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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?      Home login  
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 mprefont
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 5
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?Page 1 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
Hi Wenlex

To be honest its quite true that men are very flattered when approached by a women. To be honest I find that women more interesting than if I was the one making the first move.

I think we all know by this time if you don't take the initiative sometimes, you may miss the boat.

Something to think about.

I looked at your profile and to be honest I am quite surprised you don't have a lot of requests to know you more.

Your very attractive, you seem to have a great personality and one of the biggest things, is that you know what you want

All I can say if you were in my neck of the woods, I would be more than interested

Wish you the best
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 11
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/7/2007 9:37:43 AM
Wenlex,

You are now in the same situation that many of us, both women and men, have been in for some time.

Dating is hard and finding the right one even harder. Many of us do not want to be alone, and look forward to finding another that we can relate to on many levels. You are now there and wanting more than what you currently have.

You are good looking and want men to approach you because of your shyness and insecurity with the dating game, yet you expect men to not feel that way and approach you.....why is that????

Many of us wait to be approached, or given the proper signals for getting to know another, and if not done, we let it go also. To many women seem annoyed by men hitting on them, or bothering them when out, so many of us just let it go and wait for you to approach us or pass by and talk for a few seconds, or ask a question, giving us the signal that you might want to know us better.

You now have the ability, as do many of us with our maturity, to attract those in their 20's, 30's, 40's, and yes 50's too. Maybe it is time to put the age thing to bed and just find someone you can relate to on all levels, no matter the age, and go for it???

Just my opinion.....
 justforumsplease
Joined: 2/6/2007
Msg: 12
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/7/2007 10:11:13 AM
The glittering generalities blinded me for a moment... sorry.

I'm 39, and I still prefer older women.
 Trapper872
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 13
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/7/2007 10:19:09 AM
Wenlex:

I think that it would be flattering to be propositioned by younger women myself.. but speaking as a 34 year old male myself.. i can state that i find myself attracted to older women.. for many reasons.
But lets face facts.. at 21-28 any straight Male would bang a hole in the wall if it had a pulse, some hair and was warm. Albeit, its not what you are looking for.. i'd chalk it up to the 'Flattered' category and pleasantly either dismiss them or ignore them. Some of these kids can be real 'pigs' if u know what i mean.. also.. they could be LYINg simply to try and appeal more desirable.

Myself.. i steer clear of anything under 30 yrs old basically because at 30, most women have everything going on in their lives.. peak everything adult-wise.. and whether women know it or not.. men can almost see the sexuality emmitting from women even in pictures. Myself included.. your picture is of someone who is very beautiful and happy.

aahh to be in my 20's again.. see for a 20 yr old male.. its tough as heck.. girls/women your own age tend to have more fleeting interests.. in my case, the girls my age wanted that 'older man, sugar daddy' thing going on.. and these same older sugardaddies.. want a women under 25.. some get really disgusting tho.. there should be NO connection between a 15 uear old and a 49 year old.. ever.. male OR female.. but thats my opinion.

to sum it up.. you deserve the flattery.. soak it up.. enjoy it.. theres no need to respond or even reply if you dont have any interest. These people ALL know that's part of the game we all play here.. Trial and error.

Heck.. if u lived nearby, id wanna knock on your door myself..
sadly, distance is the romantic killer most of the time.
 Dreamer1400
Joined: 5/28/2006
Msg: 18
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 6:44:18 AM
I prefer women in their 30s but they are afraid of my age...which is truly just a number in my case. I work with tons of women in their 20s and 30s and they all do not think I look or act my age. And they cannot believe I do not have someone in my life.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 19
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 9:37:25 AM
I do not stay away from most woman when it comes to age. I have dated younger women who are much more together and mature than many twice their age, and I have dated women older than I am and enjoyed every minute of it.....

What I look for, and I hope those looking at me, are the qualities that will keep me around wanting even more. Those are, an active life style, physical attraction, fit and trim enough for all to know that they take care of themselves, educated enough to hold a good conversation with all those around, no matter the types and situations, and financially secure enough to offer me as much as I offer them.

Is that asking for to much????? I hope not......

About the only thing, other than smoking that would eliminate many, would be if they still wanted children, which I do not, so that may eliminate many of the younger females who still want to have more family.

Just my opinion.....
 Discreetpassion
Joined: 3/2/2007
Msg: 21
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 10:45:32 AM
Hi,I'm Tom and I can think of several reasons for this:Younger guys are usually a lot more****,willing to risk rejection and also are often more sexually driven than a lot-but not all- older men,who have more than likely had some bad experiences with women(hence their availability)and are more reluctant to approach them in,say,a bar.Many men of all ages are shallower than a puddle and this shallowness equals not looking for a woman for the PERSON, for the companionship,fun,conversation or even the sex(and if they ARE looking for great sex they will likely be disappointed since,compared to women over 30,very young women,generally,are clumsy,unenthusiastic,unwilling to experiment and still unfamiliar enough with THEMSEVES to know what REALLY "rocks their boat")but so they can feel good about themselves and have a "trophy" to show off.So they go for young,often VERY young women so that they can feel like-and "show the world"-that they "still have it",that they're a stud.etc.
Young men are often influenced by mass media,pop culture and trends,and a popular trend in many "adult magazines" and videos for some years now has been promoting the younger man/older woman mystique.(Which is where the term "MILF" originated)
For YOU,personally,I could also see an intimidation factor and a certain amount of fear of rejection/reluctance to risk asking you out because you are quite beautiful and many men lose some confidence as they age because of bad experiences,the fact that as one ages they experience health/body problem ranging from thinning hair to early arthritis to not healing a quickly as they used to,etc and ,perhaps,their buying into the whole "YOUTH IS EVERYTHING" BS promoted by the mass media.(which many people,sadly,DO buy into even though if looked at objectively the old saying"youth is wasted on the young" is very,very true)
I think you should also know that in my 43 years I'm confident that I've never met a man who would be offended by you messaging them first(BUT they might very well think that you are "on the prowl" or looking for sex)-but if you don't want to take that step just yet,make sure you put the men you like in your favorites list which they probably check often(since women often DON'T make the first move )so they KNOW you like them and will hopefully then make the "first" move.Good luck,keep your eyes open and your wits about you-I wish I had some advice for how to find a man who is REALLY,truly honest,and isn't a selfish,unfeeling a--hole,but........javascript:smilie('')
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 23
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 1:19:05 PM
It must be nice to be you then and have ALL men hit on you ALL the time.....

Many of us get hit on and is it not amazing how we view it so much differently when someone approaches us and that is the one we want?

When I see comments like the one you just made, it affirms my belief to not approach a woman until she comes to me or gives me the signals that she wants to know me better by walking by me and saying something, or asking me a question, or smiling at me specifically when sitting, standing or walking by.

Why annoy or bother another at all? Rejection is hard enough on all of us, and to be put in the same category as ALL men, is just another reason not to.

I smile politely when those like you and your age wonder why I am not hitting on you, and I sit enjoying another drink won by a bet on age.......smiles......

Just my opinion......
 Happily Ever...maybe
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 24
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 3:14:50 PM
OP, have to agree with what many have said here, that you're not only very attractive, but look young for your age as well. And because you do look younger and are free to do so, you probably hang out in places where there are more younger guys, and that's why they are the ones you are attracting at this point.

I personally enjoy women in their 30s most of all. I too am looking to likely have a family someday, if I can meet the right right woman before it gets too late for me. For me, a woman in her 30s that is past her wild, carousing days, and is looking for a good, honest and dependable man to make a life with would be ideal. But all too often I'm out of their age range, or they live too far away. But I won't give up, and you shouldn't either. Good luck!
 Fun_Dog8
Joined: 12/27/2006
Msg: 25
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/8/2007 9:31:47 PM
Wen, I read your profile after reading your post and wanted to respond to you off the forum board. It is difficult to respond to a profile when the person you are responding to won't accept your e-mails. Perhaps it is not that you are young in appearance. Many of us guys over 30 require a foundation so when we go out we look to start conversation.
A few of the women who responded earlier suggested you get a little more "agressive" perhaps that should be stated as "assertive". Some of the best dates I have been out on have been with the women who actually call after we talk in line at the 7-11, or the grocery store as tacky as it sounds if you can chat in public you could probably (oops) have a great date. Have the courage to follow through when we (us older guys) "throw the ball in your court" so to speak. Most of us by this age are looking for an equal. That starts with inititave.
On to the next point ..... 30 is risky.... transitional age for both genders. 33 or better usually stable again or close to it.....
 SingleGuy4912
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 26
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:04:31 AM
Wenlex,

If you aren't getting any nibbles from guys in your age range, then you need to up your age range. There are lots of guys in their 40's who would love to date you. Some of them still might want kids. Simple as that. I wish I could find a woman in her 30's who doesn't already have kids but still wants them. They're increasingly harder to find.
 *mandrake*
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 31
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/11/2007 5:58:21 PM
I am 49 years old. I have my life the way I like it, and my girls are grown up. I don't mind younger women when it comes to sex, but for a real relationship, I prefer women no younger than 39.
 SuperFunGuy
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 32
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/12/2007 12:31:17 AM
Every guy out there is different. I'm 34 and as for the dating scene, I have dated women from their mid 20's to mid 30's. Finding the right girl and this dating thing its harder than I thought. Beginning to not like going out with all my friends who are married or have girlfriends. Feels like I am the third wheel at times. Its so hard to find connection with a girl these days.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 33
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/12/2007 8:14:17 AM

I prefer women no younger than 39.


*Walks away heartbroken...

I still Love you Dale...
 *mandrake*
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 34
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/12/2007 8:38:20 AM
Well, I did say "Prefer!!" It's not written in stone ya know! Hmmmm 37? That's pretty close!
 *mandrake*
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 35
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/12/2007 8:38:47 AM
Well, I did say "Prefer!!" It's not written in stone ya know! Hmmmm 37? That's pretty close!
 randomstoic
Joined: 3/2/2007
Msg: 37
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/12/2007 6:09:48 PM
Ok I have some comments on your profile based on reading lots of profiles by Bay Area women (check out the recent NYtimes article on on-line dating). Your profile contains some very general things and it also leaves the impression that you like to have fun. I think this theme is very common among people in their twenties, but older men might like a sense of how you are grounded. I would include several things:

1. Try to list some creative things about yourself in an innovative way. You can include odd habits (I always look behind when crossing the street to see who is watching my rear"), funny things your dog does ("he is my baby and sometimes guy magnet"), and a catchy thing about your daily routine ("I drink my coffee first thing so I'm awake enough not confuse the shower with the sink").

2. Try to talk about the characteristics you would want in a partner and what your long-term goals would be. Younger men might be put off by committment (even if it is long-term).

3. Talk about how you have grown. This will give men a sense that you have evolved and a more attractive prospect with whom to settle. Or, more to the point, it will remind them that your interests are more than wandering into "said random pub" and quaffing beer until some doofus notices you. Talk about what you would like to do for fun as well as growth (from long walks to rock climbing [ everyone in the Bay Area must want to join the Green Berets]to exploring odd flea markets and cafes).

4. Listen to all these guys. You have nothing to worry about in the attraction department, just let more of you show in your profile.


Bonne chance!
 nacbikeguy
Joined: 3/6/2007
Msg: 44
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 3/19/2007 8:42:48 PM
Well I would not 'stay away' from you , but I'm still in my 30's.... not sure why these men you speak of are not intrested..mayhaps theylove the Y---M---ccccc-A (dunh dunh dunh dunh dunh.)
 orchidtigress
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 49
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 12:12:25 AM
Depends what they aer looking for.
 HAWKEYE1251
Joined: 4/3/2007
Msg: 50
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 8:12:12 AM
Well Darling,

Except for the fact that I am 1 year out of your age range and that there are more than just a few hundred miles between us, I would contact you in a minute. As for why those that meet your criteria won't pursue you, is beyond me! I've always said that Texas has the prettiest women in the world, but I'm seeing some very interesting profiles here.

I would get a good belly laugh listening to you sing while your dog is dragging you along. Just the thought is putting a smile on my face.

If things don't improve, maybe you could consider a trip down south.

I think you are very attractive, it seems mentally and physically and someone your age should be honored to even communicate with you.

Just my 2 cents worth.

Hawk
 lifesshort03
Joined: 12/14/2006
Msg: 51
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 9:16:43 AM
Wenlex,
I have to agree with a lot of what geneseo is saying here. Your very attractive and that alone is intimiating to most men. Especially those, like us old farts (yes, I said it) who get rejected multiple times on a daily basis. I cannot imangine you getting rejected at all, but I am sure it happens occasionally. If you make the first move, I guarantee that you will have plenty of men to choose from and your problem will be finding a guy who actually wants to explore having a relationship. But, like us old farts (OK, stop it already???) your going to have to make that move.
Good luck!
 wishuwerhere
Joined: 5/10/2006
Msg: 52
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 4:46:53 PM
OP Based on your statement that you do want to date guys your own age.

It is not that hard if you try & put yourself in situations with an older crowd.
Try & do that based on interests & hobbies that you have.

Looking at your pic. You look young, so younger guys will approach( believe me enjoy it, there will be a day when you miss it-lol)
I am suprised older guys are not approaching you. With age usually comes a bit of self assurance & confidence.

Are you looking at the young guys & giving them the smile signal & not to the older guys?
Is this mostlyhappening just here online?
I am not going to lie to you Mid 30's is a sucky age for women.
I can tell you based on what women friends tell me.To long to list reasons why & I am sure most everyone does not want to hear it.
 Dreamer1400
Joined: 5/28/2006
Msg: 54
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:39:51 PM
I would give my left arm to meet and have a relationship with a woman in her 30's. Or at least someone who looks that age.
 spiketwo
Joined: 4/7/2007
Msg: 55
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Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/13/2007 7:12:48 PM
no i would be glad to talk to you but then again do women in there 30s want to talk to men in there 40s ??
 whothehellknows
Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 56
Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/14/2007 6:06:40 AM

I would like to attract men my own age; but honestly need some advice.


I have been accused of only liking younger women, but that is false. I would love to meet a lady around my age who either isn't being controlled by her biological clock to settle down and get married, have an average build or doesn't have a bunch of children. It seems to be very hard to find that in a woman close to my age (I'm 38).

I am very open to something more long term, but I think the dating part has to come before the couple part. The weight and kids thing is just a personal preference, and I am more flexible on the children issue if she only have one or two and/if they are older.
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