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 AUTHOR
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 9
Our aging bodiesPage 1 of 20    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20)
...I was told, if you take off all your clothes, take a good long look in the mirror,...if you don't like what you see, how do you expect some else to? My response....get a second opinion.



...maeflowers
 Avalon96
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 12
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 4:44:22 AM
If we are over 45 and seeking physical perfection in a partner,
we may be in for a long lonely life, most of us are not even
perfect when we are young. Sure it's nice to find someone who has
aged well, and active folks will want want a partner who can keep up.
For me the main thing, is to find out whether the wrinkles came from
smiling or frowning.
 AgelessWonder
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 13
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 5:04:55 AM
Of course our bodies age unless we are a movie star and have face lifts, boob lifts, tummy tucks and lift anything else that sags. Even the movie stars who have had them, show signs of aging. I didn't get to be this age wihout it. As avalon said, nobody was perfect when young, I know I wasn't and never will be. But I am me, and I think I'm pretty hot.
 SoTexMan
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 14
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 5:16:28 AM
Hey, all:

This is an interesting important topic, and one I have trouble with. At 58, I can easily keep up with and whip people 10-15 years younger, and in many cases, 40 years younger. I eat well, rest well, work hard, play hard, work out, practice Yoga, and have a family history of very good health and longevity, going back 4 generations that I can remember off the top of my head--and some of their health and longevity was before the advent of modern medicine.

I have to draw a distinction between 'forgiving' and 'wanting'. I can forgive anyone their shape and health, but not want to be intimate with them. I personally think there is very little real reason, outside of severe medical problems, why a person cannot be relatively fit. A lot of it has to do with pride and self esteem. I say 'relatively fit' to distinguish between a marathoner and someone who can climb a flight of stairs or go on a brisk walk. That is really not a very high standard to reach. The reality is that on average we are too fat, unhealthy, and sedentary.

I have been in a relationship off and on for 2 years with a lovely beautiful woman (currently off, and for the last year, due to individual issues we both have). She is 53 and although she is in great shape (she lifts weights, runs, and does Yoga), her breasts have sagged a lot, which matters NOTHING at all to me, since they still worked for both of us--quite well I must add. She was also once overweight, due to a severe viral illness and long convalescence, and time and weight loss and gravity have all done the rest.

If I was fat, pasty-faced, out of shape, and had a collection of stained undershirts as my wardrobe, I might be more forgiving, but I wouldn't call attention to myself and answer the question. So the sample you have to work with is skewed, to use a statistical term. It does not represent the full population, so we should not be surprised.

Yes, we are getting older. This does not mean we have to lie down and wait to die while making excuses. Improved lifestyle, eating habits, supplements, sleep habits, exercise, and meditation all can add greatly to the quality and quantity of our lives. Whether we have the genes or not. Changing your lifestyle can add better health and many years to your life without any constraints to your enjoyment of life, and in fact will improve it, and remove constraints.

I am sorry for hurting anyone's feelings, but as an older population and an older community, we sometimes need some stern talk. Call me your Dutch uncle, or worse if you wish.

David


Messages done with sustainable energy, with Wind and Sun!
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 17
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 6:54:22 AM
I can say the only thing that bothers me is a fat head.
It's very hard to do anything about a fat head. People with fat heads think they are always right.
Exercise and diet can help the 'beer gut' and thunder thighs but do nothing for a fat head.
People with fat heads usually get angry and defensive if you try to show them their own fat head and can spew all kinds of justifications for putting the blame on the person trying to show them a mirror.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18
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our ageing bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 8:15:21 AM
Unless you prefer something totally different, and many have that desire, I say it is best to look for what you offer.....

There is not a reason to let yourself go, and many of us that are more mature can do as much as we did 15 or 20 years ago..... We might not be able to do it as often, but still can do it when needed in many areas.....smiles

Age will come, but there is no reason to let it take control of you and just give in........proper diet, exercise, healthy activities, and a deep inner respect for your own body can all help slow down that process and help you to feel vital and active....

Just my opinion.....
 SoTexMan
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 23
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 11:12:11 AM
Hey, all:

Okay, "waiting my turn to talk", I would like to draw another distinction, between "age" and "aging".

"Age" cannot be helped--it is a simple additive, chronological event we cain't stop. We can however, do something about "aging", and not the cosmetics, and cosmetic surgery that is so popular.

A big element of "aging" is poor health practices, neglect, and ignorance. Ignorance is reinforced by myths and marketing. We can change all of these, and greatly slow the process of "aging". These are the things I mentioned above, and are available to anyone, with little cost and with only a modest amount of effort. Improving our lifestyles can be fun, and it actually removes many of the constraints we suffer under. Our overall health improves--period.

I like what Jeb said just above here. If you are at least moderately proud of your health and the way you look and feel, you project that to others who have the same feeling and you attract each other. That feeling can actually be synergistic and benefit you both.

Start eating more uncooked plant products, fruits, vegetables, grains, greens, stay the H e l l from processed foods--they are poison wrapped in fancy boxes, start reading labels, lose the trans-fat and hydrogenated oils, take a daily multi-vitamin supplement, get lots of omega-3 and -6 fatty acids, stay away from fast food joints, go to bed earlier, pour out your white flour and your white sugar, get up earlier, stop smoking, eat yogurt, non-fat dairy, use honey as a sweetener, exercise by lifting weights alternating days with aerobics such as walking, running, biking, swimming, slowly eat 4-6 small meals a day, git up off yer b ut t.

Don't try to do everything at once or you will burn out. Start out slow. Have fun. If you perceive it as work you are more to quit. 'Walk before you run' applies, literally and figuratively. It does not need to cost you anything more to do it so much better. No fancy programs, no expensive equipment, no big fees, no fancy chichi outfits to buy to look like you 'belong', no one looking at you and saying 'oh, look at the newbie! ewwwww'.

All it takes is knowledge, determination, and time. The result is something you can be very very proud of, because YOU did it.

David


Messages done with sustainable energy, with Wind and Sun!
 AgelessWonder
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 24
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 12:12:46 PM

This is very disheartening. I know my non-existent profile says bbw but only because short and fat was not an option. The thing is, this hasn’t been a big deal for me. For my life, I’ve been as attractive as I have needed to be. I have been very proud of my health, my strength, the way people respond to me. Unfortunately, after turning 40, I have developed a Sex Drive. Note the capital letters. And, I could not pass a pencil test. Though I could pass a pencil factory test. My stomach, I’m afraid to say, sits on my lap like a Pekinese. Well, not a Pekinese, but there is some contact there. The thing is, for myself, I don’t really care that I am so overweight. I am not, nor have I ever been concerned about my looks. I like myself quite a bit. I enjoy myself enormously. (No pun intended) Like I said, I’m as attractive as I need to be. Or so I thought. Now, from lurking about these forums, am I to deduce that if I want to get involved in a relationship (which I will need in order to feed the Hunger) I will actually need to lose the fat? (Which I know is possible but will involve long hours of torturous, super sucky, aerobic excersize which I really, really hate.) Of course, then I will be left with reams of sagging unfat-filled skin hanging all over the place. Wow. I sound soooo hot!


You are young! If you want to lose the weight, do it now, but do it for yourself, not to please anyone else. It is more healthy for you, but the decision needs to be yours. If you exercise you shouldn't have a lot of sagging skin.. well I don't know for sure, but I would think at your age, it would work, if you exercise while you are losing. A lot of people gain weight after a certain age, and it gets harder and harder to take the pounds off. But, it can be done, it just takes longer.
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 25
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 1:53:26 PM
Definately have to add some exercise to your daily routing to keep going. i started hiking, running, rollerblading on a daily basis. -feel great and helps me to pull those all nighters when friends want to stay out all night dancing, drinking and those unexpected road trips to Vegas...
 1classygal
Joined: 7/27/2006
Msg: 28
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/26/2007 3:50:59 PM
I prefer someone who looks after themselves. They do not have to have zero body fat or nice clean athletic lines but a zest for life is important and the ability to do things. If they do not respect their own body, know it is important to excercise, eat right ect, ect then I think they are not thinking about the future. I hope to be vital and active for a very long time and I desire someone who thinks the same way I do.
I love shaved heads, killer smiles and a sense of humour, all which should not diminish with time.
 afred549
Joined: 11/22/2006
Msg: 38
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/27/2007 3:48:32 AM
Though the subject is our aging bodies, we have turned this into more of a health forum for the overweight. I remain active, go to the gym at least 5-6 days per week. I'll never qualify as an Atlas, but I can do 30 minutes on the elliptical without breathing hard, then follow with light machine weights. I see a smorgasboard of people (especially in January with all the new faces that have resolutions and will disappear by mid February) but have to say that the ladies that would fit into my age group (I'm 57) that come there regularly get an added benefit from their visits, which is mental sharpness. Mental sharpness means a lot more to be than the toned kewpy doll that needs a sheet of paper to figure out 2 plus 2.

As active as I am, I do have areas that are part of the aging process and gives me limitations. I have had 2 back surgeries that were not really successfull. I have lost sensation in parts of my legs and have to be very careful about any activity that has impact in it. I can walk around all day, but even walking can cause some back pain, so hiking and biking are not things I do. After the last surgery, I experienced a pretty significant weight gain, mostly because I could not work out like I always had. I was limited to swimming, and simply ate more than I should have. I've since lost most of it, but I'm still about 15 pounds away from where I need to be. There is a paunch.

Last night, I went to the grocery store to get my food for the week. Since becoming single, I have made this as entertaining as I can, and like to watch other people and see what they are buying. Last night I saw a lady, may have been my age, but she was a bit large to say the least. If she had to haul butt it would have probably taken 2 trips. I checked out behind her...she had 4 extra large bags of chips, at least 4 2 liter bottles of Classic Coke, piles of bacon, whole milk...I could never go out with someone like that, because she obviuosly did not care. By the way, she had lovely nails....what's that all about? "Excuse me lady....those nails are hot! What say you and I go down to the tavern and have a few beers together?"

Be that as it may, the wrinkles, the sags, the hair and all the things to do with age mean little to me...as long as there is indications that the person genuinely cares about themselves.

Having said all that....I still love my beer.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 44
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/27/2007 2:23:56 PM
What is the equiviliant of the pencil test for men?

My body is in fairly good shape. Same weight as in high school. High energy levels put out as many calaries as my body wants to take in. However, I fail the pencil test, no matter how much CoQ10 I take.
 afred549
Joined: 11/22/2006
Msg: 47
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/27/2007 3:54:20 PM
Hate to sound dumb...what is the pencil test?
 tinkerbellcgy
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 48
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Posted: 1/27/2007 4:20:48 PM
As each day goes by, I age a little more. No matter how hard I try to stop aging, it just happens irregardless of what I do. How come?

The pencil test for aging bodies: is it necessary to have the pencil sharpened or can an unsharpened pencil be used?

Tink
 SoTexMan
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 51
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/27/2007 5:31:51 PM
Hey, all:

Ah, yes, Realist, thank you, like I said, as long as woman's breasts are distinguishable from the rest of her, i.e., she has enough pride and self esteem to try and maintain some weight control (yeah, I have no point of reference for myself), we'll be fine. And, uh, this pencil test needs to be "graded on a curve" for age anyway. I mean, I can't pass the pencil test!! Keep droppin' them things all ovah da place!

Moraima mentioned CoQ10 which made me realize I left antioxidants out of my list of things we can do to help ourselves be healthier. Thanks, Moraima.

We are finding more and more that all the antioxidants are EXTREMELY important, especially as we age, since we produce less of them as we age. And if we eat processed foods, we are being robbed of them. Lack of antioxidants cause breakdowns EVERYwhere in the body on EVERY level. OKAY, THIS IS WHERE I GET PISSY NOW.... Remember when your Mother said "Eat your vegetables."? THIS IS WHY!!!! Plant products of many many many kinds have a huge array of these things just waitin' to be eaten! So, EAT YOUR VEGETABLES!!

Antioxidants can also be taken as supplements. Vit. A, C, E, Selenium, lutein, Zinc, zeaxanthine, omega-3 and -6, and several others are highly recommended, by nutritionists, doctors, you name it. This is not a substitute for not eating your vegetables, though, since there are many others in plants not present in supplements.

I am sorry many have medical conditions which make it difficult to maintain their health. Persistence and educating yourself beyond what the doctor tells you is vital. They are in bidness to make money, no matter what you have heard. Some are better than others, some more conscientious than others, but it is a bidness!

Persistence, pride, and self esteem are signs of character, so witnessing these is more important than a whole host of other things. Like someone here said, standing in the checkout line with bags of chips and cases of soft drinks, with a shape that looks like a huge sack of puppies trying to get out, but with fancy fingernails or other superficial nonsense, is a prime example of missing the point.

I can't speak for all men, even maybe not a majority, but give me a plain, slender/average, healthy, confident woman instead of, well, the other. It has to do with substance. Yes, I know there are exceptions to this, but by and large, this is the guide. I expect to be around for a long time: I want someone who will be, too.

Oh, and if men would take better care of THEMSELVES, things like this ED (eeeewwwwww, by the way) would have a much much lower incidence. I WILL NOT make excuses for the rest of them.

It is not an absolute rule, but Health Fights Aging.

David


Messages done with sustainable energy, with Wind and Sun!
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 52
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/27/2007 5:59:50 PM
Eating our veggies become more and more important as we age. I love veggies, and my body naturally wants veggies, and doesn't want junk food. Lucky me.

However, us folks from the Great White North have problems getting decent vegetables. Winter required that our veggies be shipped long distances, which means that veg has already lost a great deal of vitamins before it reaches us. Add to this, the fact that the Cdn. govt. now nukes our vegetables to prolong freshness (?), which further destroys the vitamin content and digestive enzymes. Not to mention what eating nuked food does to our bodies.

Scientist tell us that the above isn't a problem. What they don't tell us, is that their salaries come from the food industry.
 SoTexMan
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 53
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/28/2007 1:11:54 PM
Hey, all:

Hey, Moraima: Yes, you are right on several points.

Our society has largely lost the talent of canning, and cellars for winter storage are a thing of the past. On top of that, the agricultural land is becoming a sterile growth medium, producing crops with lower and lower nutritional value. [Gee this is depressing.] And our system of production is highy centralized and energy-intensive--I read somewhere it takes a huge amount of energy to ship COLD WATER from coast to coast and continent to continent--in the form of fruits and vegetables. There is a thread here--'the politics of grass-roots' that is interesting. And the Canadian situation is similar to the U.S.--the Food and Drug Administration tells us everything is all right and they are run by the food and drug industry.

How does this relate to our aging--or not? Finding better sources of food keeps us younger. Git off yer bu tt. Grow it yerseff. Find it locally. Re-learn the nearly lost art of canning and preserving.

I live waaaay down South and I am waking up my garden right now--gonna do my favorites: strawberries, cauliflower, spinach, broccoli, radishes, all of which have those antioxidants I mentioned--plus some others maybe. Wanna drip some real fresh strawberry juice on some lovely woman's breast--aged or not--but that is another thread.

As John Muir said, "Tug on anything at all and you'll find it connected to everything else in the universe."

Eat your vegetables.

David


Messages done with sustainable energy, with Wind and Sun!
 canyunflyer
Joined: 2/6/2006
Msg: 57
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/29/2007 1:01:47 PM
I've decided that it is God's way of helping us out by making our close up vision get blurry as we age. I am Amazed at how much better looking I am in a mirror when I don't have my reading glasses on. When I do..it can be shocking. ugh. Look at those age spot thingys...and that gnarley hair.... that sun-scorched skin... those less than holly-wood white teeth...yuk.

However..... I'm fed up with the hypochondriacs, and the big fat slobs (male and female) who try and pass off their self created conditions as unavoidable and even preferred...and beautiful. go ahead. knock yourselves out living in your land of denial and pumped up pompousness. Keep making sense out of the un-sensable.... Keep putting any spin on it you want... but it is a fact: None of us can avoid aging. But some just age way more gracefully than others. Pure and simple. A little of it might be genetic... but most of it is lifestyle.

And it isn't all complicated. I'm not really buying into the billion dollar health suppliment industry. If you take in more calories than you put out..you get fat. Don't smoke! Don't drink to get intoxicated. (drink very little) eat whole foods. And...NEVER lose your childlike wonder and the kinds of activities that this will automatically create. Be very grateful you have legs and arms. Use them. Climb a steep hill today!!! Try it you'll like it. ha. So will your Butt!
 DoWeMatch
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 58
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/29/2007 1:36:16 PM
I can overlook thinning hair, but I cannot overlook the beer belly or man breasts simply because those represent lifes style and activity level and are not the result of aging (I once weighed in excess of 200 lbs so I know what it took to get to that point and what it took to get where I am today). I do not consider myself athletic, but I am in shape (I try to exercise every day), I do eat healthy (nothing prepackaged), and I look for that in a partner.
 afred549
Joined: 11/22/2006
Msg: 62
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/30/2007 4:41:05 PM

BUT I THINK OLDER MEN ALL LIKE YOUNGER WOMEN . AND IF YOU DON'T HAVE A PICTURE UP THERE THEY WON'T EVEN ANSWER YOU ..


I am not into young ladies. However, I do want a picture. I have been to meetings with non-pic people, and what was described to me did not match what I met. A picture in this day and age is a very simple thing to do.
 HipppyChick
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 63
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/30/2007 5:31:33 PM
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/25/2007 5:01:12 PM
Our bodies obviously change as we grow older. Knowing what your own body is going through and what it will do in the next five years or so...how forgiving are you when searching for a love interest?

Ladies, will you overlook thinning hair and beer belly on a man? Men, will you overlook cellulite and breasts starting to droop?

If you're in shape, will you only date those also in shape?

Personally = I've dated men with thinning to no hair since I was in my 20's and so were some of them! the less hair they have, the more shampoo for me! .. I don't think (at least not for me ) that hair is an issue at all, let alone an age issue. And as for the shape, be it in or out, I am more attracted to someone who is comfortable in his own skin - regardless of how much there is! I have met some big men who can keep up with me! HEY! I meant on the trail! sheesh!!

 babe_onfire
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 64
Our aging bodies
Posted: 1/30/2007 5:58:01 PM
my body is awesome..it does not age
nor does my mind
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 65
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Our aging bodies
Posted: 2/9/2007 7:43:11 AM
Ladies, will you overlook thinning hair and beer belly on a man?
I have no problem with dating a man who has "thinning hair", but I'm not inclined to overlook the "beer belly". It's an indication of bad diet, lack of proper exercise, and more than likely eventually diabetes down the road if it has not yet set in.

Diabetes is quite an unforgiving disease ... it ruins your kidneys, causes heart problems accompanied by circulation problems (evenutal loss of limbs) and if that doesn't happen, it will surely cause impotence ... which is devasting to men, and that leads to depression as well.


Men, will you overlook cellulite and breasts starting to droop?
I can understand the "drooping breast" question, but I have to ask ... why is it necessary or acceptable for anyone to have cellulite?


If you're in shape, will you only date those also in shape?
I'd prefer a man who is in shape ... but will be happy to date a man who acknowledges that he might not be in the best of shape and is actively working on getting into shape.
 JazzDan
Joined: 12/12/2005
Msg: 68
Our aging bodies
Posted: 2/9/2007 6:25:58 PM
After my divorce, I was determind to put my energy into self improvement, and instead of turning to drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex (hey, why didn't I think of that one!?) I turned to the gym. I was never out of shape per se', but I wasn't what I am now either, and it feels good. I didn't do it for anyone in particular, because I wasn't dating, but rather for myself, to reach a goal.

2 years later I'm in the best shape of my life, and it's helped my mental outlook as well as my physical. Heck, maybe I can do a Bow -Flex commercial too!...I've even got a six pack! No it doesn't make me any better than anyone else, but it IS a better ME.

For myself, It is important a woman takes care of herself, but she doesn't have to be a gym rat either. Some curves or a little round along the edges is fine with me, sometimes that's sexy. I'm a face/eyes man as much as a butt man, and let's face it...unless you're living in a nudist colony, you're looking at faces and eyes the most.

:P
 Deeptrolling
Joined: 1/1/2007
Msg: 74
Our aging bodies
Posted: 2/10/2007 5:58:20 PM
Well of course men are visual creatures. And that's why God made women sexy and attractive to get our attention. But.........there are women men want to look at and women want to be with. And then there are the women men don't want to live without. And visual has very very little to do with that. If she's drop dead adorable sobeit LOL
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