Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 RAFlady
Joined: 4/18/2006
Msg: 1
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!Page 1 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
Hi, I have used internet dating on and off for about 2 years. Sometimes it is okay, other times I think the whole concept is back to front ie. two people thrown together yet really know nothing about it each other. The first date could be bad, but do you give each other the benefit of the doubt????
Everyone must admit that the first thing they look at is the photograph - again is this really right??
Oh bum, I've just given up on dating!!
 carrie bradshaw
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 2
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 1:31:19 AM
Carrie is here for the forums.
 carrie bradshaw
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 3
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 1:35:18 AM
Internet relationships are not always hard. Kaos and I talk on the telephone and drink Vodka together.....
Do not email me, we are not lesbians.
Carrie
 RAFlady
Joined: 4/18/2006
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 1:43:13 AM
I like the 'have to kiss lots of toad's!! I think I can relate to that one!
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 4:13:13 AM
The biggest problem with this is that everyone is so far away.
This would be great if you worked for an airline.
 terry44030
Joined: 12/4/2005
Msg: 7
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 4:39:23 AM
It's only as hard as you make it. If you have the attitude that everyone you talk to just wants to get laid, it's gonna be difficult to meet anyone worthwhile. Same goes for if you think everyone is a mass murderer/rapist/sexual deviant. I have a couple of female sexual deviant stories......but, that'll be for some other post some time, LOL. Most of what I've seen is that women email a few times, then (if you're lucky) they'll talk on the phone a few times, and after 2 or 3 weeks, they disappear into thin air. And, heaven forbid that a guy suggest meeting within 3 months of the first email, that seems to make women run and hide immediately. I'm beginning to think that all the woman POF'ers are just here to boost their egos by the male atention they receive. 'nuff said'
 knight rider
Joined: 4/16/2006
Msg: 8
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 5:25:48 AM
Terry,no catagorising women with quote " I'm beginning to think that all the woman POF'ers are just here to boost their egos by the male atention they receive.
'nuff said'" Unquote.

Putting all women or men in the same basket is taboo. I don't believe in that,good and bad existe as much in women as in men,so why judge them all because of a few!!


like the dude in earlier post said, internet ain't no harder then in real life.A lot of it depends on self esteem,loving yourself first and past experiences.

I'm leaning more towards Carrie's Idea,stick around for the forums,if I happen to bump into
a woman that turns my crank,great!!!

Meanwhile I'll just keep making new friends and helping others if I can!

knight Rider!
 terry44030
Joined: 12/4/2005
Msg: 10
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 5:41:46 AM
I agree with you Knight Rider. the forums really kick butt. A buddy of mine uses my computer and emails - like, 10 women every day, and he has no better luck than I did when I emailed 2 a week. Now, I pretty much just stick with the forums.
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 11
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 6:03:29 AM
Oh! it's not just the internet dating is rough everywhere.
Can't help but to look at the photo but it's the character you'll be long term with so learn to look beeyond the photo.
 xxx2931
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 12
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 6:22:01 AM
people arent honest with themselves let alone the other parties involved
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 13
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 8:44:02 AM
Any place that you drop a lot of choices .. from different circles ... gives the people that candy store mentality.

I also like to point out to the ladies that every time you read/delete an incoming invitation, you are possibly chasing one more guy with some self respect, the incentive to go away and don't bother with this anymore. Hence, quickly, you end up with the bottom feeders.
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 14
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 8:53:14 AM
Many choices but it's like shopping for a new car at a wreck and repaired shop
 carrie bradshaw
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 15
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 9:34:14 AM
Bonjour;
This is why Carrie gets confused. Carrie is young and naive mon ami. She thought that if someone was taking the time to get to know another person, then it was just that person they were getting to know. This is how Carrie works, only one at a time. However, mon amie, this is not the case. Apparently as I have learned from email buddies yesterday, most men have many ladies going at the same time. Making each one feel special and that they are devoting so much time to getting to know just them. When in fact, the they are doing this with a few or many ladies. This is sad for Carrie to hear.

Carrie is here for the forums as she is too sweet and sensitive for this. If she finds someone, great. If not, she has her email buddies, her Kaos as her drinking buddy and the forums.
Have a great day everyone and bonne chance!
Carrie
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 16
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 11:40:57 AM
Well carrie .. next time a really cute guy with a good profile says hi .. think twice before read/deleting his email because you are chatting with just one guy ... who may or may not (most likely not) be the one
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 18
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/19/2006 4:48:22 PM
Then there's the theory that if you want something too much, it seems hard or hurts when you don't have it.

If you reduce the amount of wanting, you reduce the amount of hurting.

How can you do this?


Beats me!!
 RAFlady
Joined: 4/18/2006
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/21/2006 12:47:35 PM
Jeeeeez, that was my first thread and I didn't think anyone would reply.

Ok, few options.

1. Become a Nun (I am a convent girl anyway - and YES it's all true)
2. Just be happy on your own - I can do that now, once you stop searching, BANG 538 blokes come along.
3. Hard to focus on one person, because that ONE person could be dating/mailing another 10.

Oh I don't chuffin' know - a lesbian Nun that likes wine?? Yep I'm off to the convent see you there!!!

KazzyWazzBazz
aka Zany Girl
 RAFlady
Joined: 4/18/2006
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/21/2006 1:13:40 PM
mmmm

DATING = STRESS= HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE.
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 22
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/22/2006 11:49:55 PM
internet dating hard? -you've got to be kidding. its about as easy as ordering a pizza.
type in your zip, what you like: the pof computer pulls up a list of matches. when you find someone who seems compatable, send them a message. if they message back and are as intrigued as you. pick a place to meet and chat. how much easier can they make it? am i missing something? hello dominos? i want a pepperoni pizza, -and make sure the delivery girl is cute & available!
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 23
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/23/2006 9:28:29 AM
Having the "happy ever after" morality structure implanted on us with the fairy tales we/ve heard as children has caused women to view life through a 'fairy tale' filter.
Constantly looking for Mr. right (prince charming, the knight in shining armor, the guy in the white hat), women
tend to project this sense they need to be rescued from their own life.
'Happy ever after' is a fallacy and is an impossible goal to reach. By projecting an unrealistic goal for a man to achieve, women like this will mostly attract the many men that get sex by playing that one prince charming role.

The fairy tale begginings of a relationship are illusion that fades and women see they are not with Prince Charming, the men no more see the damsel distressed and real life sets in.

They find out they don't like one another, divorce and here we are!

Many women looking for the right one, The prince to show up with the other shoe, the white knight, the guy with the chemistry.

And many men trying to convince her, he's got the right shoe.

hmmmmmm.... Maybe that's why women like shoes so much!
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 24
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 4/23/2006 9:31:50 AM
BTW, I look at posts without pics too. There's many valid reasons people do not wish to have their image online.
 terry44030
Joined: 12/4/2005
Msg: 25
view profile
History
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 5/1/2006 12:03:23 AM
It would be nice if everyone wasn't looking for a 10. Be it physically perfect, perfect job, or whatever else.
 scopin
Joined: 4/22/2006
Msg: 26
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 5/1/2006 12:32:07 AM
Sh it,I don't even bother putting my photo up anymore because i just get abused by women coz they don't believe that it's a real photo of myself!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 27
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 9/30/2006 6:14:44 PM
Internet or real life ~ it's not easy in the dating world no matter where you meet someone.
 pebbles_2006
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 28
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 10/3/2006 2:21:25 PM
Is rather Superficial if u ask me? i have met some remarkable men in here that have pics on their profile & some who think that they are not gorgeous have the biggest heart than the ones that are gorgeous..

I have spoken to ones that completely Downsize that they are into the LOOK factor rather than getting to know the person for who they are & not for what they look like from the outside....

Too many expectations. Too many trials & errors.. Too many superficial ppl... Too many liars & doesnt really being honest with their intentions....

I have given up on dating too after my engagement ended seeing its my third one that slipped away to someone else while he is with me... So i think I am jinx.... despite the fact that i am told I am cute & quite appealing so I am sure it wont be hard for me out there but I am not looking anymore... I have given up too....
 Huggablehottie
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 29
Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!
Posted: 10/3/2006 2:42:42 PM
In a way, I think that Internet dating is actually harder, and I will try to explain
why I feel this way.
When you know someone from the net and you are going out to meet them,
you already have envisioned in your mind what this person will be like. Most
of the time, you are thinking with high expectations, all dreamy and in lala land.
Secondly, people lie on the net about things that you can not see, such as
their real height or weight, or age.
Also, people tend to only judge a profile by the pics on it...which is not
good.
You may not agree, but a lot of online daters are shallow minded. They
set the bar pretty high, because they think online dating is like ordering
from a menu.
Thanks, and bye!
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Why Is Internet Dating SO Hard!!