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Show ALL Forums  > Ontario  > the longer your single the better it is?      Home login  
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 DivineBovine
Joined: 5/13/2005
Msg: 8
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the longer your single the better it is?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
mirage, you sound like Carrie on Sex & the City!



complacency?

i honestly don't know.... having never been married at my age is totally different for someone my age or older looking again.

i do know that i didn't want to be alone, that i wanted to SHARE my life - even my tv addiction (though i'd like to find an excuse to break it) and all those silly things, like eating ice cream on days like today.

i don't know if it's complacency or fear of being alone... maybe a bit of both?

what i do know is that i found someone wonderful and i'd be more of a damn fool idiot to let him walk out of my life than to take the leap of faith!

 Gumper1
Joined: 8/13/2005
Msg: 21
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the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/29/2006 9:40:27 PM
And what's wrong with being happy on your own? Nothing, in fact, if you do happen to meet that "special one", I'd hope you can bring that to the table. That you're secure in yourself, not needy, and come with the knowledge of the past.
If we can't be truly happy independent, how can we expect to be happy in a union? Isn't that asking/expecting too much? It's tantamount to having a baby to save the relationship....doesn't work.
 DivineBovine
Joined: 5/13/2005
Msg: 30
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the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/30/2006 4:29:06 AM

Is nobody in here comfortable with themselves?


lots of us are...


I don't believe in that special someone that can change your life


neither did i ... then i met him.


if you are really happy with who you are and how your life is and can enjoy the company of your family and friends why should you bring someone in to complicate things?


as That's Amore said, if you consider that a complication, you shouldn't be in a relationship, but it's BECAUSE I AM happy with who i am and how my life is that i know i'm ready for a relationship.

almost a year ago, i made decisions to take steps to change my life to get the one i wanted instead of the mere existence that i had. once i started taking those steps, i think i paved the way to the happier me that attracted the things i wanted - a new job in a new city, and a new love.
 Kiaa
Joined: 4/2/2006
Msg: 37
the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/30/2006 7:08:10 AM
i have been single for 3 years and i cant stand it. at first i loved being alone but now its depressing and all my frineds are taken so i feel like a thrid wheel. i wish i had someone.
 Holy Grail
Joined: 8/29/2005
Msg: 43
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the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/30/2006 9:04:07 AM
I hate being single and I don't want to ever get used to it. That being said... I'm not gonna jump into any kind of relationship just for the sake of it either.
 SexiestManInTheUniverse
Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 48
the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/30/2006 2:23:45 PM
If your a women yes, if your a guy, long periods of being alone can be hard. Women can typically find men, a partner, very easily, so they have the luxury of some so called "me time".
 oneafternoon
Joined: 3/15/2005
Msg: 53
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the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 5/30/2006 7:05:40 PM
I find the longer people live in there own worlds ... the harder it is for them too come out of it.
 longlocks
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 61
the longer your single the better it is?
Posted: 6/1/2006 3:02:43 PM
I have come out of a 10 year marriage, separated now for almost 2 years. I also have just ended a 6 month relationship. I have never been single, never dated, married out of school, and here i am today, learning "how" to be single. i have read some books on the subject and gained a lot of usefull information. I am not good at being alone, if the house is empty i go out, shopping, dancing, what ever, i go by myself. after ths last relationship i have finally realized that being single is ok for me. i still date, but i dont think ill be jumping into any commitments any time soon, time for my self. i like the idea of being able to watch oprah without someone comming over and changing the channel. not having to do the dinner thing, it dosent matter if i leave my panties on the bathroom floor! and if i want to go....anywere, anytime...i go!!
cheers to all the single people out there who have become comfortable with themselves. you have to love yourself first before you can love anyone else!!

and if anyone needs a night out friend im always up for it! keep me in the loop, im sure i could lean a lot more from all the single lifestyles out there!

great thread! thanks for reading

signed: "learning to live single!"

 LoversEntwined
Joined: 4/20/2006
Msg: 66
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Is Taking Yourself Out To Dinner Wierd?
Posted: 6/14/2006 8:21:32 PM
Good thread ...
One of my best friends is a woman who is turning 75 this summer. Being recently single, she and I were talking and she was saying how she is beyong the need for a partner anymore. I have never known her to be with anybody in the 14ish years I have known her, but I do know that she is at the center of a community of some 300-400 friends, who all love and respect her. What a birthday bash she's gonna have this summer!
As for me, well, I was single when I was 30. It was a very happy time for me, not answering to anybody, doing and going where and when i wanted, and not feeling I had to justify or answer for any of my actions. Then I fell into a five and a half year relationship, and the whole time I felt it was wrong, that I was settling, and I was becoming an angry and bitter man, because I knew I didn't want to be there.
Now, I'm still adjusting. I still want that closeness, yet I do feel I want to know me again. It's only been a couple of months, and I know it will get better, hopefully back to what it was like when I was 30, but now, I'm heading towards 40. Starting over seems to take more energy than it did before, or maybe I have more I want to do that I missed.
I don't mind taking myself out to dinner. Did it last night actually. I usually bring a sketchbook and either write or draw, or I'll simply people watch and try to blend into the wood work. Didn't get a kiss good night, but I think I have another date ...
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