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 A_hearts_song
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 1
Who writes first?Page 1 of 1    
I am curious as to who writes first to the ads..women or men? Is it a draw?
 Garf
Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 2
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 10:24:59 PM
We stand back to back, take ten paces, and type. Men usually win, because our emails are shorter....you don't need much time to write, "nice titties, wanna chat?"


Why is this in Broken Hearts?
 A_hearts_song
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 3
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 10:26:35 PM
Most emails end up as broken heart messages.Still think women write first.
 Garf
Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 4
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 10:31:46 PM
Men here would like to think women write first.
It would boost some egos.

Men look at the pictures, and email the women with the least amount of clothing, the biggest boobs, the fewest men in their pics, and the easy-to-read profiles.
Women look for guys who actually wrote a profile that doesn't contain spelling errors, grammar explosions, references to their manhoods, or a documentary about their car.

What do you think is easier to find? lol...
 looking6500
Joined: 4/7/2005
Msg: 5
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:04:01 PM
Don’t listen to garf he is an idiot!!!! Most guy are truly looking for that someone to make them happy for their rest of there lives but there are guys on every dating site just looking for an easy lay and that’s ok for the many women looking for the same. Girls do not get discouraged there are good men out there and trust me we read what you write in your profile. So if you do not write anything you get what you ask for, so be careful what write/ask for.
 kindirishman
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 6
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Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:06:14 PM
Been my experience that men write first. Why do I say that? It's because any and all contact that I've had with women on this site has been from my initial contact. I think women still like to be chased, and most guys don't mind chasing, but for once I'd like to be the one with a surprise email in his inbox.
 Garf
Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 7
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:11:43 PM
Don’t listen to garf he is an idiot!!!! I've been posting here a year, and that's the first time anyone has ever said that!

Obviously...I was being sarcastic, with a point attached. Women here get swamped with emails every day. This is why there are countless threads asking why so many women just "unread/delete"...because so many boneheads have ruined it for those of us who actually take the time to write something decent, by writing things like. "Hey what's up? Are those boobs real?"
Men do not get swamped with that many emails.
And women, for the most part...write more than, "nice pecs, can I sit in your car?" (although this is many men's fantasy email.)

Women write more substance. How about that?
 A_hearts_song
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 8
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:12:58 PM
True enough. Guys are just writing to the ones that trigger their hormones. In reality, who writes first to find someone special to enrich their lives? Guys writing to get lucky only cause heartaches. So the women seeking romance are they the first to write to the guys saying the same thing. Some ladies are more apt to write first and pour out their emotions. Guys just write to the scantly clad women in hope of getting what? One can see the guys point of view but they are not writing to actually begin a relationship with these women. Are they? They seem to be collecting trophies.The women are looking for romance so they read the profiles carefully as mentioned. So women are ahead here in the writing game.
 couldusecompany
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 9
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:13:52 PM
I think it comes down to the age-old routine of men trying to "woo" the woman. As a result, I think more men contact women first than the other way around. To be honest, in my experiences I have found I am by far contacted more than I've emailed on this site.

However, on another *pay* dating site, I found that I was almost never emailed first. So as soon as money is involved, it appears to me anyway that women are reluctant to make the move.

Hey - don't get at me girls. That's just what I've found.....
 kindirishman
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 10
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Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:29:46 PM
Hearts, you shouldn't put all of us men in the same pile. I for one am not hormone driven. I'm far too intellectual for that sort of thing, I take a look at the entire profile before sending messages to anyone. If they haven't got a brain their head, and their profile is like soooo many of the generic ones on here I don't go near 'em. I'd much rather be able to have an intelligent conversation over staring at ta ta's all night or oogling over how hot my date is. I do admit that physical attraction has to be there, but my definition of attractive may not suit another's. That being said, I prefer someone who is pretty, yes, beautiful, yes, average, yes. Most of the ones that are considered "hot" on this site look like they just stepped off the bus from skank camp. Conservative, natural beauty is my bag. Anyway sorry for the rant. Just have to let it be know that generalisation of on sex or another is uncouth for anyone to do.
 looking6500
Joined: 4/7/2005
Msg: 11
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/13/2006 11:42:22 PM
Sorry garf I did not mean to attack you personally. You are correct in some of the things you say. I guess should explain more on if guys should respond /reply first to a women’s profile. First let met me tell you that most real men are wimps. Not that we are afraid of things per say. Personally I have faced bears; I have been shot at close range (P.S. I was a police officer). But a real man still fears his mother (her wrath) and that is why most men do not respond first.
 A_hearts_song
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 12
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/14/2006 8:14:19 AM
Gentlemen I apologize for any unnecessary remarks. I was just commenting on things said.
 UCBrotha
Joined: 1/31/2006
Msg: 13
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/14/2006 8:18:42 AM
Like in RL women wait for men to make the first move.
 wespauley
Joined: 12/18/2005
Msg: 14
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/14/2006 8:26:53 AM
I have contacted 8 women first on POF, usually to tell them I thought something they wrote in a post was funny, which led me to look at their profile, which I also found amusing or at least interesting. Each one wrote a message back. I have had 57 women contact me first, usually for the same reason. The long distance thing is killing me here. The closest one only lived about 20 miles away, the farthest was from Thailand.
 Poet102781
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 15
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/14/2006 3:04:59 PM
I actually write to the women I think I can set free from the Matrix
 Garf
Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 16
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/14/2006 3:15:27 PM
I think I've made first contact about six times in the past year.

No worries, officer! I do come across a little strong sometimes to people who are new to the forums. You'll learn when to ignore my rants, lol.
 NinthDoctor
Joined: 1/14/2006
Msg: 17
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/20/2006 8:48:02 AM
Actually I don't think it really makes a difference. If a woman is intrested in me and I email her she will reply. If she is intrested in me and I havent emailed her yet I would hope that she is not so shy as to just sit there. At the end of the day this is just an introduction service, if you dont email anyone whos is to blame if you dont meet anyone?
 NinthDoctor
Joined: 1/14/2006
Msg: 18
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/20/2006 8:49:04 AM
Actually I don't think it really makes a difference. If a woman is intrested in me and I email her she will reply. If she is intrested in me and I havent emailed her yet I would hope that she is not so shy as to just sit there. At the end of the day this is just an introduction service, if you dont email anyone whos is to blame if you dont meet anyone?
 cuteandreal
Joined: 3/10/2006
Msg: 19
Who writes first?
Posted: 3/20/2006 9:09:34 AM
It does seem that (some...most...) men will respond to pretty much anything...

I have received FAR more initiations from men than I have initiated. However, I will probably only want to meet the ones where I have initiated contact.

I tend to know better what I am looking for.
 motolou
Joined: 8/9/2007
Msg: 20
Who writes first?
Posted: 7/27/2009 7:30:55 PM
I know the most of the time I write to the ladies first.Every great once in awhile I'll get a kind greeting form someone.Just not very often.
 Jadd2767
Joined: 7/5/2009
Msg: 21
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Who writes first?
Posted: 8/1/2009 1:49:46 PM
First off Garf is an idiot, I sure hope your blow up doll doesn't know your on a dating website, that could get ugly......
This is just my opinion which in turn is worth about as much as Garfs blow up doll, but if you like what someone wrote or have a good feeling about them then write, be honest and be real...I know 2 no-nos in dating...kidding......you start making all these rules or guidelines about when to write etc...it almost starts turning into a game and I have to believe nobody is down with games...your trying to get to know someone...just be yourself!
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