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Show ALL Forums  > Poems And Quotes  > Fragments from a purple heart.....      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 1
Fragments from a purple heart.....Page 1 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Thought I would start my own thread. Hope that others will contribute. It will help me to group all my writings together

When I started in here I thought I was so lost I could never find myself again. Through writing and sharing my thoughts I am slowly piecing these fragments back together.....I have started with 3 I liked from other threads.

Thank you to all that have shared and commented on my thoughts.

Deep richness and warmth.
The color purple flows
filling hearts and loving
a soft kindness wraps her

Her heart swells with love
to stop the sadness in all
not to talk and advise
but listen and hear

The pain of a thousand
broken hearts she bears
not just her own but others
as she guides them through the haze

The moon is her mother
her renewing of her soul
but her mother has left her
draining the strength

So she wanders lost
in a requiem mass of pain
the path now darkened
she cannot see her way

Black and blacker
she aches for purple
that soft, lover of love
Lost...and alone

Tearful that day,
on which will rise from ashes
guilty man for judgment.
So have mercy, O God, on this person.
Compassionate Lord Jesus,
grant them rest. Amen


Dies Irae....
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 2
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/3/2007 8:31:38 PM
Quietly. She sits. The souls of her sisters
filling her veins with silver moonlight.
The memories of her life cascade through
her mind as she sips her chardonnay.

The man that died. The true and good love.
The one who gave precious life.
And left her to raise a man.
She can hear the echo of his love.

The two who left their marks
on her body and her mind.
Black and blue and purple.
The bruises faded with time.

Her heart full and whole
with love for her flesh and blood
as slowly one by one
they drain it empty.

She hides. Cries and breaks.
Heals and fills her heart again
slowly mending it from
its thousand fractured pieces

It becomes soft and gentle once more
she forgives and trusts again
as one by one they shatter
it over and over again

And he. The last one
she trusted with it.
Her soft bleeding heart.
Shatters it in her hands.

Now she sits. Older and wiser?
No, the tears flow. Alone again.
only the souls of her sisters
see them drown her.

And they sigh....and join her.....
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 3
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/3/2007 8:36:43 PM
I put my heart in my pocket
hid it from every eye
but you saw it hiding in there
wooed me with honeyed words

I slowly pulled it out
held it gently in my hands
feelings flowing
and showed it, beating, to you

a soft true heart
gossamer threads of love
streaming from all around it
and gave it to you

I can still feel your kiss
turning my body to fire
your breath on my skin
making me come alive

We share a song, a meal
we laugh, then cry
and you held me close
like you would never let me go

You were my shelter
my lover...my home
and I basked in your warmth
your touch...your smile

But now I walk alone
a hollow shell once more
I hold my heart in my hands again
black and broken

The purple threads of pain
now drip from my fingers
like acid burning my soul
and I am numbed

Shelter me....I have no home.....
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 4
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/3/2007 9:36:34 PM
I lay still in the darkness
listening to the music wash over me
swirling and mixing with my sadness
the pain almost too much to bear

I am alone, so alone
it engulfs my senses
and worms its way into my core
freezing and numbing all in its path

The tears a sweet release
oh! I can feel them running
soaking my skin
turning into a river

I close my eyes and I see you
and I know I could be there
my body entwined with yours
your sweet nothings in my ear

You are not sure that you want me
or sure enough to say goodbye
So I am in limbo for you
longing for your touch

If I was to run to you
you would caress my aching heart
calm my troubled mind
I want that all the time

But if I am not there
I hear nothing
except the sound of my loneliness
screaming out your name

I tell myself to be strong
end it this day
but when you touch me
I can't say those words

The words I need to say
I type them, text them
but never a reply from you
Is this a kind of game?

I can remember your sweet words
you told me to stay
your touch, your kiss
slowly melting my frozen heart

Then I gave it to you
and the words stopped
the looks, the wanting me
as I shared my thoughts with you

Things I had never told another
I told to you that night
and I cried when I heard that song
and you held me till the tears stopped

It was like the old saying
be careful what you wish for
you just may get it.
You wished. You got it.

Now you don't want it....
And you push me aside
Are you scared to face those feelings?
you buried deep inside?

You can't take someones heart
and give it back to them
when the feeling takes you
It is given freely and with love

But love makes a fool of me
time and time again
until I am left empty
and alone....
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 5
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 1:37:04 AM
How can I stop hurting?
how could I have been so wrong?
I thought this was worth giving you my heart
so why do I cry another night?

My heart making my chest ache
how many tears can one body hold?
I touched you tonight
and it was like you were a stranger

Perhaps it is just me?
I can't shut off or shut down
these feelings that I have for you
So how can I stop them?

I was so strong just now?
didn't let you see my pain
we talked about other things
then I just left

When I really wanted so many other things
your kiss, your touch
the way you used to look at me
you didn't even do that

Please tell me if you want me to go
I could move past that
it is this limbo that takes my sanity
and what I feel for you

Am I holding onto something
that is not there for you?
But it is real for me and
I can't seem to stop what I feel

So please love me....
Or let me go....
Please don't kiss me again
if its not me you want....
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 6
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 5:52:19 AM
Thought i would share my username

Lacrymosa - Evanescence

Out on your own
cold and alone again
can this be what you really wanted, baby?

Blame it on me
set your guilt free
nothing can hold you back now

Now that you're gone
I feel like myself again
grieving the things I can't repair and willing ...

to let you blame it on me
and set your guilt free
I don't want to hold you back now love

I can't change who I am
not this time, I wont lie to keep you near me
and in this short life, there's no time to waste on giving up
my love wasn't enough

and you can blame it on me
just set your guilt free, honey
I don't want to hold you back now love
 likes_a_laugh
Joined: 3/17/2007
Msg: 7
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 6:37:45 AM
Hey there Lacry... give it time and it'll heal... promise...

Purple entwined with crimson
bleeding so deep, deep within
sinews strained with anxiety
breathing now laboured by tears

Drawing the curtains brings darkness
streaming in, filling the room
even the light switch does nothing
the walls close in slowly but sure

When will the light come and find me
when will the lungs fill with air
somehwere a sunrise is happening
O when will that somewhere be here...
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 8
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 7:00:02 AM
Oh Likesa....

That was so beautiful it made me cry (again lol)

Thank-you for your thoughts.
 bicpen
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 9
view profile
History
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:00:18 AM
Hi lacrymosa:

I haven't read all your posts yet, but every line I read seems to flow with a loveliness that makes me think of a weeping Virgin Mary.
 Wicked Wabbit
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 10
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:29:52 AM
I have read each and every poem....takes me back in time truly....to a place of blackness where I dwelled for many years. Constantly seeking that place of pastel colours where there would be some type of warmth offered to a weary soul. I am not sure where you are now in your journey "lacrymosa"....but I can only say that again a light shall shine.

I enjoy your writes immensely...great feeling..and I shall return to add one of my own, if you don't mind?
 Jules-4u
Joined: 8/26/2006
Msg: 11
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 11:10:00 AM
Magnificent! my friend....enjoyed every one! Looking forward to more....wishing you much pleasure....with each one....a release! hugs jules!

Mountains....not higher
Life no worse for the most
Incredible meaning now....
I enjoy every moment!

Clearing the trees ....
now to see the true picture
Enjoying the breath of fresh air
cool ...clean water!
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 12
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 5:59:47 PM
bicpen, wicked wabbit & jules

Thank-you my new friends for your kind words. Please feel free to contribute anytime. I love all of your writings!

I found here in this little place
A haven to shield my heart
where my feelings escape
and are heard by other hearts

Hearts that have known the pain mine has
and who don't tell me to "get on with it"
but encourage me to feel these things
explore them all and heal

Hearts from all over the world
good and strong and true
who feel my pain not shun it
and offer wisdom and love

 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 13
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 6:48:52 PM
I often wonder
if it is good to feel this much
perhaps I should bury them
not show them to the world

For they only cause me pain
a pain so intense and open
it transverses time and space
baring my soul to all

But if I stopped them coming
I wouldn't feel the pure joy
of something sweet and pure
making my happiness shine

And I would be scared to embrace love
weave it and give it away
with my heart combined
a special gift for those who receive it

Or to experience the strength
of all my sisters before me
their wisdom an almanac
of listening to grief and sadness

To take that burden from others
is a special gift indeed
to ease them through their pain
and lead them from the darkness

So I think that I won't hide them
I will show them to the world
listening, loving, sharing, caring
for that is the me I can't change

My feelings now are sadness
wounded and in pain
on a merry-go-round of love
I can't shut them down

So in this time of my sadness
please be kind to me
gentle and understanding
I feel broken and confused
 Wicked Wabbit
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 14
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 7:45:24 PM
Many hearts around you
have been on a path of pain
coming here to let my wounds be exposed
has been to my healing gain

Letting that grief fly
through words upon a page
many days has been a gift
for me to release my inner rage

Never fear of letting your heart show
free your inner soul of what has hurt you deep
you begin this process now
as upon this page your words so creep

Reach out to others
who you feel having a caring soul
trust that we have been there to
aiding you to brightness will become our goal

Know you are not alone
reach out when you are in need
amazing what within these pond waters you will find
again to health soon your soul will be freed.
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 15
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 8:36:45 PM
Thank you for your (as always) beautiful words Wicked Wabbit

It is healing to release your innermost thoughts and feelings into words on a page.

And every hour of every day you can see a little purple returning.....

Virus

This virus invades my body
draining all my energy
sapping all my strength
taking my womanly curves

My physical so tired
all I have left is thoughts
whirling in my mind
screaming in my head

My feelings bare for all to see
as the virus takes my soul
stripping it naked
exposed to the world

And so it whirls and cavorts
through my whole being
changing my life and love
until I am searching for who I am

I am not the one you knew and loved
Just a pile of thoughts and feelings
in an empty body shell
with no structure or point

As I start my new journey
at a late point in my life
the virus laughs inside me
thinking it has won

I will not let it erase me
nor take my heart and soul
my feelings or my love
they are who I am

Virus do your best
dip your claws in my blood
I will not succumb to you
for you shall be my friend

I shall embrace you in my veins
live with you inside my blood
I fight you no more
and absorb you into me
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 16
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 9:00:13 PM
Just posted this in another thread but wanted to bring it "home" with me...

I always chose the jerks
you know those guys?
The ones who woo you
quick and intense?

Those guys that declare their love
in the first five minutes?
Then expect you to serve them
body mind and soul

The ones that hit you hard
then say It was you?
I had a few of them
But they "loved" me

So I made a promise to myself
after the last jerk
that I would find someone different
and I did, a nice guy.

So slowly I gave him my mind
my body, heart and soul
and he took it all nicely
softly and slowly

He worked long hours
and did many things for his friends
I thought "how nice"
and yeah, he fitted me in

But when I started to do those things
tell him how much he excited me
and how much I cared
and just liked being with him

He accepted them at first
and I started to dream again
hope and release my frozen heart
Not wanting anything but love

But I will let you in on a little secret
Nice guys can be jerks
they get so caught up in being nice
and helping people out

That when someone loves them
with all their heart and soul
they don't have to help you
just give themselves to you

They don't know how to do it
and they push you aside
to "help" the next person who asks
but they do it in a nice way

So this is for the nice guys
stop looking for the one
see what is in front of you
It may be what you wished for

Be careful what you wish for....
You may just get it......
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 17
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/4/2007 9:33:54 PM
Time

Tick, tick, tick the clock says
mocking me, with its laughing face
dragging each tick out like it is an eternity
in the mid afternoon of the warm day

I sit alone, just my keyboard
no calls from those who care
and with each tick, tick of the mocking clock
no call from you, the call I ache for

I start to feel the pain leeching its way into me
and I know that the night will soon come
cloaking me in its velvet darkness
letting the ache spread while no-one can see

Each minute seems like an eternity
but I want to hold back the approaching night
Those hours of darkness and the moon
that strangely comfort, but destroy my soul

Those minutes last forever dragging their feet
prolonging each moment of grief and pain
raking my soul with their sharp claws
and my thoughts fill with holding you close

Oh! How I miss that closeness, togetherness
skin on skin, entwined like snakes
emotions rushing and enveloping us
until we two become one for a few moments

Falling asleep in your arms, your breath on my cheek
feelings of safe, strong and shelter in their strength
I sleep a dreamless sleep, no longer demon nightmares
invade my thoughts until I wake screaming

So the nightfall brings its dread with it
like a box from pandora's shop
and I glare at my empty bed, knowing that when I crawl in
the nightmares will come to wake me again

The haven of you is not there, your arms are empty
as is my heart and soul without you
so the demons will devour my dreams again
my screaming will resume to haunt my sleep

And I will awaken to begin another day
tick, tick, tick, the clock says
mocking me, with its laughing face
dragging each tick out like it is an eternity......
 alwaysDreaming2
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 18
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 1:26:51 AM
^^^Time has become my enemy....but I still remember how to put some words together? ....

I don’t define alone anymore
Am content in me and the voice of the Lord
I struggle to understand man
Even my own words are without defence
Said without intent of distress


Now I wake up
Foggy from the dreams
I remember what it was to love
..Unconditionally


Throwing the doona aside
How stupid am I…I’ve got to make the bed
Again, again and again
There’s a promise of a coffee if I make it to the door
My sweet children
Mother’s changed her mind
She no longer takes sugar
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 19
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 3:51:35 AM
AnotherAwakening....

Welcome and as usual....inspiring!

Thank you for your lovely contribution!
 aoibheann
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 20
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 7:27:05 AM
loved this one anotherawakening

"i've got to make the bed again and again and again"

time IS the enemy
because you get to
a point where
the rumples can't
be smoothed out
the mattress
starts to sag
the frame can
only creak and
groan and all
that is in the
cupboard is
sweet and low
lower, lowest
 aoibheann
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 21
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 7:35:10 AM
lacrymosa

very hard for me to comment
too close to your pain
the shadows lure me
always
the greyest day
full of rain
my only respite
i can hide in the
clouds of my
memories
the silence
unbroken
i took down
the clock
i disconnect
the phone that
never rings
i've even stopped
praying
there is nothing
to ask for
there is nothing
i deserve
 Lacrymosa
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 22
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:43:36 AM
aoibheann

You deserve many happy time and loves.
My sister in the skin
The clock will resume its ticking
and you shall find the the shadows fade

Reconnect the phone
the calls will come again
embrace your memories
they will break your silence

Pray to the goddesses
They will hear your call
and strong women will surge
sending you strength and hope

We are never truly alone
especially in this place
They will help to heal our hearts
And make us see we DO deserve.....all


 aoibheann
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 23
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 9:08:40 AM
,
,
,
,
,
,

these tears so tiny
this pain so large
 Jules-4u
Joined: 8/26/2006
Msg: 24
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 9:15:29 AM
aoibheann....why would you think you are not worthy nor deserving? Empathy begins at home....give yourself some!

Forgive yourself for what ever it is.....
I forgive you...and I don't even know you!
Have humanity for yourself....
Then give it to others....
First you must give yourself the first gift!
Life is hard enough....and if we carry hate for ourself
The candle....will burn....and eventually burn out
No longer the wick will be standing up, about
With each little pain...we have lived...we must bury
With each day....life is a lesson in the making!
Take tomorrow and give it the full potential....
Know that we all have our caverns ...some buried!

 aoibheann
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 25
Fragments from a purple heart.....
Posted: 8/5/2007 9:17:30 AM
lacry, i'm sorry, i wanted to go on, but i couldn't, couldn't breathe, the tears were choking me.... i can't access your profile, don't know why...... but you are in my heart, you are a sister of the soul, you are a favorite i can't put on a stupid list, but i see you anyway, and i cry all the more, all these souls i will probably never meet, all this communion ...... but no redemption.
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