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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Did we loose faith in marriage?      Home login  
Joined: 6/7/2005
Msg: 3
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Did we loose faith in marriage?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
It'snatrual to want to warn people of impending disaters. If you knew the bridge up ahead was out, wouldn't you try to warn other drivers?

The only ones that congratulate people on their up coming marriage are divorce lawyers as they hand you thier card....
Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 21
Did we loose faith in marriage?
Posted: 8/27/2006 12:34:00 PM
Last night I went to a hen's night. We were quite a big group and we really enjoyed it. However, a lot of people, males and females of all ages, were stopping the bride to be, and questioned her why on earth she is going to get married! At first no one bothered but after some time a lot of people, who we don't know, were sort of 'warning' her about marriage. We all felt puzzled and a bit disappointed about their approach to marriage.

Well, to be honest, I think the time to talk about marriage and it's pitfalls to your friends might be better served before the groom asks and before the bride accepts. Don't get me wrong, I think marriage is the biggest scam since college bookstores, parking lots in big cities and car insurance. But at some point, when two people have crossed a certain point in the decision towards marriage, throwing cold water on them is kind of tasteless.

And if you were gonna stop anyone, stop the groom. Why would anyone talk the bride out of it? As long as she's marrying upwards, statistically speaking, she's got nothing to lose. She's happy but wants to leave him anyway? She gets half his shit. She's unhappy and wants to leave him anyway? She gets half his shit. For most women, marriage is like jumping in the sewer and coming out smelling like roses with a loaf of bread under each arm and a Thanksgiving ham in your hands. For most men, marriage is like jumping in a sewer, breaking both your legs and getting gnawed on by the alligator some kid flushed down the toilet five years ago.

But yeah, even knowing all that, if a woman has made the choice to do it and say "Yes" to a proposal and has had time to think about it, I wouldn't try to begrudge her her shot at happiness. As for the man? Well if he's already made the decision in his mind to one day, in the future, buy a person he doesn't like a house with all his stuff in it, including his dignity, then that's on him and him alone.
Joined: 3/26/2006
Msg: 27
Did we loose faith in marriage?
Posted: 8/27/2006 1:57:46 PM
Just my viewpoint...

Back when our grandparents were married, men and women really relied on each other for survival.

Similar to caveman days, when the man clobbered dinner and mom cooked it and cared for the cavekid.

Nowadays, women are very capable of providing for themselves. There are fewer reasons for a woman to keep a man around these days (science is even doing away with procreation);)

I think women are much more demanding as a result (maybe why 85% of divorces are filed by the woman). Women also believe in life after love (I think Cher announced this )

Great men are as rare as great women. Is there a lid for every pot? I don't know...

But perhaps it's worth looking for...

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