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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > Do men really care about a womans religion?      Home login  
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 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 1
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Do men really care about a womans religion?Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Hi guys,

This kind of falls into the same idea as the "do men read the profiles" thread. I get a lot of messages from men who don't seem to know, or care, that I practice an alternate religion, or even what it entails to practice an alternate spirituality. Considering that my spirituality is a huge part of who I am I really don't understand how they would consider me a match to them, especially if they are very traditional in this area. I also get messages from men who do seem to know and are interested, which is cool. I guess I'm just a bit mystified by the ones who don't seem to think it's relevant.

Any thoughts?
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 2
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 5:03:39 PM
It's your thing. It doesn't have to be his.

Religion is not that big of a deal anymore, in case you haven't noticed. If you really considered it such of a big deal, maybe it would have been easier if you said that you would only date people who already belonged to your religion.

Besides, men who do seem to know and are interested, are very often just willing to be flexible, while they still want sex. IMHO, any man who was genuinely interested in your religion would be going to meetings all by himself, and getting you into very hot water for arguing with the local minister in his area. If they are NOT doing that, consider that men have fought wars for years just to get their leg over a pretty female that they were attracted to. How are you different? Think you're too old to have a war fought over you? Think you're just not pretty enough? Think again. You're smart, and attractive. A heady combination.

That's my opinion.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 3
Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 6:28:35 PM
Hey, if she likes being on her knees....

Seriously, tho, many men and women are so focused on some aspect of their lives, they don't think about the fact that someone else wouldn't be walking in line with their own beliefs...until it comes up. So yes, some people do skip over that. Also, according to the profile checkup forum, one of the top advice given is to make profiles brief due to short attention span. Apparently, some people do flash thru like we are commercials :(

Thus, some check out only part of the profile, some just flash thru, and as you have noticed, some read everything and ask relevent questions. I guess its about as fustrating as the new appliance owner who calls tech support before reading the manual....but whatcha gonna do?
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 4
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 6:37:31 PM
I appreciate the thoughtful replies

Keep em comin'.. it's a good thing to see other sides of a point.

I don't think I'm being critical of anyone's religion...I just have had a few relationships where misunderstandings about certain aspects of spiritual practices have caused issues. One example...as a pagan I'm not particularly sensitive about nudity. Some rituals call for it... with others involved in the ritual (may not include SO). To someone of more christian or traditional views they may not understanmd this in context.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 5
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 6:43:40 PM
There is no option for Pagan/buddhist/new age/hindu/witch

only "other"

Magick is part of my system...haven't learned how to do sleight of hand yet....
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 6
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 6:58:49 PM
How so?

Magic is stage magic...Magick is real magic, dark or light dear...it's how you use it. I do respect that you have more than anecdotal knowledge though.

Yes..occaisonally(sp) skyclad (although I can say that skyclad rituals are not always pretty, it's not like we screen for attractiveness..Beltane is fun though )... frequently spellworking, lots of herbs and such, I have an altar in my home...and am planning a ritual tattoo. I am also a Priestess, which in my case is a representative of the Goddess. I wear my pentacle outwardly. I am not however anti christian or any other faith.

I don't need a ritual partner...though that could be interesting. I would prefer someone who would support my faith, not necessarily adopt it though. That would be hypocritical.

I wonder how say, a Catholic's family would respond to a potential in-law who was very alternative.

Just questions I have
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 7
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 7:59:55 PM
I agree about the Buddhists and Hindus..it seems kind of strange since they have a huge worldwide following.

I do not practice Thelemic magick, nor follow Alistair Crowley, (he was more sorceror than witch anyway) I think some satanists do though, and Ceremonial Magicians. That's way to high brow for me. I prefer "natural" magick...although some of the concepts overlap. Mine is more personal..a way of supporting my spiritual growth and aligning myself with the natural world. I don't "pray" to an anthropomorphic deity either. Basically I live a pretty pedestrian lifestyle. It's not like I go around in ritual robes and perform spells in public, or have to proclaim my beliefs.

Frothy bubbles! I like that! hehe... reminds me of Aphrodite.

I think my question was answered... a lot of people don't really consider religion at all in the pursiut of a relationship, some do but are willing to be open-minded and "live and let live"... a few don't read or understand the implications...and others are more considering in their approach.

What I glean from this is that the "attitude" of the particular man about my spirituality is a reflection of his own.

Thanks a lot guys. I appreciate you answering so honestly.
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 8
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 8:58:14 PM

One example...as a pagan I'm not particularly sensitive about nudity. Some rituals call for it... with others involved in the ritual (may not include SO). To someone of more christian or traditional views they may not understanmd this in context.
Nearly all people I know would have a problem with their S/O dancing round a campfire naked, even atheists and agnostics.

Thank you so much for directing me down that google path. I'm going to have to wash my brain with soap. Some of that Crowley stuff is going to make me want to gargle all evening. Describing his Thelma religion as "Other" is the only kind choice.
I read over 20 years ago that Crowley was Hitler's astrologer. Just look how successful he was.

Edit: Look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aleister_Crowley
This guy was sick. He bragged about taking hard drugs, including cocaine and heroin.
He defended Anti-Semitic mass attacks against the Jews, even though he read the Kabbalah.
He defended the use of violence against the Chinese, even though he read the I-Ching.
He regarded women as secondary social beings in terms of intellect and sensibility. But he still asked a woman to help him with his rituals.
 vladtepes97
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 9
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 9:25:46 PM
darn right we do! otherwise, it will become a serious point of contention later. i mean, what religious man wants to be with someone who won't go to church with him? it's not as if it's a hobby that he does once in a while, like collecting stamps, or it shouldn't be.
 vladtepes97
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 10
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/22/2007 9:28:56 PM

I like driving Jehova's Witnesses nuts. Its SOOOO easy.


mt brother once kept a joho couple standing and talking at the door for 45 minutes. he told us later it was because the woman was smokin' hot!
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 11
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 9:12:50 AM
Great replies

I don't go into detail about my beliefs on my profile...other than to state pagan, because I can't really describe it in a minute or two. It's much more complicated than that... with buddhist, hindu, pagan and shamanistic elements, and I also take interest in traditional Judeo-christian ideas also.. to me it's all little puzzle pieces to the bigger picture. There is no one definition I can use.

Samhain is a blast also! My personal favorite

I'm not complaining...just interested. Gotta go..I'm off to the zoo with my kid!
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 12
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 9:21:43 AM
Where's the chickens' blood!

Only on horseback during the Sacred Hunt!
 vladtepes97
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 13
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 12:00:18 PM
it seems the majority of responses are from people who do not have much of a religious life to begin with. so, for them, religion doesn't matter. however, i venture that it will matter to whoever those men are with, if the ladies were religious to begin with. an unreligious person going to church with you is not really the kind of sharing that couples like to experience. besides, there's not only weekly services, but occasional prayer meetings someone might want to attend, retreats, special ceremonies, choir practice and pilgrimages.
then, what about possible marriage? will it be a religious sacramental ceremony that requires study and classes with the celebrant, or will it just be a civil contract signed before a judge?
and what about children? will only one parent take them to church while the other stays home, thus giving every indication that going to services or otherwise fulfilling the requirements of a faith means nothing?

if you don't care, better hope she doesn't either.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 14
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 3:05:25 PM
Yes..I can see it becoming an issue if the people involved were thinking about marriage or children. That's not an issue for me anymore. I have my child and do not wish to get married. Handfasted....maybe

I personally wouldn't care what a man's religion was ..if (big if) he was open-minded and tolerant. The only time it would bother me is if he couldn't give me space for my own, or he tried to convert me. But part of my belief system is tolerance and respect for anothers spiritual life.

I've really enjoyed reading all the replies here.
 vladtepes97
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 15
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 6:51:12 PM

I care either cannot have one and thats fine or she can have the same as me and that is fine but god and budda and cannot live in the same house. Know what I mean Jean


you know, this resembles english, but i don't recognise the dialect or the syntax. translation please.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 16
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 7:03:47 PM
Dear Vlad

hehe

I think it means (I'm going out on a limb here) she can either not have a religion or have one (religion...I think) as long as it is the same as his...hopefully they both speak the same language! And somehow the Buddha got confused with "God", (I'm thinking the judeo-christian Jehovah here). I didn't know the Buddha was considered a deity? Like Confucious? Okay, sorry, I am being facetious here.

Personally I think Jesus and the Buddha would get along just fine. They have a lot of the same ideas.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 17
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 7:06:14 PM
AlexSB

Did I ever tell you I love you? You are probably one of the most real people on these forums..I really enjoy reading your posts.

Just needed to say that
 MONEMPERER
Joined: 6/26/2006
Msg: 18
Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/23/2007 7:42:12 PM
as long as they are practical about their religeon I seem to run into alot of wiccans in my life and alot of them are not quite the most rational people. Then again most religeous Fanatics of all sorts whether they are buddist or Taoist or Any stripe of christianity or any other religeon tends to not be very rational. Now I am a deist I know in my heart god exists but I dont think any of the religeons have got it down right.

I do think Jesus and buddha would get along the person of both not the gods that got created later. What has never made sense about christianity to me is the huge difference between the god of the old testament and Jesus its like one went from a right wing militia member wielding a shot gun (old testament god) to a socialist hippie puritan its just a huge difference.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 19
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/24/2007 7:25:26 AM
I love pastafarians!
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 20
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/24/2007 12:44:13 PM
The First House Of Polyester Worship And Horizontal Throbbing Teenage Desire Interfaith Apocalyptic Worldwide Love Gospel Tabernacle

Now that sounds interesting!

No..I am actually the kind of woman who knows men..well some men, are deeper than just a roll in the hay

This thread proves that...so nice

I'm no fanatic..in that I still use the reason I was born with... but spirituality IS important to me. I'm also no evangelist.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 21
Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/24/2007 3:47:33 PM
It really doesn't matter to me what religion a girl is or even if she is religious at all.
But how I am spiritually, may matter to a girl.
So if a girl is very religious, I mention my views early.

If religion is not a big concern for a girl,
it's not for me either.

Stray
 EC22
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 22
Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/24/2007 3:47:56 PM
I wouldn't care unless she tried to shove her beliefs down my throat and was rude to people who don't share her beliefs.
 darkjedi1
Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 23
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/24/2007 8:43:51 PM
Well ravenstar since were both pagan, we know how much our religion means to us. I sure as hell look at their religion first. It means probably as much to me as it does to you. And oh so disapointed most of the time when i check them out too lol.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 24
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/25/2007 6:36:49 AM
FeistyFaerie

so true.... it has taken me half my life to find my path, and I'm a much less neurotic person than I was trying to fit in with traditional religions. At peace..yes, that's a good way to put it.

being mostly a solitary I haven't really had the chance to be with lots of other pagans (except on the net) so I can't speak to their relative stability, but I would think there are those who are and those who aren't...I doubt the stability of any fanatics. Skyclad..hmmm... I started by doing my personal esbats (inside) skyclad. It really gave me a better sense of the divine feminine than the robes. I'm a little concerned about mosquitos outside! But I always go unshod outside.

To all who replied here, I want to thank you for your candor and thoughtfulness in replying. I think the consesnsus is nobody wants to have spirituality or religion shoved down their throats.

To my pagan friends.. yes, they should have an option for Pagans/Heathens, Buddhists and Hindus on here. Other is just not good enough. If you have noticed there are quite a few of us here.

Merry Mabon! I hope this years harvest was as abundant for you as it has been for me.

Namasté

Ravenstar
 Seavoyage
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 25
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Do men really care about a womans religion?
Posted: 9/25/2007 8:26:39 AM
Well, as long as a woman is not very dogmatic like Evangelical or hates people who ate meat, I don't care too much about that. I am a spiritual person. I don't put my views on others and focus more on the person than their religion, but sometimes someone's religious views can be a problem.
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