Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > how would you handle this      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 northernmiss
Joined: 7/9/2006
Msg: 3
how would you handle thisPage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
listen to your family, they will always love you.

Get out while you have anything left, and get a lawyer....


I am sorry this is happening to you.
 dfctr
Joined: 1/5/2007
Msg: 21
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 6:44:43 AM
wake up man, she comes 2 u when she cant get the money out of ur card....
she took 10k, if she was responsible enough, she would have been paying u back the instalments if not the full amount rather than askin 4 more. the crises and further crises... does that ring a bell? then she kicks u out.... i mean aint that a 'love' in convenience and then a loss of affection when she cant milk u anymore?

wake up from ur fairtale dream, she aint gonna pay u back unless u make her pay.

she f***** u, u think of ways of f******* her back. say tell the cops she stole ur card which she probably did. maybe she is involved in something more serious that u know of. think about making things so tough 4 her that she wont do it 2 another man, which she probably is while we talkin.

forget about the money, be a bonus if comes back, otherwise restart a new life. i can bet u 10k if she returns u any. hey try telling her u lost all the money to a fraudulent company or some crap. guaranteed she will lose her 'feelings' 4 ya. wake up man, u had had a long ride.
 Fry Lock
Joined: 10/4/2005
Msg: 23
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 7:01:23 AM
She must give one helluva blow job....or something.....can I borrow 20 bucks?

Fry
 Jackie1954
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 25
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 10:16:27 AM

... I went into a crises shelter after losing my house. I spent 5 days in there and ended up dating my counselor. 3 weeks after we met I .... loaned her 10 grand to pay off her car loan, as she was about to lose it. a week later she lost her job and I moved in with her. after 5 months of paying for everything ...... she finally got her unemployment (she had to fight for it cause she got fired)

Let me guess.... I hope she was fired for having a sexual/personal relationship with a patient/client. This is totally unethical professional behavior.

Find yourself a different "counselor" (preferably male) and let them help you figure out why you allow yourself to be used to such an extent. Did you even consider lending her enough to catch up on her car payments instead of paying off a $10,000 debt for her??

You two are a total disaster together. Neither of you know how to prioritize/handle financial responsibility (you lost your home- yet you thought her car was more important than you getting financially back on your feet). Neither of you know how to set or keep boundaries. She is a "user" and you want her so badly that you allow her to use you for every cent you have- because you know that is the only way she will be with you.

You need serious help!
 chuchurillo
Joined: 2/15/2007
Msg: 45
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 8:32:10 PM
No it's not a case of not thinking with the right head, I think it's the super man syndrom of rescuing a damsel in destress.
Lots of guys have fallen for it, since the begining of time. Who doesnt want to feel like the big important man?
 cedar77
Joined: 7/17/2006
Msg: 47
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 8:48:38 PM
I still love her deeply, but I don't think she really misses me. My sister reccommends taking her to court to reclaim the car loan, but I'm afraid if I do that I will never have another chance with her again.

Yeah ...call me "old fashioned" , but , a law suit just might throw a bit of a wet blanket on the romance.... lol

I would say you should talk with her and if she does not make a real effort to make good ...you should have nothing to do with her except to try to recoup what she owes you.
 PC2000
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 49
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/22/2007 9:15:03 PM
This woman sounds to me like a very "smart cooky" unless of course all of a sudden ( I doubt it) she became the type of person everybody thinks she is by a temporary mental lapse from losing her job otherwise, the chances are that she did it before.

If you find her work history along with any legal court records you will have the peace of the puzzle that you need to make your decision. I am assuming you have enough of her information to start searching those databases. Compare those records with the stories she already told you ... if start smelling funny don't eat her cooky and file ASAP the court papers.

PC2000
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 65
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/23/2007 7:31:00 AM
Someone had a thread the other day asking, "Am I really that stupid?"

Dude, you are really that stupid. Stop it, now.
 MB58SC
Joined: 2/1/2007
Msg: 67
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/23/2007 10:01:13 AM
You'll need to take this to court. Contact a lawyer.
 Nienna Telrunya
Joined: 8/19/2006
Msg: 71
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/24/2007 2:17:43 PM

I think she violated her professional conduct as a counsellor in your situation [/qote]

I must say i agree with mmmmoet on this one. She used you, and will continue to do so until you stop it.

Good Luck
 Halexus
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 72
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/24/2007 2:57:05 PM
But does she love you?

Sometimes you have to let some things go, no matter how much it hurts. And it seems that she is now causing you more grief than happiness.

It is time to pull the reins, and tell her that it is enough. You need your money back, and she needs to learn to not use people.
 cedar77
Joined: 7/17/2006
Msg: 73
view profile
History
how would you handle this
Posted: 3/24/2007 10:36:45 PM
well o.p. , check back into the crisis centre and give it another go.....you got yourself a bad councillor.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > how would you handle this