Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Your Kids Friends.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Quack
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 1
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.Page 1 of 1    
If your a mom/dad and you have high school age children. Do you find it that you feel the need to be their kids friend? Where do you draw the line? Going to their sporting events (with or without your kids), texting, calling,emailing, having them visit when your kids arent around. Does it differ for kids that are the opposite sex from you? How do you think your kids feel about you being friends with their friends, same sex or opposite?
 Quack
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 2
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/17/2008 3:21:37 PM
^^^ Would you find it ok to be texting to your daughters male friends? I understand being close with your kids friends, but where do you draw the line?

For people wondering this isnt me I am talking about.. I just know someone that is a female and her daughters friends that are male, she is texting to. Being that these are high school kids.... do you think it is right?
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 3
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/17/2008 4:24:01 PM
I guess it would depend on why she is texting, the information being passed through the texts, etc. Is it checking up on the daughter? I think what you are getting at OP is that the kids will start seeing the mom as just a friend and forget that she is a parent. I would imagine that depending on the nature of the texts, a parent of one of those boys could wonder wtf the woman is doing texting her/his son as if she too were a teen.

My oldest is just getting to the age that kids would drop by as greeneyed said and miss the kid they are actually coming to visit. I am also the "cool" mom (I think because I actually talk to kids) and they might hang around talking to me for a bit. But with the cells, if my kid was not coming home anytime soon, I don't expect that the friend would be particularly inclined to stay and if he/she did, it would likely also be because of my other kids.

My kids' friends know they can come to me if they have problems and I think they do think of me as a quasi friend but like my kids, they know I am a parent first. Most of them know that when they tell my kids something in confidence that it remains that but also that if it is a situation that one of them is really going to do potential harm to themself, that my kids will talk to me so I can decide whether something should be "done."

My daughter does have one friend from church that is a year older than she and she will communicate with me outside her friendship with my daughter. It does tick her off a little bit but I remind her that this girl's mother is a drug addict and bipolar and has spent most of the girl's life in prison so she is not an average kid. But it also doesn't sound like this is the type of relationship your friend has with these guys she is texting.
 Quack
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/17/2008 5:40:58 PM

I guess it would depend on why she is texting, the information being passed through the texts, etc. Is it checking up on the daughter? I think what you are getting at OP is that the kids will start seeing the mom as just a friend and forget that she is a parent. I would imagine that depending on the nature of the texts, a parent of one of those boys could wonder wtf the woman is doing texting her/his son as if she too were a teen


Dont you think that if a mother is texting back and forth with a male friend of her daughter. That is steping over the bounds of parenting, and moving towards Mrs. Robinson. Wouldnt you as a parent be more inclined to just call? What would you think if a father of one of your daughters friends was texting your own daughter?
 Quack
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/17/2008 6:33:43 PM

If you suspect that this could be happening, give her a grown up talking to.


Did just that and she got mad. She, as I find with most women, see things as innocent until it bite them in the arse. It maybe truely be innocent on her end, but what about the kid. She is not a bad looking woman, I am sure the kids mind is going else where.
 wanderbaby
Joined: 9/4/2006
Msg: 6
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/17/2008 7:28:48 PM
how about text her, and say you're the kid's father, and you found out about the text and they are uncalled for and she should be careful before things get serious. then maybe she'll wake up and realize she's going over the line.

It's great that you can be friends with your kids' friends but texting often, not a good idea, especially if it's the opposite sex.
 Quack
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 7
view profile
History
Your Kids Friends.
Posted: 2/18/2008 11:53:49 AM
Well then maybe she will se what I was trying to tell her what I was trying to. I would just hate for her to get into something that is not going to be good.
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Your Kids Friends.