|Pathological LiarsPage 1 of 15 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)|
After reading this I thought you were talking about my ex-boyfriend I had for 8 month while I was in the Middle East. Boy was he good. "Feel sorry for me", "Everybody is out to get me". What a scumbag. You'll get over your ex. He's not worse it!
Posted: 7/19/2006 5:47:51 PM
|eek thought you were talking about my ex too |
Posted: 7/24/2006 12:56:26 PM
|I have come across many women who say they are honest and not like the other women |
and they turned out to be a pathological liar.
I'm thinking now that I want a woman who says she is a pathological liar and just like the other women and I'm hoping that she will turn out to be honest.
Posted: 8/2/2006 8:32:41 AM
|Me thinks that masquerading under the guise of a stinking dead fish is even worse! ha!|
Obviously, these forums are rampant with immatuity from all the fotos of dead fish and everything else you can think of....instead of just a simple foto of the actual person. Is that supposed to be clever? I don't get it. I know, I am digressing...and straying off thread... this is just one of my little pet peeves. I just think people ought to have the courtesy...and the 'courage', to put up a "real' picture of themselves. Thats all!
Ok. Pathological liars. Whether the professional is a real one or not... the post was right on. Go get your basic text on abnormal psychology and read for yourself. Its true.
The truth is. No one gets 'blind sided' by a pathological liar. If you have been with one for a time..... the behaviors are evident and abundunt. You have just denied and rationalized the lies and abusive behaviors in your own desparate attempts to somehow make sense out of them. The so-called blindsiding is just that time when the abusive behaviors have reached a critical mass over time, and your old denials ect. don't work anymore. I understand, I have been there.
As always... the focus belongs on ourselves, not on the offender. Learn to protect yourself. that is the answer. "We teach people how to treat us" First off. You don't let anyone get away with a lie... more than Once! And, if someone exhibits a pattern of lying. Run Forrest, Run! And don't look back! The mental health profession can scarcely help these people... YOU sure can't!!!
Posted: 8/12/2006 12:18:35 PM
|Good Post: Needed to be said. Fortunately I've had more lyers in money than love. Most liars I've known were men???? Wonder if men are more inclined to lie?|
Posted: 8/12/2006 1:11:24 PM
|There's one on site now..very much married..just out for sex..bigjohnmarine|
Posted: 8/13/2006 6:15:37 AM
|Thanks for the info on the website. Your words about the hunter and using charm are so very true|
Posted: 9/3/2006 9:05:58 PM
|Great Post! You must have dated the exact same guy I did. I feel like a fool it took me so long to believe he was lying even though I knew he was doing exactly that all the time. He was very charming along with this problem so he had two things going for him. He's going going GONE now. ThHank goodness.|
Posted: 9/4/2006 6:55:01 PM
Just wanted to put in a little input....most times these people DO NOT mean it to be bad. Alot of times they come from abusive families, or relationships, and lie to escape everything, or out of fear, or to try to make their world different in their mind. It's an escape. They're not bad, they dont mean to hurt. they're just psychologically tormented and are trying to protect themself from imaginary enemies, which include you. They dont need your crap or criticism, they need love and reassurance.
Posted: 9/4/2006 8:13:10 PM
|If you have lived with... had children with, and attempted to actually build a life with the types that are being talked about here..... you won't be so quick to get into the scientific vs. subjective...vz. whatever arguments. You will understand that these types are VERY real. They do exist..... and they are dangerous. What particular name or lable we may choose to apply to them is actually just interesting.... but prob. not worth aarguing about. |
I aggree that the Mental health fields main expertise is probably just intense observation and labeling. Their 'treatments' leave much to be desired still. But, In my personal experience, I think the labels and observations seem fine. If someone wants to call it something else.... I really don't care. As shakespear has allreadys saidlong ago... 'a rose is a rose is a rose".
As for being compassionate and understanding with these types? I'll leave that up to the rest of you. In my opinion.... there might be yet another label to pin on these types. One that really quantifies what they are, and what they do....EVIL! Frankly my dear... I don't give a damn what happened to them when they were little...... They are dangerous and evil!
One can get wised up about recognizing these people. Actually, anyone can recognize them. Its just that, those of us who have not learned to listen to our inner selves, have low self esteem, or are still slaves to our emotions..... are vulnerable to them. Their silver tounge is all they have. Well...... with women..... it could be their tremendous sexuality (which they use like the finest tool). But... they are easy to see. You just have to turn on your radar... and leave it on! With these types... you MUST focus on behavior. It will reveal them in short order. GET AWAY!
Posted: 9/6/2006 6:53:27 AM
|I hear ya. I was married to a horrible man like this. For over 23 yrs., I put up with this kind of behavior, I finally got away from him after he nearly killed me and he got away with it. He made me look like an idiot. This is what manipulator's do. Good luck to all the women who has had to go through this....|
Posted: 9/6/2006 1:30:38 PM
|Good luck to all the men that have had to tolerate that kind of abusive behaviour too.|
I wonder if anyone knows what the frequency of occurence is between the genders for bi-polar and histronic disorders?
Posted: 9/6/2006 6:50:50 PM
|Just wanted to say,|
These people are from messed up families and abusive backgrounds. BELEIEVE ME,they have gone thru more kleenex since the day they were born then u have since the day u got into that relationship. THey may seem stubborn, inobstinate, shameless... but they're human beings. They do have so many feelings. Most are locked up out of fear, and lies are all they can say.
When you're growing up, afraid of getting beaten, raped...you learn to lie when people ask you for information, quesstions, favors...
As you grow older, you've gotten so used to it, u cant stop. YOu think everyone is out to get you, and are plotting against you.
Trust me, voice of experience.
Posted: 9/7/2006 10:31:24 AM
If it were only that simple!!
But its not!!
If a person is victimized,by control and abuse..no matter the disorder
the perpetrator conceals; Its a damned if you do..and damned if
you don't circumstance!!
There is only one way to deal with this...and that way is out!!
No matter what you have to do...to get out!!
Just Do IT!!
Posted: 9/7/2006 10:42:07 AM
i just got out of a relationship with a girl i met online. she lied about everything. including her first name(and her son's). i found out she made up her whole life to me and anyone else she met. she took my heart and $1000. yet to this day i would take her back in a heartbeat. i miss her so much even though she hurt me real bad. something is seriously wrong with me.
I understand your feeling this way. I dated a guy...fell hard for him. But, I have finally figured out that he is a compulsive liar. He lied about things that didn't even matter. But, as you...I would have taken him back in a heartbeat....Not now..I am done! But, I understand how you feel. Good luck to you...it is hard to get over someone...even if you know it is wrong.
Posted: 9/8/2006 7:00:17 AM
People can change if they want to, and that is what it boils down to wanting to, if they have some sucker putting up with their crap they are not going to what reason should they for. I do believe only God can change people,s hearts. they can learn to be better people but they have to want to.
I agree and yes only God can change peoples hearts. We can't change nothing on our own, and the evidence repeatedly continues to reveal itself to us that we are a bunch of snobbish people and lying is all over and it happens all the time , everywhere.
One group of lyers that really irrates me, is those that say something good or nice to you to make you think they mean it and they sucker or try to sucker you into beleiveing them and in effect they look down on your and see you as inferior to them as if you are not worthy of being told the truth and cared for.
I have really zero tolerance for that and I have been a victim of that and I have seen many that have done that to others. They don't care how you feel or what you perceive, they just tease you nontheless and thats a big irritation to me and I'm sure many others do too.
Posted: 9/8/2006 8:25:42 AM
In some cases maybe ..a dysfunctional childhood; though society induced
Different disorders can bare resemblance and contain the same symptons.
Yes with God's help people can attain,direction, by paying attention
to where he leads them for that direction,in order to achieve a more
healthy and productive..Life.
Even though 'pathological lying' can be hurtful..and destructive to
others; the pathological liar...is in a state of denial, because of
thier inward pain. They feel insecure with who they are and produce
to protect..themselves; a pattern of lieing>
A pattern that soon becomes thier reality to be seen , heard..
accepted by others. In turn, to show themselves is a fear
incomprehensible to them, as they feel they are not good enough.
as and who they truly are!
It becomes so destructive..they actually 'believe' the lies they tell.
to be their own truth. That is their survival mechanism.
No this behaviour is not condoned, yet simply stating..that an
individual must been in alot of torment within themselves..to
adopt...and percieve as truth..a distorted personality of deceit!!
They need first to establish the fact..that it is ok..to be themselves.
There is help..out there..and that is the first step..
and with therapy and trust in faith in your higher power,(God)
There can be success!
In this world..no one will ever achieve perfection; Yet...they
can take the step to feeling better about who they are,
in in turn..how they relate to others.
and thats my morning 'sense'
Posted: 10/13/2006 5:06:29 AM
|My X was a pathological liar. They are what is known in medical terms in psychiatry as "Sociopaths"....if you go to the internet look up sociopathic style...Marion Trent is well informed on the subject, and she covers it in masterly detail. I just spent 7 years with one. By the end of the relationship I began to question my own sanity....get out while there is time!!!!|
The have this "stare" about them, they believe their own lies, and have NO CONSCIENCE!!.....it may take a good deal of therapy, and many self help books to recover from the emotional and mental sometimes physical and financial damage done....but you can pull through it.....
Posted: 10/17/2006 10:14:13 AM
|Even though most of us come from dysfunctional homes, we are not |
addicted to lying.
I hate liars.
I think that liars know that, it is just that they don't
care who they hurt.
Posted: 10/17/2006 10:40:21 AM
|I've been sucked in by those people many times. I still want to believe that people are good and honest. It hurts to find out otherwise. I go into denial to postpone facing the truth.|
I'm sorry you have had this pain. You are not alone.
There is Goodness and a God.
Posted: 10/18/2006 12:51:07 PM
just as good as dontdatehimgirl.com
but you can also give a glowing recommendation instead of just trashing a liar/cheater/player - I like that!
Posted: 10/18/2006 3:13:52 PM
|Is nothing bad with you jadey83. I met someone on line who lie to me so bad... includidng his firts name he told me his name was Francisco but his real name is Marcial, he lie me about his age he told me 36 but he was 41, he gave me 2 diferent adress... too.|
he was lieing for a whole year and he made me change a plane ticket... for more than 10 times so... i waste like a 2000 dollars in this liar.
And after this i used to miss him... is nothing wrong with you it happens... but u will get better im sure....not all the women are like her, and im hopeful that not all the men are like him
A big kiss for you
Posted: 10/27/2006 9:10:14 PM
|You have posted some very interesting facts here. My ex fiance of 4 years fit each criteria to a "T", I felt like he was always lying because of low self esteem. He not only lied to me, but also to friends, family and his employer and coworkers. I think he need psychological help, but at least he is no longer my problem. Thank God.|
Posted: 11/5/2006 5:48:13 PM
|How do you know this? Was he anilized by a psycologist? and if divorcing,could be venting..plus you deleted your profile,and are young,im 47,and theres alot more to all this with alot of metal illness involved people..|
Posted: 5/14/2007 8:11:37 AM
|hard to figure out when someone is lying to you when there whole family lies also, yep a whole family of pathalogical liar's, and the worse part about it is they think its funny, "a family trait" so to speak, I listened to that for 18 years before I figured out he had another woman on the side and the whole family knew and incouraged it... try that one on and see what happens to your self esteem ... I still wonder sometimes how many lies I missed, even the part where he said he loved me.... all lies took me 18 years to get the message, but when I finally did , I realized everything about the 18 years was in fact a lie ......... shame on me!|