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 deadrock142
Joined: 7/2/2007
Msg: 4
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Expectations Vs RealityPage 1 of 1    
I was the dumpee not the dumper
When my ex walked out with my best friend ,,yes I was hurt, desperate, confused. I wanted nothing more than another relationship ,needed it something to prove ....desperate..tried the online thing ... nothing much happened ..dont figure ..lol
Next stage look but don't have no one that is close ,,,wher something could work out,,was great for keeping people shut out ...
Now I am just starting to look ,,a little more serious ,,I think I am ready ,,I have learned alot of myself and of others,,,I guess I have grown a bit ...I did think at the time I was ready to date right away after seperation ,,but I am glad I have taken the time ..I may be ready for a relationship ,,or I may just want to date ...Not sure but will plan as it happens ...
I am glad I have the friends I do online ,,some have been with me from the very start ,,they are special,,,,and I also thought I had met a special girl online as well,,,,,wanted to meet her but she would not .......Hmmm... now from that I put alot more on meeting someone than just sitting in front of a pc ....

Guess the long and short of it is ,,,,,,,,I had expected to have a relationship out it real quickly ...the reality is that it has not happened and I am grateful for it ...... for I would rather be alone than enter a bad relation again ..no matter how alone one feels at times
 PrairieNihilist
Joined: 12/22/2006
Msg: 9
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Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 9/4/2007 8:00:14 PM
I didn't really join with any expectations of finding true love. I joined to meet people online, that I might actually have a chance to meet and hang out with if we became friends. It's all fine and good to have online friends all over the world, but who the f*ck has time and money to globetrot, and meet them all? Not this guy.
 PrairieNihilist
Joined: 12/22/2006
Msg: 10
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Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 10/9/2007 1:19:20 AM
I just think it's fun to meet new people for fun. At worst, you won't get along, and can go your own way. Even if you don't click romantically, you can still make friends, and get connected. Ideally, I'd meet like minded musicians who wanted to jam or form a band, but realistically, I just like meeting new people.
 smiliegirl15
Joined: 7/15/2006
Msg: 11
Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 10/11/2007 9:07:07 AM
I think with internet dating many people expect to find the "perfect" person. They will overlook everyone who doesn't fit their criteria thinking they'll find that one special person. As one of my friends said in another thread, by having her list of deal breakers, she was making herself unavailable.
I think you have to open to meet people and get to know them first before you can say this person is not the one. I think everyone should get at least 2 dates before you write them off unless your every instinct says "run!".
In reality, you're going to meet people just like you who are looking for someone too.
 Jim in NB
Joined: 8/2/2006
Msg: 14
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Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 10/21/2007 5:34:45 AM
Well good morning Saskatchewan. Expectations vs reality. Got on this site about a year and a half ago. Have messaged and corresponded with quite a few woman and have made some good friends, even had one relationship this past spring. It didn't pan out - the "spark" wasn't there. Guess some of the woman I corresponded and met at first I may have had my expectations up a little high. I think it is all part of getting back into "the game" again. Was taking it easy this summer - just on the forums. Then a woman came online that lived out in my area - just new to the area and POF. We chatted back and forth really casually and met for a coffee to put voices to the words. I was really relaxed before the coffee and even put the timing back so i could get some shopping done. We met for coffee and life hasn't been the same since. I have met my soul mate. It is wonderful and can happen here. Lots of examples. I think this site is a great way to meet other single people. You just have to wait for the right one and it may not even happen from this site. But it helps you get back in the game if that is your situation and gets you prepared for the right one when they come along. Big thing is to be yourself and keep the faith!!
 littletykes
Joined: 9/26/2007
Msg: 16
Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 11/4/2007 2:33:26 PM
When I first joined here over 2 years ago of course I was filled with the high hopes of meeting that one...being a single mom working from home I didnt and dont have the time to get out to meet people. This site seemed to work for me. Met some great people, some of which I can truly call great friends, some men I hope I can always call a friend even though things didnt work out...some people I shouldnt have met but have helped me change the way I had been thinking. Liers/cheaters/married men etc showed me how to be more selective and picky I guess and not take peoples words till they can back them up. When I came back this last time I had no expectations..in fact Id laugh at the people who were still on here spouting the same old lines not knowing they had talked to me before...but I know reality has set in here in this girl....I am me...accept me for it or dont as it is your choice. It is funny who you run into on here and I think if you just go about each day, enjoy your life and take what comes, this site will work for you. I know it does as I have witnessed a few success stories......( one can still dream it'll work for me right???)
 polly ogerski
Joined: 1/12/2006
Msg: 17
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Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 11/5/2007 7:02:04 AM
Hey girl ^^^^^^^^ 'If you don't got a dream, you don't got anything.'
 Jim in NB
Joined: 8/2/2006
Msg: 18
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Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 11/5/2007 9:32:40 PM
Well just a bit of an update - turns out D wasn't my soul mate - such is life. But she is a good woman who has made me a better a person and has made me feel really good about myself and who I am again, and for that I am thankful. Still have the hope of meeting someone to share life's journey with, whether it be from POF or the real world!lol!! Gotta keep the faith!!!
 littletykes
Joined: 9/26/2007
Msg: 19
Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 11/6/2007 6:54:54 PM
Sometimes what we expect isn't real reality.....We sometimes pump people up into something or someone we want them to be versus who they really are.....^^^^^sorry to hear ur girl didnt work out but such is life...we live and we hopefully learn.....Just this evening I told this guy I have been dating for about 2 weeks that I am sorry in a way he has to have a **** for a girlfriend but such is life...he doesnt think I am yet....LOL...but Im in a different frame of mind this paddle round the pond...been through enough shit within the dating game here lately so taking things slow and easy now....
 StubbornSally
Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 20
Expectations Vs Reality
Posted: 11/10/2007 10:19:45 PM
I came on this site on a fluke...joked with a bud of mine...met some great people, got into the forums, and the rest was history...until I fell upon a new friend in my same city at the time. I SOO didn't want a relationship, but met (him alone, a bunch of my closest friends and my brother there!)...met another time after and now I am living with him, in another city, and I have never been happier. Never know what you're gonna find in the pond, especially when NOT even fishing....best of luck to all!!
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