because of it being thin. It had eight little dimonds in it. That you had to squint to see. Then you weren't sure they were there. Any way the ring didn't last a year. It got all bent to hell. Yes I wore it, but I did work. One day it got smashed on my finger, and broke it. It couldn't be fixed. I knew that ring wouldn't last.
No it didn't save a finger. It hurt more being pinched from the ring than getting my hand hit. My finger was just scrached from it.

When we got married, my husband picked him a sort of thin ring to, and at work his hand got caught. Messed the ring up. That time he was lucky it didn't take off his finger. When you buy a ring for life, people really need to give it thought.
 andy_subra
Joined: 12/29/2005
Msg: 11
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:01:15 AM
Know somethin.. "GIRLS ARE LIKE ELEPHANTS, WATCH THEM, NEVER OWN ONE"
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 13
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:03:05 AM

*Sigh* YamI, ever the optimist aren't ya?@"when she leaves"

I'm just a barer of reality
 cuter_than_anyone
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 15
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:09:38 AM
i need bling..............
 andy_subra
Joined: 12/29/2005
Msg: 16
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:09:56 AM
For the divorsed, it's OK, but for the single ones out there, virginity is not a dignity, it's just lack of opportunity. ha..ha..ha
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 17
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:15:54 AM

Not every woman leaves YamI, c'mon now... perhaps your reality, that I understand.

True, it's only a little more than half. It would probably make me feel better if they got at least 3/4 of market value
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 18
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:28:20 AM
If you stand by not getting your girl a ring, and she wants one. Then that its self says what she wanted didn't matter to you. You didn't care enough to take her feeling in to light. Just yours. She would be the one wearing it. This might say your ashamed of her, and don't want others to know you are toghter. When freinds find out she has someone, are got married, they say let me see the ring. So she is stuck explaining his side of why she has no ring. The freinds are like oh. I see. And they are thinking, that marrage wont last. He didn't even care to get her a ring.

The reason you give a ring thought. Is because she is going to have that ring for as long as you are going to be toghter, you want her to love wearing it. Yea, at first she loves it because it came from you. But you want her to wear it even on days she is pissed off at you. You don't want her looking at it, and thinking, yea he really cared he got me a ring he knew I didn't like. A girl sometimes just don't understand why guys do this.

Most girls when shopping love to go to the ring area, and look at diffent rings. It don't matter what you went in there for. So a man should have a clue if he really knows her. Then surprise her with one she liked later when she don't see it comming. Thats what a perfect in love man does. Most don't do it. They just pick out one of any size and ask the lady at the counter what one would she like, are think he should get. That is odd, because thats not who he is going to marry, and has to wear it for life.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 19
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:39:13 AM

When freinds find out she has someone, are got married, they say let me see the ring. So she is stuck explaining his side of why she has no ring. The freinds are like oh. I see. And they are thinking, that marrage wont last. He didn't even care to get her a ring.

Very good illustration here. Men buy it connote ownership, women want it to show off to their GFs. It's a ridiculous ritual and a total waste of money. Any man who buys one may as well have set fire to the money used to purchase the ring because it would do just as much good.
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 20
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 11:48:02 AM
Yea, we have the same look on men sports stuff. Are hunting stuff. I hunt but I don't need the best stuff like he does, and he sure shows that stuff off, and its for hunting, are sport. Not something impertant like being married.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 21
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 12:32:56 PM
Whether justified by marriage or not, it's still a blatant display of materialism.

So, ladies, if you really loved a man and he thought an engagement ring was stupid, would you not marry him?
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 27
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 12:54:46 PM
Bugsy,
I’m going to start a new tradition. If I ever ask another woman to marry me, I am going to put a bullet in my brain. If I live, I’ll go through with it.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 28
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 12:57:35 PM
Don't all marriages make you brain dead?
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 29
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 1:00:03 PM
Yeah, AI, I have figured out the only thing that would drive me to marriage again - full frontal lobotomy
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 39
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Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 5:53:45 PM

edit: @Yam...the lobotomy is for you or for her? Both maybe?

Well for me, of course. She can one too, if she'd like. We could probably get some kind of group discount.



I notice not a lot of women have answered my question
 Yobreval
Joined: 7/29/2005
Msg: 41
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 7:19:14 PM
I've never worn jewelry. Can't stand it. I don't even wear a watch.
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 43
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 8:00:10 PM
Your question was would a girl marry a man that wouldn't buy her a ring to show the whole world that he loved her. That would be his reason not to get her one. Turn it around on her, and see if she loved him enough to do it.

I would say, that their would be two people starting off on the wrong foot, they can't even be on the same page. One has to give in to the other, and bow down.
Hell of a way to start your life toghter. No I would not start off on the wrong foot like that.

I don't wear my rings, but I keep them always. If he ever passes on before me. I will still have them always. Even if I remarry. I would keep them, because that is part of our life toghter. Its not about the cost. Its about what went into it, and happened the whole time we were toghter.

Even after a devorice, most keep their rings. It reminds them of a time, good are bad. Something learned in life maybe. They have meaning over all the other rings I own.

I would never marry a man on the wrong page as me, because it wouldn't work out. I don't like to stress over who proves who loves who more. You do are you don't that simple.

Let me ask you one. If she said no. Would you give in, are part ways. I bet you would part ways. Use that as your way out of it. LOL
 Melissanicole
Joined: 5/27/2005
Msg: 44
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/6/2006 8:40:13 PM
people only stay if they choose to do so, if they are happy and loved.


VERY well said.

I dont need a ring, but I would like one. I dont care the size, or price.... heck- get me a CZ and Id be fine. It is a symbol to others that you are happy, committed, and in love. I am not owned because of wearing a ring, I am part of a partnership when I wear a ring.

PS- I HATE jewelry... dont wear any, ever. The only thing I can wear would be rings (I fidget with them, so I usually realize if theyre missing). Id prefer to have that one ring and thats it.
 get_over_it
Joined: 1/7/2006
Msg: 50
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/8/2006 4:14:26 AM
ownership

you mean a ring is like wearing a dog tag? Can I have my ring inscribed in case I get lost? LOL
 Frrosty
Joined: 3/21/2004
Msg: 52
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/9/2006 10:29:42 PM
A ring is a symbol. Symbols are words in language. They express meaning, reminding us of what they stand for. In this way their presence keeps us having certain thoughts, reinforcing some part of our lives. Advertising works the same way. It's not necessary but it does have an effect and lots of people enjoy it. It feels good, evoking love for the person with whom you are united.


Thank you.

I see this as just another way to say "I Love You".




However in case I'm wrong here, I still feel that most people realize that wedding rings are a symbol of two people in agreement of unity and as a sign to the outside world that they have given themselves to someone else and NOT that they OWN someone else


Agreed.

Perspective.......is everything.
 Frrosty
Joined: 3/21/2004
Msg: 53
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/9/2006 11:58:33 PM
I would like to make a very strong point here rom Flapjack Flippers post (who I very much agree with here)

1)
people enjoy it


2)
It feels good


Once these stop happening; maybe it is time for a change in ways to celebrate and show appreciation. Until then; I think this sounds like a good pattern and program.



evoking love for the person


The purpose.

I think this may be called...well..."making love"

um...no?
 Frrosty
Joined: 3/21/2004
Msg: 55
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/11/2006 9:18:17 PM
woul somebody please just give me something honest


wow.

The diamonds I buy will be most honestly purchased and given...

for sure,

 Frrosty
Joined: 3/21/2004
Msg: 57
Jewelry as proof of ownership
Posted: 1/12/2006 8:04:47 PM


You're such a lovely person Ms.


to ward off others


certainly does not hurt though; if it is correct...

I think.
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