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 Addicted_2_Chaos
Joined: 6/30/2006
Msg: 1
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?Page 1 of 34    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34)
I know I can't paint all women with this brush, but my experiences in the last year have really surprised me. Out of the 4 women I have dated, I had to break things off after a short period (2 mos and 4 mos) because 2 of them assumed we were next at the marriage altar. This was without hints, discussions, or talking about this subject. The other two relationships faded due to no chemistry, etc.

Despite my clarity on my short term future, I was blind-sided with this assumption, and then when I called a time- out, I was amazed at the nastiness and resentment.

I thought women always wanted "to go slow" ? Both women had grown children, so the old "biological clock" excuse won't wash. Please help me understand.
 ~CountrySugar~
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 2
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:18:11 PM
Well I'm over 40 and in no rush to make another mistake...I've been married once and we both messed that up. If I ever decide to take that step again..rest assured I am going to make darn sure it's forever before doing so...and you can't rush that!
 Arborea
Joined: 9/29/2007
Msg: 3
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:31:12 PM
Let's see, you're addicted to chaos - maybe you're choosing needy "chaotic" women who have no clue what makes a relationship work?

Honestly though I don't know the answer to your question. I'm not over 40, but you can be darned sure I'll never want to jump into marriage! Once is enough for me.
 drewwlf
Joined: 5/24/2007
Msg: 4
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:38:52 PM
Because you are a Studmuffin and they want to grab you up before someone else does.


Drewwlf

 regalrose
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:41:43 PM
LMAO...oh bless your heart!!! Maybe you were so danged great they just had to snap ya up before ya took off on 'em!! lol....seriously hon, I have no clue. I'm 44, been separated for 2 1/2 yrs, so I know I dang sure ain't in no hurry to marry again since I ain't even divorced yet (but wish to heck I was....and that's another story altogether). Even if I were though, I don't think I'd be in any hurry, even if the man of my dreams walked in and asked me first thing. Sounds to me like these desperate women had an agenda...coulda been simply what I said at first, coulda been they saw dollar signs, could be they wanted you wed before ya knew what hit ya (their REAL personalities)...who knows. You had four women in the last year wantin to marry ya...that in itself ain't normal unless you are truly one helluva guy. Think back...did you do something to make these gals think you were marriage minded? Hmmm, the nastiness could have been from feeling rejected, or because they really thought ya led them to believe marriage was on the ticket. My advice would be to look back over the situations and see if you did or said anything that maybe they mighta took the wrong way...or if they've cooled off...find out what made them assume such a thing. Hope ya get your answers.
 mlsaarln
Joined: 9/23/2006
Msg: 6
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:54:30 PM
Who says?! My experience tells me it is men who act that way! In any case, I really think that the reality (sadly, even at this age) is that men tell women what they think they want to hear, & women so like the attention that they hesitate to call them on it.

Wow! Do you think that's why I don't date much?
 single_lookin850
Joined: 8/20/2007
Msg: 7
view profile
History
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:54:43 PM
Well here is another woman that is in no rush to get married again thank you very much. I am 49 and have been single since 38.
 Smart-Blonde
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 8
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:03:31 PM
In no rush either. Not even sure I want to go there again. I have worked hard to have a life all on my own. My house is already filled with all males......... 2 boys, 2 male bunnies and even the dang fish is male.... Not sure I can deal with another
 bearwoman1959
Joined: 8/25/2006
Msg: 9
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:03:46 PM
I'm supposed to be looking for another husband? Damnit, I knew I was forgetting something. Yeah, just what I need, another person to wait on, clean up after, and put up with all his dumb chit. Been there, got the tee shirt.
 str8ahd
Joined: 5/22/2007
Msg: 10
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:15:25 PM
Nope, not me. Not now, not ever. As someone else said, I find it's the men who want to get serious & committed right away, & are looking for a wife.
 mtnskigirl
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 11
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:16:27 PM
Hey Stud aka Addicted 2 Chaos

Could be your name tells the whole story.........
 Temptation50
Joined: 5/13/2007
Msg: 12
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:18:02 PM
I don't know any ladies over 40 that are "desparate'' for anything.....
I know a few that wanted kids before time ran out.....
Some would be interested in co-habitating, eventually, with the right guy.
And a freeking ton that would love a relationship.......
Desparate for marriage?Nope, none.
 artistdesign
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 13
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:23:56 PM
I know plenty of older women that do not want to rush to the alter including myself,your experience in older women is obviously limited (only 4) so please before you put another heading up have a little more experience will ya?,some of us are really fussy about finding the right partner.......you must have something they want I guess!!!.
 Indigo rose
Joined: 3/17/2007
Msg: 14
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:29:00 PM
We are? I am thinking you must have something that doesn't show
I am not sure why women over forty want to marry you??? Are you loaded?
Maybe you throw out the challenge...let me gander at your profile..brb..
Maybe it is the cute little way you slouch???
 sxyvirgo
Joined: 7/26/2006
Msg: 15
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:30:16 PM
Maybe women who have NEVER been married! I think those who have been through a divorce are a bit slower to want to get into another marriage...and perhaps have different priorities having already experienced wedded "bliss"! lol
 My I
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 16
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:40:19 PM

I know I can't paint all women with this brush, but my experiences in the last year have really surprised me. Out of the 4 women I have dated, I had to break things off after a short period (2 mos and 4 mos) because 2 of them assumed we were next at the marriage altar


It's amazing how perspectives can differ.... After reading a ton of threads on the topic, I am of the opinion that I am too old for women my age due to D.M.S. (Demi Moore syndrome).

I thought 40 something women dating men in their 40's meant they were desperate.

 addakiss
Joined: 10/8/2007
Msg: 17
view profile
History
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:43:38 PM
wow,I JUST TURNED 40.LESS THEN 2 WEEKS AGO.I CAN TELL YOU I AM NOT NOW SO DESPERATE TO GET MARRIED THAT I WOULD GRAB THE FIRST MAN I CAME ACROSS.AGE DOESN'T MEAN SHIT.IF THERE DESPERATE TO GET MARRIED,THEN YOUR PICKING THE WRONG WOMAN TO TALK TO OR YOU ARE LEADING THEM ON.WHICH ONE??
ADDAKISS
 Mafiachixrule
Joined: 5/4/2007
Msg: 18
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:46:06 PM
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?


Are you insane? Most women over 40 would rather be ran over by a bus, first!
 p-trishTHEdish
Joined: 8/3/2007
Msg: 19
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:47:55 PM
I know I can't paint all women with this brush, but my experiences in the last year have really surprised me. Out of the 4 women I have dated, I had to break things off after a short period (2 mos and 4 mos) because 2 of them assumed we were next at the marriage altar. This was without hints, discussions, or talking about this subject. The other two relationships faded due to no chemistry, etc.

Despite my clarity on my short term future, I was blind-sided with this assumption, and then when I called a time- out, I was amazed at the nastiness and resentment.

I thought women always wanted "to go slow" ? Both women had grown children, so the old "biological clock" excuse won't wash. Please help me understand

YEAH, OK,, sure heres some understanding,, you are leaving out some fairly key points to this. i can just feel it. specially after reading the reply posts and being one of those over 40's who is in no rush to the alter.
key term you used " my short term future" << what on earth is that? sounds to me you are being vague. perhaps thats the problem. you wont even admit to yourself that what you are really looking for is no strings attachments that include sex. and hey if thats what your down for,, DO THAT,, just make sure you are very clear about it. i mean send absolutely no subliminals on this. if thats not what your in it for,, then maybe you need more clarity on what it is you actually do want.
 Frau Blücher
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 20
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:50:53 PM
I will help you understand. You are still blind-sighted by assumption. Your conclusion that women over 40 are singing the wedding bell blues is based upon a mere two women who wanted to tie the knot. To be able to even paint most women with this brush you’re going to have to stretch your canvass a lot farther than that.
 SlowDancerOnly
Joined: 9/19/2007
Msg: 21
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:56:50 PM
I don't think all women over 40 are desperate to get married. I myself, definately am not. Infact, I'm not looking to get married again. Although I'd like to have a committed relationship one day with the right guy. I've come across several men over the last few years over 40 that were desperate to get married. Some people just seem to feel they need to be married. I have no idea.
 Diana619
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 22
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 9:04:49 PM

Please help me understand


Ok.........I will try. First off........You are extremely handsome, have a body that tells me that you obviously work out on a daily basis (guessing you are hiding a six pack under that shirt), not arrogant at all, you have interests that all woman love, such as Fishing, trucks, firearms,hunting corvettes,country music and camping. You are the total package that all woman over 40 would jump at the chance to snag for life.
 11thhour
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 23
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 9:16:46 PM
You just don't know how to pick 'em. Next time, try one who's already been married (and divorced), with a job, a place of her own to live, grown/successful children and her own set of opinions...trust me...you won't have a thing to worry about!
 eb3267
Joined: 1/29/2007
Msg: 24
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 9:24:15 PM
I'm 40 and was married for 20 years.

I am with an AMAZING MAN now, but there are no wedding bells in my future, at least not any time soon.. Him moving in though, is a real possibility !! Ok ok, so he probibly WILL move in within a the next few months.. lol

I'm not sure if I want to get married again though. Part of me feels as though I went through enough the first time around, and that lasted 20 years. This is the first time that I can realy say, I don't need a man. I love having the man I'm exclusive with around me, and I think that we would be great living together. But it took 20 years to "Find Me" and I have to admit that I am afraid that I might loose that if I said "I Do" again....

When I was with the Ex, he became my "whole" reason for living. I forgot where he ended and I started. I can't do that again, and I've grown up since then, but there are times that I still worry about falling too hard and forgetting about "What I Need".

I'm not sure if that makes any since to you guys out there, but I'm sure that a few women know exactly what I mean..
 eagre
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 25
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 10/15/2007 9:36:44 PM
What an amazingly wonderful thing to have someone want to marry you. I think we all want that special someone to be our spouse in our 40s but we are now going to take the test of time before we jump. We are wise.
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