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 TombstoneTom
Joined: 2/20/2006
Msg: 1
Top 10 danger signsPage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I we sitting here today pondering about my experiences in dealing with insincere potential dates, and realized that it would make a good discussion.

These are my experiences, and not written in stone, and only from my perspective. I'd be interested to know /discuss the subject from others.

No, This is NOT DR. Phill !!! ((I'm actually closer to Jerry Springer)

Top 10 Indications of Games, according to me:

1Your Potential date suddenly always has an excuse to cancel, (Three strikes you're out is how I handle it)

2 IF you are talking to a potential date on the phone, and you hear the computer keyboard constantly clicking, or far to slow on the I'm,(other than server trouble) Chances are you arent the only one being played. To me it's also rude. I deal with one on one, after all, if I can't give her my undivided attention, I'm not showing her any respect

3 constantly answering/yacking on the cell phone on a date(I turn mine off)

4 Some disaster/drama always seems to come up everytime you are together (things do happen, but not every time)

5 constantly wanting to borrow money

6 Constantly deriding and talking about an ex.

7 you get the "just friends" label. (in short, you are free to take her /him out, but you wont get any benefit(Im NOT talking about sex) out of it.

8 The first question is "what do you do for a living"???(or always tring to shift the conversation toward it)

9 Your date is unconfortable with eye contact(shifting, looking at the floor ECT.

10 Your date is far too busy to talk, e-mail. If you dont have the time, why try? relationships take time and hard work.

Top 10 Indications of a date/mate who is going to dump you.

1 They always walk ahead of you(sounds stupid, but true)

2 New, sudden and mysterious "friends"

3 A new job that just happens to be on a graveyard shift or during quality time(not always, but worth pondering) a unwillingness to compromise.

4 Suddenly accusing you of infidelity

5 Demanding that you change or else

6 Unexplained jump in cell phone bills

7 Unexplained problems with checking account/credit card

8 Gets angry at you for showing any affection in public

9 finding yourself alone more & more

10 You have a feeling of loneliness and you hurt worse with them than alone.

Thoughts/ comments??
Tom
 danniegirl86
Joined: 9/23/2005
Msg: 2
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 9:50:25 AM
ha ha...lol...all of those are sooooo true!

How about this:

*Not ever wanting to go out, just wanting to stay in all the time (they are ashamed of you, but want the sex)
 TombstoneTom
Joined: 2/20/2006
Msg: 3
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 10:10:11 AM
Hey DannyGirl86

Exellent point! Maybe this is a start of a good book!


TOM
 PepperStar
Joined: 6/21/2005
Msg: 4
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 2:37:23 PM
When you are with them they are very romantic and want to have sex with you, but they keep checking in to POF?
 AREALANGEL
Joined: 2/5/2006
Msg: 5
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 2:54:01 PM
Those are good ones..

also

1) The hedging of weekend plans when asking what they are doing this weekend?

2) The old restaurant bathroom technique..staying in there longer than they should and coming out with a red face..from a cell phone conversation.

3) also at the same time...they left their wallet sitting on his drawer making you pay.

4) Telling you they have the weekend off but have a lot of things they need to do like paint the house, needs to visit a sick friend who lives out of town, or just I don't know but I may have to work this weekend..I will not know until Saturday morning if I have to..

5)They call you by another name and ask how your son Derrick is? When you don't have kids!!

6)His tattoo reads Jail Slut

7)He calls his mom and arranges for her to meet you during the first date.

9)He brings his son to the first date and asks his son if you look like his mom? and they both have a conversation about the differences...(TRUE STORY)

10.He asks what your daughter is doing this weekend?
 justskippingstones
Joined: 10/26/2004
Msg: 6
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 5:51:20 PM
I will agree with your 10 warning signs they are accurate and honest.

My experience from single men on date sites:

I had one man Instant Message me and we were not more than two minutes into the chat and he started with the "bar room trash talk". I was not real happy about that and ended the conversation. He then e-mails me and tells me that it was a good thing that I ended the conversation the way I did, that way he did not have to bother with me any farther. At first I was rather insulted, then I thought...NO...this man is a loser, why on earth would I feel hurt by a man that I really didnt want know by the way he was talking to me. I should be thanking him for showing me who he really was up front. That way, I know not to wasted my time finding out he was a jerk.

I have met some really nice men on single sites. No second dates though...makes me kinda sad. But oh well. Ladies and Gentlemen...when they say they are just too busy or have too many irons in the fire....thats the polite way of telling someone you really arent interested and move on.

I feel I am date worthy. I listen to what he has to say, I have eye contact with him. Im not looking around the room at other people or other men. I listen to them go on about their ex-wifes...(to a point). I smile, offer to assist with the tab. I dont know....single at 46 is just nuts. Sometimes, I think to myself...why even bother. But, life goes on...and on...and on.
 barb550
Joined: 2/12/2006
Msg: 7
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 6:57:23 PM
I agree especially about hearing the keyboard during a telephone conversation and not contacting you for days and you can see that the person has been online. Hum...
 sweetsmile3
Joined: 2/27/2006
Msg: 8
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 7:12:44 PM
Hmmm... good ones... how about these:

1) Sends you flowers on Valentines
2) Tells you he thinks you are the most wonderful person he's ever met
3) Says he feels like the luckiest man in the world to have you in his life
4) Talks about all the great things you are going to do together

Apparently those were red flags that I was about to get dumped 4 days later.... so I would include those on the list of "danger signs" for sure!!
 JJBrooks
Joined: 3/6/2006
Msg: 9
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 8:12:26 PM
VERY insightful! I was heartbroken to find that once my work scheduale changed (no more weekends and holidays) that my "soulmate" was not available, I guess I wasn't important enough for "prime-time". But then again, it may be because HE WAS MARRIED!!! There goes honesty, I am just glad I found out when I did and that I didn't continue to invest my heart & soul in a coward who couldn't be honest!
 JJBrooks
Joined: 3/6/2006
Msg: 10
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 8:17:59 PM
yep! That's what I'm talkin 'bout
 virgogidget
Joined: 11/10/2005
Msg: 11
view profile
History
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 9:07:05 PM
yes i know most of these. and agree with the posts, i bet theres dozens more as well
 minibikegi
Joined: 10/5/2004
Msg: 12
view profile
History
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 9:48:23 PM
Youre 30 yr old g/f tells you her mother doesnt want her to date you anymore? lol so very true! grrrrrrrrrr
 carrie bradshaw
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 13
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/14/2006 10:56:21 PM
Dear OP;
All I want to add is that I agree and thank you for the posting of that information. I can just imagine how many women were checking off all that apply.
 Mojo_LA
Joined: 12/15/2004
Msg: 14
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 1:58:17 AM
TOP TEN SIGNS THAT SOMEONE IS NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP

10. Always talking about how they don't need a relationship
9. Was first in line for half price chocolate the day after Valentine's day
8. Laughs at anything
7. Goes through a surprising number of "D" cell batteries
6. Actually gets work done at work
5. Can suddenly keep up with discussion of last night's show
4. No longer avoids dessert
3. Is on time Monday morning
2. Sticks finger down throat and makes gaging noise at the sight of couples

And the #1 way you can tell someone is not in a relationship

50+ FORUM POSTS A DAY!
 maree12
Joined: 3/7/2006
Msg: 15
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 2:04:26 AM
Frightening Tom. You need to add that they don't want to introduce you to their friends anymore. We are in the 8, 9 and 10 stage at the moment, but I have nowhere to go.
 newchick111
Joined: 12/28/2005
Msg: 16
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 3:25:23 AM
Here is a good one.. when your hubby is gone for 2 or 3 days at time and is miffed at the fact that you dare to ask him... "where have you been".......was told it was "none of my business" by his mom!!....

It happens..or course I am divorced....
 destiny0464470
Joined: 7/11/2005
Msg: 17
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 4:04:52 AM
How is this for a danger sign. They make plans for you to come over for supper the following day. You call them that mid-morning and ask if you are still on for supper. They tell you "I don't know. I might have to go and help my brother. Let me call you back in 30 min." You wait and you wait and you call them back after 2-3 hours and get no answer. Finally they call you 1 hour before you are to leave and tell you no.
 ganailtech
Joined: 2/19/2006
Msg: 18
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 4:32:11 AM

9 Your date is unconfortable with eye contact(shifting, looking at the floor ECT.



Disagree, only because I'm a submissive personality and I don't keep eye contact with anyone, not even my clients. The only 2 exceptions are my mom and best friend.
 gorgeous_gal
Joined: 3/8/2006
Msg: 19
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 6:41:52 AM
-how about they keep reminding you of their "fear of committment".
-they seem to be always busy on weekends and will only see you during the week
-they are very romantic and loving when they are with you but when they are not around, you feel like he doesn't exist, because he doesn't call to say hi.
-it seems that they can always call and contact you but you can never contact them..phone is either turned off or they don't answer and when you asked if they got your message, acts innocent..

they declare that you are their soulmate and fate has brought you together even though you haven't even met yet!
 Montreal_Guy
Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 6:43:33 AM
Tom,

Some great wisdom there.

A partial addition re cell phones. If the cell phone bills ( including logs of all call made) suddenly start to vanish from the pile of bills to be paid - start packing.

That was the first concrete tip off for me.
 Jarbarian
Joined: 2/9/2006
Msg: 21
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 1:53:48 PM
Add to just about to dump you....

1. Stops calling/emailing as often as they used to.
2. Emails are short and direct and less "chatty".

These are just two that I can think of off my head that my ex started doing when she was getting ready to dump me.

And definitely, if you see some new friends, look out...
 coca2
Joined: 2/17/2006
Msg: 22
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 5:50:16 PM
Re: Tom.....u nailed alot on the head...1 thing though.....I ask what a guy does for a living....I am not going to date a loser..or moocher.....he needs to be financially secure.. i am....p.s.....there r guys out there who r gold diggers
 Kiss_My_Karma~
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 23
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 6:11:50 PM

7. Goes through a surprising number of "D" cell batteries


I see nothing wrong with that one.....don't hate.


 SimplyPeachy
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 24
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 7:08:02 PM
Danger!? Let's see:

1. Alone dates no longer seem to be possible, just meet ups with friends as a group.
2. Primary form of communicating becomes electronic.
3. They seem to be overly interested or quick to mention your female friend or friends.
4. Longer dates gone by seem to become shorter and shorter in length.
5. They are talking to mutual friends more than they talk to you.
6. They make little your terms of endearment by brushing them off.
7. Their conversation seems strained or distant.
8. Your ideas for dates don't fit their desires.
9. Them finding differences in opinions with passion seeming to want to cause conflict.
10. They begin insulting you and your likes.

10 Good Sings!!

1. They seem to want more time with you.
2. They remember small things you share and make certain to mention them to let you know they are listening.
3. They are considerate and thoughtful to make sure you are onboard with dates and adventures.
4. They like to be close to you and somewhat affectionate (sometimes difficult for men, but when they do it, you know).
5. They are giggley around you.
6. If you are walking down the street, they want you to be near to them (not in front, back or a person away (the block).
7. They share with you about their friends.
8. They want to know more about you and your life.
9. Although it doesn't have to be a year into the future, but they seem to want to plan something with you a month or so in advance.
10. They really want to introduce you to their guy friends and family.

I think we need a 10 Good Signs post! I will post on a different forum.
 smile with your eyes
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 25
Top 10 danger signs
Posted: 3/15/2006 7:22:23 PM

TOP TEN SIGNS THAT SOMEONE IS NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP

10. Always talking about how they don't need a relationship
9. Was first in line for half price chocolate the day after Valentine's day
8. Laughs at anything
7. Goes through a surprising number of "D" cell batteries
6. Actually gets work done at work
5. Can suddenly keep up with discussion of last night's show
4. No longer avoids dessert
3. Is on time Monday morning
2. Sticks finger down throat and makes gaging noise at the sight of couples

And the #1 way you can tell someone is not in a relationship

50+ FORUM POSTS A DAY!


Please change number 7 to "AA" batteries...and you are bang on! :)
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