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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??      Home login  
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 Jroch914
Joined: 3/28/2005
Msg: 10
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I think it depends... I married when my daughter was 7 yrs old. She adored my (ex)wife. We had her involved in house wedding, and I also asked her permission to marry my (ex)wife. If there was an issue, I would have discussed it w/her.

That night, daughter asked if it was okay to call ex, mom. I told her it was okay, as long as she understands that (real) mom is her mom. She never did call ex, mom.

How does he speak of you and her in a discussion? Referring to mom and step-'mom', is he confused about it, or understanding of relationship?
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 11
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He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/6/2005 6:17:22 AM
No, it's not ok. And I think it's that simple.
 SweetShaker
Joined: 7/2/2004
Msg: 12
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He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/6/2005 6:35:46 AM
My son started calling my husband Dad on his own.
My husband is ALWAYS there for him, and is an AMAZING father.
His dad... well kinda wishy washy... shows up when he feels like it, and right now is dating a woman who just doesn't like my son.
When he was quite young, we explained to him that my husband is his step dad (oh his 'real' dad was there for this discussion.. he was playing good Daddy that day) and his 'real' dad was his Dad. He refers to my husband as Daddy Rob, and this has been comfortable for all of us.

It think it's different in every situation, and I think it's important to go with what the child is comfortable with. But, I do believe, that as long as they are being treated well, a child should be taught to respect and care about their step parents. I did not encourage my son to call my husband Daddy, but oddly enough his 'real' father did.
 Pandy
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 26
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/12/2005 6:35:47 AM
guy with a cigar, hard to see that they have the right morals


Hey, don't question my morals. You assist in raising a 6 year old, that's nice. My kids in high school and doing great.
This has nothing to do with morals, just hurt feelings.


I think you've hit the nail on the head there, Stubob.......and I cAn't really belive that a 5 or so yr old would care enough about an issue like this to be uncomfortable with it. That wasn't included in the OP when this thread was started elsewhere. What it all boils down to is what you've already heard....whether you like it or not, there's not really anything you can do about it without hurting your son.

Oh, and if she has been your child's stepmother for five years she's HARDLY the
"new woman" that you stated in your thread title. Overdramatization never helps any situation like this.
 Pandy
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 29
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/18/2005 8:33:39 PM

No woman can replace the love I have with my two kids...and my monkeys have enough love to go around. My daughter told me a while ago she wanted me to marry so she could get an extra daddy.


Kudos , Paradoxx, love your attitude.
 north9
Joined: 2/19/2005
Msg: 35
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/27/2005 7:12:20 PM
Samhonolulu said

this thread hits close to home. My ex recently took up with a new guy, got married, and has our daughters half-sisters pressuring her into calling the new 'victim' dad! Made me want to jump out of my skin! Meanwhile, i was unable to see my daughter due to a b.s. TRO filing! I finally got full custody of my daughter, and she still mentions him as her 'other dad'. How do you explain to a 4 (now 5) year old all this mess?
I've been trying to explain to her the difference between a mother and a mom, and a father and a dad. Seems beyond her grasp - she goes off on the details asking more and more...maybe it's just me!!!


The truth is that a child as early as five (5) can easily be convinced. There was a show actually in 60 minutes. The showed a child a snake inside a fish tank glass. Unbeknown to the child some hiding behind the glass was speaking to the child. The child did believe that the snake was able to speak in human language, in this case English. Later someone else was telling the child that snakes do not speak like humans, the child insisted that the snake was speaking. So my suggestion to you is to read child psychology based books and see what you can come up with. If that does not work. See a consult a child psychologist.
 Taurusq
Joined: 10/8/2004
Msg: 36
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He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 4/28/2005 10:40:54 AM
bounjour you need to put your foot down on that one. it is not ok for your son to be calling someone else mom. you earned that tittle you gave birth to that child and he will only have one mother in his live time step moms can come and go but you and your sone have blood bond. if i ever found out that my duaghter was calling another man daddys i ... well let me tell you there aren't enough four letter words in the english language for me to express how that would make me feel. that child has one mothr and one father and its up to you to make sure that he knows the differance between mom and some slut dad picked up at a bar.
 honeyspice01
Joined: 5/1/2005
Msg: 50
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 5/5/2005 9:35:11 PM
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!! He's a jerk and obviously is going to confuse your child. Tell him to grow up and just let it go when your child says things like that. It will stop happening over time.
 100%me
Joined: 5/1/2005
Msg: 61
He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 6/5/2005 7:43:31 PM
Hell no it's not o.k !!!!!!!!!!
Who gave birth to this child? YOU DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Until this child is old enough to comprehend what STEP-mother means, i think the OTHER woman should be called either by her own name or maybe an affectionate name.

A child only has 1 mother

I have been in long term relationships with single dads and never would allow myself to be thought as '' mommy ''

sorry if this offends people whom are in this predicament.... but that is just the way it is
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 68
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He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 3/12/2008 5:56:48 AM
I'm lucky my sons dad has never tried any stunts like that. I would really NOT be okay with that either and would probably have a really good sit down talk with the dad and her too over that type of issue.
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 69
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He has my child calling the new woman mom...is it ok??
Posted: 3/12/2008 5:58:55 AM
Tell him over and over what a biological mother is and the importance of that.
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