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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Over 40 and no children?      Home login  
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 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 13
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Over 40 and no children?Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Sweetie? I have no idea what you have been ingesting, but do yourself a favor and back away!!!!!!!
I have two children. Yes, they are the most precious things in my life. However! I am also many other things in this world to add to being a Mom. I have tried to understand your logic, truly I have. But to me it all comes back to "arrogance" on your part. And very very condescending!!
And just when I think I have read/heard it all....
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 22
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 3:34:17 PM
Ironman - I think your heart is made of iron to have such an attitude. What a horse's ass type of attitude. Why do you care whether someone brings a child into this world or not?

Children are a choice, they are a luxury. Too many people "sire" children, and are unfit parents. It's a shame that there isn't a license requirement to bring children into this world.

I'm glad that your children justify your life. Until you walk in someone's shoes, don't be so quick to criticize why they have or haven't brought kids into this world. Like it or not, each of us has a purpose on earth. Just the mere act of copulating to bring children into this world does not define one's purpose. Perhaps some soul searching as to why one's real purpose on earth is, requires greater research on your part.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 25
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 4:06:24 PM

They are my motivation for getting out of bed in the morning, the reason I started my business and basically they jusify my life.

Sorry to hear you are so insecure and lacking in self esteem that you have to justify your existence, and attack those who have made different choices.
Reproducing doesn't make you superior to other people.
Your life must be very small and dull if you need to come on the internet and insult other humans for their life choices.

My life is a gift from God. It does not REQUIRE justification, or that I "do something spectacular".

You must be so terribly insecure about your self worth.
Cindy O
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 26
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 4:09:53 PM
OP - doesn't matter whether I read your original post or many down the road that you've responded to. I knew in 8th grade that I didn't not want children. Partly due to the fact that my parents had 4 kids in less than 6 years, of which my sister had health problems (still does at 53 years of age), and the fact that I was born with cerebal palsy. I grew up with a set of parents that had no emotional energy to devote to all 4 of their children, there was very little nuturing, much less affection. To this day, I still feel like I was a burden to my parents (who are still alive & have been married for 57 years). Then, I found out at the age of 25 that I couldn't have children.

Are there regrets? Nope!!! Because I've made a "difference" in some people's lives , some of whom I've become very close friends with. One of the fellas told me (on his death bed), that he was glad that he and I remained very good friends. Had I not been in his life as a very dear friend, he would've died 12 years earlier. He gave his parents, his family, and friends, 12 years, because I gave him a kick in the butt that he needed to, to "live", not merely "exist".

So, while I've not produced heirs to my riches (financially), I've been able to make a difference in other's lives.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 30
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 6:13:53 PM

Maybe someone who doesn't have children will come along and, instead of attacking my views, give me theirs so I may better understand their motivation.

Why do you think you have some entitlement to understand someone else's motivation for how they choose live their life?

You CHOSE to state that your children justify your existence. That's fine. But some people get their validation from within, and don't NEED to have external "proof" of their worth.

What happened, OP? Somebody reject you because she didn't want to be involved with someone who has minor children?
Cindy O
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 34
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 7:07:38 PM
We all GET that the OP loves his kids. That's what you are SUPPOSED to do if you have them. Loving your kids doesn't grant you some extra brownie points that can be used to hold other people in judgement.

My question is, if you're not going to do something spectacular with your life and you don't plan on having children, what is your reason for exsistance? Are you not just a drain on resources? Are you not betraying your blood line by not passing on your genes?


How is this an expression of loving his kids? What I see is a suggestion that childless people must do something "spectacular" with their lives to justify their existence. I see someone with some sort of grudge against people who do not have children.
I still say he probably got turned down by a woman who didn't want to date a guy with minor children, or maybe he got his time beat,in courting a woman, by a guy who doesn't have kids.
Cindy O
 NancyC123
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 36
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 7:18:59 PM
You're kidding, right?!

My not having children was a personal preference of MY OWN! There was no way I was going to spawn for the sake of my parents wanting to be grandparents! I was not going to give life just because OTHERS wanted me to! It was a choice I made! I mean, how selfish would it be for me to give life and then not really WANT IT?! Are you KIDDING me?! And, for your information, I DO have a life - a wonderful, FULFILLING life WITHOUT passing on my bloodline, thank you very much! Oh, and here's something that might make your head turn a good 180 - I'm an only child so my name stops after ME - it ENDS! It's not because I'm a MEAN person that I did this, it's because I CHOSE it for myself!

This is truly a very insulting, degrading post! Look, buddy - I'm happy for you that you love your children and that they're your world - more power to you! But, don't look down on others because they didn't choose the same path you did! There are some who chose not to further the bloodline and then there are those who COULDN'T, for whatever reason, do so even if they WANTED to, so how DARE YOU insinuate that you're SUPERIOR just because you SPREAD YOUR SEED! Then again, you Brits aren't quite well-known for moving outside of the gene-pool all that much to begin with - ergo all that INBREEDING!

I certainly hope for your children's sake that they grow up to be LESS JUDGMENTAL as their dear, darling Dad because you're already starting them off on a bad foot if you're going to make them think small-mindedly like you do! Poor things! They don't stand a chance! And, isn't that just wonderful for the world - more people that think like YOU! Yeah, let's all bow to the great one - NOT! Let's just hope and pray that nothing genetic happens to them where THEY CAN'T reproduce! Wouldn't that be a cruel twist of fate, huh?! I don't wish it, but God sometimes has a wicked sense of humor! So, I'd think twice before getting on that high-horse of yours and casting that superiority complex all over the place!

 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 37
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 7:36:58 PM
Well, my son is 24 years old and is extremely well adjusted and successful.

Since my job is done, I guess someone needs to take me behind the barn and shoot me as I really have no other purpose on this earth now.

Amazingly enough, I never resorted to driving a mini van with that utterly imbecilic "baby on board" sign, either. Yeah I know - call me kookie. And to those of you who've chosen to be child-free, I thank you - that's just less kids ruining my cruise vacation.
 NancyC123
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 38
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 7:43:37 PM
Amen, Jerseygirl! You're welcome for not having your cruise vacation ruined - I didn't want mine ruined, either - ergo, CHILDLESS! I love my cruises too damn much! So, I guess that means we steer clear from the Carnival Cruise Lines, huh...?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 41
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 3/31/2008 9:11:38 PM
"Are you not just a drain on resources?"

The one who are a drain on resources are the people who are reproducing. The world can't support the amount of people they already have.

A friend of mine once said that she and her husband had decided not to have children because they were so sick of having to step in a care for their friends children when they friends lives became drama zones.

I once read that the best thing you can do for your children is to love your spouse. So many people today can't give that to their children, but they can out with comments like "They are my motivation for getting out of bed in the morning, the reason I started my business and basically they jusify my life."

To be fair to those children, I hope you set them free to have their own lives, and don't try to force a co dependant relationship on them.

Once you learn to love yourself, getting out of bed won't be a problem.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 44
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 4/1/2008 8:51:37 AM
If you feel that way about your own purpose OP, are you going to be dating only women with the same purpose? Whatever are you going to do when you become empty nesters? Doesn't sound like you are going to enjoy your life very much.
 NancyC123
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 46
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 4/1/2008 11:02:36 AM
Beaches, if only I could hug you! You called him EXACTLY what I wanted to but I think I did fairly well with the inbreeding comment! I do so enjoy your touch of sarcasm!

Oh, and if anyone has noticed, Mr. Spermicide has yet to comment back on ANYTHING that's been posted since his wonderful statement to the world. Perhaps he was nothing but an ugly troll?
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 63
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 4/3/2008 3:01:53 PM
You know OP, as many have said, there are many, many reasons as to why some people don't have children. They are all personal and varied reasons that are not YOUR'S or any one else's business and in some cases, it is a blessing or incredible insight that some people have not chosen to reproduce as it is their right. It is fabulous that your being a parent is your reason for getting up each day. Good for YOU. As for doing something "spectacular"....what have YOU done besides donating sperm to keep your ignorant bloodline going?

However, you have no right to judge those who are not parents for we are not second class citizens.
 litlee
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 70
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 4/15/2008 11:27:29 PM
OP,..
your not a very bright man.
very clueless in the ways of mother nature and all her children.
you know nothing of the natural world, or the real world for that matter.
do your homework! then you will understand how really ignorant you are.
your children justify you life? Maybe you would have been better off
saying, your children are your reason for living. Which would have been
more understandable. Here is to hoping your children do not become a
drain on resources. Oh pardon me... my mistake, they already are by existing.
Just like YOU,.. they eat, they shit, they wear clothes, they get sick,
they make demands, they produce garbage, on and on one could go.
So what have YOU done to make this world a better place? Not a damn thing.
Shame on you for bringing children into your personal search on a web site!!!!!
but then like I said, not a very bright man.
 Just 4 You
Joined: 1/25/2005
Msg: 75
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 8/27/2008 1:55:17 AM
Let your brother or sister have the kids and you're the great Uncle or Aunt spoiling them rotten, loading them with sweets and then sending them home hyperactive!
 pokerjimmy
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 79
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 8/27/2008 8:14:29 AM
Great name ironman. You're going to need to be since you brought the wrath of every woman who's read this thread down on you. You crack me up bro.
 Remagine
Joined: 5/17/2006
Msg: 86
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 8/28/2008 8:54:05 PM
"Are you not just a drain on resources?"

I work and because of my work other people have jobs too. I pay taxes, tip waitresses & buy stuff. I realized at a early age I didn't want kids and took precautions. Once I was old enough I fixed it permanently. Family, friends and artistic endeavors keep me going.
 Optimistic for 2008
Joined: 5/2/2008
Msg: 91
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 8/29/2008 7:45:48 PM
Figures....a profile so anonomous it doesn't exist....can't imagine anyone wanting to 'own up' your sickness by identifying themselves....Any one else, besides people responsible enough to know if bringing children into there and this world that you'd like to exterminate? And would it be "you" that we report to find out if what were doing is worthy and spectacular? (a**hole)
 YourLuckyStars
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 98
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 8/31/2008 11:11:01 PM
For your 14 year old daughter's sake, I hope she never comes crying to you because she has fertility problems. What would you do? Suggest she off herself?

You're sad...and arrogant.

Oh, and remember, "Mommy's babies are daddy's maybe"...Are you sure you were the sperm donor?
 Brownlady1953
Joined: 12/12/2008
Msg: 106
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/16/2009 1:02:59 PM
Two of my closest friends are over 40 (ove 50), and are childless! I have one child....I don't think I am any "better" than they are, and if they had 100 children, it wouldn't change how I feel about them as friends....

This is just as mean-spirited a post as the ones by people who are childless who ****, moan, and complain about people who have children.....the same children who will grow up and pay into the (US) social security system to support them in their old age!

"Why can't we all just get along?" Black and white, parents and the childless, fat and skinny, short and tall..........
 Merrylass
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 112
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/21/2009 1:06:15 PM
Actually, I probably should have passed on some genes - turns out I've got a pretty good physical profile to pass on. Sorry, world. I don't know if sucking out some stem cells of mine would be helpful to anyone.

As for 'passing on bloodlines' - ridiculous. You should take pride in passing on your beliefs, ethics, kindness, compassion - doesn't matter to whom. As for doing something 'spectacular', I wonder how 'spectacular' it needs to be. Is helping one person or some people not good enough? Do we add up a dollar sum of humans and then determine how many you need to help to have been considered 'spectacular'?
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 114
Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/21/2009 2:16:59 PM
I see that the op is gone, but I will respond all the same. I have four adult children and they are and always will be a huge part of my life, but they are not my entire life.

Most of us will never do anything spectacular with our lives, but I don't think the only reason for living is having children. I don't feel any of us have to do anything to justify the fact that we are alive.

It would seem to me that people without children are less of a drain on resources than those of us that have children. If I had not had children, there would just be me "dipping" into the resources, but I have 4 children and two of them also have children, so now there are 8 of us "dipping" into the resurces. Bottom line, my having children has added 7 more humans to this earth. I am not saying I regret having children, just looking at it from a strictly practical point of view.

My blood line? Am I meant to think that I am so wonderful that the world could not have gone on without me reproducing?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 115
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/21/2009 3:00:11 PM
"My question is, if you're not going to do something spectacular with your life and you don't plan on having children, what is your reason for exsistance? Are you not just a drain on resources? Are you not betraying your blood line by not passing on your genes? "

I guess I live in a different world. I don't see over populating the world as a good thing. I don't see reproducing as being enough to prove your worth. It all sounds very limiting to me.

I believe it is time that people look at the reality that it is time to cut down the world population.

I believe it is time to admit that if you can't afford to education your children in university, that it is not a good idea to have children in the first place.


How limiting it sounds to me that having children is enough of a reason to claim for existance? I won't list my work with humanity. I will just say it has importance that simple breeding doesn't.

I will add that I won't date or have as a friend someone who thinks simply having children is enough to justify their life.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 118
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/22/2009 9:12:16 AM
"the same children who will grow up and pay into the (US) social security system to support them in their old age!"

Don't know how it works in the USA, but here in Canada, I have had to pay much more than I could ever spend in my old age on education for people who have multiple children. My house taxes mostly go to pay for elementary and high schools. I wasn't educated here, and have no children.......................so.................plus I have paid taxes toward my old age security every year for decades. I owe no one that for having old age security when I retire.
 cfb62
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 121
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Over 40 and no children?
Posted: 1/23/2009 7:39:59 AM
OP, you are a drain on society!
This has got to be the rudest thing I've read since.
I feel really really sorry for you children.
With a father like you, they barely have a shot at being decent human beings.
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