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 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 1
u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sexPage 1 of 50    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
I was having a conversation with a guy I know from the US (Carolina) mentioned a friend was coming over he asked the sex and i said it was a guy he said that doesn't happen where he lives. He also told me that plutonic friendship between 2 ppl of opposite sex was a cop out and it meant that one of the 2 was hoping to get lucky. I couldn't believe what I was hearing I have always had friends of the opposite sex and would never dream of having anything apart from friendship with them ok yes sum of my friends have tried it on but that includes the females lol. I said so if i hung out with a guy over there and went for a few drinks n to play pool it couldn't be just for that he said no men have men friends n women women friends. I couldn't get my head round it. He also said that if a local woman said she had a male friend coming over it would be the same as cheating as too is spooning/cuddling a friend. I think some ppl focus too much on sex and not friendship having views like this. I told the guy he was sad that he felt he couldn't have a normal friend in a woman.

So what do u think can we have plutonic friendships with ppl of the opposite sex?

xjx
 shore66
Joined: 5/23/2004
Msg: 2
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:23:53 AM
If men are from Mars, and women from Venus, and we live on Earth - how does Pluto enter into a friendship? That's pretty far out!
 bigleafsfan
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 3
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:31:28 AM
i think it depends on the guy and girl, is it possible I say yes, i have a couple of female friends ive known for years and we were never involved in any way so its possible, but on the other hand ive had female friends that yes we did get involved , so six of one half dozen of another.
 Ainsel
Joined: 2/20/2005
Msg: 4
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:32:04 AM
^^^^Good one Shore

Yes, men and woman can have a plAtonic relationship with each other but it does not usually mean hanging out for hours in a twosome and doing things like spooning and cuddling. Twosome's and physical affection are a sign of more than a platonic relationship IMO.

Hanging out with a bunch of people of both sexes who are not paired off and with whom there are mutual interests counts as platonic relationships. One can be friends with people of both sexes but there are lines that don't get crossed.
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 5
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:38:02 AM
well my best friend at college was a guy and he would never dream of over stepping the mark. We spent most of our time together when single I think it was about enjoying each others company and being able to trust each other and talk about anything and feel that we weren't gna get judged. I have been out clubbing and had my female mates cuddle up to me and go to sleep why does spooning or cuddling have to be sexual.
 SunChyne
Joined: 9/14/2005
Msg: 6
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:44:25 AM
wow...interesting I have never thought about this...honestly I believe its possible but I have never had "just" a guy friend....(xcept online) weird
 zentral
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 7
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 9:55:01 AM
You mean with someone from the underworld?

plutonic: igneous rock that has solidified beneath the earth's surface; granite or diorite or gabbro

If you mean platonic, then yes, I have, and no, it isn't difficult to do even if they are attractive, if they are not the right match for you.
 Thorb
Joined: 7/15/2005
Msg: 8
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:07:23 AM
Isn't that what you are supposed to have with your brothers and sisters and co workers?
If you can't mannage that... then socially you are in big trouble.
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 9
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:12:47 AM
Sure, you can have a Plutonic relationship with the opposite sex. I've done it. It's not as much fun, but I've done it.
 TallNdarkone4u
Joined: 6/2/2005
Msg: 10
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:14:32 AM
I dont see how you can label any relationship like this. by the way its platonic!

You and the person in a relationship determines what type of relationship your going to have.

Some people send out the signals that they need to be needed....and your friends could be taking that as ..want sex!!

Intimacy has many levels..sex not always being the additive to that feeling. You need to define that with your friends... and if they cant handle it...there are plenty of friends on pluto to be had!
 The Navigator
Joined: 12/15/2005
Msg: 11
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:14:53 AM
Ha ha..."plutonic"...

Anyways, I KNOW it's possible to have a PLATONIC relationship with the opposite sex...
 mystriousnetrix
Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 12
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:16:14 AM
Yes. I have two females friends (twins), and they are my best friends ever. I went out with one of them for a brief time, but I was stupid and ruined it. They think that I am the best, nicest guy in the whole world (beats me). It is possible. If ANY person wants to have sex with you and hasn't been going out with you for a decent amount of time (as bf/gf), DITCH them. Relationships are NOT about sex.
 vanitygirls
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 13
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:17:14 AM
i was just going to say that
isnt it platonic?
 DnickieD
Joined: 5/30/2005
Msg: 14
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:17:51 AM
Absolutely yes you can have a friend/s of the opposite sex. I have male friends that have never crossed that line for many years. They are happily married and some not, and wouldn't dream of it, nor would I. They drop in from time to time for a coffee and we gab our heads off. I think the world of them, and have had many people sugest that they were looking to get lucky, which just isn't true. We trust each other and can confide in the other, knowing that it won't go any farther. We've helped each other through the crises de jour, and had alot of laughs over some silly things many many times. We've hugged and kissed each other's cheeks, but in no way does that send the message that we want to get it on! I think that if someone thinks that it's just tempting to try it, has some issues he's/she's not showing up in convos, which could be jealousy/control/ or just self confidence/esteem issues. Just my 2 cents worth.
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 15
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 10:21:35 AM
OK,OK! PLATONIC, you know what I mean !
 CinnamonCat
Joined: 7/21/2005
Msg: 16
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:27:35 AM
@shore66 --
: If men are from Mars, and women from Venus, and we live on Earth - how does Pluto enter into a friendship? That's pretty far out!


Maybe she treats you like a dog?
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 17
u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:37:07 AM
Thanks for the type o lol I knew there was a reason I only got a 'C' in English
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 18
u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:38:11 AM
hahaha well thanks for your input
 rezaliciouscute
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 19
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:43:35 AM
yes, you can have awesome friendships only with the opposite sex. I have gr8 guy friends that are really like my brothers n they treat me with awesome respect n vise versa. Personally I just have personal boundaries where I draw the line where friendship with guyz and I rely on my principles that what I feel is wrong n right~keep it simple.
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 20
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:43:41 AM
exactly relationships are not about sex :)
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 21
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:45:09 AM
this is how I feel
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 22
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 11:47:01 AM
I can't understand how u think that just by being close to sum1 of the opposite sex and sleeping next to them means sex is on the cards
 mystriousnetrix
Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 23
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 12:01:20 PM

When it rises....generally "sex" is on the cards.

No, not really. "Sex" is only on the cards if the woman wants it and welcomes it, and she should not do that unless she is going out steady with the man.
 johnglc
Joined: 1/7/2006
Msg: 24
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 12:12:56 PM
Of course it's possible....
 mightydog
Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 25
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/21/2006 12:14:30 PM
Most women refuse to accept it (or admit it).

Women like keeping guys on strings for later use.
She dates, decides to be friends. He hopes for more. He is so desperate (or hopeful for nooky) that he agrees to be buddies.

Repeat.

Now the woman knows that she always has someone to call to get her out of trouble, to pick her up when she is drunk or has a fight, or maybe protect her if she gets stalked or something.

She also gets to hang out and drink someone elses beer.

She gets to hang out and bask in her own glory with these "platonic" guys trying to show how cool, nice and accepting they are. And if she has a break up, she can immediately find a guy to tell her it isn't her fault, how sweet and beautiful she is, etc etc etc.

Women who hang out with men instead of women ususally are attention junkies. Also, I have noticed, they prefer men because they can manipulate them. They don't like women friends because the women see right through them.

This is my $.10. Obviously the women who fit this bill will deny it, but some of you younger guys need to learn this lesson fast.
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