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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?      Home login  
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 untamed one
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 8
Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
agree with every previous post , including not having any contact , serving two purposes , protecting your child and denying him any contact , as he gets older , he WILL want contact , guaranteed , but has he earned it ? Good luck , OP :)
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 13
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Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/17/2008 3:54:31 PM
Ohhh Huni, of course he has accused you of getting pregnant on purpose... Just another prime example of how much love and respect he has for you.

Sweety, actions speak louder than words.. HEAR what his ACTIONS are saying...

Single parenthood is completely perferable than to trying to make it work with someone that doesn't want you in the first place.

Obviously he's has a FIELD Day with two women, and telling both what they want to hear so he can have his cake and eat it too.

How to know when this guy is lying???? His mouth will be moving and words will be tumbling out of it...

You have your hands ful, take charge and make being a good providing mum the priority... Good luck from one who's walked your road many years ago..
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 14
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Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/17/2008 4:02:41 PM

OP, Have mercy on your baby and put it up for adoption. You're only 21 years old. You have nearly 20 years to try again and do it right. If you keep this baby without a father in the home to help you raise it, you will still love it, but you will regret ever having gotten pregnant at this stage in your life. You'll hate the father for abandoning you and those feelings will transfer to the baby.

Pregnancy happens when nubile women have unprotected sex during ovulation. You really didn't know that?


Sejaynous, yes adoption is an option, but not for everyone... WHO THE HECK SAYS she will have regrets for that part of her life, hate the father and pass it on to her child???

Some of us are MORE than capable of raising great kids single handedly, and have them turn out to be Designers, Dr's... Ahhhh yes, speaking of my own two that I had out of wedlock...

As for how she got pregnant, that really is a moot point. However it happened, it happened, why would you pass information that apparently she is aware of... Women can get pregnant even ON birthcontrol, so what ever happened, happened...
 ~LoriMac~
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 16
Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/17/2008 4:22:18 PM
oh honey,...breaks my heart when pretty girls are sooooooo dumb about men....this isnt love...this is convienient for him...You dont FEEL disrespected...you ARE disrespected... he is not a good man and certainly not a good role model for the little boy you will have. NEVER ever make it work for the sake of the children. It cant work like that and frankly you can easily do better. I swear you couldnt pray for worse than this guy...and one day you will meet someone who will love you...treat you like the beautiful princess you are. He will teach your son that loving one woman in a committed way is the measure of a real man.
This fool is so not good enough for you...be grateful for the gift of that baby and tell him take his lying cheating playa ass somewhere else.
 Lario
Joined: 5/2/2005
Msg: 17
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Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/17/2008 4:41:54 PM
Marry Him. Get him to admit to fatherhood and accepting responsibilty for his actions. Talk to his ex girlfriend and tell her he's gotten you pregnant. She'll think less of him. Tell him you're going to do that.. matter of fact, have him arrange a meeting with the 3 of you and let hi tell her while you're there.

I'm not saying give him another chance.. I'm saying give your child a chance for a happy family life and the both of you can still do that for your child.
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 22
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Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/18/2008 7:16:22 AM

giving the OP the advise they think is best. Mainly telling her to keep the baby, which I completely understand, being the knee jerk reaction it is.


Actually I don't see anyone giving her advice about keeping the baby, that was never a question posed by the OP. You are the only one telling her to have mercy, and live her life.
I know many sad I was adopted and not loved by my adoptive parents as well, that is not always the best course.

She asked if she should give the GUY a 2nd chance.

OP, I am in agreement with you about questioning after the fact. (see first post) perhaps for the sake of your BP, try not to get to frustrated with advice or judgment on a plate form such as this.

Some people are good at arm chair psychology, others behave like the morality police.

I have two girls that for the most part I was a single parent from start to adulthood. Oldest has a Bachelors in Fashion Design, and the 2nd is premed.

Single parenting IS a hard road, HOWEVER I know that being in a bad marriage doesn't make it any better.

My hope for you is that you have family and friend support, makes a world of difference... The only chance I would be giving "romeo" is to pay child support, because that IS for your son, and see what part of parenting he is capable of playing...

Good luck to you...
 EagleEric
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 23
Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/18/2008 7:47:59 AM
I don't know why women can't learn some simple facts of life. Let me clue you in. Just about any man will screw just about any woman who'll let him. Who suffers the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy? Why obviously the woman does. Men are mobile and often can escape all responsibility be it financial or otherwise.

There are a lot of children born in this world who end up not really being wanted. They were the result of lust rather than love. Perhaps one parent or another will take care of them, but this is never an ideal situation. Even if the natural parents eventually married, it isn't likely that it would be a good relationship.

So what's the point of all of this? If you want love, happiness, and perhaps a family, then you must have from and give to a partner committment. Many women finally discover this amazing idea but unfortunately very far down the road even years past their child bearing age!

For committment to develop takes time - time spent together getting to know each other. Can you keep your clothes on long enough to see if the other half feels you're worthwhile enough to stick around is problematic. However, if you're going to have sex, the possibility of pregnancy should always be in the forefront of your mind. Also don't expect the male to worry about it.

The woman should always worry about it, and it's her responsibility to take the necessary precautions to ensure it doesn't happen when unwanted or unexpected.

Many people think that there are many paths available down this experience called life. In actuality, there is really only one correct one. If you can't learn or discover this, you'll always be doomed to misery of your own creation.

The Eagle
 gonzofanmel
Joined: 10/3/2006
Msg: 25
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Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:24:16 PM
OP,

Actions speak louder than words. And his actions--lying, keeping you on a line, going back and forth with you--don't back up his words of "love" one iota.

Drop him like the bad habit he is and go after his azz for child support (if you can, that is. I don't know the laws for that in Canada).
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Another chance, or is it really time to hit the road?