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 no1here
Joined: 11/15/2004
Msg: 2
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?Page 1 of 48    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
I would say don't take it personally. 85% of the women here wouldn't know a good thing if it hit them in the head. Personally I would think they would want a good guy but from experience it seems most don't know what they want and seem to pick guys that are least good for them. Its all just a big baffling world to me.....
 zyxananda
Joined: 6/9/2004
Msg: 12
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/18/2005 5:53:55 PM
I have dated many guys who were considered less atractive than myself. What I found was that while they liked having the arm charm, they were pretty insecure and would make continous verbal atempts to bring down my own self esteem. For some reason they thought this would keep me around.
Bye bye guy. One ex still calls after three years, yet when I am sweet enough to have a conversation with him, he ALWAYS turns into a pompus, bombastic jerk who tries to find a way to insult my acomplishments, looks, (I have no fat , he does) friends etc..
I do know many men who make up for lack of looks with personality and fortunately they aren't so shallow as to persue only "hot" girls. They, like I, really do look for something deeper.
 Zelgadis
Joined: 2/5/2005
Msg: 24
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/18/2005 9:29:02 PM
Actually that not true I have seen many hot guys date really nasty looking females. And to be honest all woman have flaws most just hide them with makeup
 miss music
Joined: 1/18/2005
Msg: 27
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Who do you ask out?
Posted: 2/18/2005 10:45:07 PM
How do you decide who you ask out?
Are you using the buck-shot technique? (Ask out as many girls as possible...eventually *someone* has to say yes)

Do you know what you have to offer?
Do you know what kind of woman would be attracted to your total package?

Do you know what kind of girl you are attracted to?
Do you know what kind of guy this fictional girl would date?

Is there a match? If not, you're going to have to make some changes. (Lord knows, you can't make someone else change!)
 greenjeep
Joined: 2/11/2005
Msg: 29
Who do you ask out?
Posted: 2/18/2005 11:40:11 PM
All I can say is drop the tie! Would you really wear one on a date? This ain't the '70s!

From a few notes back, don't compromise your principles. You are who you are, but loosen up and don't be afraid to talk to people. There's someone out there for you. There's someone out there for all of us. (Hopefully before we die!)
 scott546
Joined: 1/18/2005
Msg: 68
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/19/2005 5:35:43 PM
with some exceptions most of the "hot" girls do not even know they are hot so if it seems they end up with above average guys it's probably because that is the type of men who feel comfortable aproaching them. If you remember that confidence is a major turn on for women and keep track I think you will be rejected by the not so hot women just as often. Apply for a government grant to do a study and go out there and start your research. you may have trouble defining "hot" though. I knew a guy who liked his girls over 400 lbs.
 FRlENDS
Joined: 2/18/2005
Msg: 75
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/19/2005 8:21:57 PM

How come every hot girl I have tried to ask out turn away or say "sorry, your not my type" when they don't even know me or have even met me? I think most girls are to superficial espically in high school.


90% of women go for 10% of guys.
The only card you'll usually have is if you have money.
Sometimes thats not the case.
 FRlENDS
Joined: 2/18/2005
Msg: 77
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/20/2005 2:57:49 AM

We forgot how to lead and women are tired of it


Maybe where not allowed to anymore?

Maybe expectations are unrealistic?


Obviously there has to be some physical attractiveness but it is only a small part.


Exactly. Beauty fades, dumb is forever - good footnotes for both guys and girls
 Rettam
Joined: 1/30/2005
Msg: 78
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/20/2005 3:05:46 AM
Let's not forget that shallowness runs in both genders, and I'd say it runs even deeper in guys.

It's even harder being a girl, I imagine, because in general guys regard looks as sort of a prerequisite to considering someone for dating. True: guys (dare I say in all optimism, most guys?) weigh personality as the most important thing in looking for a girl because looks only go so far. But guys won't even think about dating a girl they don't know very well unless they thought she was hot FIRST. If you're attractive, you get into the "to be considered pile" and if you're not, well, then extenuating circumstances will have to apply, such as insider info about how funny she is. Hell, maybe you get to know the girl and everything changes, but intitially, where there's no other info, I think both sexes do this.

But I have a feeling women put less emphasis on the looks department - I think they're actually less strict about it. Instead they also look hard for personality, even though it's rather impossible to tell from a breif conversation. Maybe it's this part that makes it even harder for the guy - you might be a good looking guy, but if you dress wrong, you're out. But she's still discriminating based on personality somewhat & not entirely on looks. What I'm saying is it's more mixed.

I think 4evafresh has made a very valid point. Let's not kid ourselves. There are leagues, but the great thing is it's easier to jump leagues than it is to change your personality. So if your personality is great, getting a new look is simple. Girls that are "hot" tend to look for the same because, well, what other information do they have to go on in the begining anyway? You can always change your look, and I suppose it's shallow in a sense, but when the ratio of guys to girls on here is 13-1 US guys are the fish. They have to pick and choose from a pile of people and they don't want to spend the time gettin gto know all 50 guys that mailed them great messages.
 FRlENDS
Joined: 2/18/2005
Msg: 90
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/20/2005 12:05:05 PM

Steve, thought you may have a point. The things you discribe people find attractive are more a result of socialization then natural instinct


I tent to disagree. 2 Million years of evolution builds some pretty hard core traits into all beings.

If that weren't the case:
Babies wouldn't pay more attention to "prettier faces" telling stories (human behavior studies)
Single Cats wouldn't naturally gravitate to litter boxes or teath without an example to follow.

I won't discount your theory entirely, learned behavior is also very crucial, we had a rabbit who thought it was a cat.

Regardless, people polled from all over the world overwhelmingly share opinions that are consistent with Steve's argument.
It's unlikey given the many cultures / beliefs / customs that humans favor the same traits our of coincidence.
 Kelso01
Joined: 1/15/2005
Msg: 97
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/20/2005 4:21:25 PM
LOL.. what a burn buddy..

I've never had a girl say that.. ahaha..


sorry if i seem rude, but maybe if u had a great personality.. u might be able to find a hot looking girl..

GOD help u though
 quixoticus
Joined: 2/20/2005
Msg: 104
 quixoticus
Joined: 2/20/2005
Msg: 120
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/20/2005 7:45:33 PM
Wait here I'll do a national poll and get back to you with the results.
 Cool_like_Waters
Joined: 2/2/2005
Msg: 126
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/26/2005 10:12:05 AM
[do guys really obsess]

i wouldn't call it obsession. Maybe ponder.......yeah that's it ponder.
 Masked_Hero
Joined: 12/14/2003
Msg: 128
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/26/2005 11:58:18 AM
Yo Jazzy Trumpet... Keep'n it real !!! Unless your in American pie 2 kick'n it with Shanon Elizebeth, your sterotypical hot girl is just not gonna kick it wit a dorky dude. Not anything more then friends anyways. Yeah women say that looks and style are not important, but these same women are the ones who lust after the LL Cool Jay's and Vin Disels of the world..How many women do you know fantasize about Bill Gates ? Or Dr. Phil ? Other then probably spend'n their money !! I'm not tell'n you to change or nuff'n cus the number one thing is to be yourself and to love yourself. But at the sametime there is nuff'n wromg with add'n a lil style and flare to your wardrobe. Watch the movie "Hitch" I'm sure you'll be able to relate to it. It should still be play'n at your local movie theater !! GOOD LUCK WIT THE LADIES BRO !! I'm pull'n for ya !
 angel_Delight35
Joined: 1/13/2005
Msg: 129
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/26/2005 12:07:41 PM
that quiestion could be turned around also, as to why does a hot guy never give a average looking girl a chance, i think looks or age shouldnt matter in a realtionship, but to some ppl it does, personailty and a sense of humor should be first way before looks, because if u end up with a beautiful person on the outside but they have no personality then you are in for a boring relationship, and there looks will fade in time, but there sense of humor and personilty will remain!!
 Masked_Hero
Joined: 12/14/2003
Msg: 131
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 2/26/2005 12:18:28 PM
This is very true... alas we as humans always want the "shiny" Things .... Kids don't eat veggies cus they look gross. Yes whats on the inside is very good for them the vitamins will help them grow big and strong. But.... as children we'd rather have candy !!! It looks sooo good so glamerous but yet it rots our teeth and can turn us into fat obeist adults... We work so hard in our adult life. If you dream of driving 2005 Ford focus please rais your hand ? Its so reliable on the inside won't give you any troubles great car ! Now if you dream of drving a 2005 Lexus convertable please raise your hand... Hmmm I'm see'n a lot more hands. Both cars do the same thing they take me to freak'n work ! Sorry to say this but to humans whats on the outside REALLY does matter ! Thats why today when you went to the grocery store buying apples you but back the apple that had a dent in the skin and picked up the real shiny red apple !
 aradienne
Joined: 12/31/2004
Msg: 151
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 7/12/2005 3:21:26 PM
I dated an "average" looking guy that I was nuts about....except for him telling me constantly that he didn't deserve me and what did I want with him and he didn't have anything to offer me. He finally convinced me.

I'd rather put up with the**** attitude than that any day.
 who_the_fox
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 152
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 7/12/2005 3:32:43 PM

I dated an "average" looking guy that I was nuts about....except for him telling me constantly that he didn't deserve me and what did I want with him and he didn't have anything to offer me. He finally convinced me.


Yep...there is nothing attractive about a man who keeps going on about me being "out of his league". It just means he is insecure and I don't want to play therapist, thanks.
 jimmyzorro1979
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 154
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 7/18/2005 5:25:36 AM
The awnser too this question is easy. Everyone is worried about everyone elses opinion. (Such as)...... WHat would maria think if she saw us together.or such beleifs. You see even rich people don't marry poor peoples. Basic problem is most of us Judge poeple by looks intellegence physical appearance or socio-ecenomic status. Not for what really makes a person attractive. That would be The good qualaties, such as kindness understanding Honesty Trust . Of all these Trust is No 1. Hope I helped clear a deeper angle of the thread. TY JimmyZorro
 canadianbakeun
Joined: 1/9/2006
Msg: 174
Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 3/5/2006 5:11:27 AM
i can't believe how many ugly chicks are answering this question.....
 shaman312
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 186
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 9/4/2006 8:46:17 PM
I didn't read all 8 pages, so I don't know if this has been brought up:

Average-looking guys aren't the only ones getting the cold shoulder from attractive women. Looks are a huge issue in the alternative dating scene, too. If you're not a super model, most "lip stick" women won't give you the time of day.
 withoutcha
Joined: 8/13/2006
Msg: 192
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 9/5/2006 5:32:35 AM
im sorry, but once again, i find a post i cant resist, average? hot looking? o ok i get what your saying, you labeled it wrong, plastic , superficial, self centered, stuck up, look at me im beautifull kinda loser girl? if she wasnt all that she would give you a chance, having said that? what do you consider hot? and whats average? i dont know, what i do know is, the woman im seeing right now is a 10, although i havent turned her inside out to look , maybe if you were looking for something other than outside beauty, you would find a ten too, :0) yes patty im talking about you babe, alan
 Rettam
Joined: 1/30/2005
Msg: 194
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 10/29/2006 11:15:55 AM
^^^^

I think there is lots of truth to what markeeoo is saying, though there are a few parts I'm sure people contrue in a way that's very controversial.

But as I read what he says, nothing he has propositioned is really all that false. And I will be happy to put up a defense on lots of these points, with my own variations on a few.



There is one thing that many people tend to bring up in discussions like this that adds nothing at all, in my opinion to the REAL questions behind the matter. And is questions like "what is your definition of beautiful" or "beauty is subjective." In about 80% of the topics on this site, there is no need to address this issue at all, because what people usually mean is not what is beautiful, but what is under higher demand.

If you replace the question "can an average looking guy get a pretty girl" with the statement "can a guy who is not sough after as much by girls get a girl that is sought after by porportionately more people" nothing is really lost in answering the latter question instead of the first.

I think the same goes for markeeoo's post above, and probably every post here. Yet in a few posts you'll see someone calling this guy shallow or superficial for not realizing that beauty is subjective.

People are HUNG UO on the subjectivity of beauty. In most posts, its actually a cop-out retort that adds nothing to what we already know. I think that' s a lost cause - yes beauty is subjective... but what's at work here that's causing all the dissapointment, why some people are coveted by many while others can't get a response to save thier lives, is not BEAUTY. It's demand for the same group of people. You can call them ugly or stupid or plastic, but what remains the same is that lots of people desire them.

So stop calling them beautiful or pretty or whatever if you like. It doesn't cahnge the fact that some people have waaaay more options in terms of who to choose from than others. It's not about beauty. It's about demand. And demand changes your life. The picture of LA that markeeoo talks about sounds like this concept is taken to the extreme there.

People tend to avoid the more painful questions around that by dismissing it as a tendancy for people to be shallow or judging a book by its cover. Even if the world was reduced to a non-visual existence, this would not go away, and the truth that beauty is in the eye of the beholder doesn't explain or solve a thing. Some people will still be more popular than others for one reason or another, and others will be depressed about it because they feel hopeless to change it. THAT's the problem... and there's not real solution, which is what makes some of these whiner threads so frustrating to read,yet compelling becasue it reveals something true about dating.

I think the phenomenon is deeper and more disturbing than just "looks."
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 195
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Why do hot girls never give a chance to an average looking guy?
Posted: 10/29/2006 11:27:34 AM
Let's just make this simple. If the OP is only interested in a woman because of her looks then he can hire an escort and show her off around town, at the company party, etc. People generally who are that hung up on how their date looks is only out to impress other people. For some, having a hot sexy woman on their arm is the same as showing off a new car, a Rolex watch....etc....ad nauseum.
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