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 XoticDeeva
Joined: 4/10/2007
Msg: 1
Never married & no kidsPage 1 of 24    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24)
You see a profile of interest & he or she is 30something & up, as you continue 2 read a lil further, you notice that he or she has never been married & has 0 kids, do you question why or just immediately make assumptions?
 Geneseo
Joined: 2/27/2007
Msg: 2
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 11:40:24 AM
I would just make assumptions.

I would assume, that he has been responsible enough, to use birth control with his partners, because he might have realized, that 1. There are already too many people on the planet. 2. He might feel that he would be unable to provide a safe, financially secure environment for his offspring, and he doesn't want to be irresponsible. 3. He didn't find anyone compatable to marry, and was not willing to settle for a relationship out of mere desperation, in order to avoid being single.

I'm sure there are many more assumptions that can be made, just as there can be made for women and men who have been married several times, and have a bunch of kids that they cannot afford to take care of properly.
 that sam i am
Joined: 10/27/2006
Msg: 3
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 11:41:11 AM
I'm 32 and clever enough to not be married or breed :) I kinda expect the same in a mate.
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 4
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History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 12:10:51 PM
Yeah, I'd basically assume that they've been responsible up to now.
They've been careful with sex, using protection and what have you.
And they've not jumped into a marriage of convenience.
 Just Chelle
Joined: 7/26/2006
Msg: 5
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 12:42:39 PM
I would call her smart.
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 6
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 12:45:16 PM
Thread search is your friend. A

And B. I'd assume they didn't want kids, didnt meet the right person, weren't in a hurry.. or all of the above.

There's the 3 reasons I'm 36 and unmarried and child-free.
 it-wasnt-me
Joined: 4/28/2007
Msg: 7
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 2:21:21 PM
I would not make assumptions. Each to their own. I get enough assumptions on being a single mother so, I would never do that for those who have never been married or don't have kids. Some people put career, travel, first, who haven't found the right person, or whose goals in life aren't to get married at a young age, and have kids.

We are all individuals, none of our choices are right or wrong.! as long as we are on the same page if we should date, that is all that matters to me
 mystic2007
Joined: 2/18/2007
Msg: 8
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 3:31:35 PM
I find it funny that some people would prefer an over 30 with broken marriages than an over 30 that has never been married. It is not 1950 anymore... Women go to college now and try to have some form of a life.. They do not graduate high school, marry their high school sweetheart, have a baseball team of kids and bake cookies . Both sexes that are over 30, never been married and have no kids - I would say they are the smart ones. Hopefully they have taken the time to learn about themselves and grow.. Not just jumped from one marriage to another in an attempt to discover their true selves.

I have talked to guys on here who are in their mid 30's and have been married 2 -3 times... That scares me way more than a guy who have never married.
 kmhstx
Joined: 4/7/2007
Msg: 9
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 3:31:37 PM
I would be like YAY, lol I've never been married and have no kids. I'm 30 and I want both, and it would be nice to have the same in a mate.... I wouldn't make any assumptions negative or positive.
 trishadish
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 10
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 6:39:47 PM
Thats a tough call, perhaps in the early 30s would be 'whatever'.....but when I meet a guy in the later 30s or even 40s who has never been married or kids, I have to ponder, in relationship to my experiences and his lack there of.........
 kittybiscuit
Joined: 2/11/2007
Msg: 11
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 6:45:25 PM
I'm 30 and childfree because I spent my 20s working, going to school, then establishing a career. Now that I have taken care of that business, it's time to settle down...

I would assume the same from a man in his early 30s. Chances are that he has had one or several LTRs with lots of playing inbetween but just never settled down because he was in school and later establishing a career. My guess is that he is a professional and takes it seriously as a means of providing for his future family...but maybe I am too optimistic?

Or he could just be a loser who still lives at home with his mama and has severe emotional issues and all his exes are buried in his basement
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 12
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History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/2/2007 10:09:55 PM
I would call her smart


I'm only half as smart...Never Married with Kids
 darkhorse723
Joined: 6/3/2005
Msg: 13
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 7:44:33 AM
I don't pay any attention to never having kids since alot of people with children didn't make a conscious decision to have them, it just happened. I'd also wholeheartedly take a chance on the person that's never been married rather than the one that's been married and divorced umpteen times.
 Pronide
Joined: 4/7/2007
Msg: 14
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 8:27:22 AM
Iv never thought much of it ...either they haven't found the right person, Career has pretty much been their life ....or just hasnt had an interest in being married or having kid's at the moment....its not like its a mandatory thing in everyones life.
 FallsCG
Joined: 3/11/2005
Msg: 15
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 2:30:20 PM
I'd do the happy dance! There appear to so few of us out there!
 schotzimama
Joined: 5/21/2006
Msg: 16
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 5:30:48 PM
I've been married but I never had kids, and I'm 45 years old. I get ALOT of strange looks from people, and I am sure they are assuming alot of things. The truth is that in my mid-twenties I had a miscarriage. Then I was in a lousy marriage and didn't want to bring children into the world while I was in such a bad situation. Now that I am divorced, I feel I am too old to start trying to have children now, and I'm not going to go out looking for a sperm donor to knock me up, especially when there are health risks involved when you are having a child at my age. I always feel like I am having to explain myself to people, and I am really sick of it. I love kids, and I don't mind dating a man who has kids, but in my case, I feel it may be working against me that I never had them, because I am judged unfairly, like I didn't fulfill my obligation as a woman or something, and it hurts. Especially when people are talking about kids, and they leave you out of the conversation. Yes, people make all sorts of assumptions, and they shouldn't. The person who never married either didn't find the right person, was focused on their career, came from a broken home or there could have been any number of reasons. The person who didn't have children could have a number of valid reasons as well. But that doesn't make them bad people. I am glad that alot of people on here understand that. I wish they did in real life.
 Vancer
Joined: 10/29/2006
Msg: 17
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 5:55:14 PM
Isn't this like one of them catch-22 things?!
 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 18
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Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 8:38:41 PM
I'm 43 and a failure becuase I haven't produced a broken home? WTF?

with all due reszpect if you use criteria like this in deciding whether or not to get to know an INDIVIDUAL then you are...consumed by stereotype.
 cartographer
Joined: 7/18/2006
Msg: 19
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Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/3/2007 8:43:19 PM
Assumptions? Honestly. Must everyone marry young only in order to get divorced for marrying too young?
That's another assumption! Really, no assumptions can be made. I'm 35 going to be 36 in June, never have been married, never had children, and it isn't because of anything wrong with me. I've decided, set aside a nice firm foundation to live on. That takes time to do on your own, but once you do, then it makes sense to build from there. Had I married straight out of college, well, maybe I would have never found my dream job. Who knows. But I have no regrets. Those who make the best of their time never should have any regrets. Now that I'm ready, it seems friends are beginning to pop out of the woodworks. It remains to be seen if one of them will want to take me permanently. Cause I'd jump at the opportunity the moment they are ready.
 ~curlygirl~
Joined: 4/22/2006
Msg: 20
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/4/2007 12:09:14 AM
<<< never married, no kids here either. why should it be a bad thing that i didn't carelessly have babies in my teens/twenties, or that I haven't been jaded/broken by an unhappy marriage? i'm happy with who i am, selective about who i want to spend my life with, and i have nothing/no one to hold me back from living my life fully. personally, i think that i'm a better potential partner for someone now than i ever could've been before i hit my 30's. i would think the same of a single man in his 30's who had made similar choices.
 maryrachelle
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 21
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/4/2007 1:46:28 AM
I have never been married and i have no kids. I might like to get married if i could find the right guy for me but i would never get married just for the sake of being married as so many people do . I dont fear being alone . In fact the older i get the more i like it . As for kids NO WAY !!!! I am so glad i never got married in my twenties and as a result had a bunch of whining ,temper tantrum throwing snot nosed brats on my back. Kids are the absolute last thing i need or want.Why should i drag more children into this world when so many other people are willing to do it everyday and without any thought at all as to whether or not the kids wants to be dragged into their particular situation.
 hopefloats77
Joined: 3/30/2007
Msg: 22
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/4/2007 6:28:31 AM
Not really, it's just not their time yet, maybe they haven't met anyone.
 SisterHavana
Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 23
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Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/4/2007 3:07:58 PM
I'm over 30, never married and no kids, so I'd be excited!
 wilder11
Joined: 9/6/2006
Msg: 24
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/5/2007 8:54:19 AM
I'm 40 and never married, no kids. I guess you should make assumptions now. I don't have any kids BECAUSE I haven't been married!!!!! When families were important in this country, people weren't going out having unprotected sex spitting out as many kids as they could without being married. Oh well, I guess I am old fashion and believe a child deserves a mommy and a daddy. On the marriage side of it, I always promised myself that I would not marry unless it had a very very very good chance. Til death do you part.
 blew iis
Joined: 7/27/2006
Msg: 25
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/5/2007 10:30:14 AM
when i see that in a profile i think its rare to have neither one happen to them.
there is many reasons why......if i'm interested i will find out sooner or later as to why.
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