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 bestwomanever
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 1
People who just write "how are you" Page 1 of 78    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
Does anyone else find it kind of annoying to receive an email and all it says is "how are you?" and nothing else? I don't know, it just seems to me that, if you're going to send an email, at least write more than one phrase. I don't know, what do you think? Guys, if you've done this, I'd suggest you stop, it's pretty annoying.
 bestwomanever
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 2
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 4:14:51 PM
LOL Daca, I do the same thing. And Cheekerzzz, good observation of the other poster, lol. And getting a "fancy a chat" might not be that bad actually. I've never gotten one of those before. :)
 ladybama2005
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 3
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 4:17:21 PM
i think for some that is away to break the ice as they say . so why not just check out their profile and if you dont like it delete and move on but if you like then hey that means his ( how are you ? ) worked . so why not give all they guys a break they are just trying to be nice....... try it some times it makes you feel good when you get a reply saying ( thanks for asking i am fine ) and who knows you might just put a smile on some ones face....
 RAZ49
Joined: 2/10/2004
Msg: 4
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 5:11:57 PM
What I have found is I can either write a lengthy email talking about things in her profile or a short "Hi" and it doesn't seem to matter, I still don't get a reply. I have come to the conclusion the women on here are playing games and not really wanting to meet some one or they expect the guy to be perfect even though they are far from it too. I know it sounds bitter and that might be so but when you have sent a couple hundred emails and had less than 10 replies you tend to get that way. My point is, just be glad you get emails and stop being so picky!
 wizardofossington
Joined: 6/17/2007
Msg: 5
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 6:52:03 PM
First I just want to say to everybody on this thread "HOW ARE YOU? " I hope everybody is doing good. This is a very interesting topic and I wonder why people do those "how are you?' bids. It just drives me crazy, you know what I mean?
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 6
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 6:57:29 PM
Yes, I have to say it annoys me as well. I think my profile makes it pretty clear I'm looking for someone with a tiny bit of intellectual level. Just saying "hi" or "how are you" or "liked your profile" isn't enough to get a conversation going with me or impress me. At least take a minute to tell me what it was you liked about my profile and found me interesting. If you can't do that much then I pretty much assume you're just emailing me because I had breasts and said I was single. :D

I have to say though, I was extremely impressed the other day when I got an email from a guy that said "I see you played Evil Stevie's Pirate game on Saturday at Origins" after I had posted a picture of myself with a lego pirate ship. I did respond to that one.
 Thatguy67
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 7
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 6:57:51 PM
freebird78: How are you?
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 8
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 7:17:12 PM

Seeing how the majority of women do not respond to your messages anyway what is the point of sending a long message? When someone messages you with a short message such as "Hi or How are you" they are just testing the waters to see if you will check out their picture and read their profile and of course, respond. When I first came on this site I sent long introductory messages. No responses came. It was just a complete waste of time. Now I only send messages that are one sentence. If you decide to take the time to respond to me you will find that my message length increases. It really is that simple. Respond back and that tells me it is okay to write to you and discuss any topic we so wish to pursue.


Why do you have to write something long? Just say "I see you're into gaming and so am I".

Make it personal, not a novel.
 GuitarGuy_
Joined: 3/15/2007
Msg: 9
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 7:28:17 PM
"How are you" would be a good opening, or a half decent opening. But if thats it where do you go from there. On the plus side, at least it's PROBABLY not cut and pasted.


:)
 Adattude
Joined: 8/23/2006
Msg: 10
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 7:35:50 PM
I don't understand what people expect from this site. It's like to get someones attention you either need to be amazingly good looking or be able to start some deep conversation within the first email. Lighten up people... try being human and answering the question. Was your day good or bad, did anything interesting happen, was it a usual routine day and if so what did it consist of. It's pretty simple. Maybe in your answer something will make the other person light up and then a real conversation can start. This dating thing is not rocket science, but people always make it out to be! RELAX MORE!
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 11
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 7:47:03 PM

Lighten up people... try being human and answering the question

"Hi" is not a question. :)


Was your day good or bad, did anything interesting happen, was it a usual routine day and if so what did it consist of.

I'm sorry, but I don' t know you and the honest answer to that question is not one that I would give to a stranger. I'm not into meaningless chit chat and it just feels rather fake and untrue to who I am to say "I had a good day, how about you?" what are you really going to learn from that conversation?


It's like to get someones attention you either need to be amazingly good looking or be able to start some deep conversation within the first email.

Telling someone why you picked their profile over 50 others is not a deep conversation, it's flattering and polite.
 Silver Sharpie
Joined: 8/8/2005
Msg: 12
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 7:52:15 PM
Funny I have had people send me a note that says "Hi" and thats it.. nothing else..

so I reply with Hi also..

I never hear from them again.. LOLOL.. hey I give what I get..


That's what happened to me, except her exact words – oops word – was "hello."
 Adattude
Joined: 8/23/2006
Msg: 13
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:07:15 PM


"Hi" is not a question. :)


No it's not, but guess what... "how are you?" is which is what this thread is about.



I'm sorry, but I don' t know you and the honest answer to that question is not one that I would give to a stranger. I'm not into meaningless chit chat and it just feels rather fake and untrue to who I am to say "I had a good day, how about you?" what are you really going to learn from that conversation?


What are you working for a government agency? Hell I'll post the answer to that question right here. My day was pretty good, had to go to work a little early due to a big title being released but other than that I spent the day planning for my new store and then hung out and had a few beers with my buddies. See what you learn from that? Plenty to start a convo with.
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 14
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:08:05 PM
First of all, this isn't a bar. I didn't see your eyes, I didn't see the expressions on your face or body language you used or hear the inflection of the tone in your voice. This is an online forum where communication is 100% required. In person and up close you can get away with a little less words and in depth topics. You don't know anything about me in a bar other than what I look like and how you see me interacting with others. Here I have told you a lot about who I am in a profile so you have more to go with in a starter conversation. You had the benefit of knowing if we actually had anything in common (and even if I was married and what type of relationship I was looking for) before you introduced yourself to me on this site.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 15
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:09:22 PM
Lpbrian, maybe one of the reasons that a lot of men fail to get responses is because they write 'how are you.' Someone likes to know that their profile has been read and that someone might have spent more than 30 seconds writing an e-mail.

Some people are shy and do not know what to say, others see an e-mail box in the same way they do a blank sheet of paper when they are trying to write a term paper. An enormous amount of space that they have no idea how to fill up. If you don't like it, write the same thing back and see what happens. Or, read/delete works too.
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 16
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:11:34 PM

What are you working for a government agency? Hell I'll post the answer to that question right here. My day was pretty good, had to go to work a little early due to a big title being released but other than that I spent the day planning for my new store and then hung out and had a few beers with my buddies. See what you learn from that? Plenty to start a convo with.

Well actually I work in IT. Just like many other people in profesional environments, talking abut your job and what you did is taboo. I work in a secured environment because it is a financial institution.

But what did I learn about you from that conversation? Nothing. You still haven't told me if we have anything in common. You still haven't actually told me why we're talking. Okay... I know you have friends (or so you claim) and that you drink. Sorry, maybe if you read my profile it would make more sense?
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 17
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:16:43 PM
And just one last question Adattude... why is it so difficult to pay a woman a compliment and tell her why you picked her? It tells me that you actually bothered to read my profile before contacting me. Flattery will get you everywhere after all. :) Too many times I feel as if the guy didn't even read a word I said.
 Adattude
Joined: 8/23/2006
Msg: 18
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:20:48 PM

And just one last question Adattude... why is it so difficult to pay a woman a compliment and tell her why you picked her? It tells me that you actually bothered to read my profile before contacting me. Flattery will get you everywhere after all. :) Too many times I feel as if the guy didn't even read a word I said


Flattery will do nothing but inflate a girls ego. I give flattery when it is earned and it is not earned by a blurb in a profile. I need to speak to and get to know the person before I will compliment them... unless you mean physically in which "nice eyes" is so cliche
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 19
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:29:31 PM

Well from what your profile seems to show me is that your a techie with bad social skills which is why you find it hard to talk to people online.

Wow, so you've decided you have a need to throw slams at me instead of actually communicating back? And who has the bad social skills? Interesting. :) Remind me to never show you my cherrytap page where I have 2300 friends and 1053 fans.

Yes, we clearly come from two different sides. Which is exactly why we would never be compatable. Some people are into meaningless chit chat that goes on for hours and never actually getting to know someone. Then there are others like myself that don't believe in wasting 7 days going back and forth in email to find out if we have anything in coomon. Honestly, I have a lot better things to do with my time. I'm looking for a relationship and not a chat buddy. My profiles does state "long term relationship"
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 20
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 9:02:03 PM
LastGd1Left, I find it interesting that you seem to be surprised we want more than just a "hello" when you yourself said "Conversation is really important if theres to be a real connection so if its long term you want than it's what will keep me."

No one is saying write a book or a novel. It doesn't require 5 paragraphs for me to say "hey, I really like your profile and enjoy going to concerts as well. Why don't we talk and find out if we have more in common some time?"
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 21
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 9:06:57 PM
~OP~ You made me laugh. I not only get those ~ I get a lot of these:





Etc. Like I'm supposed to respond to that? I do respond. Usually with this:

or even

Men of few words are great ~ but smileys.........seriously now. Sigh.
 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 22
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 9:08:11 PM
Let me share with you emails I have received that are more likely to get a response from me:

"I wanted to compliment you on your profile. You are very intelligent and down to earth. Your writing reflects well on how you think and how you feel."

"I see you played Evil Stevie's Pirate Game at Origins"

"I really enjoyed your profile, what type of galleries to you like to go to when you go to gallery hop?"

"How many years have you been going to Gencon? How did you get started in gaming?"

"How long have you been playing WoW?"

I don't think any of those are really over complicated or even took that much effort. But they did tell me that the person actually took some time to see who I as and what I had to say did matter. :)
 RAZ49
Joined: 2/10/2004
Msg: 23
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People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 9:26:53 PM
"And just one last question Adattude... why is it so difficult to pay a woman a compliment and tell her why you picked her? It tells me that you actually bothered to read my profile before contacting me. Flattery will get you everywhere after all. :) Too many times I feel as if the guy didn't even read a word I said."





I have done that so many times and it was a big waste of time, they still didn't reply so you get tired of doing that and start making it simple just to see if you get a reply. If a woman is offended by a "Hi" or "how are you" then I don't want to be around her anyway.
 bestwomanever
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 24
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 10:49:26 PM
It's good to know that other women on here get where I'm coming from. Some guys are just so black and white on here. They're assuming that, just because we want more than 3 words, it means we want a novel. I do appreciate every email I get and take it as a compliment. I've just had enough of the illiterate So Cal guys for one lifetime, so am always a little disappointed whenever I enounter yet another one.
And Sherilyn, I agree with you 100%. I hope you don't let the losers like Attetude and Lastgd1left (qite ironic usernames, actually) offend you. They are clearly bitter and hate women a lot to lash out so much and it's obvious why they are still single. Pretty scary how violent with their words they are actually. Makes one scared to encounter either of them in real life.
 Tim0066
Joined: 7/2/2007
Msg: 25
People who just write how are you
Posted: 7/17/2007 11:14:41 PM
Limited typing skills maybe?

They are trolling for replies, send 100 get at least 5 replies, of those they probably have a standard cut and paste follow up.

You should reply

"I'm single, DUH!"


There are a LOT of women who's profiles leave very little to comment on, I find them sort of boring right from the start and won't even send an email even of they are very attractive and fit all the basic interests for me. I want to be impressed by a woman, not bored... its not a great way to start.
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