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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a      Home login  
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 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 1
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.Page 1 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
Why do some men find women with brains so intimidating? Some guys actually refuse to date a woman that they think might be smarter than them. They let their over inflated ego get in the way of meeting some really intelligent and confident women.

Which to me is very funny because most women are smarter than the average man. which might explain why so many of us guys are still single.

Under these circumstances i wonder if it would be better for intelligent women to play dumb when they meet one of these morons?

Would any intelligent woman ever do this, act less smart than they really are, just to stroke some guys ego.

Intelligence to me is a very attractive trait in a woman, honestly the outside might be what first attracts me to a woman, but it's what's inside her head that's going to keep me attracted.

Beauty without brain to me is like summer without sunshine.
 Singlemale1962
Joined: 9/21/2006
Msg: 2
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/11/2007 10:47:08 PM
I speak two languages and have an IQ of 180. I dont mind smart women.

Its the dumb ones that bug me.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 3
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 1:05:56 AM
I firmly believe that women are smarter than me, put i also think they are smart enough to know it and have no need to prove it all the time.

I also think that men have bigger egos than women, so it stands to reason that a woman would be totally ok with the guy thinking he is smarter. Women have alot of practice dumbing down.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 4
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 7:12:41 AM
Cardiologist how am i contridicting myself? when i look at a profile online it's usually because of the picture, if i choose to try and connect with that person it's because of what i read in her profile. If i see a woman on the street, The first thing i see is the outside, only after talking to her can i find out about her intelligence. Maybe you need to take those meds.

Nick your point about manipulation is an excellent one. I know that women are way better at manipulation that us men. That's why i am so amused by the thread about women being played i see in the forums all the time, I guess these "players" know the kind of women to go after.

The title of my thread was just supposed to be abit of sarcasm. I don't think any women should have to dummy up just to stroke some guys ego. A man should accept you just the way you're, and if he chooses not to then you need to dump his sorry ass and find one that does.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 7
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 7:42:16 AM
Play dumb to catch a man? (And why do we insist on using the word "catch"?)


They let their over inflated ego get in the way of meeting some really intelligent and confident women.


I think the key word here might be "confident." A smart woman who lacks confidence is the only type of smart woman whom I could see playing dumb in order to attract a man. Why would a smart AND confident woman act stupid in order to meet a moron? If she did, I would seriously have to question how smart she really is, but women who lack confidence will do some fairly rash things.

I wouldn't hide my intelligence or my knowledge. If I attracted a man that way, he would soon bore me. It would be the same as having an old picture on my profile or saying I am thin when I am not--the truth soon outs.
 lindy_3333
Joined: 3/6/2006
Msg: 8
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Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 8:32:01 AM
I am me. Why hide my intellect? Take me or leave me, but I won't deceive anyone. It isn't like I say, "Wow, I am smart!" Nor, do I show off. My intelligence shows with time. But, I see no need to not talk as I always do, on any topic that comes up, no matter who I am with. If I appear "too smart" for the guy, then it's his choice if he wants to continue on. And mine too, for that matter. I might appear smart in some areas, but I am not in all areas. No one is. I love the opportunity to gain more knowledge. We all can learn something from another person. Some men might be intelligent in a variety of areas different than mine.

I guess one needs to define what one means as "intelligent". Intelligent in what area? In running a farm? Or maybe a corporation? How about intelligent in the arts? In raising lamas? Mathematics? Spelling? Or do you think a degree in something makes one "intelligent". In marketing? Owning and running a small business? Selling on EBay?

I guess the real question is do we mesh, all in all, not just in one area. It will take ALL areas to make a relationship work. Being intelligent has no guarantee of success.

I am more concerned about someone’s outlook on life. How do they handle stress? How do they treat me, and others? What do they think of gays, pagans, religion, and politics and other things I find important, before I start judging if someone might be for me? He can’t hate what I find right and good in my life. It would tear us apart in time.

I feel the same way about a guy, as you do a woman, tdh46. Outside looks might be enhanced by what is inside the brain! I have to be able to say that “I can kiss that face,” but the guy doesn’t have to be an Adonis either to make that happen. There are many, many things important to working out a relationship. It isn’t just all about intellect.

If the guy is a moron, then why would I want him anyway?

Linda
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 9
 MallardHunter
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 10
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 9:04:17 AM
Women can't play dumb...

It would be impossible...

They ARE smarter then men...

They own all the pu$$y...that was a smart move
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 11
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 9:24:15 AM
Travelor i really can't see a senario where any intelligent woman playing down her intelligent could be looked at a sexy. your ego must need some really big stroking to see that as sexy.
 Tin_Man
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 12
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 9:43:44 AM
Well... since I am looking for someone in the long term, good looks alone is just not going to cut it. I want someone I can communicate with. That requires some intellect.

Bonus points if they can challenge me, and I them... so we can learn things from each other, and together.

Besides... as was mentioned above... game playing is just not the way for either party to really get what they are looking for... and is something I have no tolerance for.

T_M
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 14
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 11:51:48 AM
Well speaking strictly for myself and how I choose to live MY life, I have no intention of "playing" or "pretending" to be anything other than what I am. Being alone the rest of my life would be a freaking PICNIC,compared to having to put on an "act" to maintain a relationship. The only thing I fear is the wrath of God, which according to the Bible, is the BEGINNING of wisdom.
I would have no RESPECT whatsoever for a man who felt threatened by an intelligent woman.
I'll be the first to tell you I'm real smart about some things and real dumb about others. If I have to conceal either situation to be with a man, that is NOT going to be a relationship that feels like home to me. Why in the WORLD would I want to be in a place that don't feel like home??
Cindy O
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 16
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 12:42:49 PM
Some studies show that women perform better on tests of memory and verbal proficiency for example, while men perform better on tests of mathematical and spatial ability.


I still question the validity of these tests since for centuries, men have been told they are better at math than are women.

Give it a few more generatations, then I would like to see where the scores fall.

And if a man wants a dumb woman, he should get a dumb woman. If he knows she is smart and that she plays dumb to hold on to him, then he is manipulative and suffers from some serious ego problems.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 17
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 2:24:57 PM
How do you explain really intelligent men having relationships with women that's as dumb as a lump of coal. It can't be just about looks because there are some really really beautiful women out there that's also very smart.

If you had identical twins girl, both very beautiful, but one had all the brains and the other was just plain dumb. If i had to bet i would say that the dumb one would be in a relationship way before the intelligent one. why is that?
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 18
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 2:56:14 PM
Verygreeneyes i have a hard time believing you would put a muzzle on your brains for any man. I wonder if he had not come to his senses how long would you have kept up the charade????

I hope the knuckhead did not also try to muzzle that great sense of humor of yours also.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 19
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/12/2007 6:03:50 PM
Very interesting comments. I womder if anywomen would admit to dating guys with no brains? just the male version of the dumb blonde
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 20
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 6:22:05 AM
"If a woman has to play dumb in hopes of getting a man, then she really is stupid and any man that expects that bullsh it isn't worth having. If he is that insecure he really needs theraphy" I could not have said it better myself ny lady
 §püngl䧧
Joined: 3/6/2007
Msg: 21
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 6:54:56 AM
If you 'dumb down' in order to attract someone...what happens after the superficial part is out of the way? I can't see myself doing it...nor would I date someone that was in a totally different league intellectully. I like to be around people that stimulate my mind as well as my other senses!
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 22
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History
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 7:37:55 AM
OP (msg #1):

Beauty without brains to me is like summer without sunshine.


I think this sums it up for me:

"Like a golden ring in the snout of a pig, so is a beautiful woman whose good sense has departed." (Proverbs 11:22)


I find that most women are smarter in general than most men, except in specialised fields.
Men seem better at focussing on one thing at a time.
For example, in my experience, most women (who cook) are better cooks than men, but the majority of cordon bleu chefs are women.

I find most women are smarter than me, and I like it.

But the types of men I meet who want to go out with a woman who is not as smart as them, tend to be intimidated and get very angry if anyone talks about anything other than sport, cars and sex, and even then, only on a level of a 5-year old. I meet a lot of men like that.

coffeeandbooks (msg #14):

Well one thing relationship gurus like to tell men, is to just go ahead and admit they are wrong, even if they don't know what they're wrong about....to just let your woman always be right b/c otherwise you're going to be in the argument forever...Plenty of men who are smarter than the woman they're with AND right about something, but just backed down because they learned the hard way it's easier than pressing the issue.


Thank you so much for that. I will try to keep it in mind in the future.

Nick EuroAthenian (msg #101):

"Play dumb man, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a woman that way."


You could be right.
But do you really want a woman like that, for anything other than sex?
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 24
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 9:53:56 AM
Tinydancer123 i wish you would stop straddling the fence and actually tell us how you feel. For gods sake woman show some back bone and tell us what you're really thinking, none of this sugar coating crap.

All kidding aside, great post.
 DharmaF
Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 25
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History
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 10:14:37 AM
This thread cracks me up! LOL

I loved the part how men need to feel wanted & needed. So I guess us gals are chopped liver & don't 'need' that also?????

You know what I 'need' from a man? I need him to hear me & respect me. So if a man doesn't do that, though I've articulated that to him time & time again, is he 'dumbing down' for me or just dumb? LOL

We could debate this subject until the cows came home & it really wouldn't do a lick of good. It will go back to the same pet peeves that each sex has been complaining about the other for the past umpteen centuries.

Know what truly dumb is? When you have told someone something, continuously & in several different ways, shapes & forms but they don't get it so you walk & then they wonder why.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 26
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 1:32:48 PM
Excellent post east side eddie, makes alot of very interesting points.
 iamasiam
Joined: 2/16/2007
Msg: 27
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Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 2:25:29 PM
Ladies, don't aim to prove yourself, you might get a real man that way.

 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 28
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/13/2007 8:03:13 PM
Latia you're the kind of woman that some moronic guys would feel intimidated by. way to brite for some egos.

But not me, if i was in Calorado i would be on you like ugly on a gorilla. You can talk super intelligent to me anytime and anywhere
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 30
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/14/2007 7:10:33 AM
If a woman is with a man that need her to dumb down for him and his ego. That woman is with the wrong man.
 tdh46
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 31
Play dumb ladies, Don't show how smart u really are, you might get a man that way.
Posted: 5/14/2007 4:59:23 PM
It's interesting that everyone that's posted so far seem to think they have far more intelligence than the persons they date. I think i am the only one so far that's admitted that the women i date are usually smarter that i am.
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