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Joined: 4/19/2006
Msg: 1
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I've dated a guy for 2 months now. I really like him and he is easy to talk to but he really never says much about his life. He has only taken me to dinner once & I've never been inside his large home, since he says it's too dirty and he's never unpacked all the boxes since his move 2 yrs ago.

We always end up eating at my apartment and have great sex...that is all. Then he leaves me.

What should I do or ask of him, because I don't know what he really feels about me for the long term, even though he says he loves me, I don't know what kind of love he is thinking. I want a life partner, not just sex every day....How should I move this relationship beyond sex only. I want to get out more and do more things. He always tells me to tell him, if I want to do something. He never suggests anything himself.

I'm getting tired of just sex, which is great...but I want a life partner and other things, like travel, going shopping together, going to music shows, movies, etc with my partner.

Is he only really just wanting sex with me and that is all....Guys, tell me what you think..thanks
Joined: 9/20/2005
Msg: 2
sex only
Posted: 7/21/2007 12:43:33 AM
Says he loves you but won't share about his life or his home with you? hmm yep..sad to say, but there is slim chance this guy is looking for anything long term except an F-buddy. If you desire more from life..then I think you know the answer..
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 3
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sex only
Posted: 7/21/2007 5:49:25 PM
I am not a guy but to me sound like he is marryed and playing games with you,I would come out and ask him whats up ? what is it youwant a f, buddy or what ? then you have to ask yourself what is it you want?
Joined: 7/10/2005
Msg: 4
sex only
Posted: 7/24/2007 10:22:13 AM
Why make it more complicated than what it is? If it's what he wants, move on with it. If it's not what he wants, move away from it. If it's what he wants, and doesn't pursue it, then he's lazy... and move on from it. Is there something "so" special about him that you are with him? Cause I didn't see anything positive come out of anything you said.
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 5
sex only
Posted: 7/24/2007 10:19:25 PM
I agree with "bets": this guy is most likely married ("house is too dirty?" Oh, COME ON!). Also, if he doesn't ever take you anywhere, it's a pretty good indication he's wary of running into someone!
Ask if you can help clean up the new house because you'd "love to see it!" and/or if he would take you to a popular restaurant, etc. I can pretty much tell you right now that, no, you can't help with the house, and, no he can't take you to that restaurant because (yep!) "(his) house is too dirty!"
Good luck! You're an attractive woman. There're plenty of men who'd kill for an opportunity to spend some time with you!
Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 6
sex only
Posted: 7/25/2007 7:55:49 PM
Kinda sounds fishy to me too, but looking at my present living situation I could see me giving out an excuse that might sound fishy too (but wouldnt really be...but thats a different subject).

Next time, tell him you want to go out. Pick a place close to where he lives, one that is very public. Dont take no for an answer. If he's got someone else (or is married) then I'm willing to bet his true colors will show soon enough.

As for it the house being too dirty...well been there done that and there can be an embarassment factor that keeps one from having company over. Shouldnt be any reason not to take you out to dinner, shopping, movies or anything else if he truly loves you...and you'd think he'd even be the one to suggest something after awhile.

Without knowing more about you or sounds more like just sex to me.
Joined: 5/4/2007
Msg: 7
sex only
Posted: 7/29/2007 2:54:18 AM
I would venture to say that this guy is hiding something, like a wife.... he's probably
separated from her. Have fun while you can, if that's what floats your boat.
However, if it's the real thing you're looking for, don't hold your breath while waiting on this guy.
Joined: 7/7/2007
Msg: 8
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sex only
Posted: 8/5/2007 5:30:35 AM
Happy? The first thing is to decide what YOU want. Then communicate that to him. If you want to have more, tell him so. I suggest you tell him and ask him what you just asked us. I think a man should be proud to take you out, and be seen with you. Is he so insecure he wants to keep you away from others?

good luck, I hope you are pleased with the way it turns out.
Joined: 9/28/2006
Msg: 9
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sex only
Posted: 8/8/2007 5:52:02 PM
Are you joking ???You can not fiqure this out???You are being used!!!!! Duh!!! I got some ocean front property here in Olathe for sale!!! Cheap!!
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 10
sex only
Posted: 11/7/2007 6:48:43 AM
My guess is he doesn't invite you over because his wife would claw your and his eyes are being used and selling yourself short. Thisk about it? Would you want your daughter in this kind of relationship with someone who only cares about one dimention of who you are? My advice would be to cut him off and see where his interests really are.
Joined: 8/5/2007
Msg: 11
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sex only
Posted: 11/18/2007 7:09:54 PM
Or he lives with his parents still.
Joined: 3/19/2007
Msg: 12
sex only
Posted: 11/24/2007 12:34:22 PM
I have a question for you do you know where he livesIf so show up at his house if not follow him home BUT do not knock on his door.He sounds like his allready got someone.Make sure you know all the info you need before you move past just sex.
Joined: 8/5/2007
Msg: 13
sex only
Posted: 12/1/2007 7:07:36 PM
One of the most powerful weapons women have is intutition, Use it hon, if you suppect something is not on the up and up, then your probably right.
Joined: 9/3/2007
Msg: 14
sex only
Posted: 12/14/2007 6:40:43 PM
I'm with the turn up unannounced idea. If he's being shady, he'll be pissed off and you'll know. Maybe he's just a reclusive hermit who likes to keep to himself and needs someone to show him what he's missing out on.
Joined: 2/2/2007
Msg: 15
sex only
Posted: 12/17/2007 3:27:32 PM
Open his glove box and look at his insurance card... if there is only him, continue, if there is a female on the insurance card with him, drop the dime...
sex only
Posted: 2/18/2008 11:05:03 AM
I've ran into this thing before with some of my female friends. Now, the fact that he thinks his place is too dirty, might not mean anything more than that. As was mentioned earlier, there is a certain embarrassment factor that might be keeping him from being willing to have you over. However, it certainly could be that he is hiding something. Other than a messy house. I would go with the above advice and test him. Try getting him to take you to a place close to where he lives, you'll likely see from his reaction whats up. Or, you could always ask to meet his parents. That always works with these sorts of things.
Joined: 2/3/2008
Msg: 17
sex only
Posted: 2/19/2008 5:46:18 AM
just looking at your photo most men would take you home or stay at you home you are so pretty. if i were going with you i would want to be with you all the time because you have the looks and if you get along also who would want to be away from you very long don
Joined: 12/15/2005
Msg: 18
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sex only
Posted: 9/10/2008 12:00:05 PM
hhhhhmmmm sounds kind of fishy to me. You mean to tell me that his place is still to dirty after 2 years. Is he that much of a lazy bum. What kind of a job does he hold now. Surely nothing important then.
You need to dump this man and find you a real man dear. One that is willing to take you places and do things together, like going to movies, going on picnics, art and craft fairs, ect. ect. ect. one who is willing to take you to his place and then show you some really good sex.
Joined: 11/16/2005
Msg: 19
sex only
Posted: 9/15/2008 5:44:53 PM
Yes he only really just wants sex with you,He may be married,Let me tell you ;he is one lucky man to have you
Joined: 12/15/2008
Msg: 20
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sex only
Posted: 12/20/2008 5:21:06 AM
The better question is, why did you give it up so soon, without seeing his house before, I mean his LARGE House. You have set the standards of it, and yours, now you want to change them, better think about it before the next guy.
 Mustang Cool
Joined: 9/22/2008
Msg: 21
sex only
Posted: 12/22/2008 2:52:38 AM
The most important thing you can have in a relationship of any kind is tha abilty to talk about anything and I mean anything. So I say looking him in the eyes and ask him whats going on, and if he says, nothing, then you tell him you want him to leave and he is only to come back if he wants to open up and talk if not then stay gone and oh ya, you will pick from now on where you go to eat at and the two of you will have dinner at his house at least once a week and you will pick the day, thats what I think you should do.
But I also think he wants you for a peice of a__ only and if that is gone then he will be as well.
Good luck, you will need it.
Joined: 5/2/2008
Msg: 22
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sex only
Posted: 1/3/2009 1:05:51 PM
ok if workes for u go with it do u trust hi? do u fill safe? by the way got any friends lol
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 23
sex only
Posted: 1/21/2009 8:09:57 PM
MARRIED!!!! thats all there is to it, if he loves you he would already have told you he lived with parents, he's married. it sounds negative and judgemental, but been there done that, he's married. if he's embarrased about a dirty house and he's into you he would clean it.
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 24
sex only
Posted: 1/29/2009 8:50:13 PM
He is using you. I had a guy do this recently. He took me to dinner, ate as fast as he could. We came back to my home. We had sex, he jumped up and went home spouting some stupid reason. While we were eating he was looking at his cell phone behind my back. I saw him do this and he tried to tell me some story about the people behind me moving a coat or something. He didn't call after that for about a month and then he tried to apologize but I know he really is just wanting sex. Not what I want. Dump this loser before you get hurt.
Joined: 12/15/2008
Msg: 25
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sex only
Posted: 2/10/2009 4:11:43 PM
I have news for all you women it’s what motivates all men, and you know that that’s why you all keep us in line with it. You set the pace, of it all. Iit’s our job to ask, it’s yours to say no! That is unless you want to say yes. I cannot believe you are trying at your age to act surprised.
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