Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life b      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 1
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?Page 1 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
This is a question in connection to one of the other forum threads about prostitution that I'm talkin in and would just like to know peoples opinions on if they would date a person (male or female) knowing that that person had at same stage for however long been a sex worker. If no please explain...... I myself am a escourt in sydney australia and although I have a partner at the moment. It does worry me about future partners and how they may react. Would you tell your future partner that you had once worked in the industry?. Even if it was years ago? And if your partner had come to you and admitted that they had once been in the industry what would you do?
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 2
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/21/2007 9:04:31 PM
Honestly if you did it years ago,and you had been tested and retested and you are clean, i don't see why you need to tell your new love about that part of your past. Personally i would not want to know.

How would i react if someone i was in a relationship with told me they were a former prostitute? I don't know, I would like to think i would be open-minded enough to overlook something that long in the past (Actually someone questioned if i was actually as open-minded as i claimed to be recently). But i honestly don't know how i would react. I think this is one of those cases that what i don't know will not bother me.
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 3
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/21/2007 9:51:01 PM
Testing is odviously an issue. But as vicking gal says normal people can have STD's too so its not only workers that we have to worry about....

HERE'S ANOTHER QUESTION;
If you knew that the person was a prostitue you would demand a std test before you got to close wouldn't you. But if you didn't even know what the persons past was I'm pretty sure most people will have sex with this "new fling" without even thinking about STD's.......
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 4
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/21/2007 9:56:50 PM
DDREAM

Could you please explain to me why you feel its impossible to have a relationship with someone who was once a prostitute?. Cause if you picked up a chick at the pub you can never be sure of what she has done in the past. And if she never told you you would never be the wiser....
 SimplyTony
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 5
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/22/2007 6:19:06 PM
I wouldn't be upset if someone that i dated told me that they "use" to be a prostitute. If they were a prostitute right now while we were dating, then i couldn't be with them. What's in the past is in the past and it's not a big deal to me. As long as you're disease free everything is alright. If you are a prostitute while we are dating, then i wouldn't want to be with you at all because i wouldn't know if you could ever truly be in love with me.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 6
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/23/2007 5:35:19 PM
I have dated someone who was a male stripper ~ it was a long time ago and I knew that is what he did with himself. I suppose I date the man, not the job-of-choice. The only issue I had was that he had a terrible time living life without the bar scene. It was his "norm" and not my "norm."

No matter what someone's reality is, health issues should be a concern for all people. That includes doctors, lawyers, strippers or concrete laborers. If you've had unprotected sex ONE time, you are at risk. Period. I'm a testing fiend ~ it's just a smart thing to do. Oddly, I've known women who were prostitutes and/or call girls/strippers at one point or another and they were probably much more concerned about stds than many women I know who weren't in the industry of sexual nature.

As for disclosure ~ well, that is subjective. I live by a strict policy that I do NOT ask about someone's sexual past, nor do I answer probing questions about my sexual history ~ test results and safe sex take care of that. BUT, there is a fine line between disclosing sexual partner numbers and/or preferences and knowing that someone earned or earns a living by selling sex. My guess would be that more often than not, it would not be accepted in a positive manner. I think I'd feel obligated to disclose my former profession if it appeared that a relationship was building ~ dating on the other hand, I doubt I'd say anything. It's just almost impossible to know what to do here without being in the situation. Good luck OP ~ your honesty here is testimony of your character ~ that is as important as what you do for a living (at least in my opinion.)
 Pleasurelimits
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 7
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/24/2007 12:27:14 AM
Hey Sabel,
As one skippy to another I have a friend who has a 'practice' in relationship and marraige counselling and he in fact has married a former 'worker' and they are VERY happy, in a discussion one night he and she told me that they never worried about the other partner straying 'cause she has had plenty of sex over her time and has still found him to be her 'life' partner, and she is just so happy that he accepted her 'warts and all'. I think I have the same view if my partner had tried plenty but was happy with me I would take that as a compliment and be happy that she chose me to spend her life with, But hey after two tours of war zones I think there are plenty more things to worry about, BUT I would definitely tell someone first if the relationship was getting serious 'cause you need to know his/her potential long term view of you and what you have done. Find the right one and go for it!
PL
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 8
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/24/2007 1:12:46 AM
Ok this is going to sound terrible but in reply to previous post ( can't remember who) but the money is addictive. And I think that is what keeps me doing it. There is no other job where I can walk home with 1000-1500$ a week. Maybe more. I have gotten accustomed to the life that the job provides me and don't want to go back to anything else. I have dated though out me working and he had known about everything. I never hid a thing from him and he never complained about it due to the fact that I payed evrything for him.... But the money is the biggest issue I guess and that is why I probally would stay in it for a bit longer.....I realise that is probally hard for people to understand
 kk1982
Joined: 5/20/2006
Msg: 9
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/24/2007 9:41:31 PM
hell no i won't, can't deal with prostitutes.
 HikingFitGuy
Joined: 3/20/2007
Msg: 10
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 3/24/2007 10:23:45 PM
no way, I just couldn't. I wouldn't know where they have been or the type of people they have associated with. Plus a lot of hookers are involved in drugs etc, totally opposite my lifestyle and values.
 Sicanius
Joined: 3/10/2007
Msg: 11
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/5/2007 11:18:07 PM
sabel15788, having never been a sex worker( hey look at my pictures, who would pay ?), i wonder what problems you see a person might have with dating a former sex worker.
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 12
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/8/2007 5:37:10 PM
I just need to say, as I was reading through the posts I was pretty amazed that there has been no flaming...yet. Lol.
But I am gonna have to say that prostitution and drug use seem to be connected in a lot of peoples minds. Now I don't know what its like everywhere else but from what I've seen of the industry in australia its nuffin like that at all. We have clean, safe and drug free environments to work because it is legal over here.
This is not to say that some prostitues don't take drugs routinely. But some adverage joes take drugs routinely aswell. Are they badgered and sterotyped for it for ever.
 Agallah005
Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 13
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/10/2007 6:18:52 AM
Hell no, AIDS sticks around for about seven or so years, and Herpes never goes away, it's the Gift that keeps on giving. exposing myself to someone like that isn't my cup of tea. I wouldn't pay to bang a prostitute, so why would I date one?
I'd be damned if I did something that crazy.
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 14
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/14/2007 2:25:36 AM

would she date a man that can not afford to pay the meter by the side if her bed


Vinnie..

That's kinda rough don't you think? With that statement your basically saying that a working grl or ex-workin grl would only be with a guy for the money.... We do have feelings... We are capable of love....capable of holding a solid realtionship apart from work.... And presumably if you were in a relationship with a working grl or ex worker you would not be expected to pay. I thought that was given but then again that's only the way I think. I don't know what other grls would do....
At the moment I am an escourt/prostitue and I have been with my partner for 3 yrs now. He has know about me working all along and as a matter of fact I earn more than him. I am the bread winner in the house hold. But I still love him and I'm still with him because I love him. Not because he "puts him money in the meter"......
 PhilMeUpBaby
Joined: 3/9/2007
Msg: 15
view profile
History
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/16/2007 3:39:49 PM
I was seeing someone back in 2001 who was a prostitute at the time. I knew about it before I met her face to face (ie we met via a dating web site) and had no problem with it. BUT, I wasn't really emotionally involved with her.

I also knew that she was the one girl that I knew would not have any STDs, and would not get pregnant. She was checked regularly, and her livelihood depended on it. Naturally, her and I always used condoms, without fail. Quite frankly, it was a relief to meet someone who was as disciplined about condoms as I am. And yes, the "relief" part was intended to be a really bad pun.

Interestingly enough, the sex between us was scarce, to say the least. It happened roughly six times over two or three months. As someone later told me, the last thing a chef wants to do when he/she gets home is cook dinner. Oh well. She eventually confided in me that for her, the chemistry just wasn't there (ie she didn't get "butterflies" in her stomach). It was ultimately I that called it off; she had quite a chip on her shoulder... major depression issues.

However, for me, it's not about emotions. It's business. If someone was to earn a high income out of it, invest that money and set herself up for life, then I wish her well. If I was to know someone who was in that line of work then the last thing that I would want is for her to spend any money on me. It's not a long term career, it is something that should contribute to future personal security. A home that she owns, and hopefully income generating investments, is what I would like to see.

Heck, if I was ever a pimp then my girls would have a financial adviser and become millionaires real quick.

For a few months now, I have also been talking on MSN with a 21yr old girl who was a prostitute for a couple of years (she "retired" last year). She drifted into an expensive drug habit, hence the move into an occupation that paid quick cash, and lots of it. She's now out of the industry and out of major drugs. These days she lives on a low income which is earned at a fast food shop. She's actually a very intelligent individual with a well developed mind, and I look forward to meeting her in person one of these days (we also speak on the phone as well). I have a great deal of genuine respect for her - she has experienced some very different things in life, and has actually come out of it an extremely good person.

My only issue with sabel15788 is that she allows her boyfriend to (partially) live off her. It's money that she earns, so I'd rather see it go towards her future (ie financial investments or future study and gaining other qualifications). If her and I were in the same city, then I'd certainly have no issue with being friends with her. Her comments indicate that she is a mature and intelligent person, and her postings on this thread show more thought and intelligence than those of people that criticise her profession. I certainly wish her well.

For the record, I have never paid for sex. The only prostitute that I have ever (knowingly) had any physical contact with is the lady that I was seeing back in 2001, and there was never any sort of financial exchange during that, or any other, time.
 PhilMeUpBaby
Joined: 3/9/2007
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/16/2007 4:19:33 PM
Oh, one last thing... I have designed and built web sites for a couple of brothels and escort places here in Perth. Ok, so I'm weird... but there's just something about taking money *from* a brothel that amuses the living daylights out of me. Damn funny! One of them offers to pay via contra, but I take the money every time (and will always do so). Heck, at $350 an hour, I'd rather spend that sort of money on more important things in life... ie motorbike gear!
 sabel15788
Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 17
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/18/2007 10:01:07 AM
Okkkk..
You have a very STRONG opinion. To say the least. But I'm not saying your all right. I admit some working grls are like that. Ofcourse. Depending on the people and influences you have had as a worker. But I can definatly assure you that I am not a sociopath, I DEFINATLY do not have any "deep seeded issues or character flaws" and I can tell you now that that I am no where near being co dependant on anybody.
I'm just wondering what religion you are (not as an insult) because you seem to have a very one sided, non-negotiable, spiteful view of the industry. Which is your perogitive, of course. But it tends to come along with being highly religious.
I have noticed this with other posters with such degrading views. I tend to see people that behave like that as a sociopath. Showing devoit of individual character, morphing to one generalized belif system... (((((That is in no way an attack on religion or religious people)))))). Just a generalized observation.
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 18
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/18/2007 10:21:46 AM
What they have done in thier life before should
be kept there unless you really really cant deal with it-
Would I date a guy who was a prostitute - yes I would - why
would I not- because he has had alot of sex partners and got
money to have sex. People sell themselves on so many levels
every day in life and get no money for it - So I figure really whats
the difference - because it is sex - like anything else - we are all
prone to do things that we are not so proud of sometimes to live-
thats just the way it is-
Respect your body - we do not respect other people on some levels
in life - who are we to say they have no respect for themselves-
I think that this decision is more a morality decision than actually looking
at this person as a person and knowing the whole story before we judge -
people do self destructive things for different reasons - they have thier
reasons-
 brian3400br
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 19
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/19/2007 5:56:55 PM
I think what a person did in the past is just that, the past. Too many people want to dig up other peoples mistakes and use that against them. The way I have seen things is that if you do something good nobody remembers it but if you do something bad no one forgets it.

As long as a person in that proffesion can put that behind them and not let old habits and old lifestyle choice affect a new relationship then it should be as if you never ever did this in your life.

I have known a lot of different peoople in my life and I can honestly say that I have met prostitutes that are way more real and honest and caring than a lot of other girls out there who claim to be in the mainstream of things.

I think I would go out with a girl like you but like anyone else I would base that on what you were like inside just the same as I would go out with a girl who never did this kind of thing.

I would love to here back from you real soon.
Take care for now.

Brian.
 orchidtigress
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 20
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 4/19/2007 6:16:25 PM
I guess it comes down to you and what you're comfortable sharing. If someone truly loves you though I do not believe it should matter. I went out with a male gigolo years ago and it didn't matter to me that "professionally" he had at one time slept with women for money....he was sleeping with me for free!..lol.
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 22
view profile
History
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:20:19 PM
I haven't worked in the industry, but if I did, I would be inclined to bring it up about the time when any past indiscretions need to be mentioned. I'm not a saint. But I don't have regrets about what I did or went through. So I have no respect for anyone who thinks less of me for them. If she cannot handle hearing about the basic facts, then she definitely cannot handle me.

If she used to be in it, I'd want to talk about it, because there could be a lot of problems:
1) Her attitude to sex with me. It might affect how she views sex, and so I'd need to be upfront and honest and see where our views differ.
2) Her attitude to the relationship with me. Same as above, but for relationships.
3) If guys in the area paid her for sex. The area I live in right now has a lot of a**holes, who love to discuss other people's sexual history and bring it up. So I could get very angry with certain people, and it might mean that we would have to avoid certain places, like the pubs in the area.

I've met a few prostitutes and become friends with them. But that's as far as it went. No real attraction, or connection. But if it happened, I would have no choice but to deal with it all, and try to give it a real chance. I very rarely fall for someone, but when I do, my heart does not care what they did, so I ended up finding I was only over her when I moved out of the area. So it's a real issue for me. Not everyone is that way. Most women can just move on and forget people. I don't really forget anyone, I'm just not thinking about them right now.
 Bezoar
Joined: 4/6/2007
Msg: 23
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 7/4/2007 9:06:49 PM
I would have no problem at all. Past or present is fine with me because at least id have the knowledge that i would know she is sleeping aorund, and not have to wait 5 months after getting dumped to be informed that she was cheating on me with 5 other guys, all at once.

Ive known whores and i have known prostitutes. Prostitutes being the ones who traded sex for money they normally spent on cloths, toys, booze.
And the whores well, there was one in particular who would give you vaginal sex for a 6 pack of heiniken, and would strip down and let you stick it vaginaly/analy and with out a condom if you wished for a bottle of rum or vodka.

so i dont see a problem if ya wanted to hook up with me at all. no problem.
 smsweendoggy
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 24
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 7/4/2007 9:09:56 PM
No way baby!! Im not into eating other guys rockets! I'd have to pass ,there's plenty more fish in the sea.
 Philhelm
Joined: 6/25/2007
Msg: 25
view profile
History
 sometimes_miss
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 26
Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?
Posted: 7/5/2007 6:30:52 AM
It's called 'the oldest profession' for good reason, so considering my ex took me for all she could basically made her no different from someone who charges by the day. And you know what, no matter how you look at it, it's just a job. Would you date a physical therapist that rubs your neck? Yes? So why not someone who rubs your penis? What's the big deal?

As far as it being your chosen job, well, you find something you like to do, and find a way to make money doing it. Nothing wrong with that. Date an ex sex worker? Why not? Plenty of people date soldiers who kill people for a living. I'd rather date someone who made people happy for a living. Much better for the world.
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute?