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Show ALL Forums  > Pennsylvania  > Is smoking a deal breaker?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 6
Is smoking a deal breaker?Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
well i myself also smoke.......cigarettes that is. my doctor told me soooo many times to quit and i told him no way!!! when he asked me why i simply told him that the reason that i'm not going to quit smoking is because the non smokers keep pushing the issue of cancer and lung disease, low birth weight babies and all. i told him that if and when they stop with the preaching then i "might" quit. now as for cancer.......we are all born with all types of diseases in us it's just the person's ammunity that helps fight it off. low birth weight babies....yeah right. my sister-in-law quit smoking (only during her pregnancy) because the him telling her that she can have tiny babies. well, my oldest nephew weight under 6lbs and his little brother weighed a few ounces more than him. i smoked during both of my pregnacies, my older son was 8lbs 2ozs and my younger son was 8lbs 12ozs. it's not the cigarette smoking that causes low birth weight it's in the genes of the parents. with both of my boys my older son's father, my younger son's father and myself were all between 8-9lbs at birth. my brother was a little over 8lbs and his wife was between 6-7lbs.

as for smoking in front of non smokers, if i'm in the public or a public place yes i will smoke but if i'm in their car or home then no i will not smoke. if i feel the need for a cigarette i would either go outside and smoke a cigarette or wait until i'm out of the car.

now as for cigarette smoking being a deal breaker............no it's not!!! if and when i meet a man and he and i are very interested in me, i'm sorry......."take me as i am, not what you want me to be!!!"

@lovin.......i'm sorry to hear about your son but is he going through the treatments because of cigarette smoking? i hope that he's doing much better. can you please give him a from me and everyone else here, he's an angel and a special one at that and don't let anyone think otherwise of him
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 7
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/25/2006 10:51:48 AM
sorry but it reposted so i thought that i would let everyone know why i'm here a 2nd time.........silly me. :(
 loves being tickled
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 8
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/25/2006 1:29:57 PM
loveinpink74...very sorry to hear about your child...I hope all is well with now.
What is a walkin psa?

I smoke but I always try to be curtious about it. I don't smoke around my son or at his sporting events or in front of his friends. I don't smoke around anyone who it bothers.
I've had men write me and say things like....I guess I can deal with your smoking....or....Your smoking is ok as long as not around me....well then....exactly how do they think we are going to date?
I'd love to quit smoking, I've tried....I realize it's a shortcoming...but for now It is something I do.
I*t is a deal breaker...I will date men who don't smoke but not if it bothers them. I feel pretty sure it has stopped some men from contacting me but I'm up front with it.
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 15
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/27/2006 5:54:35 PM
@paqueen..........I don’t want to get attached to someone who is killing themselves one cigarette at a time.

didn't you know that with every breath that you take, you're breathing in death? what about that, would you date someone because they're afraid to leave their home and wear rubber gloves and a face mask at all times?
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 16
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/27/2006 5:54:52 PM
@paqueen..........I don’t want to get attached to someone who is killing themselves one cigarette at a time.

didn't you know that with every breath that you take, you're breathing in death? what about that, would you date someone because they're afraid to leave their home and wear rubber gloves and a face mask at all times?
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 19
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/30/2006 12:34:49 AM
@ross.........thank you, there are entirely too many things that are more important around us than just cigarette smoking. i'm a smoker and proud to admit it but even if i were a non smoker i'd much rather go with a smoker than a junkie, alcoholic, drug dealer, or murderer. as for philly, it wasn't until rizzo died then the city went to pot. frank jr was just like his father and if anyone were to take the city back it would be him since frank sr is no longer among us. (rip uncle frank)

@pa...........that's what i always say. it's with every breath that we take and have taken since birth. oh, other than that, great minds think alike huh?
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 22
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 9/30/2006 9:13:04 PM
sorry cuteone..........once again bullshit!!! my nephews both have adhd and like i said, their mother QUIT SMOKING. there is nothing wrong with my boys except my younger son has flat feet. oh, do you think that is from smoking too? NO! it's in the genes that are passed on in the bloodline. now if anyone wants to waste their money on having their kids tested for adhd go right ahead. adhd is only another dollar handed down.........down the drain that is. it was only up until a few years ago when the doctors came out with adhd. where was it 10,20,30, or 50 years ago. there was no such thing.

cigarette smoking does not cause cancer, it may increase the risk of cancer but it is not the primary cause of cancer. cigarette smoking is not the cause of low birth weight or premature babies. cigarette smoking is not the cause of adhd. and for your information, no i am no exception to any rule. just proven fact.

"And just so you know... My 6 year old daughter just had brain surgery to do a biopsy on a tumor they found in her brain. I never smoked while I was pregnant and she is not subjected to any second hand smoke. It just happened. What if I were a smoker? I can't even imagine what else my baby would be diagnosed with. and I don't want to go somewhere public and have my kids surrounded by people like you who have no consideration for others."

wow, you were a non smoker and your daughter had brain surgery for a tumor and you didn't smoke? yeah, it just happened. it was nature at it's work. i feel bad about what your daughter went through but hey, bad things happen to the best of us, it's just sad to hear that it had to happen to an innocent child.

and as for smoking in a public place, it's my choice.......if there were "no smoking" signs posted, no i wouldn't smoke but as long as there are no signs posted i will smoke anywhere i damn well please.

"Get off your high horse and quit smoking so the rest of us can lead a healthy life. You have the right to smoke and kill yourself but you DO NOT have the right to make that decision for the rest of us"

i'm not on any high horse hun, it's my choice. it's people like you that choose to live an unhappy life, a stressful life by doing nothing but "PREACHING". i'm not in sunday school anymore, i'm a big girl now, i'm old enough to wipe my own ass, therefore i'm old enough to know when someone is talking sh*t!

I hope PA passes the no-smoking law for the rest of the state, not just Philadelphia.

i hope it does too, then the government would see what kind of ***holes they really are with the debt that the country would go in. now maybe the day i quit smoking would be the day that the government decides to stop giving "our" money away to the people that come to our country and starts to make them pay taxes from day 1 with them being here, stops giving them money to start their own business here in our country. i don't see the government or our country doing any of that.

speaking of pa and the government.............pennsylvania is an "at-will" state. well, it can stay an at-will state but as long as i pay my taxes it is my free will as a united states citizen to do as i damn well please..........now as for the government, that's just too funny. i remember growing up and in school learning about the "declaration of independence", "the constitution of the united states", and what is it with those amendments? ok, the declaration of independence......ok, no more slavery, but don't we have to bust our asses just to make barely enough money to make ends meet. we are all slaves to the government little does everyone know. we bust our asses and pay our taxes and then some to make the government rich. the constitution of the united states.....ummm, if i'm not mistaken, doesn't it start out as "we the people, for the people". umm, yeah, right, we the monkeys for the organ grinder is more like it. and forget about those ammendments........the right to bare arms, yeah, either you pull up your sleeve or some idiot gives a gun to some ***hole and he goes shooting everyone for example with the phrase "going postal".

well i'm done saying what i had to say............damn, now that i got that off my chest, how is everyone doing?
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 27
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 10/1/2006 8:43:01 PM
@mastermind............denial is an ugly thing? you're such a sh*t. just because you quit smoking 2 months ago now you're going to also be a walking psa? bullsh*t, who are you kidding.
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 30
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 10/2/2006 7:56:41 AM
yes, i admit smoking while i was pregnant and my doctor knew all about it. ummm, sh*t, no, i wasn't dropped off of any bus but maybe it was when then damn trees jumped out in front of me while sledding down juniata golf course hill, or no, wait, maybe it was when my little brother hit me in the head with a golf club..........fourrrrrrrrrrrrrr, whack

they have but only one word for you or maybe 2 words..........idiot or a$$hole. grow up and get a life. if degrading cigarette smokers is all you can do then f*ckoff!
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 32
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 10/2/2006 8:36:35 PM
only with you hun since you know how to put other people down......... i've been toying with your mind this whole time to see what you're made of...LOL other than that, i'm a very pleasant woman. i love the smell of the fresh air including the smell of cigarette smoke in it.............hell, even if some maryjane was in the air, it still wouldn't bother me none. it's everyone's choice on how they want to live their lives.

i'm a down to earth city girl turned country, divorced twice, 1st time cuz my ex was caught with another woman and he stole off of me. i still love him and he's deceased now and my 2nd ex was just a plain and simple a$$whole that took me to the cleaners financially and since he couldn't get any more money off of me he decided to start spreading rumors that i was cheating on him (never did) and everyone believed him. i've been through the wringers with my fair share of a$$holes in my life but i still walk around with a smile on my face whether it be a smile made by my mouth or with my eyes. i still smile and joke around with everyone...................i still love ya, don't worry, you're cool
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 34
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 10/5/2006 7:43:39 PM
ok miss walking psa.........it's my life to do with as i please, if the area that i'm at is not posted then i'm going to smoke. if you're walking down the street and i have a cigarette in my hand, looks like you're going to walk on the other side of the street cuz i'm not moving for no one.

do me a really big favor............STOP THE PREACHING, IT'S NOT HELPING YOU FIND A MAN!!!

oh btw, they are 2 things that i will agree with you about but i'm still not going to quit smoking for you or anyone else. i will quit if and when i feel like it, not until then.
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 37
Absolute deal breaker
Posted: 10/6/2006 8:19:50 AM
thank you very much time with the lessons. now people might be able to see where i'm coming from when they keep bringing up the fact of lung cancer and such.

now peoples read up for what tim has posted and remember some of the things i was talking about...............
 thatArtsygal
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 39
view profile
History
Absolute deal breaker
Posted: 10/16/2006 4:52:35 PM
Dealbreaker for me...

I'm a big fan of the philosophy of 'each to their own' .. however, I also have a right to not spend my time with people who do things I don't care for. Smoking is extremly high on that list for me. I just hate the way it smells, and the nasty way it feels in my throat just to be in a smokey room. The thought of kissing a person who smells that way is enough to turn my stomach. Yes, more graphic than you asked for, I know. ;)

Besides - there's better things to spend my money on than smokes!

Jas
 Sheridan46
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 50
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/11/2007 9:45:06 AM
Ok ladies ...lets assume the guy was a multi millionaire and wanted to marry you...would you still dump him if he smoked?
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 51
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/11/2007 10:23:10 AM
Smoking is not a deal breaker
smoking crack is -
I smoke - if I did not smoke it still would not be a deal breaker-
I know - bad for your health - blah blah blah - No - there are worse
things he can do to me than break my heart and die of lung cancer-

Sheridan46 - yeah - a millionaire would be icing on the cake -
but again - I would take him if he was poor and smoked - If I love him-
I love him - period-

Ponygrl rocks-
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 56
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/11/2007 12:14:02 PM
kelly......to this day my boys are still healthier than ever. when my younger son was here over easter weekend and had on shorts and a muscle shirt i was like omfg! his father and i are both smokers.....he was born with the perfect v shaped body that many men would die to have and still does....for going on 13 that boy is built like a brick sh*thouse. he built up his body by snowboarding. my older son, his father and i both smoked as well and he also has a great body on him. i smoked cigarettes my entire pregancy and still smoke even around them. i'm not going to be a closet smoker for no one, not even my own boys.

sheridan.....what if a rich woman asked you about not smoking would you do it? i wouldn't give up my smoking for no man.....it has to be done soley because i would want to. even if i did quit which i'm not, i wouldn't want anyone to do something that they don't want to do either.

some men would rather not be around women that smoke but they inturn smoke as well. some men feel as if it's a complete turn off for a woman to smoke but it's fine for them to smoke.....nope, sorry, no way buster.....if you're going to smoke then i'm going to smoke as well, ain't no one gonna stop me.

lets take it slow........i smoke a pack a day and i walk about 3-5 miles every day and still have no problems....and i'm not talking about flatland either....i live up in the sticks with a lot of winding hills to climb.

52.......if i had a book i think only 2 people would buy it, that's you and myself. no one cares about what i have to say......all i can say is that i'm expressing my freedom of speech. curley would tell you, so would some others as well.....i'm open, honest, and right to the point. i try to keep my wording to a minimum but then again my words come out strong. i say how i feel, i tell it like it is.

now, is smoking a deal breaker for me.....like i've seen in here....smoking crack is indeed a deal breaker......smoking a joint? nahhhhh, that's definately far from being a deal breaker to me. who knows i might even take a hit as well...

but really people.........if someone wants to fire-up a bowl or joint, go right ahead, if they want to smoke crack, please don't do that in front of me but then again, i'd much rather see someone smoking crack as compared to shooting up or banging. it's everyone's perogative to do as they please, live their lives like they want. no one and i mean no one should ever try to force their prospective partner into doing anything that he or she wants to do. it's like me saying to some guy if you want sex then let me smoke....no smoking allowed, oh well don't touch me when you want to screw around. i would never put anyone on the spot like that so no one in their right mind should do that to others. take a person as they are not what they like to be.....don't try to mold a person into being a puppet while the other person is the puppetier (sp).

i'm no one's puppet....are you? would you let someone try to control your life?
 1Fish2Fish RedFishNewFish
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 58
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/18/2007 4:54:16 PM
Personal opinion: Smoking is a deal breaker. Not only is it (to me) quite gross , but why would I want to get involved with someone who has been increasing their odds, dramatically, of dying an awful death before her time? My dad died of lung cancer, so did my cousin. My sister just died from a brain tumor. I see no reason to "tempt fate."

I guess it doesn't help that my ex was a smoker who PROMISED to quit before I married her, then found an excuse not to every time I asked about it for a year, then told me she never said she would quit. There's a little (ok, a LOT ) of resentment there, but I learned a lesson - I am not going to change anyone. It's wrong of me to try. Consequently, I made it VERY clear in my profile that smokers "need not apply." I have no problem if you smoke - in your home. If you smoke outside, keep your butts in your car or in your pocket. You have the right to swing your fist.... right up to the tip of my nose...

Nope, **I** will find a non-smoker for sure...

YMMV
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 62
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/19/2007 3:17:10 PM
hmmm. i've been talking to a lot of people both men and women, smokers and non smokers...funny thing that i found out from someone i was talking to is that he's a non smoker, wouldn't think twice about dating a woman that smokes but it's perfectly fine for him to fire up a joint in front of his date that's completely against drugs of any kind. what they both told me was from her saying....omfg how dare he fire up a joint in front of me. sure i smoke cigarettes for quite a while now and i'm not ready to quit but i'm against smoking pot. i used to deal maryjane years ago but ever since i had my first kid and found myself getting into more trouble with my debt i stopped. my kid is more important than smoking or dealing pot. he said to me....wow, she must be really uptight with me for firing up a joint. i'm glad i got rid of her anyway since i don't like the smell of niccatine all over everything.

all they had to do was not smoke cigarettes or pot around each other....smoke their last cigarette or fire up their last joint before going out on a date and things would have been cool. she regrets not quitting smoking since she was so much in love with the guy but he wouldn't bend at all to keep her.....(he was in love with her too).

it's this way, if there are 2 wrongs in a relationship like that, what's so hard in not doing what each other is against to make things right? should everyone deny the chance on meeting their true love because of their choice in smoking? no they shouldn't because the person that's against smoking may have some serious problems as well....they tend to hide them in the closet until after the first date.

sorry but smoking isn't a deal breaker in my book.....what in fact is a deal breaker is someone that's not honest with others and hide things of importance away.
 LifeTraveling
Joined: 10/24/2006
Msg: 64
view profile
History
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 4/20/2007 8:11:47 PM
For me, it is. I'm sure there are plenty of smokers who are great guys. Can't date them. I have friends that smoke, although they're careful not to smoke around me, and I don't rub my views in their face, and that's why we're still friends. I realize it's an addictive habit, and hard to break, so I try not to be judgemental about it.
I have asthma, and smoke invariably sets off an episode for me. Kind of hard to get romantic with someone when I feel like I'm hacking up a lung.
Plus, I work in healthcare, and I've seen the effects of smoking. True, not everyone who smokes ends up with health problems, but the odds aren't that great, so why risk it?
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 80
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 6/27/2007 7:19:22 AM
dale.......if smoking causes low birthweight babies then what's my excuse? my older son weighed 8 lbs 1 1/4 ozs and my younger son weighed 8 lbs 12 ozs. both of my boys were around average weight at birth. my sister in law quit smoking during her pregnancy and both of my nephews weighed under 6lbs. i feel as if the weight of the baby is a variation brought upon the birthweight of the parents and cigarette smoking has no role. also, a good friend of mine from philly lost her baby at exactly 1 month old from sids...she didn't smoke the entire time of her pregnancy. sids is sudden infant death syndrom...there is no cause behind the death since there can be a variation of reasons so they're not able to pinpoint 1 problem...it just happens. imo.

if i'm with someone that doesn't smoke i would ask them if they mind if i smoke around them...some are cool with me smoking around them, some find it ignorant...but i have the common courtesy to ask the non smoker if they mind.
 ldytrkr
Joined: 6/3/2007
Msg: 91
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 3/24/2008 12:28:21 PM
Its not a deal breaker but I tend not to email nonsmokers out of respect for the fact that they dont smoke. I would not want to subject them to my second hand smoke if we ever did meet. On the other hand if they emailed me then I would not smoke around them if we did meet. I know its not good for me but I am not ready to quit yet, and may never be.
 * Magic Man *
Joined: 10/5/2006
Msg: 92
view profile
History
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 5/2/2008 2:29:57 PM
HELLO? ... it's gotten so bad that any POF individual can RESTRICT / BAN a smoker from even so much as dropping them a friendly note!

In a word ... 'apparently'
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 5/2/2008 9:09:08 PM
It's A No Deal Braker With Me -I stand firm on this !

I'm a none smoker - Yet I will not put down anyone that does this bad habit.
The smell of ciggy smoke makes me deathly ill and I will not kiss nor date a smoker .

Nor do I want his 2nd hand smoke in my face let alone my beautiful healthy lungs., this is my choice and well bars and public places in certain states allows this , I find it hard to go out and do anything cause of the smoking in places.

I will not kiss a human ashtray nor will I clean them it's a nasty habit and well it's not one of mine. If they smoke I sure as heck don't want it around me gum or mouth wash , sprays nothing takes that taste away!

I'M NOT KISSING NOR DATING A SMOKER THAT'S MY CHOICE

Brenny I'm out on this topic
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 5/3/2008 10:16:48 AM
As to my statement about kissing an human ashtry ~ it is not directed to female smokers ~ It's my prorogative that I don't date nor kiss smokers but I don't put anyone down for there bad habit either. When your child was born with lung problems and you've held her while they rattled it's awake up call , her and I both suffer from severe alergies and asphma , seen too many of my family and friends die from some form of Lung Cancer and I'm sorry that you took it personaly for that you have my apoligy but please know this was not directed towards any specific person, it's just my feelings on who I choose to date . Brenny
 lonesome wonderer
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 95
view profile
History
Is smoking a deal breaker?
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:02:20 AM
i'm gonna get hanged now.....can someone please pass me a cigarette and light it for me first?

okay, for all people that are non smokers, i have nothing against non smokers and will show common courtesy and not smoke in front of them in a restaurant, in their car, or in their home but i can tell you that i will smoke outside and away from the person that i'm with. if you choose not to kiss me because i'm a smoker than that's your choice, if you do then that's your choice as well. i'm not going to force anyone into doing something that they're not interested in just like i wouldn't expect them to force me into quitting smoking.

as for all of the smokers out there.......light up people and puff away before the country takes away our cigarette companies all together. wtf, they're taking everything away from us but still want us to vote for them.....if they keep their bs up i'm going to say to hell with the government and tell them to kiss my a$$ if they want my vote!
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