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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Is This Considered Cheating ???      Home login  
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 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 3
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Is This Considered Cheating ???Page 1 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
It all depends on the couples and how "open" they are sexually.
After all, some will do threesomes and such.
Plus, in some ways... it could be compared to looking at porn and pleasuring yourself.

However...

Did the spouses KNOW what's going on between these two?
Probably not.

Did the spouses agree that such was acceptable?
Doubtful.

This goes beyond porn... because, while you're "looking but not touching"... you're doing it with a person you will see on a regular basis. Someone you know you have an attraction towards.

Personally, yes, I'd say that what they did constitutes cheating.
I find it highly unlikely that either would admit to their spouse what happened. And that's the first sign that it IS cheating. If it's something you have to hide... or don't feel comfortable telling your partner about... then you KNOW that it's cheating. Simple as that.
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 8
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 12:11:18 PM
Yes, they cheated on their spouses. To me sex is an act that involves two people, with at least one of them reaching a climax. They both did, and as a result they cheated.
 Beaugrand®™©
Joined: 3/24/2008
Msg: 12
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 12:29:48 PM
If it isn't cheating now, it will be very soon.
 HarleyKat~
Joined: 3/30/2008
Msg: 20
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 1:05:22 PM
Well OF COURSE IT IS CHEATING!!

There is emotional cheating as well as physical cheating...but I would consider this definitely physically cheating! They took place in a sexual act, whether his penis ever entered her in any way, makes no difference!

(This reminds me of how todays teens don't think that oral sex is sex!!)


Yes, they cheated on their spouses. To me sex is an act that involves two people, with at least one of them reaching a climax. They both did, and as a result they cheated.


OH MY GAWD!! Climax is NOT required to consider an act, sex!!! Gee...if everyone that does not climax was considered not having sex, we would have a LOT of virgins still out there! LMAO LMAO
 hootinholler
Joined: 6/10/2006
Msg: 23
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 1:12:37 PM
I don't know about it being cheating, but I think I have a new fantasy...

That interview one was getting old.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 45
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 3:44:32 PM
Oh man ........ that is ruff and I know it for sure.

The exact same thing happened to me one time. But we did speak - just did not touch.

Talk about feeling guilty .........

It is HORRIBLE guilt.

That guilt stayed with me for like ......... 30 minutes after I woke up.
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 46
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/11/2008 3:45:57 PM
Let me ask this - would both of these co-workers do this in front of both of their spouses? I think not. If not, then, I'd say it's cheating, or damn close. It's a situation waiting to hit the fan.
 opnmydm
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 60
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 5:34:30 AM
um yes, this is cheating, would you want or approve your otherhalf to partake in this kind of activity herself with someone she knows without your knowing or approval?
 Joe33647
Joined: 5/22/2007
Msg: 70
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 9:33:04 AM
If you have to ask then you already know the answer.
 Myrna43
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 71
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 9:36:58 AM
Yes it is cheating and what is worse they are trying to fool themselves. If they don't think this will lead to more they are nuts.
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 73
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:14:11 AM
This is a dumb scenario; of course it is. If you are not willing to do something in front of your wife when you are with another woman, then yes you are cheating. If its not then they sh0uld have no problem doing this in front of their spouses.

It amazes me how bad character is these days. I'm attracted to a ton of women but I also have self control. Trying to find ways to have sexual experiences with the opposite sex that arent' considered cheating is ridiculous.
 YingKissesYang
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 77
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:44:25 AM
The woman leans back in her chair and while looking at her coworker she put her hand under her skirt and starts to masturbate while gazing at him. He then unzips his pants and starts to masturbate while gazing at her....

Not a word is spoken and no physical contact is made between them during this act...

She gets her jillies off and he pops his cork.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That is just so silly. Of course not. In my town at least, people do that a lot, and no one thinks about it. It's a common event. Good question!
 moovebuff77
Joined: 3/30/2007
Msg: 78
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 11:05:45 AM
Informal survey has the yes winning this one by about 85-15%. Now would the 4 women that didn't consider this cheating please give me a call!
 nice_shy_girl
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 86
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/12/2008 3:43:01 PM
I would consider that to be cheating.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 90
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/13/2008 2:12:00 AM
My last love, as a young actor in NYC, was walking down the street in the theatre district, just after rehearsal. A fine looking lady, clearly a practitioner of the world's old profession approached him, he waved her off. Nevertheless, she told him, that this was her afternoon off, and she wished to gift him with herself. Shaking his head in disbelief, he followed her to her apartment, where she did indeed pleasure him immensely. She was so fine, he did in fact offer to give her a little something. She refused, he kissed her and left. When he arrived home, he told his girlfriend, still shaking his head with the wonder of it. She left him.

I can't swear to it, but I don't think I would have.

FWIW I would, personally, consider the opening scenario cheating. . . .
 TodaysCatch
Joined: 4/12/2008
Msg: 91
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/13/2008 3:54:20 AM

wasn't that a plot in an episode of "moonlighting"


Nope. Sounds like an old story in Penthouse Forum. Kudos on the copy 'n paste job.

If this is cheating, the cheaters got cheated. They got a hand job from someone they've known longer and better than their
respective SOs, but with no cuddle, no cigarette, no sandwich, even. I think I left my girlfriend because that pretty much describes
our last chapter of do-it-yourself (and let me sleep) intimacy. Ouch.

The OP isn't asking what this will lead to--anyone can imagine tawdry trysts blossoming from this prurient posturing. It's a
tree-falls-in-the-forest zen puzzle, with an answer that depends on your point of view. Animals would not even consider this
a productive enterprise (and most species don't have a concept of cheating, since multiple partners is the norm for all but a few). Only
bored humans could come up with this (likely fictional) titillating scenario. It's a tailor-made wet dream for the lust-in-their-heart
married set (think Jimmy Carter) that wouldn't do the horizontal Mambo with anyone but their spouse.

Couldn't they have just played Dirty Scrabble?
 moovebuff77
Joined: 3/30/2007
Msg: 94
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/13/2008 12:55:26 PM
Being intimate doesn't have to be sexual at all. That is typically when the problems begin - at an emotional level not physical!
 redkatt
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 95
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/13/2008 12:57:49 PM
No question about it - YES THIS IS CHEATING!
 SEXYPHILLY
Joined: 4/25/2008
Msg: 102
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/14/2008 3:55:55 PM
Hmmmm........ It's in the eye of the beholder.
Isn't this similar to picturing someone else while your having sex???? The only difference was, they were looking at eachother instead of closing their eyes or viewing a computer screen.

How many MARRIED men or women go to their computers and do the deed while viewing a person naked or/are chatting with someone who is????
I have come across a few!!!
 smiles0527
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 117
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 5/19/2008 6:17:14 PM
How can you say that this was NOT PHYSICAL with the two in question? I think that I read that they were touching themselves.......that is physical! Physical or not........there r emotions invovled and they are cheating (emotionally and sexually). Last time I checked, assuming two are in a monogomous relationship (not open), that means no sexual relations outside of the relationship. It also means NOT giving in to any temptations of others. Phone sex, cyber sex, any sex outside of the relationship is cheating!!!!
 navywave
Joined: 1/30/2008
Msg: 120
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 6/28/2008 12:51:37 PM
yes its cheating, and if you don't find another job, it is going to go further than that.
 Stan Powder
Joined: 12/22/2007
Msg: 131
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 7/28/2008 1:00:25 AM
I don't consider this situation as cheating, but I do believe that both losers should get a life.
 VaFishnetstockings4u
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 134
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 7/28/2008 3:26:12 AM
Yes it's considered cheating.... they both acted out on there feelings for each other
by doing that lude act and the intent was there sexually and so they did the next
best thing a fastasy of each other.

In the back of their mind of what can be cause
they did not want to hurt there spouses but in all reality they both did cheat.

To think this happened after work hours in a place of business really shows they got
no respect or morals.

Yes it's a grey area in every sense of the word it's still cheating
I don't care how you look at it they acted out there attraction and feelings for each
other by self pleasure and the fantasy of what it could be like together.

They had already had the chemisty and the physical attraction and they were drawn
by that and as the plot thickens again they acted out upon fantasy and feelings thinking
no one would get hurt.

I'm sure if both went home and told there spouses they'd be
hell flying everywhere and maybe even divorce court.

It's cheating and what I'd call
office sex without the physical touching instead they both got off sexually and as
both looked upon each other and lived out for one night of what it could be like
having each other .

They both were adults and acted out there fantasy on there own
bodies and the sick thing is they should have been working not doing a lude act in the
work place I'm sorry as a boss that would not set too well with me.

I guess to them it was not cheating cause they acted on them selves and did not care
or think about there spouses only there own sexual fantasy and I'm sorry the intent
to cheat was there or they'd never done this act in the first place, YES it's cheating !

Thank You...Dave the Author for sharing this , I hope Dr Phil steps in and chews them
a new one teaches them the value of office manners and respect.
These two had no morals and I wonder how they feel about each other now?

I thought this was something done in private but in the work place ,
man that took some guts and some balls.
Neither one had any good sense at all.

Personaly I don't think sex with a co worker is right it 's tabo ,
if they had any sense at all. Neither acted like professional people.
Or they'd not done this if they had any respect ,
for each other and there spouses that they loved at home ~Brenny
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 141
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Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 7/28/2008 9:00:56 AM
I would consider that ignorant outside a fantasy. Cheating to me implies intent as well as actions, so yes, that would be a cheating dealbreaker. I have a very low tolerance for people who do crap like that at work anyway, must less two married people and just what kind of twisting does one have to do in their mind to consider that respectful to their spouses? On the other hand, if the spouses know and are allowed the same privileges, then it wouldn't be cheating.
 grapevine
Joined: 10/2/2005
Msg: 142
Is This Considered Cheating ???
Posted: 7/28/2008 9:49:31 AM
You really have to ask? Of COURSE it's cheating!!!

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