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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Can sex keep you in a relationship?      Home login  
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 JustMe1819
Joined: 12/18/2003
Msg: 1
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Kinda a stupid question but what I mean is, if you are in a relationship with someone and you are having a lot of problems, but the sex is great, should that be one of the deciding factors on whether you should try harder or not? I dont mean that you should stay for just the sex, but it can be very difficult to find someone that you are sexually compatible with. What do you all think!
 junipermoon
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 2
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 6:12:58 PM
if you find someone too annoying, your vagina slams shut and refuses to open.

if it hasn't done that, you're probably ok and the relationship is salvageable.
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 3
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 6:36:46 PM
I was in a relationship like this and I stayed
very long- I will never ever do that again.
That is the only thing that was left of that
relationship- It was bad. Its not worth it - at the end I felt
completely detached from him when we were together-
like nothing. It was not going through the motions feeling
just a feeling of hurt - that I knew when he touched me it was
not because he loved me.
I think everyone is sexually compatable when you find someone
you connect with - I do not believe for a minute you love each other
and the sex sucks- the sex is great because you do love
each other and it comes through.
 Lil Red Riding Hood
Joined: 4/21/2006
Msg: 5
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/25/2007 4:53:41 PM
Yep. Been there done that. The sex was AMAZING but the relationship was full of red flags. I stayed in it for 18 months which was about 15 months too long
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 6
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Re: Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 11/21/2007 2:47:26 PM
So........the answer is that sex can keep you in a relationship for the time being, but lack of sex in a relationship will send you fleeing in a short time.....

Just my opinion........
 svj
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 7
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 11/21/2007 3:15:03 PM
OP: Kinky girl, huh? :yay

Seriously, however... It depends on the sex drives involved.
Yours is obviously quite strong if you're asking that question.

Are said problems permanent or temporary?

Sex, when accompanied by that true animal intimacy, the kind where you can tell what each other is thinking without speaking a word... is one of the strongest bonds two people can share. A bond that can overcome many, many obsticles.

Until you get married... then you're on your own.
(Sorry... single humor.)

Simple down-home good sex isn't much of a biggie... you can find that anywhere.
(Note I would never say this to an average guy.)
So if the problems are more trouble than he's worth... tell him to take a hike.

But if you have that kind of instinctual animal intimacy with him, you should definately take a shot.
But that is very rare. It does not happen in most relationships.

If you do... and if these are permanent issues we're talking about...
You had better address them head on, and be prepare yourself in advance for either eventuality.

The important thing to remember is that you're a team together... not opponents.

It's not a nice thing to say:
Love can be very, very, very strong.
But love does not conquer all.
 pretty greeneyes
Joined: 2/5/2007
Msg: 8
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 11/21/2007 9:04:15 PM
^^^^ I think that can go both ways. If the women feels she is ignored she may look for that in other place. It may not all be about sex but about the closeness that goes with it.
Men maybe they just want "some" if not getting it at home... Both men and women have cheated on the other and they had a good sex life just wanted sex with another.

As for the question.....maybe depends on how good it is??? lol How bad are other things in the relationship? For anything to work must work in all areas not just the bedroom.
 mistressdolly
Joined: 11/28/2007
Msg: 9
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/18/2007 4:26:03 PM
Sex can make people do many a things - including stay in otherwise unsatisfying relationships.

However, there may come a time wherein the person says: "It's just not worth it anymore....."

Mistress Dolly
the original
 nocalsingledad
Joined: 11/27/2007
Msg: 10
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/21/2007 2:14:10 PM

if you are in a relationship with someone and you are having a lot of problems, but the sex is great, should that be one of the deciding factors on whether you should try harder or not?


If you are both finding the other very satisfying sexually but not satisfying in other aspects of the relationship, then the thing to do would be to keep the sex going but otherwise break up. Find someone else for the emotional aspects (and possibly a great sexual experience as well) maybe even someone who will allow you to keep your sexual relationship with that person. That's probably harder to find in some parts of the world than others. But honestly, if my gf came to me and said "the sex with that guy over there is just absolutely mind-blowing ... you know, the one that only comes around once or twice in life" I would suggest that she keep it provided his gf would also allow it.

Situations like that are rare enough in life and some never experience it at all. If I really loved someone, I wouldn't mind allowing them that experience. I mean, it isn't taking anything away from our relationship and in fact might just result in building stronger bonds of love between us. To love someone enough to allow them the experience of drinking fully from life's cup is really saying something. As long as the activities are within reason and responsible, I don't really have an issue with it and having sex once in a while with someone else isn't particularly dangerous or unreasonable, in my opinion. Particularly if it is with the same someone else. Nothing would please me more than for us to get old together and for her to also have her friend for her entire life too.
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 11
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/21/2007 4:31:40 PM
Unfortunately, people (men & women) stay in unhealthy relationships because the sex is so damn good. I think you should leave if someone isn't treating you right. You'll find great hot sex again. You will.
 Seavoyage
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 12
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/23/2007 4:11:01 AM
In my opinion, you have to remember you can be in a good relationship and have great sex. I know what it's like to have so many problems with someone but great sex and not wanting to lose that, but, in the end, the problems will cause you to have some very bad arguments. As far as sexual compatibility, that's an interesting point. He isn't the only man who can please you a lot in bed. So don't stay with him. There have been people with that pleased amazingly in bed, but we don't miss their attitudes toward us.
 adamni
Joined: 11/13/2007
Msg: 13
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/27/2007 3:45:43 PM
My problem is - everything in the relationship is spot on, but sex never happens at all lol - and that doesn't work either
 Ignoble
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 14
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:24:43 AM
Yer damned straight sex can keep me in a relationship. I mean... why would I turn down regular sex? That doesnt compute...
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 15
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 5/1/2008 11:16:55 AM
Sex is very important in a relationship,but you have to have a relationship to keep together lol, does that make sense ?
 bigshrek
Joined: 11/15/2007
Msg: 16
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/15/2008 6:47:04 PM
^^^ +1

Even lousy sex can keep a relationship going...I wasted 3 years on that recently. Kicking myself the whole time. I finally broke free and found a gal that I really connected with on EVERY level...

I remember a gal who had the nickname of Spooky...looked like a DDD version of a grown up Mrs. Addams (Original Version)...mmmmm...the ONLY reason I spent two years with her was the sex...there is much to be said for the kinda gal that could suck the chrome off a Harley...and it's all GOOD!! Unfortunately it was just a physical thang...and I was under 25 yrs...and we all know how guys think when they are under 25...
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 17
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/15/2008 10:35:01 PM
I stayed way too long in a crazy relationship, partly out of fear of being alone but a lot because the sex was so good. Most often, a bad relationship causes a deterioration in sex but this was one case where that was the one thing that really worked. Thank God I finally saw my way out of it, though. It wasn't worth it. My life is so much calmer since then and I've managed to find some very good partners without all the insanity.
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