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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Well, you be the judge--warning.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 *mandrake*
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 2
Well, you be the judge--warning.Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Sounds like "Pete Rose" is at it again. Hey, maybe he is lobbying to get into the Hall of Fame again.!!
 belly18dancer
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 6
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/28/2006 8:12:11 AM
thanks for the warnings...although i have a pay as you go phone...and i'm not married or seeing anyone...just don't use a cell phone all that much and an ex bought it for me for when i was driving down to his house four hours away....

and yeah i notice people will post a very young photo as the main one and u think...wow, hot hot hot, then u see their other photos and it's like...oh that's an old one, here is what they look like now...not so hot...i met a guy like that, and i didn't recognize him either, he surprised me at one of our football games...i had worked all day and gone straight to game, no make up, hair a mess, and busy with my cheerleaders, he got upset that i didn't recognize him, how could i when his photos were OLD....then he actually raked me across the coals in his profile saying, I took glamour shots (i do my own photogrpahy, and yeah i am good) and that i was fat and ugly in person)....he didn't mention my name so the site wouldn't make him take his crap down...by the way...he's on POF too...he has several OLD photos where he is hunky and one newer one...where he has the belly of a whale...which is what he looks like now....but yet had the nerve to say i was fat...at least my photos are all recent..and I state that i'm not thin in my profile....

sorry to ramble but more warnings about fakes on this site are awlways welcome
 Buh-Bye!
Joined: 10/21/2006
Msg: 7
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/28/2006 10:39:22 AM
You are 59 and a psychologist?!

You aren't too bright for your age or former job.


Wake up, you need to be responsible and protect yourself. This is just crazy.
You are knowingly putting yourself in danger and then complaining about it.
 Buh-Bye!
Joined: 10/21/2006
Msg: 8
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/28/2006 10:43:22 AM

Bennigans, another restaurant.
Yeah, THAT'S a classy CEO!


I also stayed because I figured that he may as well buy my dinner, he owed me that one. I was thinking of ordering my dinner, a really good steak, getting a doggie bag and leaving as soon as I got there, would have served him right,


That's really crappy of you, and you give women a bad name. Thinking that is just wrong. Grow up. You weren't owed anything, other than to use your BRAIN to start with.
We don't need 'help' like that from your type!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 10
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/28/2006 1:53:17 PM
It's an epidemic. The main reason I refuse to meet someone before I have spent a lot of email time, phone time, webcam time and time getting to know him, his schedule, his routine, etc. This is a link to one of about 50 sites I discovered that are specifically designed to educate people to the signs of dishonesty, cheating, etc. Although it is geared towards men, I think it pertains to both genders as both genders can be online players.

http://www.angelfire.com/journal/fighting/soapbox.html

WARNING SIGNS HE MAY BE "TAKEN"

1. He says he doesn't like chat rooms ... due to "There's always disruptive teens in chat rooms", "Can't keep up with all the chat on the screen", "it's more personal to talk by IMs," etc. The REAL reason may be: he has a wife / live-in lover who may "pop" into the room. OR, he may be stringing along more than just you and they might happen into the room and blow it for him ... this results in a "cat fight" in the room.
2. You're chatting by IMs and he's suddenly slow to answer He may be shrinking / minamizing the IM screen when the wife/girlfriend/kids/grandkids walk into the room. Kids are very good at "telling Mommy / Grandma".
3. He often asks you to resend your pic, that AOL "ate" his favs or etc. He may be deleting it so his wife / live-in lover doesn't run across it when she's using the computer.
4. His phone number is always either busy or no one answers He may have a separate phone line for his computer and gave you that number instead when you insisted on having his number. He may not want you to have his main number because "someone else" may answer.
5. The marital status on his profile is left blank He may have a wife/live-in lover and this way he can "verbally" pass himself off as being unattached.
6. His profile states: "Already taken" "My heart has already been won" etc. That may be to pacify the wife/live-in lover AND/OR to fool all the "fillies in his stable", each one thinking that it means "HER". Insist that your name be added to his declaration of "not available".
7.He made a screen name "just for you" Aw, how sweet. OR is it to hide online from the wife or other online girlfriend(s), so he won't be interrupted by them while he's busy doing a number on you.
8.His best friend, brother, son or mother emails/IMs you verifying that he is divorced and what a real b*tch his wife was. It could be HIM using another name. At the same time he may "plug" himself, saying: what a great guy he is and how much he loves you, etc. There is NO LIMIT to the deviousness of players. TIP: watch for the same words he commonly misspells, same phrases/expressions/speech patterns, same font&font size&color, or same typing style -- no caps or all caps, or no punctuation, or a lot of dashes, or a lot of ....'s, etc.
9.You're talking on the phone and hear kids in the background He may say it's the TV or it's the neighborhood kids playing outside. He may have called while the wife is out shopping, at Bingo or her bridge game, etc. and those ARE his kids. OR he may tell you he has custody of his kids due to his wife was an unfit mother, or an alcoholic, etc., OR that the ex or Grandmother lives just around the corner and the kids drop in at his place often.
10.He has you to call him only at a specific time For example, he tells you to call after 9 o'clock because the kids (whom he has custody of) or visiting grandkids are in bed then. OR is it, the wife/live-in lover is at her job then.
11. You're chatting and he suddenly signs off If this happens often, he may be signing off every time the wife/live-in lover/kids walk into the room and then tells you he got booted, or had a power failure, etc.
12. He'll only give you a cell number or work number but never a home number. Chances are: he's married or living with someone.
13. He always uses a calling card Could it be because he doesn't want your number to show up on the phone bill?
14. He only calls during work hours He may be using only the company phone ... because there's a wife/live-in lover at home.
15. He doesn't let you call Gives you the chivalrous line that he doesn't want you paying for the long distance calls. Or is it, he may not want to chance "someone else" answering.
16. If you call at an unexpected time does he speak in a low voice as if he doesn't want to be overheard, or is irritated that you called without notice, or says "now is not a good time to call", etc?
 JWA
Joined: 5/21/2005
Msg: 12
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 4:49:17 AM
What is or was the purpose of this post anyway? You can't and didn't name this guy so what help is this? You've supposedly exposed SOMEONE who might be a pretender or bullshyter----is this new? So now you're advising all of Los Angeles to be on the lookout or at least aware there MIGHT be someone who doesn't tell the truth on their way to visit?

Honestly my dear there were a lot of red flags about this guy well before you even laid eyes on him! Why you hung around as long as you did also escapes me. I don't get it---women complalin about bad dates but yet they stick around long enough to have a great story.

The very reason for this post totally escapes me!!
 ponygrlâ„¢
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 15
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 5:15:37 PM
op, i may have done the same thing as you did just out of curiousity. i'm just glad to hear that you didn't follow him. as for him playing baseball, yeah he played baseball alright.....sounds like his way of playing baseball is with his own bat and his 2 little balls...........i'm going to be nice with the ceo part so i'm going to change one of the original vowels of the word that best describes him with a different vowel..............c.e.o = chief executive osshole. (by the way, my mom always called my ex husband an osshole which was her pollite way of calling him an a$$hole)
 PlaynWithDummies
Joined: 9/18/2006
Msg: 16
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 5:34:49 PM

Doubt he is a CEO of anything but himself.....a CEO rarely will open up on his perks and salary...the more powerful the CEO, the quieter they are on their holdings and wealth and what boards they sit on. The people who flash this crap arent real....ask about his investment cycles or his hobbies....that will give serious clues to real or bull.


EXACTLY!!!!!! ^^^ Just what he said.
 PlaynWithDummies
Joined: 9/18/2006
Msg: 17
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 5:43:27 PM

When I called the phone it said that this was a prepaid number and could not be accessed. That is how I knew.


HUH????

I have two cell phones, one is prepaid, and the other is regular. Never once when I call my kids on the prepaid cell do I ever get that message.

I also have several friends who only use prepaid, and I have never got that message.
 Rabbitman49
Joined: 10/20/2005
Msg: 18
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 8:04:54 PM
To classandmor: After you ditched him and went home, did he call and ask if you got lost? I think that you would have said so if that happened, but that's your answer right there.... That player found someone else to play with that night.
 demgirl76
Joined: 10/12/2006
Msg: 19
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 10/29/2006 10:58:37 PM
People who are saying, "You could you be so stupid!?" or whatever to the OP are missing the point... the reason she started this thread is that she did miss what she only later saw as red flags, and I think she was hoping that if anyone knew someone who was feeding them similar details as "her" creep was should beware. And - unfortunately - I don't think we're ever too old or smart to act unwisely.
 neillowe
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 21
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History
Well, you be the judge--warning.
Posted: 12/24/2006 6:36:59 AM
(for message #27) ...as far as #1 goes - on the other hand it may be because it's too hard to keep up or there's too many disruptive people in there. I'm single and that's the excuse I use because for me it happens to be the truth.

...other than your webcam strategy I don't see how emails, IMs etc are really going to tell you much about the person because of reasons #2-#16.

I'd much rather meet tete-a-tete sooner than later because nothing beats the 3-D experience for sussing out all these concerns you mentioned. You get the words and body language and most people are astute enough to feel some kind of gut reaction to this and then go with their intuition. That's just me though.

Finally, although it may be more pervasive among men on an internet dating site (and honestly I wouldn't personally make that kind of statement without some statistics) it's not like women are immune to some disingenuous behaviors either.
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