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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 jeweelee
Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 1
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention? Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Look, I know I am a bigger woman then most men (nearly all) men like to date, does not mean I am not worth a second look.
I am told by alot of people that I have the best sense of humor and the best personality, I have pretty eyes.. I am friendly and confident. However when it comes to dating...seems like all the guys run...I have not had any "guys" tell me why they wouldn't even hang out with me. (and yes I do understand the term "not my type")
I know several women larger then me and they always have a guy. The difference...They put out. I have standards, and maybe they do too, but I just don't seem to understand.
I've been reading the forums in here, quite funny some of them, but hey, they one about do the pictures matter, apparently they do cause even if you are honestly telling someone something, they will not give you the time of day....so my opinion, yeah looks are the most important with guys, but surely there are a few out there that are interested in conversations and intelligence and a pretty smile.
Can some one tell me what's up?
 Sassy911
Joined: 3/26/2006
Msg: 2
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 3/30/2006 6:24:29 PM
Well darlin I'm not a big woman but I still don't put out...I have my standards and either they like it or they can leave it......so never lower your standards...just hang in there and some day your prince will come.
 Angel_in_jeans
Joined: 8/24/2005
Msg: 3
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 3/30/2006 6:30:22 PM
I think it depends on what kind of attention you are looking for and what kind of man you want it from. I know women that always seem to be able to find a male companion in nothing flat. But when I look at the quality of the people they find-I'd rather be alone. Hang in there! Relationships take time and they are hard to find in this world where so many people treat others like they're as disposable as used diapers. But everyone once in awhile someone comes along that makes you realize-it's worth the wait.
 ksue44
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 4
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 3/30/2006 8:25:53 PM
Well, I'm "fluffy" as they say, so I'm no slim Jane here... I'd rather get respected than put out just to get noticed.. Now, respected means I won't put out unless I'm in an exclusive dating relationship. Hence, if I get noticed a whole lot less than those that do put out, I know in my heart that I come out the winner!

No, you don't have to put out to get attention... Focus on your positive attributes; be the best person you can be; love yourself; believe in yourself; and hold your head up with great pride and dignity... Believe me, that will get you noticed by good men than spreading your legs apart.
 hamango
Joined: 3/8/2009
Msg: 5
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 10:27:45 AM
You can get attention by standing on the corner and yelling. Men will look, pay attention, and there you go. I suspect your motive. What kind of attention do you want from men?

If your motivation is anything other than sex, why would your desire for attention be limited to male attention?
 Gladys Friday
Joined: 3/14/2009
Msg: 6
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 1:03:43 PM
I'm not a big woman, I don't put out & I don't have a pic on my profile, but I get lots & lots of messages from men. Nice, intelligent, gentlemen! The good men will find you too, but you have got to be patient. And while you are being patient do some searching & send some messages to the guys you are interested in.
 The Ringleader
Joined: 10/25/2008
Msg: 7
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 2:12:05 PM
I can assure you that you don't need to "put out" as you say, to get male attention. I'm sure there are several other things you can come up with!

You have to realize that not every man you might be interested in is going to feel the same way about you. In addition to that, possibly there is someone interested in you that you would not consider.

My suggestion is to live your life and start enjoying it.....he will come around in time.
 bklynrebel
Joined: 11/30/2008
Msg: 8
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 5:14:22 PM
You need to live by your standards, not other people's. Your self respect comes from within.
 Landra
Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 9
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 5:49:38 PM
It's attitude.
I know a big woman. She's older (over 60) not attractive by "classic" standards-- she wears her graying hair in a sloppy beehive. She paints on old-fashioned blue eyeshadow and shocking red lipstick. Her wardrobe consists mainly of leggings and giant animal print "mumu" things.

Men ADORE her. It's incredible. Men of all ages- young, old, handsome, average- flock to her. They flirt with her. They blush and stammer when she flirts back. I've seen it happen and it's mind-boggling. When she's around, I'm invisible.

Back in her hey-day, she was a beauty pageant queen. She still believes she's a beauty queen and that confidence and attitude is obvious. She thinks, without a doubt, that she is a hot ticket and conducts herself accordingly. And men respond to that.
 etranger
Joined: 12/8/2008
Msg: 10
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/4/2009 6:01:17 PM

I know several women larger then me and they always have a guy. The difference...They put out. I have standards, and maybe they do too, but I just don't seem to understand.


Here's what's up: I have never been interested in a woman who refers to sex as "putting out" and seems to wield it as a weapon against men. Believe me, that kind of attitude comes shining through in a woman's personality. All of the women I've been interested in have in common that they will have sex with a guy, or not, as it suits them because they see it as a mutually-enjoyable activity between partners. No, none of them are/were sluts, but neither did they refrain when they wanted to have sex because of "standards." Every guy friend that I've discussed this with feels the same.

I don't know the other, larger women that you see with guys all the time. You think that they have guys because they give the guys sex? You know what they say about statistics all the time: "Correlation does not imply causality." It's like that graph that shows global average temperatures going up over time, as the number of pirates decreased; lack of pirates causes global warming! I don't know those women, but I bet that there's a third factor, and those women you see have guys, and have sex with guys, both because they LIKE GUYS. They like guys for who they are, and enjoy their company for what it is, without hidden anger or ulterior motives. That attitude feels like a cool breeze from the window on a muggy summer night, and it's always a treasure when I find it.
 spring snorkeler
Joined: 7/5/2008
Msg: 11
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 4/5/2009 9:07:23 AM
in fact if a woman 'puts out' too soon that is a turn off at least for me
the right guy will appreciate when a woman waits
 lostintheshuffle
Joined: 5/8/2008
Msg: 12
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 5/3/2009 9:14:33 AM
Maybe to keep a male's attention they have to. But really, sometimes its the challenge of getting there that holds the man's attention.

Its different with every person.
 NESunshine
Joined: 7/11/2008
Msg: 13
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 5/3/2009 9:25:41 AM
It's all confidence and attitude. If you think you are amazingly awesome and act like it, you will succeed. It has nothing to do with having sex just to get or keep someone's attention. People have sex because they want to. It's not a gift that either sex gives away. Some people prefer to be exclusive first and others don't. If you value yourself, the way you say you do, then you won't put out because you know you don't want to.

edited: This thread is 3 years old, so honey, I hope you did it!
 mycroft1974
Joined: 3/4/2009
Msg: 14
Do women really have to put out just to get male attention?
Posted: 5/3/2009 12:17:25 PM
do women have to put out to get male attention. that would be a no. however, to get the loser no good for nothing worthless piece of scumbucket trash that appeals to you.....yea you might have to put out. happy fishin'
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