Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 RweTObe
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 1
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY???
Baffled and bewildered! I have had this reoccurring relationship with women as far back as I can remember. I am always attracted to girls that are not attracted to me. Is it possible that I am hardwired in such a way that I am attracted to women that are to pretty for me. I have tried dating women that I find less physically attractive only to end in disaster. I recently posted a picture of me on one of those rate me sights, my score averages from 6.2 to 7 with a grand total of 600 votes. The ladies that I found physically attractive were 8.5 to 10. I feel like I have no choice in this and it's making me crazy. I not sure if I look forward to the feedback or not but, I'm asking anyway.
 psssst
Joined: 2/8/2006
Msg: 2
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/12/2006 12:41:58 PM
How wonderfully superficial... why don't you look at who the person is inside rather than the exterior packaging...
 athletic2222
Joined: 10/13/2006
Msg: 3
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/12/2006 12:45:36 PM
The simple answer is because you are human.

We are all attracted to people who are more attractive than ourselves. Using the same logic people less attractive than us will be attracted to us. Leaving the whole world single, if looks were the only thing that mattered.

The best matches are when you meet someone whom is OK looking and after you talk to them suddenly they are beautiful in your eyes. Hard to find.

Good luck.
 KiteGuy321
Joined: 3/21/2006
Msg: 4
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/12/2006 5:26:44 PM
10's date 10's, 7's date 7's, etc. etc.

You can either date down or even, if you wait until you find a 10 that willing to date down, its quite possible that you'll stay single forever.

boy, does that sound cynical...
 Irish Eyez
Joined: 7/2/2006
Msg: 5
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/12/2006 5:43:47 PM
OP:

Damned if I know why anyone gives credit re: votes and pics.

It's there for entertainment value.

Don't get too caught up with it. There's so much more to a woman than a pretty face.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 6
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/13/2006 12:00:31 PM
Somewhere there is a thread where a woman is asking the same question about guys she's hot for not being into her.

There is like a 20% chance that you and another person will either be mutually attracted to or not at all attracted to each other. There is an 80% chance that you will meet someone and the attraction will be one sided (for everyone who is planning on asking where I got my numbers, don't bother - it's just a guess). Anyhow, it's just the way life goes.

Eventually someone you are into will be into you as well. But you gotta go thru a few of the 80% first, because there are just more of them.

Now once you and that person find each other, you have to be sure there is some sort of decent interaction between the two of you, that there isn't any competition, and that your interests are common and any relationship that develops is honest from both sides. If not, you have to start all over again.

Now does it make sense? It's a wonder we ever find anyone, eh?

And yeah I agree that the rating section of this site isn't supposed to be seriously taken. It's just something to do when people are bored.
 Yahh ROO Giddy Up
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 7
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/13/2006 12:54:19 PM
welcome to my world --- your not the only one in fact it happens to many people both men and women - but I admire anyone able to admit it


everybody and I mean everybody would like to "trade up" so to speak

and dont wory about the picture rateing either -- its all subjective

If it makes you feel better I rated a 4.3 after about 700 votes on the other website whatever it was called - rate my pic or something

its all a numbers game - that 20 % that was mentioned by old school queen
 RweTObe
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 8
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 2:05:21 PM
Thanks everybody.

It's kinda funny but everybody made sense.
 OpheliaBonMot
Joined: 8/12/2006
Msg: 9
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 2:15:38 PM
Perhaps you're very deeply insecure and find women who reject you much more fascinating than those who would actually accept and like you.

In other words, you'd never belong to a club that would have someone like you as a member.
 RweTObe
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 10
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 2:47:07 PM
OpheliaBonBon ,

I can see how that could be a factor. Has this been a personal experience of your own, do you feel this way.

I have quite a few friends, some in which I am very close to. I think that if this was a factor I would have this issue with them but I don't. In fact some of these very good friends look up to me and believe in me. I believe in me. I like me and enjoy my own company.
 aventurero
Joined: 4/17/2005
Msg: 11
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 3:17:52 PM
Go for women you find reasonably attractive but not necessarily hot, then let their personality and warmth dazzle you.
 OpheliaBonMot
Joined: 8/12/2006
Msg: 12
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 3:25:47 PM

Has this been a personal experience of your own, do you feel this way.

Nope, I think I'm pretty realistic about my good and bad qualities. But I counsel a lot of people, both men and women, who sabotage themselves in many different ways when it comes to relationships.

One of them is to always long for the unattainable one. The common fantasy of falling in love with a priest is but one example of this phenomenon.
 mheath4
Joined: 7/9/2006
Msg: 13
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 3:43:54 PM

How wonderfully superficial... why don't you look at who the person is inside rather than the exterior packaging...


Because when the hottie accross the room is sending you signals, you're probably not thinking "man i bet he's got a great personality."
 Jarbarian
Joined: 2/9/2006
Msg: 14
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 4:07:16 PM

Because when the hottie accross the room is sending you signals, you're probably not thinking "man i bet he's got a great personality."


...and that's exactly why so many people end up in miserable/failed relationships. They're too busy listening to LUST instead of their BRAINS....
 Metaphysicalman
Joined: 7/5/2006
Msg: 15
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/14/2006 5:22:59 PM
I get the impression that this really is one of the failings
of the Internet, when it comes to dating. The physical
components are absent. EYE CONTACT, body language,
appropriately timed smiles, smell. All these things are
missing, and more!

I bet, so many people have dismissed another on the
Internet that would have been good fits, and others
that have gotten together that were incompatible!

I have seen pictures of a women, that I thought was
very attractive, and then the second picture turned
me right off, and I went to the next profile.

That's Internet dating!

Or you find they smoke and discount them. But if you
were smitten by them in real life, you might have put
up with that failing!

So, in answer to your question. It really is a more
challenging prospect, to find someone on the internet.
And as mentioned by others, it is a numbers game and
I guess both sexes will not only be frequently disappointed,
but also frequently disappoint. One has to have a thick
skin, that's for sure!
 crazychristy266
Joined: 6/9/2006
Msg: 16
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/15/2006 11:21:39 PM
i have the same problem. i find that most older men are more attracted to me why i dont know!
 Colonel Hapablat
Joined: 11/5/2006
Msg: 17
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/15/2006 11:27:57 PM
This true for both sexes... Women are just as bad for this as boys are. Get drunk, drop your expectations and morals, pick up them beer goggles and go for something unfortunate!!
 RweTObe
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 18
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/18/2006 9:06:30 AM
Thanks again everybody.
 someotherdude
Joined: 7/6/2005
Msg: 19
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/18/2006 1:29:32 PM
Pretend that you are rich.

Women are extremely superficial. The only thing that really matters is how much money you have.

They will deny it, but in the end, that is their only concern.

Can this man take care of me.

 o5iri5
Joined: 9/28/2005
Msg: 20
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:49:49 PM
The solution is to stop caring!

Why even give them their own train of thought? American women have physical prowess but very few have anything else to offer. She is a product of a society that gives her victim status yet gives her innumerable advantages over men in all realms of life. What if 85% of homeless people were women? What if virtually all women were sexually mutilated shortly after birth? What if divorce courts were almost always on the side of men no matter how unfaithful he was? What if you could get special grants from the government to start a business simply because you are a man? What if 1/3 of men who married high and then killed their wives just to take their money actually got away with it legally? What if it was OK to publicly trash women in TV talk shows, commercials and movies but an unholy sin to trash men?

In America today, the man has to be the hunter and the nurturer. Before going overseas to find a real women, you should become cold and self-righteous towards the women here! Why care about her heart? Give back what she gives to you!
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 21
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:27:16 PM

10's date 10's, 7's date 7's, etc. etc.

You can either date down or even, if you wait until you find a 10 that willing to date down, its quite possible that you'll stay single forever.

Basically, I agree if dating leads to marriage. For sex, guys will date down while women will only date even or up. A 9 guy will have sex with a 7 girl since sevens are pretty enough to be sexy; however, he would not marry her. Don't hold your breath for girl that is a 9 to date a guy that is a 7.
 Leeanne
Joined: 10/14/2005
Msg: 22
view profile
History
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:31:16 PM
Simply date the person you get along with - for personality and compatibility - the package is to superficial and shallow!!! Your dating experiences will be much more enjoyable and succesful if you allow yourself to open to the people who simply communicate freely and easily with you - not the one who is tied up in pretty bows!!
 Yahh ROO Giddy Up
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 23
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:31:30 PM
Hmmm Smilje

I was a 5 ( now 5.8734567) and was in a LTR with a 8/9

but let me guess - there are rare exceptions right

I think 05iri5 has the right idea


Before going overseas to find a real women


Europe here I come ---
 angelab
Joined: 2/16/2006
Msg: 24
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:37:24 PM
I thought only high school kids thought about themselves as numbers and really went on and on about that kind of crap.

I think EVERYONE has the problem of people they like not liking them, and people they wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole being all over them. That's just life. Go on 100 dates with 100 different people, and you'll be lucky to find 10 people that you seem to click with. Then you'll probably be lucky to have 2 or 3 of those that you find attractive.
 Yahh ROO Giddy Up
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 25
The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:38:32 PM
sounds like a numbers game from you Angel - yet numbers are crap right

yah just pulling your leg angel

sometimes i think it would be easier to be blind
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > The girls I'm attracted to are not attracted to me....WHY?!?!